Ah man. Cristal Merrymints and all that, even if it's a tad late.

Some very enthusiastic present delivery. It's to die for.

Ho ho ho, did not expect a christmas special either! Alright, let's get to it.

“Hey, I brought you in on this because you’re always down to clown. Don’t start putting negativity into this, bro,” Lance warned as he twirled a candy cane in his hoof, a smirk sliding onto his face as he tossed it into the air and caught it between his lips. “Besides, what about this could be bad? This is a SOLID plan with ZERO drawbacks.”

A Lance/Greg plan with zero drawbacks? I call cap on that. Fuckers can't not fuck up something.

“No buts about it, Christmas is probably the only important holiday to ever exist, and we can’t have it without the big man himself.” Lance stepped over to Greg and nudged him. “It’s time, Greg.”

He's not wrong, it's the only holiday that matters. Don't look at a calander.

“Hell yeah, I saw him with my own eyes,” Lance said proudly. “I sat on his lap at the mall once. Dudes real.”

Mouth open, Peter shifted his gaze to Greg, who only nodded lazily.

“I saw his sleigh once fly across the sky while I was smoking a new brew,” Greg said as he looked off dreamily.

This is brilliant, shows just how stupid those guys are. Lance would think the smelly homeless man dressed as Santa at the mall is the real Santa Clause.

He couldn’t help himself as he stood on his hindlegs, forelegs spread wide. A figure began to form before them. “SANTA!”

A sudden boom sent all of them flying backwards, crashing into walls and random decor.

Okay, this is funny as hell. I'm still snickering over the imagery this gives off.

Excitedly, Lance rushed to pick up the clothing and brought it over the large man. “Here’s all your cloths!”

“Clothes…” Peter corrected, mind slowly turning.

Well, its now cannon Lance both spells it as cloths, and SAYS it as cloths.

“Unfortunately,” Scamp jokes, getting a playful slap on the shoulder from her wife.

Suddenly Shayla let out a gasp and turned around, eyes wide. “What if he doesn’t know where we live?! Last year we were on vacation, so what if he doesn’t know I exist?!”

“He knows, honey,” Scamp assured her.

“But how do you know?!”

“Because she’s your mother, she knows everything,” Mallogory pointed out, getting a confident nod from Scamp.

I absolutely love this family. We need more childhood moments of Shayla.

The thought brought a smile to her face as she moved to the kitchen to pour her some more eggnog. As she did so, she caught a glimpse of some of her alcohol.

“Don’t mind if I do,” she muttered to herself as she took it and poured a bit into her nog.

Ah so this is back before she finally kicked her alcoholism.

Without a sound, moving so swiftly she didn’t even disturb the clutter on the floor, she moved on the figure.

The figure spun on her just as she reached them, landing a powerful kick to its midsection. The powerful hit sent the figure flying through the living room and through the window, sending them into the darkness outside.

Scamp would 100% merc Santa without a thought. Because rationally thinking, Santa's not real, as far as she knows, so a rando in her house will be treated to some good ol' Viper Claw hospitality.

“What the fuck?” she muttered, realizing it was someone dressed as Santa Clause. “Hey, fucker, you alive?” she asked, giving his boot a kick. But she didn’t get a response. “Ah shit,” she said, shaking her head. She may have hit them a bit too hard.

“Whoa!” came the voice of her daughter from the window. “Is that Santa?!”

“Stay inside, Shayla,” Scamp ordered, but her daughter ignored her, jumping out and landing beside her.

“You killed him?!” she shrieked, eyes wide.

“I didn’t kill him,” Scamp said as she grabbed his boot and began to shake it. “Come on, buddy. Up and attem.”

I get the Tim Allen Santa Clause reference here, and I love it. So that means this is a riff on that movie to an extent, so I'm looking forward to seeing Scamp be forced to be Santa Clause!

“Where’d he go?” Shayla asked, poking at the clothing.

Scamp looked around, her gaze narrowed. “This freak is running around here naked somewhere…”

From Scamp's perspective, this is literally a old homeless man who's high on some shit, now running around in the nude.

“You’ve done a naughty act tonight, Scamp,” she began, reading the note with a skeptical tone. “To fix your mistake, you must finish my duty before the day's break, or Christmas will be finished forevermore. Don the suit, and the reindeer will do the rest.”

“What’s that mean, momma?”

“It means we’re calling the police. There’s a naked creep running around,” Scamp said, grabbing her daughter to take her inside.

Holy shit I'm loving this! Putting Scamp in scenario's like this is so fucking good. She's to the point and fully rational, with enough experience to know when to not be rational. So she interprets things for what they are, even if it's something like Santa Clause.

“This is amazing, momma!” Shayla yelled, eyes wide with glee as she ran under the large beast.

“Get away from them,” Scamp warned. “They could be dangerous, and I don’t want to have to kill them to protect your dumbass.”

Almost to mock her, one of the reindeer leaned down and licked Shayla’s head, leaving a large cowlick.

This is both adorable and hilarious. Plus I love how Scamp interacts with her daughter.

Shayla opened it, causing a light to shine from it as it listed her name and all her deeds. “Whoa! I’m on the nice list!”

“Shocker,” Scamp muttered. “I don’t know how when you don’t listen. Now, inside!”

“But-”

“Shayla Parker Beltosh!” Scamp said sternly, causing her daughter to finally listen. Head hung low, the young filly jumped down from the sleigh. She slowly walked past her mother, eyes down.

“I’m sorry, mother…” she said quietly, trying to hide her sniffles as tears began to flow.

Scamp watched her slowly walk to the edge of the roof, letting out a deep sigh as she looked to the sky. “Fuck,” she muttered before looking back to her daughter. “Stop, honey.”

Oh shit, Shayla's middle name comes from Scamp's old team leader/almost lover. I like that, it fits in with Scamp and how she processes the world. And again, I just love how those two interact with each other.

“No, because that’s not happening,” Scamp said, swatting the list away. But it came back, now displaying a new message.

‘If you fail, Christmas is over. Forever.’

“Momma no!” Shayla cried out. “Don’t kill Santa AND Christmas! Please!”

Okay, this one killed me. Shayla's desperation in this moment is hilarious, thinking her mother was killing the one Holiday that matters.

“Santa?” came a small voice behind her, causing her to stop her assault on the poor pine.

Cursing under her breath, she turned to see a small colt standing in the doorway to the living room, a confused look on his face. He looked from her to the tree, which was missing the majority of its branches and decorations at this point.

This scene feels like a reference to both Tim Allen AND the Grinch, and I love it.

What’s wrong with your face?” The colt’s expression suddenly changed from confusion to horror. “You don’t work for Santa! You’re the Grinch!” He began to scream like a siren, causing Scamp to panic.

She moved to stop the kid by giving him a present or something, but the sudden appearance of two adults coming up behind him stopped her.

“Lil’Jambal, what’s wro- WHO ARE YOU?!” the stallion yelled as he and the woman pulled the kid back and got in front of him.

I am dying over here!

“I’m literally Santa right now,” Scamp reasoned, but the moment she said it she cringed, as it was probably the stupidest thing she’d ever said.

“And I’m the Queen of Equestria! Get on the ground!” the stallion ordered as he picked up a bat that’d been by the couch.

“Okay I’m done,” Scamp mumbled as she reached into her pocket dimension and withdrew a gun. “You get on the ground.”

The most Scamp response ever. She pulls a literal fucking gun on a family of 3. The funny part is this isn't the first time she's done something like this

As she advanced on him, he held up a hoof, eyes wide in horror, “wait wait wait! I got money!”

“Cool,” she said as she grabbed his head in her hooves. Moments later her suit became a bit redder.

Moments like this is why I love Scamp so much.

Scamp only nodded as she pulled out the list, inspecting each of the names on the naughty list, noticing they all seemed to be just as bad, if not worse, than the guy below.

“Oh, this is going to be great,” Scamp muttered, a devilish idea hitting her as the sleigh took to the sky.

Well THIS has taken an unexpected turn. And I LOVE IT!

Kicking the door open, she caused the stallion on the bed to let out a scream of terror.

“Like touching kids, eh?” she yelled as she lifted a small christmas tree. “Guess where this is going!”

This is now up there on my favorite Scamp moments.

“Long story,” Scamp chuckled as she took a seat on the bed.

“Next question,” Mallogory began, looking her over. “Why are you covered in gore?”

“You’ll love the answer to that one,” Scamp assured her with a wide smile.

“Worrying, but let’s hear it,” Mallogory chuckled.

“Starting this off, apparently Santa is real and I was him tonight,” Scamp said.

“Huh, you’d make a terrible Santa,” Mallogory teased. “But wait, WHY were you Santa tonight?”

“Oh,” Scamp said, waving her hoof at her wife. “I think because I killed Santa I became him? I’m not really sure on the rules there.”

“Scamp…” Mallogory whined, shaking her head. “You’re not supposed to kill Santa. What would Shayla say if she knew?”

If we had more scenes of these two just talking and dealing with shit, I'd be so happy. THey have the best chemistry, and work off each other so well. It's criminal we don't see them together as often. I guess it's just hard to write, huh?

“What kind of sick fuck would do this,” Lance growled. “On Christmas of all days! No offense, Cody.”

“Why would I take offense to that?” Cody asked from his seat.

This one caught me off guard and I lost it.

He fell to his knees before the coal and threw his hooves to the sky. “I brought you into this world! STOP GIVING ME COAL EVERY YEAR YOU FAT FUCK!”

In the distance jolly laughter could be heard as Lance roared at the sky in anger.

I love the implication that Lance has gotten coal EVERY year, even the first. Probably for how selfishly adopting the kid he kissed and then forgetting about her, other than a few moments that seemed a bit sexually charged. (I'm looking at you bedtime story moment, and 'the couch' scene)