• Member Since 7th Aug, 2013
  • offline last seen Aug 1st, 2023

EdBoii


Getting my ass kicked one day at a time.

Comments ( 29 )

This... this seems really interesting

So from what I can gather, this takes place in an alternate universe where Cozy Glow was successful in removing magic from Equestria during the events of "School Raze". Or am I wrong in that?

10450392
Cool! I've always wanted a fanfic on that specific scenario.

I look forward into seeing more of this

Are Celestia and Luna still a thing? And it is amusing to see how remarkably reliant they are on magic?

Ps. If there is no magic would cutie marks not work?

Some talk of Alexander and some of Hercules,
of Hector and Lysander, and such great names as these.
But of all the world's great heroes there's none that can compare
to the Tow Row Row Row Row of the British Grenadiers

I dislike the disabled voting, but we will see

10451245
It's not disabled, but it's not showing up atm. Currently it's 4 to 1 likes/dislikes.


10450589
They're a thing! The cutie mark bit will be answered soon. :3

Why isn't there a Cozy Glow tag? Also, I'm surprised that the main character isn't named Afterglow.

10452863
Afterglow is a play on Cozy's name! The story takes place after Cozy Glow does the thing. :coolphoto: She's not an active part of the story, just the setting, so I didn't think it right to add a tag for her.

What a amazing fanfic I like it 10/10

I am ok with cutie marks no matter how Amazing struck me as rather insidous for ya know? Oh look its mark that ensures you never change bound in life to a single action or idea!

But, wait the risk of someone saying well those griffins dont have cutie marks. Well, they are less than!

So Ponies are the invaders also cool with this. I actually always felt their soceity is rather creepy when think about it. I mean someone raises the fucking sun? And Im sure ponys dont favor ponys...

Lastly, Im not going to lie this was amazing! Grammar, story first flush holly shit we might be monster! You are cough cough.

I also am not thrilled that ponie might win? Im mean ounce again pony life before was creepy rather insidous and now?

Now? They get live like everyone else? And...that is a Good thing.

Thank you again for lovely chappie! You are marvelous! I also appreciate that you arent worshipping death here! Rather what is horrible evil and in many way profoundly hopeful? Perhaps?

Thank you ounce again. Have a kind day!

10453028
10453413
Really glad you guys enjoyed it! Thanks for your comments :3

Hope this isn’t dead like all the other good war stories. Will wait as long as it takes for another chap.

10591524
Not dead, I've just lost a bit of steam after the quiet reception it had. :ajsleepy: I'm finishing another story at the moment, and after that I'll decide how to move forward with Afterglow.

It won't be abandoned tho, that's for sure.

Kaj

I really enjoyed the story so far. I hope you keep updating it. If you are lost where to go you could always explain what happened when the magic started to fade. Delve into how the townsfolk of equestrian acted when it occurred, the initial draft or recruitment of the soldiers. Maybe touch on how first unicorn magic faded then pegasus magic and finally earth pony magic. There is always basic training for the musketeers and their first experiences with muskets.
While I understand the towns rebelled because of Griffins colonizing you could delve deeper into the motives there as well.
Combat isn't the only part of war. It makes up just a brief moment of day or month. You could also hit on the minding numbing nature of a long march. The weight of a ruck on your shoulders and a rifle in hand. The ache of your feet " hooves", the constant sun scorching you or the relentless rain. The way a cannon gets stuck in the mud and requires pony's to lay branches and hay in front to get traction.

You did an amazing job by the way of capturing the method of the new army of the dutch. That might not be what you are going after but the ponies laying down a volley then having to go back to the end and reload. Was just lovely. The cacophony of artillery was also well played, not to mention just the casualness you stated earthworks and siege lines. Don't forget the ponies can also dig saps or tunnels of their own.

I truly enjoyed the story so please don't take what I said as criticisms or anything of the sort. I just want you to get the writing rhythm back for this story.

10791072
Thanks a ton for your comment! I really appreciate you taking the time to share your thoughts. :twilightsmile: Don't worry, the story will continue soon enough. I'm just wrapping up some real life stuff on my end, but that should be over relatively quick. I'm pretty sure I should be back in business sometime around mid-May!

Gosh, that on-hiatus tag bugs me something fierce. I love finding a mature story on this site that isn't just porn. This one ended up being quite the little gem: a polished military romp in an exciting victorious villain AU. The cast of OCs are well-realized from the start, and I'm only let down by the fact that there are three chapters up so far. I hope all is well on your end, author. Stories like these don't garner as much attention as most others of the rating, or of the genre tags in general, but they're worth pushing through until the very end. I'd love to see what else you have planned.

10995173
Thanks! All's well, I just got busy with other projects and university, but I will come back and finish this one. I just got caught in a bit of a block and I'm trying to build some distance to reassess it with fresh eyes.

10995824

I just got busy with other projects and university

Dude, saaaame. It doesn't help that I snagged the majors most likely to distract me from writing horsewords.

10995826
Straight up πŸ˜”πŸ˜”πŸ˜” Hopefully the holidays gimme that sweet, sweet leisure time to dump into pony.

10997115

Straight up

Is this the struggle of a fellow humanities major I'm detecting?

And yeah, tell me about it. Break is only a break from the work without horses.

10997213
You know it, my dude. πŸ˜ŽπŸ‘ History major all the waaay! πŸ—Ώβ³ It's low-key great for worldbuilding.

10997230
An extremely based choice. I'm so used to STEM major this and STEM major that. I'm English and Philosophy, 'cause sticking with one just wouldn't cut it.

10997488
Heck yas! There's too many of those 'hard science' nerds, 😀 when what this world really needs is more of us soft science nerds instead!

πŸ”¬πŸ€“ < πŸ’ͺπŸ˜ŽπŸ“œ

10998786
Their weakness: anything without le numbers and chemicals, interesting conversation topics, actually bearable citation formatting

Sole weakness of every humanities major: crying about the library of Alexandria in the shower

10998815
>The library of Alexandria

WE COULD HAVE BEEN TO SPACE! :raritydespair:

10998879
space legion when

Login or register to comment