RubyDubious
Joined 21st Mar, 2019 ·
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You forgot to remove that
I liked it, kinda dark but not exactly horror. Very touching in the end, though.
10964721
OH MY GOD THANK YOU!!!! Somehow I missed that on my once over before publishing!
I'm glad you enjoyed it though!! I was definitely going for something bittersweet, but it seems I fell a little short with making it horrifying. Then again, I wasn't really going for something nightmarish as much as I was eerie! Again, thank you!
Oh, in that case thriller may be the better tag!
Awww I loved this. I'm glad it had a happy ending
A powerful and moving story. I'm glad it had a happy ending. Good to see you phblishing again, Ruby. Excellent work.
This was a lot more uplifting than I thought it would be based on the tagging and introduction.
Nice.
Okay, I gotta ask..... did you draw any inspiration from The Color Out of Space?
10966830
Oh I've never heard of that story before, but it could be worth looking into!
The inspiration for this story came to me when I was at work and I somehow got the image of a sickly, dead tree in my head. At the same time, I had the line, "I hear a song of death and decay growing quieter with each chorus," stuck in my head. And at the same time as that I'd always wanted to make a story where Applejack communed with her dead parents. Then boom two and two added themselves together. I went through a few ideas before settling on what's published.
But to circle around and answer your question, nope! Inspiration sometimes comes from the strangest places. Sometimes you see something out in your day and it inspires you, sometimes it strikes you from a phrase, and sometimes it's plucked from a feeling. It's magical, really!
Are you also going to write stories titled War, Famine and/or Death?
Pestilence? More like Perseverance with how stubborn AJ is! Now this was a great, gutsy AJ story. Everyone was able to come across strongly in this grittier look into the mundane side of the mirror. The message was also one that was well-worth the read to see how she learned a hard lesson in the end.
This fic touched a note with me that I didn't even realize until the end. It's a good moral, don't give up. Even if everything is against you.
I'm trying to figure out how to start this off, but I can't. I don't know how. For the first fanfiction, or piece of literature for that matter, that I've read in months, this was probably one of the best things I could have chosen.
That's because, well, it resonated with me. I felt it. And, aside from that, it reminded me... well... of a few things you told me. I'll tell you about those in private.
Applejack is a character I have a good deal of respect for. She's dependable, sticks to her guns, and speaks her mind. She's the responsible one, making sure that everything is working properly. As a farmer, she's early to rise, her work continuing throughout the day until finally returning to the cottage to rest in preparation for the rest of the day. She's proud of who she is, of her legacy, of everything their family does. And, most important of all, she's humble enough to admit her mistakes when she's proven wrong. She grows and changes, and adapts.
This is what happens when you take Applejack and put her into a situation where everything is going wrong. The farm is failing. Their main source of income is dead and withered, and AJ doesn't know why. Where normally she had three hands to help, and Granny besides, she is almost totally alone. Granny is gone. Big Mac had no choice but to take a factory job for their biggest competitor and rival. The only person who seems to be having success is Applebloom, who's away with college -- and who's to say how well she's actually doing?
Everything that Applejack has tried to do has just been... failure. Nothing works. The best she can do is stave off the inevitable, cutting back everything she can in the hopes that maybe, just maybe, there's gonna be a miracle. Maybe her hard work is gonna pay off at just the right moment. Maybe she's telling herself that, if she wasn't been so stupid, then things would have already worked out. Maybe... she thinks that punishing herself for her failure will make things right, somehow. Maybe she thinks that they were right about her... just a stupid fucking country bimbo who doesn't know when she's beaten.
But then she finds out the truth. Bad water. Something so simple, so small. She's the one in charge she's the responsible one, how could she have been so stupid? The one thing she didn't think to check...
And water, right? The one thing she should have been able to trust. A piece of the family legacy, a well dug to keep them constsntly supplied with fresh, clean, free water. The one thing that all life needed to survive. All creatures, be they man or beast or Flora, drank from that well.
That water was supposed to be reliable. Dependable. Like Applejack. It was supposed to make sure everything flourished. She was supposed to make sure everything flourished.
But there was no way she could have known.
It happened. It screwed everything up, and everything she knew is in fucking pieces because of something she couldn't control.
It happened. And now? She knew what was wrong, and what had to be done to fix it. She knows it won't be easy.
It happened. Even though it all seemed impossible, now she's gonna make things work.
Because that's the Apple Family way.
I put this story on my to read list. When I got around to it, I noticed the Equestria Girls tag and became upset. (I don't read those because I've never seen it.) I really wanted to read this one so I did it anyway and I'm glad I did. I was basically hooked from the first sentence.
I like that much of the story isn't specifically about the farm itself in a monetary/livelihood sense but the memories attached to it. It's like, losing the fruit is bad but losing the tree itself is what hurts the worst. My favorite detail is Applejack adopting a vice and then somehow remaining monetarily responsible enough to downgrade it as things get tougher and she's probably on her way to drinking the rubbing alcohol out of the medicine cabinet.
My mind goes there so maybe it's just me but I thought the direction you were going with this story wasApplejack was tired of caring for granny so she offed her and stupidly hid her in the well. Then the farm becoming tainted through the water was basically karma or revenge from beyond the grave. Obviously that would require tweaking, maybe an unreliable narrator. Me being in that mindset though gave her parents' questions an accusatory tone instead of a reassuring one.
I love the ending being 'I don't know what I'm going to do but I'm not giving up.' Boil the water I guess... Good story.
11186037
Apologies for a late reply, I didn't get a chance to see this until I got off work! While I like where your head's at, it's much darker than what I had intended! Granny had dies of natural causes, and a diseased bat or some other kind of ill animal fell in the well water supply and drowned, causing it to taint all the water and make it kill off the farm animals and trees that lived off it. In a way, the farm itself started dying when the water went bad! At any rate, I'd love to discuss this further with you, but I'm very glad you liked it!! Thank you for reading!
Hello there!
I noticed here's a chinese transaltion,but the English version is no longer available at Fimtale. That means the Chinese translation to which the hyperlink points is now unavailable.
You could just remove the "/en" from the Chinese Translation website address, making it https://fimtale.com/t/27564, and then it will work.
And have a nice day!