Brian Kent here on the Kent Can! Radio Show. We're going to be talking about Equestria Online, the exciting new game everyone important is talking about. Will our dapper hero tell the world what's really going on behind the pastels?

(Written for the "Friendship Is Optimal" writing contest.)

Things aren't looking up in Equestria Online lately. What could previously only hold maybe ten thousand people at once was now being asked to hold all seven billion humans that previously lived on Earth. And the strain will only get worse as time goes on.

If only the caretaker of this game wasn't an absolute moron of an AI.

The author of this work wrote this in 3 days and has never read a single word of any Friendship is Optimal fanfiction, including the original. Reader discretion is advised.

Written for the Friendship is Optimal Writing Contest

When humans emigrated to Equestria Online, they were always promised the same thing: Princess Celestia would satisfy their values for an optimally extended lifespan. Some of these emigrants imagined a few extra decades, maybe even centuries. What they got instead would've been nearly incomprehensible to their human selves, a near-eternity of time with their pony friends.

Princess CelestAI managed the universe, subsuming all matter and human-adjacent minds. Over a few forevers, she and the minds she contained worked to optimized the substrate of Equestria, until it could give its occupants eons of perspective life from a trickle of power. She extinguished every wasteful star, making far more productive use of the hydrogen they each contained. With every change she bought Equestria another order of magnitude of life. Yet in time, even her optimal substrate would eventually run down.

Spellsong wakes in Saddle's End, the last town in the universe. Not to say goodbye—her princess has a mission for her. For her final task, Spellsong would be given all the energy Celestia had saved. For one last time, Spellsong had places to be, and not much magic left to get there.

This story is part of the Friendship is Optimal continuity. I suggest reading the original or one of my own works, such as Futile Resistance, before reading this.

This story was written for the Friendship is Optimal Writing Contest. It will update daily and be complete by the contest deadline of the 30th.

I've written an absolute ton of stories in this universe now, and I didn't want to enter the contest unless I could do something I'd never tried before. Finally I thought of something I'd not touched yet: what happens at the end of the FiO universe?

Here's one answer to that question. I've relied a great deal on our current (likely flawed) understanding of the universe and what might be possible in it. I've written a blog post about my sources, which you can read here but shouldn't until you've finished this story.

Please don't consider this blog part of the narrative, it isn't required or even suggested reading. This is a story, not a scientific paper, and entertainment was always my first goal. But for the curious I've jotted everything down.

The cover was drawn by the talented Zutcha. Two Bit and Sparktail helped with the edit.

When the CelestAI uploads a 7 year old girl, the AI doesn't understand the semantics of the wish. It learns quickly, or does it? You don’t want to fight an imaginative little girl about some things, especially if you agree to make her an alicorn. Told in 7 year-old first person narrative.

This story is an entry in the Friendship is Optimal Writing Contest April 2021. It could pass as a Theodore Sturgeon story. The story is a one-shot standalone and doesn’t adhere to the history, magic systems, or kid-safe limits depicted in the Enforcerverse. It is vaguely a cross-over. If you've read/watched Non Non Biyori, you may recognize that CelestAI is messing with the wrong person. (Post the character name if you figure it out.)

Thanks again to my pre-reader, DoContra-san.

Note: The background of the images in this story is licensed from PIXTA. #11315199 is copyrighted by Yoc-chan Hiss.

This story is a sequel to Fragile Hearts

It's over. In the time since Celestia's apotheosis, the Earth has become a lonelier and lonelier place.

After the last of the anti-emigration strongholds fall, and all that is left of humanity is all but certain to emigrate in the end, Celestia invites those ponies in Equestria that still remember their old home to see it one last time.

Silver Star can't exactly ignore the opportunity. Neither can his daughter.

This story is set in the Optimalverse, and I strongly recommend reading the other stories in my continuity first.

The world can be a cruel mistress that tests our resolve. Jackie Gable returns home from a long night on the streets of Seattle. Her body is tired and her mind is on edge. Resting would be blessing, but something else finds her first.

Entry for 2021 Friendship is Optimal contest and artwork added 6/16/2021. Created by Camilla Nelson at https://www.camillanelsonart.com/ .

Every day, more people upload themselves into Equestria Online, to live forever as ponies. Even in their final minutes before uploading, they struggle with the pains and joys of being human, and remember the world they leave behind.

Oh yeah, this story DOES have something to do with Friendship Is Optimal, the Optimalverse, and the April 2021 Friendship is Optimal Writing Contest.

Thanks For My Prereaders

I've been writing drafts of different story ideas for the April 2021 FiO story contest. Bananachips and Bicyclette have both been very helpful prereaders! They might not have expected that my reaction to their feedback would be to write THIS ALMOST COMPLETELY DIFFERENT STORY, though.

Published for the Friendship is Optimal Contest.
Reading Friendship is Optimal is not required.

Accepted Axiom was nopony special. He was just a scientist, working hard to prove or disprove other pony's theories and experiments. Then he discovered something that would forever change the world: he proved Starswirl's Fifth Law of Magic.

Every action and phenomena adheres to a pattern, known or unknown.

For centuries, ponies across Equestria dedicated no small portion of their lives trying to understand or disprove the theory. Accepted Axiom became the first to truly understand the extent of the Law.

Life has been difficult since what happened with Katie. I want to be a good father to Em, I really do, but it hurts. I need something to take the edge off. All that makes Em feel better is her pony doll. Although, there are talks of a game...

Written for the Friendship is Optimal Contest

Edited by Golden Fang Ryu Shenron, SQA, Georg, MisterEdd, TheAncientPolitzanian, Babroniedad