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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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I get the feeling Silver's hiding something important, and Archer gives me a bad vibe. Mist appears mostly harmless, though it's probable she's the most powerful of the three.
...This is short, so I want another chapter soon.
Also, I'm the first commenter? What the buck is happening with this story!
Edit: Refreshing a page shows so much. ...Stupidity is one thing....
ya duties like taking mist into princess lunas bedroom and doing that threesome luna suggested.
And suddenly, now Twilight is teaching her own students about the Magic of Friendship. I wonder, how does Celestia see this?
2626257
She probably feels like a grandmother.
I have the strangest feeling that Archer is going to be a problem in the future and that silver will end up being the one so save somepony.
2626279
That would get a little weird, considering her little sister and Twi are together. It's like seeing a niece with an aunt. Oh... oh I did not need that image of them as humans with those relations...
"You are so cute when you're angry."
"Tell that to the mountain."
Oh, my sides. So much funny.
Taking a personal student already?
Either way, I can't help but get a bad feeling about this Archer. Although, I am wondering what is Silver's problem.
For some reason I think Twilight would want to go over the entire process by which she became Archmage and revamp it all. Honestly, having a central figure be responsible for so many things seems a bit much. Granted, there does appear to be at least some redundancy, but not nearly enough. The Archmage position is a bit more horn/hooves on than you'd think given it's level of importance.
2626233
Seriously. I hope we find out what's got Silver so pissed off. Best guess right now: He's related to Harbinger (Or Harbinger's boyfriend) somehow.
Mist reminded me of Fluttershy, a lot.
2626290
A mountain is noticeably less durable than an Alicorn...
2626233 I second this. Archer is going to turn out into some kind of Nightmare Moon worshipper, Silver probably has something to do with the CPS, and Mist is probably a Fluttershy: Meek and shy, but ready to rip shit up when it comes time.
2626290 Same here. That bit was too funny. I about fell out of my chair.
I feel like this should have been a series of stories. The Library was a false climax as it is, and I feel as though it deserved more time than it got. It felt like you spent ten chapters leading up to that point, and then it just kind of unfolded, and as a result all of the previous problems were gone. This might end sooner than I'm expecting, but it looks like it's going to go on for several more chapters at the current rate. There's too much going on for a falling action, but at the same time, there's no major confrontations set up yet. I don't know. It feels weird to me.
2626233
I don't think Silver is going to show up again. For all his competence, he's not nearly advanced enough in his studies to be a significant threat, so that position is out, and he's far too formal for Twilight to develop a friendship with at this stage. Unless he comes back for tutoring, I don't see a reappearance incoming(I suppose it's possible for him to be hiding a greater degree of competence, but frankly, I don't think so. We've already had one crazy unicorn with aspirations above his station(HOW AM I SAYING THIS WITHOUT BEING SARCASTIC), we won't likely see another).
Archer seemed very... honest, to me. He wears his emotions on his sleeve, and he's excited and nervous. I'm not sure why you say you don't trust him. Is it because of how quickly he accepted, as opposed to the other two? Mist seemed very willing, but unable, and Silver... I'm not sure what's up with him. He might just prefer to learn on his own. Archer, however, was in a position for all of his road blocks to be removed, he was already eager to learn more, and Twilight just dangled a potential promotion to what I imagine is the most prestigious branch of the military open to unicorns in front of him. Honestly, I'm a little ashamed of Twilight- she manipulated him so hard. Not to say he wouldn't have anyways, but the way she presented it essentially took the choice away from him. *shrug*
2626532 My bad vibe comes from the fact that he seems so. . . perfect. Numerous spy and mystery novels have taught me that the guy with the least problems is the guy with the darkest secrets, so I tend to watch out for perky characters in an otherwise unperky world. He'll probably turn out to be the genuine article, but if constant reading as taught me anything it's to always prepare for the worst.
My wild assed guess is that someone threatened Mist and Silver to prevent them from getting the job offer and that left Archer as the only option.
How did they (i do not know who yet) manage to find out who Twilight would choose from to be able to threaten the right ponies? My guess is that they blanket threatened the top 10 maby top 15 choices (it is a pretty select group after all ...)
deep mana pool
smart
driven
living in Canterlot
good references ... (who you know can be very very important on a resume)
2626672
Constant reading has taught me to be aware of the genre. This is an adventure story that(hopefully) is coming to a close. Any negative role either he or silver could fill has already been filled in this story, and rehashing the plot from five chapters ago would hardly be interesting.
And we haven't seen enough of him yet to know his character. We've seen him in uncomfortable, formal settings with someone he distinctly perceives as his superior. He's tense, uncomfortable, and nervous, especially since he's learning from her now. Give him a chapter to grow. I'm sure one of the directions he'll hit is onto you. :P
Yay update!
Hmmm, ranged combat magic specialist named Archer? I'm gonna be seeing http://fc02.deviantart.net/fs16/i/2007/165/5/b/Archer_By_Tsukishoujo_by_Fate_Stay_Night.jpg the whole time he's in scene from now on
Everyone seems paranoid about Archer. I guess I'm getting senile and/or wrong genre savvy, cause I didn't find anything particularly alarming about him. He seemed like a normal student.
I hope those troll chapters that were posted a while back don't foreshadow how this story's gonna en--
*sees [Sad] tag*
...shit.
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DAMN YOU you beat me to my reference about his body being made out of swords!
Twi was kind of a bitch here, don'tcha think? "You get to study with me! Go write an essay," in addition to the other things that have already been mentioned.
Luna, you horndog
My brain just hatched a humdinger of a crackpot theory- what if Silver is Regal's kid? That would definitely explain his immediate snub of what could be the chance of a lifetime.
Hmm...
Okay, here's my guess: Silver and Mist are an item, Mist really wanted to accept, but Silver has some sort of grudge against Twilight for some reason, so he didn't want her to accept. Mist complied, but didn't want to turn down Twilight completely, so is accepting the Tuesday tutoring. This will cause Silver to freak out slightly when he finds out, prompting Twilight to intervene. Haven't figured out what Archer's deal is, but I'm getting a weird vibe from him...
So yeah. That.
I remember something about this being the last story arc before you wrap up... Damn, this better be a good one.
Since there's nothing to really work with in this chapter, I'll have to save Sometime Around Midnight until Sometime Around The Next Climax.
In lieu I shall attempt some standup comedy. Or sit down, as I'm typing it.
Ecchem.
"So, Luna wants a threesome eh? Twilight doesn't particular seem keen to share Luna's full moon. Luna might be best looking out, though, it may seem silly, but Twilight's always been the sort to make a molehill out of a mountain.
Thank you, thank you, so, three candidates eh? Let's go through 'em one by one!
Well, first of all, we had a swing and a Mist. Couldn't choose days, so she got Tuesdays, right? Luna weighing in from her shadowy corner of the room, Twilight didn't see her coming, but I get the feeling Luna would have loved to have seen those two cu- No? Seems Luna would be up for a little blue humour, though, she's the right colourful type. Ah, double-meanings, double-entendres, doubled-ended di- Still no? Ah, well, speaking of such prefixes, let's move on to candidate number two.
Silver. Ah, now, here's where things get interesting! No, wait, what's the opposite of that? Huh. Anyway, any clues from his name? Sure isn't a silver tongue, nor a brown nose. Being born with a Silver Spoon in his mouth seems out of the question, as well, though I'm not entirely sure what the police would have to say about it if he was, right Scootaloo? Riight. Anyway, so, he's got issues and he's piqued Twilight's curiosity. Curiosity killed the cat, so let's hope Silver isn't as much of a pussy as he's letting on, because Twilight tends to make molehills out of... Oh, right, that wasn't funny the first time around either, nevermind.
Archer... Now, this guy just gives me the heebie jeebies. Stepford smiler, perhaps? Apartition from his eagerness, he seems into his element enough, I just have no clue what to think about him. I'd love to take a shot at it, but with a name like that, I'm afraid he'd shoot back! Now that joke was just too uni-corny, duo think so too, trio four puns in quick succession should help it out though.
And that's the news. Mr Numbers, signing out!"
Dodges tomatoes and various rotten fruits.
I am going to be very sad if prophecy told Luna that Twilight was going to leave her ...
Archer seems far too nervous around Twilight for it to be just nerves. He's got some kind of agenda, and my bet is it's not pleasant. Especially when Twi mentioned mid-range being Archer's favored combat range. Knowing a lot about someone is something, but his reaction threw several red flags up to me. Not quite 'Nuclear Launch Detected' flags in scale, but more like 'A-10 Airstrike Incoming' flags, if i may get RTS on you for a bit.
Loyal, this may be one of the greatest scenes i've read. To date. I'm not even sure of my wordcount for FimFiction, but it's got to be near, or past, seven million words (with FoE stories included... and i lost count after four mill, but that's beside the point.). I laughed at that scene for what seemed to be ten minutes at Twilight's expense there.
Best part of the chapter
I don't like Archer... There's something off about him.
Also, I think he has the hots for Twilight.
2627841
Something "off"?
How?
2627930
First there's the shy one, then there's the "I don't give a damn" one, and then there's the "Yay!" guy. Putting in the one that is obviously hostile towards Twilight feels like an attempt to hide the fact that Archer is hiding something.
2626720
As you said this is an adventure story (I hope it will not end soon) so any negative or positive roles can pop up and be gone in less then a chapter since life is not predicable. Archer and/or Silver could be a new chapter in the plot of the story or they might be side characters that only pop up here and there. We need to see what will come in future chapters to know for sure. Archer does not give me any danger vibes so far.
Maybe Archer is destined to die a horrible death in the shield caverns giving Twilight a lesson in life, or he might be used to force Twilight to do something. Silver might just be a stuck up that hates Twi-Luna shipping, or he could be the start of the next big problem on Twilight's hooves.
Mist might be pressured in to not accepting, or she might have lied to Twilight to not get the spot as her new student so her parents/family/pony with ulterior motives cant use her.
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The [Sad] tag has been used a lot ,so I am hoping that it will not need to be used that much in the future, and if she dies in the end its a tragedy not sad tag.
Luna suggested a threesome, this has so much potential it could be a story arc on it one when you combine it with politics, Twilight's emotions and the joke options. I can just imagine the rumor's if for instance a servant/pony passerby overheard Luna mention it and Twilight not saying no .
2627841 your second comment is a good question and can make the threesome plot line work.
2627403
Given that Synthesis magic has just been rediscovered...safe bet.
I dunno if I would say Twi was being a bitch. She's a very busy person now, and this isn't basics she'll be teaching but fairly advanced magic to a person she intends as her replacement down the line.
Archer is obviously one of the bad guys here. The way he asks his questions sets off an internal alarm of suspicion from me. May the possible battle end with him following the mountain's example!
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I actually had to look this one up. The wiki page I found called her Glimmer. But Velvet sounds pretty darn familiar.
I'm gonna take the high road and say either way, the 'Alternate Universe' tag covers it.
-Edit-
I was mistaken all along... Twilight Velvet is Twilight's mother, and Night Light is her father, according to the wiki page.
Given I'm too lazy to go and change it, I'm just going to leave it as-is and say the tag covers it >.>
Besides, I like Glimmer better.
Loved the new chapter, and I'm skeptical about Archer as well. Plus I too think we haven't seen the last of Silver yet…
What bugged me a little was that you had Twilight use the word "anywho", even twice in short succession. It's not a real word, and I feel it's ooc for the (sometimes overly) correct Twilight and her apprehension of correct grammar and spelling…
It's a pretty minor nitpick, but it just caught my eye.
you progress
>your progress
2629043
Fixed. Thank you ^.^
Why is everyone hating on archer? I think Silver is the one to look out for because he is the strongest. and mist gives me the heeby jeebies.
I'm not feeling specific about any of the student candidates, but her taking a student so early and (I assume as of now) not reading too much into Archers learning habits is a bit concerning to me. I feel like something not-so-good is gonna happen student wise, just have no clue what...
Maybe I'm just tired, it is 1 in the morning.
2627403
Yeah, I feel like she's just making him study her way and not figuring out his special way of learning and incorporating that. I feel like simply that will make things go south.
Is it just me or does archer sound kinda depressed about how this is going?
In my mind Twilight had a pretty interactive learning experience under Celestia, and yet how she seems to be teaching Archer is more of an indirect teaching. As in Twilight sets up a curriculum and sends him on his way, where Twilight and Celestia might've had lengthy discussions... it might just be im pinking up Archers thoughts on how this is looking though.
Commence read.
The fluff. Oh man the fluff. This was a much needed break from the serious of the story.
That... that was quite funny. And why Luna was crying... I fear it has to do with her true destiny and all that what-not.
I've found this chapter to be filled with much more comedy than others have. It's quite nice to see. Yep, this chapter was a nice sort of break from the seriousness of the rest of the story. I hope to finish this story soon. I normally read something of this length in about three or four days time, but with heavy college work and... work, it's taken me a considerable amount longer. It was time well spent though. (I'll probably end up repeating that after I finish the story, in my sort of conclusion comment.)
~SolidFire
The painter should have gone with a book for Twilight to focus on, it would definitely get a good expression from her. Plus I'm calling it now, Silver is related to a certain pony sitting in a jail cell lamenting his loss of shadow magic. Something about the "I'd rather stand" just screams to me.
2632055 I know it's been 64 weeks but I thought I'd say that, based on what we've seen from the show, Twilight's teaching him exactly how Celestia taught her, except giving him actual guidance.
I need to teach Twilight the Magic of Friendship! How should I do so? Let her sit in on the classes with other students at my school? Have her go to the mall/market? LOLnope! I'll just wait 'till she's all grown up and send her to get the Elements of Harmony and hope she makes friends at that exact same moment!"
4882696
: What could possibly go wrong?