• Published 25th Sep 2012
  • 5,839 Views, 92 Comments

The Running Shadow... that's also really annoying. - StreakTheFox



An ominous shadow is seen running through ponyville annoying everypony in sight. mainly Rainbow Dash

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Ya know, you remind me of somebody I hate

-Ya know, you remind me of somebody I hate-

Rainbow Dash flew to the library, determined to put an end to things once and for all. Though she had originally planned to be all “yo im da boss and im gonna solo this nubcake,” last night's events finally made her realize she couldn't do things on her own. For it was after she broke into tears and made her way home that she came to realize that only her friends could help her through her sticky situation...

...NO! Not THAT kind of sticky situation you perverts! Good gravy, I'm talking about how she's “stuck” with the shadow. Get it? Course you don't. Wankers...

So, with her jimmies all rustled Rainbow Dash flies to the library, letting herself in through the front door without bothering to knock. She's a mare on a mission, she don't care about such things as “knocking” anymore. So as she entered the library she noticed Twilight Sparkle reading through books like it was her last day alive. But no worries, such a thing really isn't happening (yet), she just saw her friend get beat to a pulp in front of her and was just as dedicated as Rainbow Dash to find out what it was and find a way to stop it.

Obviously Twilight heard her friend come in, so she raised her head up with a worried expression upon her entry. “Rainbow Dash! There you are, are you okay? When I followed you last night you were flying back to your home crying.”

“Yeah, I'm fine,” Dash grumbled as she set down next to the unicorn. “And I wasn't crying, I was just, well, not feeling to good okay?” She was totally bawling over her hurt pride.

Aww... don't be such a baby Rainbow Dash, pride grows back! No it doesn't!

Anyways, Twilight wasn't buying it, but she decided to let it go for now. “Well, I'm glad you decided to come, I've been up ever since you busted – literally I might add – and I've been trying to see if I have anything in my books on this 'shadow' deal...” Twilight flipped closed the book she had open in front of her and sighed miserably. “So far I've found nothing.”

“We don't need your books for this Twilight,” Rainbow Dash said as she strutted up to her friend all determined like. It's like she was Arnold Schartsiwhatshisface when he figured out on the Predator movie that he had to kill the alien by himself. “I'm putting my hoof down, we need to get all six of us here to stop this guy!”

“You mean gather up the other element bearers?” No Twilight, she means getting the three stooges and Don Knotts assembled with you two in the library. Jesus...

“That's right. Whatever this guy is, I know that the six of us combined will be able to stop him together!”

“Wow, that's a really good idea, Rainbow Dash!” Rainbow Dash? Having a good idea!? Stop the god damn presses!

“I know, right? As long as we work together as a team, then we can finally take down this annoying shadow once and for all!”

“Yeah!” Twilight cheered.

“Yeah!” Rainbow cheered too.

“Yeah!” Spike joined in.

“Whoo!” Owlowicious... apparently cheered as well.

“Tweet!” ...oh hey, there's Peewee!

“Ragle fragle!” and that weird Sasquatch monster from Billy and Many? Da'fuk?

Dude, that thing just jumped out from the basement, grabbed Spike, and then hauled ass out the window. Spike was screaming all “aaah! Help!” and everyone else just did nothing. Seriously, the frik is wrong with these ponies?

Okay, okay, so getting back on track. The group first heads over to Sweet Apple Acres to recruit Applejack, right? Well they find her in her apple orchard bucking trees and such, that's all going dandy and stuff until...

“So let me get this straight,” Applejack attempted to clarify what her southern hick brain could not comprehend so easily. Darn tootin. “Y'all want me ta help you catch, and probably beat the buck out of, some sort of runnin' bipedal shadow thing?”

“Yes, especially the beat the buck out of part!” Rainbow Dash emphasized. “That thing seriously has it coming to him, trust me.”

“Well first of all, what in the hay is it?” Oh feeble-minded Applejack, don't worry, the one with a head as smart as an egg is almost just as dumb as you are!

“That's what we're still trying to figure out,” said egg-head replied. “I got a good look at it, and so did Rainbow-”

“-A VERY good look! Especially when it decided to use me as some sort of ring-around-the-rosy partner and fling me straight into the garbage of a fast food restaurant! I was smelling like rotten hay fries and over-ripened tomatoes for three days after that! Three days!”

“...Right, well, we've both gotten a good look at it, but we really don't know what it is yet. And right now it's been terrorizing Rainbow Dash for the past few days, and she really needs some help to catch it.”

“Yeah...” Rainbow Dash sighes as she crossed her hooves. “It's totally cheating though, using its crazy drinks and gadgets and fish and... stuff.”

“Well have you tried talkin to it?” Applejack asked.

“Yeah, I did, the first day I met the thing! But all it did was start crying and then the next thing I know, it tries to use me as a baseball!” Rainbow Dash leaned uncomfortably close to Applejack at this. “It DID use me as a baseball!”

“okay, okay! I can see why ya wanna beat it up now, I guess.” Applejack took a defensive step backwards. “But still, it ain't makin sense. Why would it start crying and then just go after ya Dash?”

“Hey, I wasn't crying!”

Woah, hey, I'm just as surprised as you are at this! (not really) So they all get startled and turn to see the shadow up on one of the tree branches right next to them. At first Rainbow Dash got angry, obviously, with the focal point of all her hate being right there. But then she gets even more pissed when she sees a familiar blue blanket and pillow draped over the thing.

“HEY! My napping stuff!”

“What, you mean this?” The shadow asked as it raised up her pillow in one hand and the blanket in the other. “Yeah, pretty neat setup ya got here. Thought I would use it to take a little nap myself, seeing as your liked to do it in a pile of hay ya filthy horse.”

“Hey now, there ain't no need to be insultin anypony 'round here!” Applejack demanded as she stomped her hoof, obviously realizing that there was good reason to be hating on that fool of a dark figure. “Now y'all better come down here and apologize for what ya done!”

“Woah woah woah, wait a second,” The shadow seemed to be on the verge of a fit of laughter. “Say something again.”

“H-huh?” Applejack cocked her head.

“Do it, c'mon, just say somethin one more time!”

“...What in tarnation are ya talkin about!? Why would you want me to just keep talkin an-”

Applejack was rudely interrupted as the shadow was rudely laughing at her while rudely clinging onto Rainbow Dash's rudely placed sleeping stuff... in a rude way.

“Ahahahaha! Oh man, that is too much!” The shadow dropped the pillow, but held onto the blanket as it swung down off the branch and landed right in front of the farmer pony, leaning down to talk to her. “Ya know, you remind me of somebody I hate. Not cuz he's a jerk or nuthin, but he keeps trying to tell me to do this or that,” it leaned uncomfortably close to her, similar to how Rainbow Dash did. “Just like you do... ya reckon, partner?” The shadow snerked at its use of mockery, and then just laughed in her face.

“Alright, that's it!” Rainbow Dash lunged forward and, miraculously, got a hold of the thing with her hoofed on the cloth just below its neck. “You're gonna pay for making me look like a fool, and for being a smart-ass to me and my friends!”

“That's right!” Twilight added in, getting her face up close to the shadow's as well. “You've got a lot to explain for everything you've done. I don't care if hitting my assistant over the head with a rolled up newspaper didn't hurt, it's still rude and degrading!”

“An now I can see why y'all wanted to take this thing down!” she brought her face up as well, but got the attention of the shadow more than the others as it stared at her through those dark eye holes. As if to savor the moment, she smirked and tipped her hat back a bit, deciding to mock it in return. “...Ya reckon, partner?”

“Uhh...” the shadow looked at the three faces glaring at it. “Okay, this is not looking good here, um-”

“What's the matter, run out of tricks?” Rainbow Dash glared at it with a wicked, satisfied grin. “It's about time! Now I can beat your flank to a pulp!”

Uh oh, looks like Rainbow Dash is gonna finally hit it! There she goes, raising up her hoof for the swing, oh man, hear it comes....

SPLASH!

“What the hay!?” apparently, Rainbow Dash didn't expect the shadow to bring up a bottle of milk and splash it all over her. Neither of her friends did either, it seems, as they all got splash too as it pulled away from Dash's grip.

“Drink it in pal, that's how failure tastes!” The shadow teased as it slung the bottle around again, pouring the remainder of the milk on the three. “Look like it's nap time for the baby pony gang.” Okay, I thought the shenanigans of the shadow were pretty funny till now, however I do not endorse it grabbing up that pillow and ripping it open. Poor pillow...

...I DO however endorse the shadow flinging feathers all over them, thus making them all look like Scootaloos.

“Ah, jeez!” Rainbow Dash spat a few feathers out of her mouth as she flailed her hooves around.

“Aaah!” Twilight screamed like a namby pamby pony princess's student would.

“Land sakes!” Came Applejack's surprised yelp as she was met with the same fate as her friends. Oh, woe is them...

“There, now you can all share the same pillow, hahah!” it then flung the blanket over and on top of the three ponies, blinding them long enough for it to start running away to freedom. “Have a nice nap, losers!”

With the shadow running off, the three ponies do their best to get the blanket and the feathers off of them, while at the same time spitting out the bits that did get into their mouths.

“Ptew, ptew, Rainbow!?” Applejack spoke began as she looked at her friend with an glare. “Get mah rope!”

---

“A running shadow? Darlings, that sounds completely preposterous!” Rarity claimed to her three friends staring at her with dead serious expressions. “Is this some sort of joke?”

“It ain't no joke, Rarity,” Applejack replied. “We got ourselves a big problem with this thing. Dash here's had it the worst, but so far all I've seen comin from it ain't nothin but trouble and lots'ah wasted milk!” of course the farmer would cry over spilled milk...

“It just randomly showed up at my house at night, too, and it assaulted both me and Spike!”

“It even hurt Spikey wikey!?” Good job Rarity! Way to show concern for your friends over the future set of boots that just hawks over you any chance it gets. “Why, that is unacceptable! I will have none of any sort of “shadow” hurting any of my friends.”

“So does that mean you're in?” Rainbow Dash asked, full of hope.

“Certainly! Let me just get some of my supplies so that I can help you with-” Rarity stopped, dead in her tracks. She was turning around to get a few things gathered that she thought might help, as well as some beauty products in case her mane or coat got dirty (damn prep), but it was at that time she saw some strange thing covered in a black cloth pulling over one of her dresses she had on a mannequin (or ponequin or... whatever) and drape it around itself. Her jaw dropped as she watched it twirl around with one of her best works crudely draped around its covered body.

“Hah! Hey, look at me mah!” the shadow said as it waved at the mirror that was right next to it.

“You!” Rarirty shouted as she pointed her hoof at the fashion offender. “Get your filthy arms off of my dress!”

So of course, naturally, the three others turned to see what she was griping about, and they were also able to see the spectacle that was the shadow playing with a dress.

“”Hehe, hey ya got some pretty neato stuff here. Oh look a hat!” it dropped the dress as it ran over and plucked a very stylish purple hat that was merely a half-circle bowl of thick silk and encrusted with multiple gems and diamonds that was sitting on top of another ponequin, setting it on its own head.. “Sweet.”

“That's it right there!” Dash claimed with a shout of her own before speeding after it. She tried to tackle the thing again, but the shadow sidestepped her comically, letting her fly straight into a cluttered closet.

“Hah, too slow.” The scout reached under its cloak for something, and then brought out an apple. “Hey aren't you that one horse that sounds like the engineer?”

“The what?” Applejack asked, having seen the shadow's question directed at her. “Who's the engineer? And what the hay are ya doin with one of mah apples!?” Uh oh, messing with AJ's apples, now she's pissed.

“Oh I just got an idea of what to use this thing for back at yer run-down orchard.” It brought out its wooden bat with its other hand as it began to toss the apple up and catch it in its hand over and over. “Ya ready for this ya southern hick?”

“Look out!” Rainbow Dash warned as she poked her head out of the closet, covered with all sorts of cloth, string, and a lamp cover. “He's gonna hit you with it like a baseball!”

“...Woah woah woah, wait a second, am I getting that predicable now?” The shadow asked as it turned to Rainbow Dash. “Nah nah nah that won't do. How about...” it looked over, seeing a roll of thread on a desk. “Aha!” It put the apple back under its cloak, grabbed the roll, and then hit it with its bad to the other side of the boutique.

“Hey! That's a very expensive roll of thread!” Rarity protested before she had to duck her head from the roll flying right over her, leaving a trail behind it. The thread bounced off the wall, and then off another wall, and then went back to the shadow before he again hit it with his bat. This repeated several times over until Rainbow Dash got tired of watching it.

“Okay, time to stop this!” she said as she launched herself out of the closet, only to get tangled up by threads hanging in the air. “What!? What is this!?”

“Hey ya finally figure it out yet?” the shadow teased as he hit the half-unrolled spool of thread again, then lifted up his hand that was originally holding the apple, only to show it had the end of the thread caught between two of its fingers.

“It's made a thread barrier by hitting it around the room!” Twilight announced as she looked around. All the ponequins, the desks, the sewing machines and everything decorating or taking up space had thread strung around it from the spool being hit around everywhere, effectively ensnaring everything.

Finally, after what seemed to be an endless amount, the spool ran out, and the shadow put the baseball bat away. That left the shadow completely trapped in the middle of the boutique... right? Wrong.

“Well, good luck trying to get out a this one!” it said as it pulled a yellow can out from under the cloak, popped it open, and then drank just a bit of its contents. Just as it did the night before, it had blurry movements all around it, but this time was able to simply run through all the threads around the room like they didn't even exist. “Wananununun....”

With a hop, a skip, and a leap it jumped out the window that it had apparently used to get in with in the first place, leaving the four confused and frustrated ponies left inside.

“H-he ruined my thread... and my boutique... and...” Rarity, on the verge of tears, had a complete switch of emotions. She glared at the window, infuriated by the recently intruder and what it had done.

“Uh, so, are ya gonna help us now or what?” Rainbow Dash asked in an unamused voice.

“Oh, it. Is. On...”

---

So where would the now four ponies head next, you might ask? Why, to Sugarcube Corner of course! They would head to Fluttershy's place first, ya know, because the shadow would probably scare the living daylights out of her and all if it showed up first, but Sugarcube Corner was on the way sooo...

...They get there first. And they head inside and all, yeah, but they didn't expect Pinkie Pie to be decorating the walls with essentially all the cakes, cupcakes, danishes and every other pastry available. Ya know, I take that back, she's not decorating the walls, she's just trying really hard and failing at hitting the shadow that's in the middle of taunting her in there.

“What the crap are you throwing cake at me for ya loon!?” the shadow asks as he narrowly avoids a muffin hitting his head, which instead flies out the window and hits an orange and yellow mare square in the face.

“Pinkie Pie, what are you doing!?” Twilight calls out to her friend who is currently perched on top of a cabinet that's less than half full with cakes. Ya know Twilight, you're seriously getting dumber and dumber as the story goes along. I hate to say it, but maybe having an egg for a head isn't one of the best things in the world.

“What does it look like I'm doin!?” Pinkie Pie replies with a glare and a lot of shouting. “I'm assaulting him with cake! This meany meaner pants comes in and starts insulting me, the Cakes, all my pastries, AND he takes a cupcake without asking!” Pinkie finishes her sentence with throwing a pound cake at the shadow, who ducks to avoid getting hit.

“This is a real freakin embarrassment,” the shadow says as leans left and right, ready to dodge the next confection. “I can't believe I'm being attacked by a pink pony who uses frosting and lots of colors to attack people.” He dodges another cake. “Ya know, you remind me of another guy I know, and I hate him too!”

“Get'im Pinkie Pie!” Rainbow Dash cheered as she watched the shadow almost get his again, this time with a pie.

“I'm trying!” She said as she reached down, pulling up two more cakes. The shadow, however, was done playing. It jumped up to Pinkie, dodging the first cake, and then grabbed her hoof that still held the other cake while it stared her in the eyes.

“Okay, repeat after me, Mmm-mmm-mm-I'm dumb!” at that, the shadow forced Pinkie's hoof with the cake back at her, splattering the cake in her face.

Pinkie fell backwards dramatically, falling off the cabinet in slow motion going “noooooooooooooo-” and stuff before falling into a pile of ruined pastries on the floor.

“Pinkie Pie!” The collective group cried out after seeing their dear party friend defeated.

“Mmmm mm mmmm...” came Pinkie's reply as she tried to talk through the cake that was partially stuffed into her mouth.

“Eat it ya cake throwin moron!” the shadow yelled before jumping off the cabinet and making its way to the window. “Nice hustle tons-of-fun, next time try a salad!” after that, it jumps out of the window that the muffin had flown out of earlier, dashing away from the four ponies who tried to catch him after Pinkie fell.

“He got away, again!” Rainbow Dash cursed under her breath as she watched him run off. “We gotta stop him, before he does something really terrible!”

“Hold up a second, is it me, or are y'all seein a pattern here?” Applejack asked.

“What do you mean?” of course you would have no freakin clue Twilight. Yeesh...

“Well, first you an Dash come to get me, and the shadow's there, then he appears when we're getting Rarity, THEN it's already here at Sugarcube Corner when we're trying to gather up Pinkie Pie, so...”

Rarity gasped. “Oh no, you can't mean-”

“It's gonna get Fluttershy!” Pinkie Pie cried out after swallowing the cake that was in her mouth. “Everypony quick, we gotta stop it!”

With that, they all ran out of the shop and down the street, passing a pair of ponies wrestling on the ground.

“D-derpy!” Carrot Top cried out. “Stop licking my face, please!”

“Muffin!”

….Hah.

---

So, the group of five finally make it to Fluttershy's house. How the shadow keeps popping up where they're going to next, I dunno. Probably has something to do with Cragle's cousin or... something. Anyways, they get there, and they group up at the door as Twilight knocks on it.

“Fluttershy? Are you in there?”

No response.

Twilight knocks again. “Fluttershy?”

A few soft voices are heard inside, and then the door swings open fully, revealing Fluttershy with a soft smile on her face.

“Oh, hello girls, it's so nice to see you all here.”

“I, um, yes... is, is everything alright in there?” Twilight asks. Gee, does it LOOK like everything's alright in there!? Because judging from her expression it seems like-calm down... Calm down...

“Oh, why, of course it is. Why do you ask?” Fluttershy tilts her head, a moderately concerned look on her face.

“Because we think there's some evil meany shadowy creature coming to get you!” Pinkie yells out while throwing her hooves in the air, making a scene. Wow, the shadow was right about Pinkie... she is dumb.

“W-w-what?” Fluttershy takes a step back, fear overcoming her expression.

“Don't worry sugarcube, we're here to keep that thing from hurtin ya, and ta catch it as well,” Applejack declared.

“That's right, darling, we simply cannot allow it to continue making a ruckus throughout Ponyville, so we're here to ask for your help.”

“B-but, why would you need my help? I mean, surely you don't need all the elements for this... do you?”

“Well, not exactly,” Twilight begins. “We just figured you might be good with talking to it. As far as we know it's something hiding under a black cloth, and we're sure it's not any sort of pony or anything else we know.”

“Really?” Fluttershy asks, gaining more interest in the supposed wild animal.

“Yeah, I mean the dang thing doesn't even have fur!” Rainbow Dash exclaims. “It's all skin so no scales, no fur anywhere I've seen so far, walks on two legs, has two arms with fingers, and like Twilight said it wears a freakin cloth over itself to keep it concealed. That bucking coward, why I oughta pull that cloth off and just-”

“But I already convinced him to take the cloth off,” Fluttershy interrupted.

“At any rate, Fluttershy, do you think you can help us find and-wait, what?” Twilight paused, giving Fluttershy a confused look, as did the other four with her. “What do you mean you already convinced it to take its cloth off?”

...I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna make the shadow beat on her head till it hits tonsils if she keeps acting so stupid.

“Oh, well, the creature you described already came here, and at first I was afraid of him and all, but then he started acting so sweet. I think he was just scared and needed some loving care.” Fluttershy turned around and smiled sweetly at the bipedal creature that just happened to be walking by, chomping on a sandwhich without its cloak over it. “Isn't that right, Scout?”

“Sure is, Fluttershy,” The 'Scout' replies as he takes another bite, before suddenly stopping in his tracks and slowly turning his head towards the door.

Can ya hear that? It's the sound of nothing... absolutely nothing. Because for what seemed like forever, everypony stood there in silence, with the five at Fluttershy's door staring at the Scout with mixed looks of anger, confusion, bewilderment, and irritation, while the Scout stares back with one of those 'oh shit I'm gonna die' looks, and Fluttershy is looking back and forth between the two parties, not having a flying buck what's going on.

From what the ponies could see, the shadow wasn't entirely hairless. It was bald all along its face and across its arms, sure, but it had some hair on the top of its head which was mostly covered up by the hat it had acquired from Rarity's boutique. Every other part of it was covered, however, by the clothes it wore on its body. His clothes were... you know, I could bore you with the description, but I'm just gonna cut that short right now and tell ya it's the BLU scout. M'kay? M'kay.

So, who's gonna break the silence, hm? Anybody wanna bet? Just like the first chapter, it's twenty bucks! Who is it, Dash? Fluttershy? Pinkie? The Scout? Anybody? Alright... here we go!

A few of the ponies manage to blink, but that's as far as they get in their silence before the former shadow manages to break the ice.

“...Um-”

“GET HIM!”




P.S. Anyone who didn't bet on Scout owes me twenty bucks. Anybody who did... well, kudos.

Comments ( 52 )

Oh shit. Scouts so dead.

...Scout, you done goofed.

harr harr harr

-wargod

You sir, are a certified genius. :pinkiehappy:

Damn, i thought it was the RED scout.:ajbemused:

Oh... shit. RUN, SCOUT, RUN! RUN UNTILL CELESTIA HERSELF COMES OVER AND BEATS YOUR FLANK!

and then they all fucked. the end:trollestia:

I BET ALL PONYS BECAUSE THEY CHOIR!!! *wins 20 bucks* Eh eh eh~:rainbowkiss:

Shit i bet on Rainbow -sigh- take my bucks:applejackunsure:

RUN SCOUT RUUUUUUN:pinkiehappy:

“Ragle fragle!” and that weird Sasquatch monster from Billy and Many? Da'fuk?
Dude, that thing just jumped out from the basement, grabbed Spike, and then hauled ass out the window. Spike was screaming all “aaah! Help!” and everyone else just did nothing. Seriously, the frik is wrong with these ponies?

You an I are now friends :rainbowlaugh:

'You fucked up!'
Abraham Lincoln

Scout is totally going to do something crazy. Or Fluttershy will stop them.

Always the generic BLU scout...
Oh well good story, Streak. :pinkiehappy:

Mad Milk, Billy and Mandy, Fluttershy, but no requests for dispencers? This chapter was almost perfect.

1406014
I knew i was forgetting something!

1406863 Half the time I was just thinking "sayitsayitsayitsayitsayit!"

Please pass the egg salad :3

i wonder when is the next chapter

I wonder if the Scout will find out Spike breathes fire and suddenly develops a fear o--

WHOOPS DID I JUST THINK THAT SPIKE WOULD PLAY ANY PART IN THIS STORY SILLY ME

RED scout master race

aaand... when do they fuck?

Calling Scout's first line in the next chapter:
"I regret everything! Everything I've ever done!"

This is the funniest story ever. of all time.

i was bettin on derpy

1753467
Don't advertise other fics on the comments of other people's fics. :trixieshiftleft:

Wanananaanna....

1756161 Please... continue. So funny.

1756161
Hey, I haven't even written a tic. Don't hate what you cant prove. I just like derpy.

Dammit, just found this story. Please continue soon. :twilightsmile:

More!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::fluttershbad:

Little little man is in for it :yay:

*coughs* *coughs* new chapter? *coughs*

SCOUT

WAT R U DOIN

SCOUT

KEEP GOIN

Needs...new...chapter...if not continued...must finish myself...:pinkiecrazy:

Has this been cancelled? It's been over a year so... :fluttershysad:

Comment posted by The Pyromanecer deleted Mar 27th, 2014

What happed to this ficc??? Plz update , or I will be off to visit your mother!!

I bet on fluttershy:fluttercry:

(you might want to go fullscreen)

3865212 Nah, just hiatus

This is by FAR the best fiction ive read in a long time. Thank you for making me smile repetitively for weeks on end :trollestia:

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