Harmony
Octavia's muzzle twitched as a few sunrays fell across her body. Her body slowly stretched, then recoiled from the sun with the motion of a pony who wanted just a few minutes more tucked in up in her comfy, comfy bed. She turned slightly, one hoof falling off of her face and clapping against a flagstone.
Huh?
The jolt brought her back to a level of mild awareness, and she groaned slightly as she cracked her eyes open. She felt exhausted. Maybe, she thought, she had stayed up too late or practiced something unusually strenuous. Whatever the case, though, she had practicing to do, and it wouldn't get done with her lying in bed. She would need to force herself up, untangle herself from the covers, and...
She realized, as the room swam into focus, that she was not in her bed. Remembering everything else from there was the work of only a few moments.
With a start, she scrambled to her hooves, stumbling on the rough floor a few times as she frantically looked around. Her first hurried looks were not for the tyrants, or the exit, or even for her beloved cello, but for the others. Her five friends had journeyed through a forest full of monsters with her, and she had to find them. “Please be okay,” she muttered, forcing her aching and tired body to rotate. “Please be okay, please be okay...”
Just behind her, to her great relief, were most of the others. Fluttershy was asleep, her head on Bluenote’s tummy and her mane tickling the tubist's muzzle as she snored quietly. Bluenote too was out like a light. Lyra Heartstrings had somehow gotten onto one of the thrones before collapsing, and her legs kicked about a little bit as she lived through some wild and adventurous dream. To the side of the chairs was Medley, curled up into a little ball of pony and sleeping motionlessly. And Vinyl...
Octavia blinked. Vinyl was gone.
“Vinyl?” she called, leery of waking the others but fearing the worst for the leader of their group. “Vinyl, where are you? Are you there?”
She looked all around the room without finding her. The walls on multiple sides of the room had crumbled and she hurried to the rubble, fearing that the DJ had been thrown there in the wild magic storm that had ensued that night. One pile in particular seemed new, and she began moving the rocks and stones as hurriedly as she could. “Vinyl, if you are under there, say something! I will--"
“Uh, Tavi?”
Octavia looked up, blushing. Vinyl was staring at her through one of the holes in the wall.
“Where were you?” asked Octavia.
Vinyl frowned. “Just went to go look outside, make sure the sun and moon were the right size and place. They are. We saved the world.” She grinned. “Wait, you were looking for me, weren’t you? Aw, you do care!”
“No, I -- that is -- “ Octavia blushed even harder, causing Vinyl to laugh loudly. “Vinyl!”
“Relax. No shame in having friends.” Vinyl winked cheekily and trotted back past her. “So! We saved the world. We should celebrate.”
“We should go home.” Octavia frowned, looking around. She wasn’t looking forward to a return trip through the Everfree, especially since they now had a bunch of heavy instruments to move through the woods as well. “I still have difficulty believing that we survived...”
“Why not? We’re just that awesome.”
Octavia looked up through the ceiling. “So... we really did it? We stopped them, and saved the world?” It seemed so impossible, but the proof was before her. The sun and moon were no longer battling it out overhead. Instead, there was just the warm, simple light of dawn steadily illuminating the room. “I wonder where the tyrants went...”
“Oh, they’re right outside.” Vinyl pointed at the front door, which Octavia now saw was slightly ajar. “They dragged themselves out just after that green thing left them.”
For a moment, Octavia couldn't speak.
Then: “They’re still here?!”
“Yeah, but -- hey, wait!”
Octavia turned to the others. “Wake up!” she yelled. “The alicorns are still here! We have to fight them, now, before they recover! Hurry!”
Medley groaned as she opened her eyes. “Really, Tavi?”
“Yes! Hurry, now, we have to stop them!”
“No, we don’t!” called Vinyl, but everypony ignored her. With a few yawns and grunts of pain, the others got up and hurried towards Octavia. Vinyl, sighing, followed.
Octavia nodded at her friends, then seized her cello from where she’d set it down the night before, fastened it to her back, and ran forward. She wasn’t sure what she had expected to happen to the tyrants, although 'being returned to their astral prisons' would have been her first preference. If they were still outside, though, and merely sleeping or readying themselves for round two, she might have only one chance to hit them before they could get up.
“Wait!” repeated Vinyl, but Octavia and the others ignored her. The cellist opened the door and dashed out into the hallway, scanning frantically for the alicorns. She saw a flicker of movement from one of the side rooms and dashed at it, hoping against hope that she was not too late. Before she could get into the room, though, the door opened again and an alicorn exited.
For a few moments, there was only silence.
“That’s her?” asked Medley. “Seriously?”
“She...” Octavia began. “She is so...”
“She’s so CUTE!” said Fluttershy, eyes sparkling.
The pony that had once been Nightmare Moon had lost over two feet of height, and though her mane still sparkled like the stars in the night sky, it did seem somewhat dimmed. She looked more like a filly of college age than an immortal demigoddess. Octavia didn’t know what to think. It was as if Canterlot Castle had suddenly turned into a small hamlet. “Nightmare Moon?” she managed, ready for any sort of trick.
“Seriously?” said Medley. “Wow. We hit her harder than we thought.”
Bluenote chuckled. “Yep.”
Meanwhile, the pony looked aggravated. “I am not cute!” she insisted. “I am the Princess of the Night, I move the moon and stars, I wield power unknown, I fight star serpents and sea monsters with ease!” She blushed. “I am many things, but cute is not--”
“Oh, yes you are, sister,” called another voice, and a white-coated, rainbow-maned alicorn trotted into the hallway from another side room. She was also shorter than any of the musicians, and even her horn was now a bit tinier than Lyra's. “You always had all the stallions asking after you.”
The first pony’s blush deepened. “TIA!”
(Meanwhile, Fluttershy was looking between the two as if trying to figure out which one was cuter. Bluenote poked her. “Breathe,” she whispered.)
“Wait.” Lyra blinked. “Those two... Burning Sun and Nightmare Moon?”
“Not exactly.” The white-coated alicorn turned to them. “I was... I mean, my name is Celestia. My sister’s name is Luna. We ruled the nation, until...” She paused. “Until we were corrupted.”
“The exact story is not important.” Luna looked down. “But... we became the tyrants, and we warred, and in the end our own creation sealed us away for a millenium. Until we broke out and warred again, and you stopped us.”
Luna didn’t seem ready to do anything else, but Celestia put a hoof on her back and gently guided her into a bow before bowing herself. “You have our thanks.”
“Told you they were cool now,” called Vinyl.
Octavia blinked. “I am confused,” she said at last. “What happened?”
“You’re sure we don’t need to fight them anymore?” asked Medley.
“You probably have many questions,” said Celestia. “As do I, I must confess. I am still not exactly sure what happened to us... but perhaps our creation can be of some assistance.”
Octavia’s eyes widened slightly. In all the excitement, the princess had slipped from her mind. “Is she alright?” she demanded. “Princess Cadance, did you hurt her? She had better be alive--”
“She is,” said Celestia. “Neither of us broke her--”
“If she is badly hurt, I swear, I will--”
And then the impossible happened.
"There is no need to worry, Octavia."
Octavia and all the others turned, and there, in the doors leading to the front entrance of the castle, looking battered and bruised but very much alive, was Princess Cadance.
Octavia forgot all else and, pushing swiftly past the others, dashed at the Princess. She felt herself leaping through the air, and then she was embracing Princess Cadance in the front of the hall. “Princess! You’re alive!” She hugged her closely. “Thank the stars! I was so worried! I--"
And then Cadance was hugging her, and her friends had crowded around her, and Octavia felt like the happiest mare in the world.
***
Princess Cadance had learned many things in the thousand-plus years since her creation. One, as it turned out, was a spell to summon delicious feasts from the air.
“I knew you had been corrupted,” she told the two alicorns, who were bowing at the foot of the table. Despite her repeated protests, both had refused to take a seat with her and the six mortal musicians. “I still don’t know exactly what it was, but some entity or spirit was able to twist you.”
“You were not created until long after our feud began,” Luna protested. “You never knew us when we were... ourselves. How could you know we were altered?"
Cadance’s smile was gentle. “Your advisors, your administrators... and your close friends... saw the changes. Though not immortal, they communicated with each other, elder to younger. It was they who convinced you to create me... and they who, later, told me what they feared.”
She bowed her head. “I was only a golem, but you made me better than you knew. I did not only want to fulfill my duty to raise the sun and moon. I wanted to help you... my parents, in every important sense. I tried to learn everything I could to help you... magic, diplomacy, anything. But all I did was for naught.” She paused. “I’m not sure why the entity did not possess me as well. Perhaps it is because of my artificial nature. But instead, it convinced you two that I was the enemy and needed to be shoved aside.”
“And we continued to feud,” said Celestia, softly, “until we broke into open warfare. And then you were forced to use the Elements of Harmony on us.”
Cadance did not speak for several long moments. “I am sorry,” she said at last. “Had I acted earlier, or... or used the Elements properly, as my student and her friends have... I would not have lost you two to the stars for a millenium. I--”
“No,” said Celestia. Despite her reduced size, stature, and power (for Cadance had confirmed that the two alicorns were now no stronger than your average mortal pony), she still sounded regal. “We let ourselves be corrupted. I resented my sister, and envied her, and hated her artistic gifts... a thousand malevolent thoughts, none of which I ever expressed but none of which I let myself forget. It is no surprise the spirit found fertile ground in my soul to twist me to its point of view. In a moment of weakness, it came to me and told me it could help me. I allowed it, and...I did not even notice the change, it was so gradual, but one day, I was trying to kill you both.” She lowered her head.
“I was no better,” said Luna. “I was so jealous of your popularity and fame... I wanted that. The spirit asked me, and I too gave in.”
“What’s the spirit called, your majesty?” asked Lyra.
Cadance frowned. “I know of no name.”
“It called itself as Nemesis,” said Celestia. “Beyond that, I know nothing about it.”
“I have a question,” said Medley.
Cadance looked at her. “Yes?”
“How come nopony knew about this? Except for Lyra, we all thought that Celestia and Luna were myths.”
Cadance was again quiet for a few moments. “My function was to serve the princesses of Equestria and keep them from strife. I had failed, and I was ashamed.” She shut her eyes. “Even now, though I have grown so much since my creation, it still hurts. I could not bear to even think on my failure... I allowed knowledge of the alicorns to fade away.” She turned to the alicorns. “I am sorry. I had no right to erase your tens of thousands of years of peaceful rule for my own peace of mind--”
“The fault was ours,” said Celestia. “Ours, and ours alone. You... you did far more than we could have expected. You were created only to move celestial bodies, but when the time came, you saved the citizenry from us, and us from each other. You have nothing to be ashamed of.”
The three alicorns were silent for several moments, until Celestia nodded at Luna and both approached the golem. “We have been negligent in our duties,” said Celestia. “We allowed ourseles to be corrupted by evil, and forced you into a position you were in no way designed for. We have put you through so much stress and strain that you have every right to hate us.” The two bowed.
Luna added, “Can you ever forgive us?”
Cadance looked at them, and Octavia realized that she was crying. “Of... of course...”
And then the three were hugging, and crying, and Cadance was lightly thumping them on the head and saying, “If you ever! Do that! Again! I’m going to put you in time-out for ever!” And the musicians could not help but smile at the reunion.
***
The rest of the breakfast passed uneventfully, with the musicians mostly listening to Cadance talking with her creators. They did speak, though, when the conversation moved to discussing the Elements.
“You are now Bearers of the Elements of Harmony," said Cadance. "Through your superlative virtues, you have each bonded to one such Element. Together, you wield magical power unmatched in all the land."
“And the power is in our instruments?” asked Medley.
“Yes. Normally, they will act as they always have. But when you need the Elements, you will be able to use those instruments to activate them.”
Bluenote put a hoof to her chin. “So, when great evil comes to Equestria, we should schedule a gig there and we’re good?”
Cadance had to laugh at that. “I suppose so.”
Vinyl brightened. “Hey, I’ve been applying for permits for months to do a show at the gates of Tartarus--”
“No,” said Cadance, Celestia, Luna, and Octavia, all at once.
The alicorns also discussed how the government had changed in the last thousand years, and how it would continue to act in the future. Both Celestia and Luna were a bit confused at the idea of the commoners electing officials to represent them in one of the government chambers, though Cadance assured them that it worked quite well on the whole. The topic of whom would occupy the royal throne also came up.
“Neither of us can move sun or moon now,” said Luna. Her horn glowed futilely, and she scowled up at the sky for a moment. “I knew I shouldn’t have made that moon so heavy.”
Celestia giggled.
“It might be best if you remain regent for now, both for meteorological reasons, and...” she trailed off.
“You know how the government works,” said Celestia. “We need to learn from you. And we need to regain the trust of the populace.”
Luna nodded.
“Will you ever get your powers back?” asked Lyra. She had been the most spritely at breakfast besides Vinyl, and in fact seemed to have entirely forgotten that they had been fighting the alicorns to the death a few hours ago.
“Eventually, they will,” said Cadance. “My creators gave much of themselves to Nemesis, so when you drove it from them, they naturally lost all that they had given. In time, I believe they will recover and heal.” She nodded her head. “There will be a day when Princess Celestia again will watch over the day, and Princess Luna the night.”
“That day is far in the future,” said Celestia. “We should focus on the present, for the time being.”
“In the present, it might be best if you two take part in public service projects,” said Cadance. “Cleaning, construction, and so forth. That would let ponies know that you want to help them now.”
Luna paused. “...would we have to wear the uniforms?”
“Of course! We look cute in them,” said Celestia, smiling.
“Tia!”
Celestia turned back to Cadance. “From what you have described, the government is so different now from when we reigned.” She paused. “How did you know what changes to make? That was not part of your design.”
Cadance smiled slightly. “Hmm. Octavia -- do you know the answer?”
For a moment, Octavia was flummoxed, but then she realized what the right answer had to be. “Those same advisors and counselors. No -- more than that. Those same friends. The ones that helped you know what you had to do to save the nation from the alicorns... they helped you thereafter too.” She nodded. “Not only by teaching you knowledge, but by allowing you to learn and grow past your original functionality. Until you were as capable as they of running the nation.”
Cadance smiled. “Exactly. My friends made it possible.”
“But how?” Celestia frowned. “My sister and I were the greatest mages in history. What magic did your friends know to improve on our design?”
“What spells?” asked Luna, looking a bit eager.
“No spells,” said Cadance. “No cantrips, or incantations, or anything of that sort. Just the magic of friendship... but that was enough.”
She smiled brightly. “And I am sure that, as long as you two form a close circle of friends, and stay true to them... even should Nemesis return, it will never again find a hoofhold in your hearts.”
Both true alicorns bowed their heads, and Octavia saw tears falling from their eyes.
“Now -- I for one would like to hear about how, exactly, six musicians made their way through this forest and to the Elements,” said Cadance. Her eyes twinkled. “Octavia?"
Octavia nodded slightly, and then the six began their story.
***
The two alicorns would return with Princess Cadance to Canterlot, though first the golem princess would transport the Elements and their instruments out of the Everfree Forest. Octavia smiled as she watched the others pack up before turning to Princess Cadance. “I am glad we saved the world.”
“As am I.” Cadance bowed her head. “Octavia, I... I am so proud of you right now. Prouder than you can know.”
Octavia bowed. "I am glad I was able to satisfy you, Princess." She paused. "I understand now why my prior actions were inappropriate, and why they reflected badly on you. I apologize."
“Accepted," said Cadance, easily and with a smile. "And, based on your story, I know now that you understand the importance of friendship. You could never have made it this far had you not been able to truly empathize with and befriend these other ponies.”
The two were silent for several moments.
When Cadance next spoke, it was with a brisk, businesslike aspect. "We must return to Ponyville so the other five musicians may return home. You, of course, may accompany my creators and I back to Canterlot.” Cadance paused, a curious expression crossing her face. “I am mindfull of the promise I made to you earlier. You have satisfactorily demonstrated your ability to work on a team, so, as promised, I will not ask you to associate with the other students anymore. I will provide for you a room, and you may compose and practice as you wish.”
Octavia suddenly felt cold. She knew she should be happy -- Cadance was offering her everything she had wanted since beginning her studies in Canterlot. She had wanted it so much that it was the temptation Nightmare Moon’s trap had offered her. But...
If she was locked in a room, she wouldn’t see her friends again. She wouldn’t see Fluttershy helping her birds, or Bluenote cracking jokes, or Lyra swooning over her crush, or Medley perfecting her harp, or Vinyl... being Vinyl. She wouldn’t see or hear any of them. It would just be her, alone, forever and ever...
“Is something wrong?” asked Princess Cadance.
“It is...” Octavia paused. “I do not want to leave them,” she said. “I mean... I know I have only known them for a short time, but I do not want to return so quickly. They gave me a chance when they did not need to, and they are such good ponies, and...” she trailed off. “I will miss them,” she said at last.
Cadance was quiet for a few moments. “Are you sure?” she asked. “I won’t be disappointed in you if you want a quiet life of perfecting your talent, Octavia. You have already done more for the world than a great many other ponies.”
“I am sure. I do not want to lose my friends -- not now, not just to lock myself away.” She paused, realizing what she was about to ask. “Princess, I... you have given me so much of your time and energy, teaching me, but I... if I could stay a little longer...”
She couldn’t find the words.
Fortunately, Cadance understood. She smiled and beckoned the other musicians closer with a hoof. They trotted up to her. “It occurs to me,” she said, “that the music of Ponyville and the surrounding region is not well known in Canterlot.”
“Nope,” said Medley. “No orchestras out here.”
“Well, I think that -- as the nation’s capital -- Canterlot should have knowledge about the music from all Equestrian cities.” Cadance nodded. “Octavia, if you are willing, I am going to give you a new assignment. You are to remain in Ponyville and study its music for the foreseeable future. Become familiar with its styles... and its musicians.” She smiled. “Make regular reports to me. I think this will be good for you, and...”
She didn’t need to finish, because Octavia was already nodding. “Yes!” said Octavia, her self-control slipping for a moment. “Yes, of course. Thank you princess!”
“Wait, she’s moving here?” asked Medley.
Lyra grinned. “Yay! A new neighbor!”
“She’s not going to help you with Bonbon,” said Medley.
“Oh, I can be very persuasive.” Lyra’s eyes sparkled. “Hey Octavia! Let’s do a duet! On the theme of CANDY!”
Octavia could not help but smile. “It would be an honor.”
Bluenote approached her. “Happy to have you here, Octavia. You’ll make a great addition to the town.”
“If you need anything to help you settle in, just ask,” said Fluttershy. “I’m glad you’re staying too.”
“Sounds awesome.” Vinyl grinned. “Happy to have you, Tavi.”
“Thank you. And... I’m happy to be here.” Octavia nodded her head. “I truly am.”
***
“Mail for you, Octavia!”
Octavia stuck her head out of the spare bedroom. “Thank you,” she called. “I’ll be down in a moment.”
Her heart quickened as she trotted down the hallway and then the stairs into the confectionary. She had needed a room, and, by good fortune, that mare that Lyra was crazy about was renting one for a reasonable price. Everything had worked out well. Lyra had even been okay with it, on the condition that Octavia regularly made reports to her about the things her 'Bonnie' liked and didn't like. Her assignment for the day was to find her favorite color, so Lyra could figure out the perfect flowers for their eventual wedding.
Bonbon passed her the mail. “Are you heading out?”
“Yes. I am meeting with the other Bearers in the park. We are going to try to play something.” She chuckled. “It will be... interesting to see if we can do it without the Elements helping us, but I certainly think it is worth trying.”
“Good luck!”
As Octavia stepped outside, she looked at the envelope. She smiled when she recognized the hoofwriting on the outside as Pageturner's. Octavia had written her a long letter, apologizing for her bad behavior and asking if they could possibly be friends again. She hadn’t hoped for much, knowing how badly she had hurt her assistant, but hopefully she would give the cellist another chance...
Octavia opened the envelope, and her heart sank. It was just her own letter to Pageturner, mailed back to her. Unopened. There was only one other page in the envelope, a small note:
“I tried for years. I can’t try anymore.”
For a moment, Octavia bowed her head. She could not honestly blame Pageturner; the mare had tried, and it was Octavia who had failed her for years. Why did I wait so long to learn about friendship? All the ponies I hurt... it was not right.
But then she shook her head. Yes, she had done some bad things. But she had friends now. They would help her not hurt anypony else... and would help her learn and grow into a pony that everypony could be truly proud to know. She would keep trying. She would practice friendship just like she practiced her music, and with her friends as her teachers and helpers, she knew she would get far. She would become a pony everypony would be proud to know, she would make amends to all those she had wronged and she would live just as ponies should.
It would be hard, but she would do it. After all, she had the best friends in all the world.
“HEY, TAVI!”
Octavia waved at Vinyl, who was standing in front of the others in the park. “Hello!” she said as she hurried forwards. “Are you ready?”
“My birds are all warmed up!” chirped Fluttershy.
“Let’s play some awesome music!” cheered Lyra, summoning her lyre with a quick spell. “Come on, this’ll be great!”
Bluenote blatted a note of acknowledgement.
“This might not be your style,” warned Medley, as Octavia got her cello set up. “Sure you want to sit in this set?”
“Of course I do,” said Octavia. “You are my friends, and I would rather play music with you than do anything else in the world right now.”
And so they began to play, and as the sun once again rose over Equestria, music once again rose to meet it.
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A wonderful ending to a very interesting Idea
Awesome!!
I don't remember an epic battle with Corona and NMM. When did tha happen?!
2704907: They fought a bit in Chapter 15, but in Chapter 16 it was the Elements vs. both of them.
Historically, they battled a lot before Cadance shut them down with the Elements the first time, but that was in the past so we did not see it.
*Grins and applauds* very cute, I liked the piece with Pageturner, it felt very appropriate.
I still think Pageturner refusing to forgive Octavia says more about Pageturner right now than anything. She was there for Octavia right up until everything blew up in Tavi's face, and was one of the first to walk away when things went to Tartarus, pulling a "Oops, you're too late, I'm gonna act like you did to me and see how you like it."
It's like the song says, you find out who your friends are.
2705316: I don't blame her for leaving Ponyville. The world was ending, and she had friends and family back home she wanted to be with. Octavia hadn't really been a friend to her before, and she found it absurd that Octy suddenly wanted to act like their relationship was so deep that she would stay with Octy in some rural, far-flung town for no clear reason instead of getting home.
As for this bit... well, it's still a couple of days since their falling out. Perhaps their relationship will heal with time. :-)
The Nemesis, eh? Interesting.
And young adult Celestia and Luna? Awesome.
It's not creepy!
Really looking forward to C!Boast Busters.
I just noticed something while re-reading this; Cadance see both Celestia and Luna as her parents (she mentioned it once) but I get the impression that they don't see Cadance as their daughter (either because of lack of biology, anti-construct philosophy or even because they are sisters and that would make the implications...creepy to them).
I imagine you plan to stick with Octavia and crew in the sequel story (stories hopefully) but would the Celestia/Luna/Cadance connection be something we can expect (i.e. really really hope) to see in the sequel(s)?
CAN'T WAIT FOR PEOPLE TO START DEMONIZING PAGETURNER
ALTERNATE ELEMENT FIC READERS: THEY NEVER FAIL
I QUIT
Excellent ending! Seeing Celestia in a similar state to how Luna was at the end of "Friendship is Magic" was very interesting. Cadance is the most powerful of the three, now, which changes their usual dynamic an awful lot. I'd be keen to find out how Cadance transitioned from being a simple, obedient golem to the well-rounded pony she is today. Magic of Friendship, of course, but still, there's a big story to be told there, I think.
It is interesting that Octavia, the POV character, is neither the Element of Magic nor the leader (as you say, Vinyl is the closest thing to a leader they have). She is, however, the pony who needed to learn the most about friendship over the course of their adventure, which is the most important thing.
So... guitar battle against Trixie next episode?
2706130: Trixie was deliberately trying to wreck everything. Octavia's just... not great at event planning. :-)
A nice ending. Looking forward to seeing what comes next.
I liked it, the only problem I have is that I think the fight against the Tyrants could have done with being longer, maybe a bit where the elements don't seem to work or a bit more serious tempting before the Alicorns are downed by the power of friendship rock.
I'm also a bit surprised that Luna and Celestia were fixed but I think that's me wearing my Lunaverse head, Nemesis might still be out there ready for a bit more tempting after all.
2708618: I decided I'd rather have Nemesis than the alicorns for recurring opposition. I thought it fit the fic better to have the alicorns saved/purged of dark influences, and I guess I'm just a sucker for a happy ending. :-)
I would also like at some point to explore the whole 'trying to reintegrate into society' thing, both regarding the temporal disconnect (neither of them were easily able to understand the whole 'democracy' thing that Cadance has, in a limited measure, instituted) and also trying to make amends for their acts. I still like the idea of cutting to them, maybe six months later, dressed in construction outfits (with adorable hard hats!) and helping to construct some animal clinic or something.
2708642
Put foremare Fluttershy in charge of them, she'll make sure they work hard fixing things.
How powerful are the Alicorns now? They don't have their godlike powers but how do they match up with unicorns, more powerful than a unicorn can possibly be? Matching a powerful unicorn? Average unicorn? Average unicorn foal?
2708897: Average power, though for all three tribes. Average magic, flight, growing, etc. Also, they do have a lot of knowledge they've built up over the many years, though their bodies may no longer be able to utilize it right away.
2706245: Oh, I hope not. I trust my readers not to demonize anyone! :-)
2708935
Maybe Nemesis can do that for us?
Sure to be a little resentful, treated like dirt by her boss for years then when she finally gets the backbone to leave suddenly her boss is little miss friendship and becomes a national hero. Its enough to give you a voice in your head offering you power to do something about it.
Until you get frendshipped anyway.
Great ending. I fully agree with pageturner, btw. Octavia was a selfish, stuck-up jackass for most of their relationship. It's gonna be interesting when she shows back up.
2670200: Whoops, totally forgot to reply to this:
Yep, it's lying so the ponies don't hurt it more. As for the first part, I wanted to avoid the issue of, "Well, if it just feeds off anger, won't it eat all their anger and leave them calm and ready to go?" I've seen that come up in some stories where the enemies feed on hate or pride or some other bad emotion; it seemed (and others observed this too) like that should be a good thing because it gets the bad stuff out of you. So I wanted to make sure to verify that, yes, the tagasoro would kill them if left unchecked.
Might eventually get around to reading this
No no no, it has to be Inferno Sun, see. That way, you've got a heaven/hell inversion going on for Celestia, to parallel the Nightmare/Night Mare pun for Luna.
Second chapter in, Octavia's train runs into Ponyville, and I can tell I'm going to love this story. Haven't even finished reading it, just felt a need to comment early.
2785785:
I might not have written it right, then, but that wasn't my intention. My goals for the trials were:
Kelpies: Medley beat up the kelpies, doing so with the knowledge Fluttershy provided about their weaknesses. Fluttershy in turn was able to share her information because the others (I think Vinyl and Lyra? I'd have to check) kept reassuring her that they could be okay.
Kraken: Lyra figured out the problem and played spellsongs to soothe the kraken and buff the others, while Octavia, Medley, and Zecora raised the spikes.
Leshy: Octavia figured out the problem, and Medley was willing to volunteer to help her break out of the trap even though she might injure Octy doing so.
Tagesoro: Bluenote broke the spell while Octavia and Medley caught the beast.
Nightmare: ...yeah, this one was soloed by Fluttershy.
Golem: Octavia, Fluttershy, and Bluenote kept Lyra and Medley occupied while Vinyl fought off the golem.
I suppose I might not have displayed that clearly, though.
The idea for Octavia was that she was willing to insist on what she knew was right, even though she knew it might antagonize the only friends she'd ever made. She desperately did not want to lose Vinyl, Medley, and the others, as they were the only ones who were giving her a chance, but she wouldn't lie and pretend she didn't hear what she heard even to placate them.
As for Vinyl, what I was going for was that her friendship with the rest of the team was what let her guide them all the way through the woods, and even in that final battle with the golem, with two members down, she was able to have the rest of the team help her and score a victory regardless. Bluenote, up until that point, had only fought one monster and hadn't done much else, but Vinyl used her understanding of Bluenote's talents and abilities so that she could help fend off the others. (Vinyl probably couldn't have taken on Lyra, Medley, and the golem at once by herself).
But again, I understand that I might not have expressed this clearly.
The only thing was missing from this awesome fic was a great end credits song to wrap everything up. As I read the wrap up where Tavi got her assignment, I kept waiting for a musical number. Heck, to be precise, music was starting up for my head for it. Oh, well...this was a great start to another universe and I can't wait to see more.
So, I finally finished, and overall I really enjoyed. I got a little uncomfortable as we went into further detail on Cadance (your origin for is by far my least favorite thing about this setting), but that's a minor gripe. So then, 5 average chapters and 1 bad chapter, but the other 11 ranging from good to great; so I guess my final rating is a thumbs up.
Still, not sure if I'm ready to make any kind of commitment to reading further stories in this setting, but that's more a personal issue. I've got a backlog of 90 fics across this sight on my want-to-read list, so I'm naturally hesitant to get in any way involved with what could become a very large series (and I do hope it does, you've done good work here and I hope you keep doing more good work).
Still, all reluctance aside, I've heard some good things that have me VERY excited at the prospects of your AU take Boast Busters, so I'll probably try to prioritize at least that.
2728907
Huh... weird, I don't think I ever got a notification of this reply. Anyway, it only works that way if the creature literally sucks the anger out of it's targets. Instead, consider a fire; sitting by a fire provides you with warmth, but you getting warmer doesn't reduce the heat of the fire. So conceptually the tagasoro could stoke the flames of anger in its victims, feeding off the hatred being radiate until they burn out (possibly literally).
2785839
Didn't get a notification for this either...
Well, I can understand your intent, however, for each trial there was still one specific pony whose absence would have made it insurmountable. So, even if the others helped a little along the way each event was still a narrative trial of worth for one specific pony. Still, that's not really my problem, after all the show was more or less the same, except... each of the trials boiled down to defeating a monster; the exact method may have varied (especially with the kraken since it didn't actually want to hurt them), but it was still basically just the same event play across six variations.
Even at that though, I was more bored than bothered, that is until we got to Vinyl's trial. Prior to that I quite enjoyed the way she naturally fell into the leadership role, but having her solo a golem-alicorn --as epic as the fight itself might have been-- cheapened everything that came before. Admittedly, she did need the other remaining three to hold off the two that had been brainwashed, but if they hadn't been brain washed the first place the implication is that Vinyl wouldn't need any help at all, making the whole affair a lousy "trial" for Element of Magic. She'd been doing just fine proving herself by keeping the group together through the other trials, or if there was to be a sixth trial than it should have been one of concerted team effort where it is her leadership that prevails, not contrived magical expertise (though in the latter case that's basically what acquiring the elements and beating the tyrants should have amounted to). Either way, fighting the golem was a pointless endeavor that took more away from the story than it added.
...or at least that's my subjective opinion. I don't see anyone else complaining, so maybe it's not that big a deal; I'd even considered not bring it up all, but then you went and told me how much you appreciate my feedback, so I felt somewhat obliged to explain why I was having trouble enjoying the latter chapters.
2708642
And this is where you succeeded where RDD failed. You gave a more succinct and fitting conclusion for both the setting and characters than he did without lingering negativity or simply dropping the tension to kill the plot, yet still left a little open endlessness in all the right places, so that the universe could be built upon.
Not to discredit the Lunaverse or insult any of its authors, though as groups go, I feel it has gained more infamy than adoration. I know RDD is a good writer, and he's trying to regain control of his damaged universe and fix it, his latest works reflect that. But he allowed an entire season to fester under his poor first impression pilot before deciding he needed to regulate some things at the core of his creation. I'm sorry to say even your work paled to this as your underlying manipulative elements needed to fit in with the genre built up and spun out of control with a sound resolution becoming more impossible each time, eventually leading RDD to have to cut it off in one fell swoop in the season finale, both the good and bad.
I guess what I'm saying is, I'm glad you decided to be done with using political games and endless grudge and failure cycles as plot devices. Their controversy is so difficult to control, and if it can't be, it takes away from the story. Happy endings really shouldn't be attempted if the resulting taste is more bitter than sweet.
Please, do keep up the good work.
foal-sitter Cadence?
I am intrigued by this 'verse. I'll probably read the next one out of curiosity, and then make my decision after that.
3252506: Amateur pianist. Emphasis on amateur. :-)
3327258: Chennai, in India.
Glad you like Lyra!
Other than my previous questions and comments. I have just two more. What is the order of other fics in the AU? And do you have an Episode list like L!Verse does?
I liked the resolution and agree with your advisers that the note works best. Better than without one and better than forgiveness (which might happen in the right circumstances but the way she left doesn't seem like a letter would reach her).
Now, one last thing: Your alternate universe needs a timeline. It would be most helpful for people looking to read all the stories in it to know what order they happen in.
3894400 : One's been posted on the boards. Here it is!
3894412
Thank you. It was most helpful. Might I suggest putting that, or a link to it, on the front page of your group?
Considering the effort and creativity that was shown here, this should be far more popular than it is. The characters feel unique and well defined and that is what carries this story in my mind. Now to see if the author wrote anything else.
9/10 Highly recommended.
3911498
Still improper dialog, "When something is in quatioations and you don't end with a ! Or a ? Then you use a ," To say what is being said and, "the stuff between quatations is a , not a period."
Even if smirked was part of a new part. I was only pointing out the needed change of . to , in that section.
That. Was. Awesome!
Almost more epic than the Canon opener...
Welp, that note at the end was a final stab to my feels. It hurts oh so bad.
That moment where you know something you did wrong but it's too late. Always hurts.
On a small note on the previous (epic battle musical harmony) chapter, that last verse that Octavia sung. Wow. Blood and tears of our enemies, mixed with laughter of foals. I know it's part of the lyrics that were left better unchanged but, wow. Now that I read this pilot fic... either I continue with the rest of this verse or shift to the next one featured in Multiversal Harmony. Hmm...
Awww! This was awesome!
4133473
Well, MLP isn't the first fandom I've been Part of, so it would be entirely psooble for you to have seen me elsewhere on the net under a diffrent name. Though probably not, as the last community I was this active in was D&D and Transformers before that, but both were years ago and I've moslt lost touch since then.
Regardless, TY for the compliment.
Fluttershy as Generosity?
Blasphemy!Something that I'll definitelly read because it just sounds so awesome!So they have to battle not one but TWO evil alicorns...
With music...
This is going to be more amusing than watching hunters club baby seals... *more ponies rush to help!* Oh look, more baby seals! (Alondro = DBZ:A Frieza)
Burning Sun is angry because her evil alter ego name is so lmae compared to Nightmare Moon.
"My name is total BS!!!"
Congrats on your EQD feature!
Just finished reading this, and I quite like it. I was kind of expecting you to rebrand them as the Instruments of Harmony or somesuch, not make them actual instruments but that works.
4471794
It's a bit late for it now, but another good name might have been Tyrant Sun. (Other stories have used that, though.)
4474847 Scorching Sun? Scathing Star? Stellar Blaze? Corona Blaze? Solar Blaze? Solar Storm? Darth Prominence?
4480176
I have to agree, Octavia's ego is damaged, but it was for the better.
4484355
Rearrange NMM if you are amused by BS.