Pitfall
Friendship is G.I.
Chapter 8: Pitfall
by Jonathan “KnightMysterio” Spires
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The Pit…
Primary Dojo...
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“What the hell… is something happening?” Bushido said, the white and blue-clad ninja cleaning one his kamas when he heard the alarms going off. Around him, the other ninjas were all gathered, sparring with one another or maintaining their weapons. Early morning was unofficially the time when the main martial arts training facility belonged solely to the ninjas under Snake-Eyes’ command, for their own personal training. With Snake-Eyes gone, and Scarlett having other duties, the disciples were all under the care of the eldest ninja there, Dojo.
Kamakura, the youngest student there, looked worried. “Are we under attack?” the black-masked, green-clad ninja asked.
“Hush,” Dojo said, the blue and yellow-clad ninja listening carefully. He turned to Jinx, the red-clad kunoichi’s eyes widening. “What do you hear?”
Jinx, who had been training her hearing to match her cousin Storm Shadow’s, quickly went for her katana. “Gunfire. We are under attack!”
“Damn it, father,” Billy muttered. “What are you up to?”
“Geez,” Banzai said, the bare-chested, purple-masked ninja said as he grabbed his sai. “When did the snakes get some balls?”
“Save it for when you’re putting knives in necks,” Dojo said. “Let’s move out, Joes!” He grabbed the door to the dojo… and found it locked. “What the…”
“Locked?” Kamakura asked.
Dojo fiddled with the latch, and slammed his shoulder against it. “Jammed, it feels like,” he said. “Roof exits, now!”
The ninjas immediately did as they were told, climbing the pad and bar-laden walls like colorful spiders to get to the roof hatches. Once in the roof, they would crawl through the vents to get out of the room and escape. When they did, however…
“What the HELL!?” called out Bushido.
“Even the vents are sealed shut!” Banzai called out.
Dojo frowned. “HOW!? We were using them just yesterday! For someone to have blocked them off, they had to have done them last night, knowing we’d all be in here…” A horrified thought occurred to him. “Traitors. We have traitors in our midst.”
The other ninjas all look shocked at that. “We’d have noticed,” Nunchuck insisted, the camo-painted martial artist said, coughing.
“Except we didn’t,” Dojo admonished. “We have to-” He began coughing. “What is…”
“GAS!” Jinx said, coughing.
“Find the source!” Dojo ordered, coughing. He could feel himself getting dizzy. “Block it off! T’Jbang, help me break down the door!”
The silent, yellow-clad warrior nodded, coughing and aiding Dojo as they slammed into the door over and over again, trying to remove the jam in the way. But the invisible gas grew more and more intense, and one by one, the ninjas fell unconscious. Dojo, just before he fainted, heard a voice outside the blockaded door.
“Don’t worry,” the voice said. “You’ll live. The Commander wants you humiliated this time, not destroyed.” Dojo looked out the door just before he fainted, and saw the smirking face of Zandar through the door’s window…
Zandar ran a hand through his short red hair, silently glad the ninjas were down. He thought the Commander was foolish for leaving them alive, especially his traitorous son. But then again, the Commander was making many decisions that were risky as of late. Zandar ran a hand over the healed over knife would in his neck where he had…
Wait.
“Snake-Eyes is in the other world. Storm Shadow is ours. Scarlett is elsewhere…” he said, counting the unconscious ninjas in the dojo. “So that’s Jinx, Kamakura, Tiger Claw, Dojo, Nunchuck, T’Jbang, Banzai, Bushido, the commander’s treacherous son, …” He realized one of the ninjas was missing. “Damn it! Where is…”
He just barely managed to dodge out of the way of the thrown potato peeler, which embedded itself in the wall near him. “Looking for me?” called a voice. Zandar turned, and saw the last ninja, clad in white with a red mask and belt, wielding a butcher knife and a meat cleaver, a sash filled with hastily placed kitchen knives over his chest and a cast-iron skillet tied to his belt
“T’Gin-Zu,” Zandar cursed. “Where have you been?”
“Fortunately, and I cannot believe I am saying that and meaning it, I was on KP duty,” the ninja said, twirling his improvised weapons and taking a stance. “Where is sensei Storm Shadow? Why is Cobra here?”
“Storm Shadow is far beyond your reach, boy,” Zandar said, stepping backwards and literally disappearing from view. “As for why we’re here… well, that should be obvious. To kill you all…” It wasn’t the real plan, but it angered T’Gin-Zu. Plus the bafflement on the face of the young ninja as he became invisible made it worth it. He ran off, moving as quietly as he knew how to be. Once he was certain he was far enough away, he radioed the Siegie in charge of the invasion. “There is still one ninja active other than Scarlett. I repeat, one ninja still active.”
“Damn,” the Crimson Guardsman said. “All right. You did your best. Keep creating havoc and kill as many as you can.”
“Nothing like a suicide mission, eh?” Zandar joked.
“If Joes die, then its a win for us,” the Crimson Guardsman said. “Even if all of us are killed in exchange.”
Zandar rolled his eyes, the Guardsman suddenly cut off with the distinctive sound of a head exploding from a hollow point round. Forgive me if I prioritize survival, Zandar thought, heading off to see if he could kill a few more Joes before he made a break for it. This whole mission was stupid, anyway.
T’Gin-Zu cursed angrily after a cursory examination revealed Zandar’s escape, kicking the blockade open and letting the dojo vent out. “I am sorry my brothers and sister,” he said to his still-unconscious teammates. “I am sorry I did not get here sooner. But I will make Zandar pay.”
He ran off down the hall, ready to make the Dreadnok pay for humiliating his clan. And praying he could do something to stop this invasion.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Equestria…
Throne Room...
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“We have to get back home NOW,” Duke said.
“Believe me, I’d love to send you,” Twilight said. “But the portal needs time to recharge! It can only be used once a week!”
“Gawddamn it! Our people are in danger!” Beach Head snarled.
“If what Zartan said is true, then we got traitors in our ranks!” Roadblock yelled.
“Can’t you charge the portal directly or something?” Ember asked.
“No!” Twilight said, tears of frustration flowing. “We tried that during the testing phase and it blew up! We had to start from scratch and rebuild the portal!”
“What about him?” Pharynx said, gesturing to Discord.
Discord shook his head. “I can’t get near it,” he said. “It’s almost pure order magic. I come within a few feet of it, it might open up to a world of dancing chimichangas. Or something far less amusing.”
Twilight shivered. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I’m so sorry… I never foresaw any of this!”
“You couldn’t have, darling,” Rarity said, gently nuzzling the alicorn.
“She’s right,” Spirit said. “Cobra has proven frighteningly competent in the past. It is a failure of intelligence and observation on our part that we’ve missed both Cobra’s presence in the base and their inroads into your world.”
“Which we STILL need to discuss,” Tempest Shadow said. “We don’t know the capabilities of Cobra’s current forces and how they compare to ours.”
Snake-Eyes just paced back and forth in frustration. “I want to talk to Zartan,” he signed.
“You want to stab him a few million times,” Rock n’ Roll said.
“That too,” Snake-Eyes said. “But I’ll make him talk first.”
“We need him alive for information, Snake-Eyes,” Duke ordered. “He can’t talk if he’s too busy screaming in agony.”
Snake-Eyes’ sneer was visible through his mask, and he started moving his hands to say something else, but Luna cut him off.
“We must trust in your Lady Jaye and my sister to get information out of the shapeshifter,” the alicorn Queen said. “All of us were caught flat-hoofed by this, and the only ones truly to blame are Cobra themselves.”
“That’s right,” Sunset Shimmer said, flaring her wings. “We need to focus on the problem of getting the Joes home and investigating Cobra’s presence in this world.” She turned to Twilight. “Are you sure you can’t fast charge the portal?” She already knew, having helped build it, but Twilight was the head of the project and knew more about the design.
“Everything about it is fine-tuned to the nth degree. Any disruption could disable it and force us to start from scratch,” Twilight said.
“...Such as an attack on it,” Shining Armor said, Twilight’s eyes shooting up in alarm, everyone else realizing what he meant quickly.
“...Damn, he’s right,” Duke said. “Your Majesty-”
Queen Luna was already moving, quickly writing up orders on a scroll and drawing Cobra’s symbol on it, the Joes having shown it to her last night. “Rainbow Dash. Fastest in Equestria. Take this to the Wonderbolt station here in Canterlot and have them guard the portal. They are to attack and eliminate any creature approaching the portal with this symbol on them,” she said.
Rainbow Dash saluted, and sped off in a swirl of color with the message.
Cadance came forward. “Forgive us, Auntie,” she said. “But I’m becoming antsy about our own kingdom.”
“Same,” Pharynx said. “Thorax and Chrysalis really need to know about this.”
Ember frowned. “Yeah, I’m gettin’ kinda nervous now. You mind if we all head back?”
Queen Luna nodded. “Discord, can you make portals back to their homes?” she asked.
“Why do I have to be taxi service?” the draconequus grumped.
“Because I am sending you to Ponyville to protect Fluttershy and Applejack afterwards,” Queen Luna said.
Discord stared at the alicorn queen, and the Joes could see the potential danger of the situation finally sinking into the all-powerful being’s head. “...Fine,” he said, snapping his fingers. Three portals appeared, leading into three different throne rooms, the creatures on the other end looking startled.
“Thank you,” Shining Armor said. “Please, keep us informed.”
“You know it,” Spike said, saluting as Shining, Cadance, Pharynx and Ember returned to their respective lands. The portals vanished after they passed through, Discord snapping his fingers and vanishing in a swirl of snack cakes moments later.
Queen Luna discreetly claimed a moon pie from the mess. She started to say something, when a wet sounding explosion came from the room where Jaye and Celestia were interrogating Zartan, startling everyone.
Jaye and Celestia both staggered out, covered in blood and sputtering.
“Your Majesty!” Sunset said, teleporting some napkins from the kitchens and starting to wipe down Celestia. “What happened?”
Jaye accepted the napkins Sunset offered her, scowling. “See for yourself,” she said angrily.
Snake-Eyes, Rarity, and Mutt were the closest, looking into the room, Junkyard poking his head in along with them. Junkyard whimpered and backed away, Rarity turning to vomit into a vase, while Mutt gagged and staggered out. “Holy shit… His head exploded!” Snake-Eyes just stared, shaking in barely contained fury, his vengeance denied.
“What in blazes happened!?” Duke asked.
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Earlier…
Interrogation room…
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“AAAAH!!!” Zartan screamed, scrabbling to get away from Celestia’s sunlight as the alicorn glowed brightly, his skin a bright blue. “TURN IT OFF!! TURN IT OFF!”
Lady Jaye, covering her eyes to protect herself and looking away, calmly asked, “Are you going to cooperate?”
“YES!” Zartan wailed. “JUST GET THAT OVERGROWN SUN LAMP TO STOP GLOWING AT ME!!”
Lady Jaye nodded, and Celestia faded back to normal light. “I do not like using my light for this purpose,” she said.
“Forgive me, your Majesty,” Lady Jaye said. “But we’re on a time crunch, and exploiting his weakness to sunlight was the fastest and cleanest method of doing it.” She picked up Zartan, his skin turning back to normal, his arms ziptied behind his back and his legs ziptied together, and put him back on his chair. “Now, it’s time to clarify what you meant.”
Zartan chuckled. “Half of your greenshirts are actually our Troopers, Zandar, and a Siegie,” he said. “They have been for months now. It doesn’t matter if I tell you now because the Commander’s already given the code to attack.”
“HOW?” Lady Jaye demanded, her face cold and emotionless.
“Little implant in my neck,” Zartan said. “Magitek communicator. Mindbender’s been making some crazy advances since we found a portal to this world.”
“Yes,” said Cobra Commander’s voice from Zartan’s body, Lady Jaye and Celestia looking startled. “And I’m afraid that’s all I’m letting you have.”
“Commander…” Zartan said, looking frightened. “Commander, I wasn’t going to give them anything they could use!”
“You were going to spoil my surprises! Snitch out all the little Christmas presents I have planned for them!” Cobra Commander said. “That’s just rude… Now I have to activate the magitek implant’s secondary function.”
Zartan’s eyes widened. “What are you talking about? What secondary function?”
“You and I both liked the Suicide Squad movie with Will Smith,” Cobra Commander said. “You know exactly what the secondary function is.”
Zartan stared into space for a moment, and closed his eyes, beginning to laugh.
Celestia blinked. “Suicide Squad? What is he talking about?”
Lady Jaye, not a comics fan herself, frowned. “Zartan, what’s going on?”
Zartan shook his head. “Years of loyalty,” he said. “Years of putting up with your inane schemes…”
“Sorry,” Cobra Commander lied. “Everyone but me is expendable. You know I’ve always believed that.”
“True, true…” Zartan said. “It seems Zandar and Zarana’s paranoia about the implants were well-founded… Ah well.” He sneered at the two women, as a sizzling sound began to come from him. “My only real regret is that I won’t be able to see Snake-Eyes’ expression when he realizes his vengeance was stolen from him.”
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Now…
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“And then his head blew up,” Lady Jaye said, spitting out some brain matter. Snake-Eyes, despite being mute, somehow managed to growl, punching a wall in frustration and leaving cracks in it, much to the alarm of the guards in the room.
Celestia burst into a white-hot flame for a brief moment, burning away all the remaining gore on her body. “We have to start an immediate investigation. We… what in the world is that sound?”
Everyone looked up, the Joes getting worried expressions when they realized what they were hearing. “...Cobra,” Spirit said softly, the Joes all running to the nearest balcony to observe what was coming in.
“SHIT!” Mainframe said as he recognized the boxy design. “That’s a B.A.T. dropship!”
“Bats?” Queen Celestia asked.
“B.A.T.s,” Duke clarified, spelling out the acronym. “Short for Battle Android Troopers. Automatons programmed for one purpose – Kill everything with a heartbeat.”
Snake-Eyes, already shaking with rage from losing his chance to avenge his master, began to shake for another reason. Lifeline noticed it, putting a hand on the ninja’s shoulder, Snake-Eyes gripping it for comfort.
“Ammo count!” Duke roared as the ship came down, dropping a large container into the castle gardens, guards cautiously approaching it.
The doors burst open, and B.A.T.s began spilling out. “Not anywhere near enough,” Roadblock said.
Beach Head pulled out a pair of binoculars and began studying the machines. “Mostly standard issues, mark 1s. About thirty Inferno B.A.T.s, ten heavy armor types, and twenty I ain’t never seen before. Clawed and with mouths.”
The aforementioned clawed B.A.T.s opened their mouths and let out a scream. The sound was human, and very familiar.
“God… Is that Storm Shadow’s voice?” Lady Jaye said.
Snake-Eyes, upon hearing the voice of his sword brother coming from the mouths of the monsters who had haunted his nightmares for so long, staggered, a choking noise coming from his throat. He fell to his hands and knees, shaking and hyperventilating as he became overwhelmed by the memories of that night, Luna and Lifeline trading worried looks.
“Snake? Snake-Eyes, what’s happening?” Duke asked, glancing out when he heard the guards starting to fight the B.A.T.s, screams coming from the guards as the machines returned fire. Celestia and Luna had already vanished, teleporting to coordinate the defense, while Roadblock and Mutt started shooting as well, some of the B.A.T.s dying in a squawk.
“What are those things?” Rock & Roll asked, joining Roadblock and Mutt in the firing line.
Lifeline knelt down by the shaking ninja. “They have to know,” he said softly. Reluctantly, still shivering in fear, still fighting back the memories, nodded. Lifeline turned to the others. “Those clawed ones are called A.N.B.A.T.s. Short for Anti-Ninja. They’re an anti-melee type. Cobra Commander dumped a ton of them on the Arashikage compound the night Storm Shadow was taken. They…” He shook his head. “It was a curbstomp. They defeated every ninja there.”
The Joes all stared in growing horror. They’d seen Snake-Eyes and the other ninjas defeat B.A.T.s as if they weren’t even there. If Cobra Commander had figured out a way to make them too much for the ninjas to defeat... The clawed B.A.T.s screamed again. Snake-Eyes made a choking sound. Everyone there realized that the ninja was sobbing now.
“PTSD…” Tempest said softly.
“Damn it… You up for fighting these things?” Beach Head asked. Snake-Eyes dearly wanted to say yes, but it was too much. He could barely move right now, and shook his head. “Fuck. Duke…” Beach Head muttered.
“Stay here,” Duke ordered the ninja. “Defend the civilians. You’re our best man for that right now.”
Snake-Eyes shivered. He knew that Duke was giving him an out, something to do other than give into his nightmares. He nodded gratefully, and used his sheathed sword to push himself upright.
“Lifeline, I’m going to want to know how you knew that. For now, let’s junk those machines!” Duke said. “Tempest, where would Celestia and Luna go to coordinate the battlefield?”
“I’ll take you,” she said.
“Right,” Duke said. “Beach, Spirit, Jaye, Mainframe, you’re with me. We’ll head to the Queens and help from there. Lifeline, coordinate with any medical ponies you find. Roadblock, Rock & Roll, Mutt, charge these things and draw them off from the guards. Keep to cover and come back alive.”
“I’ll help the fighters!” Twilight said, desperate to be useful.
“So will I,” Sunset said.
“I can send messages via dragonflame,” Spike said. “I’ll help coordinate things.”
“Glad to have you with us. Let’s go! YO JOE!” Roadblock said, everyone running off to their positions, Snake-Eyes wishing everyone well, and cursing his own weakness, hating how he quivered in fear whenever one of the A.N.B.A.T.s roared in Storm Shadow’s voice.
Brother… Snake-Eyes thought. I’m so sorry… I’ll save you… And I’ll make everyone who dares wear Cobra’s symbol PAY…
Rarity stayed behind, knowing she wasn’t a fighter. Pinkie Pie stayed as well, knowing she was well out of her element here. “I’m so sorry for what happened to you…” Rarity said. “I won’t condescend and pretend I understand how you feel. But I know you are in pain. I understand Gesturespeak, so if you want to talk…”
Snake-Eyes hesitated a long moment. “...Thank you. Perhaps later,” he signed, shivering at another roar from the A.N.B.A.T.s. “Right now, I need to focus on being able to function around those things without turning into a mess.”
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The Pit…
Human World...
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Blowtorch, Charbroil, and the Ice Cream Soldier all blasted their flamethrowers, sending a crowd of Cobras running for their lives. The three flame troopers sneered at the traitors, feeling no sympathy as one of the female Cobras, having taken a full on blast to the face, collapsed, dead.
“Damn it,” Blowtorch said, the veteran Joe shaking his head. “This is a mess and a half…”
“Don’t I know it,” Charbroil said. “To think we’ve been infiltrated for this long.”
“It is a pain, ain’t it?” Ice Cream Soldier said, calm as always.
Blowtorch laughed. “I never get how yuir able te stay calm no matter what,” he said. “It’s a good quality.”
Ice Cream Soldier chuckled. “Hey, I didn’t get my name because of my undying love for Rocky Road,” he said. “On your left.”
“Aye,” Blowtorch said, turning and flaming down the hallway, scaring back the Cobras that were coming down it.
“Gotta be cool if you’re a flame specialist,” Charbroil quipped.
“Rather difficult,” Ice Cream Soldier added. “Since we’re all so damn HOT.” The trio laughed, turning the corner and running into a Cobra that had been separated from the others.
Charbroil slammed him up against the wall. “Any particular reason you assholes are here?”
The Cobra trooper sneered. “To make you look bad,” he said, whipping out his sidearm and shooting himself in the head.
“Jesus…” Blowtorch muttered, crossing himself and backing away, letting the man’s corpse fall to the floor.
Ice Cream Soldier was rattled, but befitting his name, he didn’t show it. “Well, now we know they aren’t planning to be taken prisoner…”
“Damn waste,” Blowtorch said, shaking his head. “All right. The two of ye on my flank. Ice Cream Soldier, watch our backs. We can still get through this, we just have te be careful.”
There was a soft sound, one that went unnoticed amid the clamor of battle and the crackle of flames. None of them noticed it.
“I know its nerve-racking to know that they’ve been here for so long,” Blowtorch said, Charboil and Ice Cream Soldier both yelping as the crossbow bolt pierced through Blowtorch’s helmet and erupted from behind his eye. “But we have to… keep going… and… protect…” Blowtorch, not even realizing what happened, went limp, his flamethrower dropping from his hand as he died, falling to the ground.
“Back to back!” Charbroil ordered. “Back to back!” Charbroil and Ice Cream Soldier did just that, going back to back, spraying flames in every direction to try and catch whatever was shooting at them. The two Joes were in a room with four entry points, and each one could be a place for the shooter to take them out. “We’ve got this, kid! We just have to-”
A crossbow bolt struck Charbroil in the throat. With a choking gurgle, blood filling his helmet, he went down, dead in seconds.
Ice Cream Soldier was starting to panic. But he kept outwardly, determined not to show weakness to his opponent, whomever it was. He aimed his flamethrower down one hallway, and his napalm launcher down another. “You’ll find I’m not as easy to kill!” he called out.
“Oh, but that’s the beauty of it,” said a voice, one that echoed throughout the room. Ice Cream Soldier turned frantically, trying to find the source, his legendary calm starting to leave him as the voice circled around him. “You Joes are so very, very easy to kill. We’ve had you infiltrated for ages now. Always waiting, willingly fighting against our brothers and sisters while pretending to believe in your cause. All waiting for the right moment to strike. The right moment to take you down once and for all.”
Ice Cream Soldier blasted flames around the room. “WHERE ARE YOU!?” he called out.
“Where death always is, little fireball… right at your baAAACCK!!” the voice yelped. Ice Cream Soldier whirled, seeing T’Gin-Zu tackling someone that was fading back into existence to the ground. It took the flame trooper a moment to realize it was Zandar that the ninja was beating the shit out of.
“Stand aside,” Ice Cream Soldier growled. “I’ll cook this bastard.”
T’Gin-Zu glanced back, a costly mistake that allowed Zandar to punch the ninja in the groin and shove him off of him, quickly running away and disappearing again.
“Damn it… Master Snake-Eyes will have my head,” T’Gin-Zu said, groaning slightly from the low blow.
“Sorry,” Ice Cream Soldier said, visibly shaking as he lowered his flamethrower. “I just…”
“You lost comrades,” T’Gin-Zu said, wincing in pain from the crotch blow as he stood up. “It’s understandable. We will avenge them all, I promise you.”
Ice Cream Soldier nodded. “Where the hell are the rest of you ninjas? I thought you’d be cleaning up by now,” he asked.
T’Gin-Zu, mentally willing the pain away, shook his head. “I am the only one active, and even then its only by sheer chance because I was on KP duty. The rest, save for Scarlett, were hit with sleeping gas.”
“Damn it,” Ice Cream Soldier said.
“Fear not,” T’Gin-Zu said. “We are making progress in eliminating the Cobras. And I will hunt down Zandar.” The ninja ran down the hall, quickly vanishing into the flames.
Ice Cream Soldier just nodded, looking down at the corpses of the two veterans, each one a mentor to him when he first joined the unit. They’d shown him the ropes of being a flamethrower trooper, protected him in battle… hell, they’d even showed him how to barbecue.
He closed his eyes. It was the first time since becoming a soldier that he’d lost comrades in battle. It was not a good feeling. He hated feeling like a failure, like he’d failed his teachers and unit brothers. Taking a breath to calm himself, he quickly checked his weapons, and advanced. “Time to do something constructive with the way I’m feeling,” he muttered, planning to cook every Cobra he found.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Canterlot Castle…
Pony World…
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
The initial yell was just to get the B.A.T.s attention, and it worked. Rock n’ Roll, Mutt, and Roadblock quickly ducked behind cover, taking potshots at the B.A.T.s as they advanced. There were archers and unicorn guardsmen there as well, most of them too afraid to move. Pegasus guards were flitting back and forth, trying to fire on the advancing army of automatons, but quickly finding themselves stymied.
“Take shots at the Inferno B.A.T.s! The red ones!” Mutt called out. They’ll explode if damaged enough, and damage the others!”
“The panel on their chests is their main core!” Rock n’ Roll added. “Take that out and they go down!”
Roadblock took the time to provide them with an example, finding a place to set up his machine gun and firing it. Several of the wicked machines were damaged badly by the gunfire, the Inferno B.A.T that took a hit bursting into flame and exploding, the heat slagging some of the nearest B.A.T.s. Feeling a bit more confident, the guards started to fire again. Their bows were doing little damage to the advancing machines, but now that they knew what to aim for, they were starting to get more hits in.
Still, the wave of metal warriors seemed endless. And there were still many B.A.T.s left to go.
From the battlements, cannonfire rained down on the B.A.T.s, the more intact ones salvaging parts from their dead neighbors and using those to fix themselves.
“They can self-repair?!” Queen Celestia said, horrified.
“Unfortunately,” Duke said, taking shots with his sidearm. “It’s a newer feature, and its mainly used for the mark 1s, who are meant to be cannon fodder.”
A pegasus guard went down, shot five times by the advancing B.A.T.s. “For cannon fodder, these machines are doing quite well in killing our ponies!” Queen Luna said, powering up and firing a massive blast of energy down at the B.A.T.s from her horn. Moments later, Tempest Shadow had to pull her out of the way as a barrage of bullets and rockets were sent her way, just barely missing her.
“Madness…” Queen Celestia said, tears streaming down her face at every death. “This is madness.”
“It’s Cobra, your Majesty,” Lady Jaye said sadly. “They made these monsters, designed them to do nothing but kill.”
Duke glanced over to Beach Head, who was sniping B.A.T.s with his rifle. “Any sign of leadership?” he asked.
“No sir,” Beach Head said. “No Overkill Minors anywhere.”
Duke nodded, relieved. “Good. Then its just a charge and blast unit.”
“Overkill Minors?! LEADERSHIP!?” Queen Celestia demanded.
“Higher intelligence robots based on the cyborg that generally commands the B.A.T.s in battle. This unit is meant just to dump and destroy, giving Cobra a chance to clear out,” Duke explained.
“Leadership or not, they are monsters!” Queen Celestia said, catching the body of another pegasus that was shot out of the airs.
“Canterlot hasn’t seen battle like this since…” Queen Luna shook her head. “Canterlot’s NEVER seen battle like this!”
“We’ll stop them,” Duke promised. “We just need to keep fighting!”
As they talked, though, a quintet of A.N.B.A.T.s charged through, heading for the castle. The spider-like androids shrieked in their disquieting voices, Roadblock, Rock n’ Roll, and Mutt firing desperately to keep them from reaching the castle. They managed to take out two of them, but three made it through, heading into the castle proper. Junkyard ran after them, barking angrily, Mutt calling desperately for his dog to return, forced to duck back down as gunfire hit near his head.
Snake-Eyes shivered in fear as he heard Storm Shadow’s voice coming from the A.N.B.A.T.s, drawing his katana and reloading his Uzi, performing mental exercises to try and calm himself down. Pinkie and Rarity stood behind him, shivering as the creatures scuttled forward, extending their electrowhips. They slowly, deliberately stalked towards Snake-Eyes, as if they could sense the fear in his heart.
And fear was indeed gripping the ninja master’s heart. Fear, and nightmarish memories of Storm Shadow begging for his life, the sound of lightning crackling in his ears as he was electrocuted over and over. His heart was thumping so hard that Rarity and Pinkie could hear it, his hands shaking around his weapons.
So intent was everyone on staring at their opponents that none of them noticed Junkyard literally run up the body of one of the A.N.B.A.T.s and sink his teeth into the android’s neck. The android shrieked, his voice degrading to an electronic warble as it shook back and forth, Junkyard’s powerful rottweiler jaws holding in, the android’s throat being ripped out from the sheer strength of the dog’s bite. This resistance didn’t last long, as one of the other A.N.B.A.T.s wrapped a tentacle around Junkyard and pulled him away, electrocuting the dog.
The sound of Junkyard yelping in pain spurred something within Snake-Eyes. His vision became engulfed in red, the words NEVER AGAIN flashing through his mind over and over. His body moved without his mind, leaping up and slashing apart the tentacles in a blur of motion. He then kicked over the A.N.B.A.T. that had been hurting Junkyard and emptied an entire clip into the robot’s skull, spewing oil everywhere.
Rarity quickly levitated Junkyard out of the way, stroking the charred, but thankfully still alive canine’s head as she surrounded them both in a forcefield. Both she and Pinkie Pie watched, amazed, as Snake-Eyes seemingly came alive, showing none of the fear he had before, hacking off the hands of another A.N.B.A.T. and starting to chop it into bite-sized chunks. As he did, though, the third A.N.B.A.T. came up behind him, lashing
Pinkie Pie, reacting on pure instinct, pulled out her party cannon from nowhere and fired it, streamers wrapping around the A.N.B.A.T. and pinning its and claws coils to its chest, a large amount of uncooked cake batter and two lit candles slapping into the face of the android.
Snake-Eyes barely registered the sudden aid from Pinkie Pie. He whirled, paused only briefly when he saw the immobilized A.N.B.A.T., and used both uzi and katana to tear the last one apart. It was only after he was certain that the androids were dead that he let himself feel afraid again, collapsing to his hands and knees.
“That was magnificent, darling!” Rarity said, dropping her forcefield. Junkyard, limping a little, went over to lick Snake-Eyes’ masked face. Snake-Eyes petted the rottweiler.
“Thank you for keeping him safe,” Snake-Eyes signed.
Rarity smiled. “I had to,” she said. “Junkyard is a very good boy, and Fluttershy would never forgive me if I let an animal get hurt.”
Snake-Eyes just nodded, turning to Pinkie Pie next. “Thank you for the assist,” he signed, Rarity translating for him. “But where did you get the cannon?”
Pinkie Pie leaned on the cannon casually. “I always have a party cannon stored away for an emergency! I wish I’d had time to bake the cake first, though…” she said, shrugging.
Snake-Eyes blinked. Rarity shook her head. “It’s best not to think about it, darling. Pinkie is… well, she’s Pinkie. And she works by her own rules.”
Junkyard barked, panting lazily. “Indeed,” Rarity agreed, chuckling.
Snake-Eyes just shook his head. The trauma those damn robots brought him was still there, but he knew he could force himself to fight them now. He just hoped that no more got in. “Let’s move to a more secure place,” he signed. “Any ideas?”
“I think so,” Rarity said. “Follow me!” She let Pinkie, Junkyard, and Snake-Eyes along, a few servants who had been hiding with them following along also. They just hoped the battle would end soon.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
The Pit…
Human world…
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Zandar cursed as he watched the battle from the shadows. They’d managed to take out a few of the Joes, but the losses for the Cobra forces were mounting up. Fortunately, he had evaded T’Gin-Zu for now, but he was running out of time. Cobra Commander had given him two specific assignments for when the invasion started. One he’d already done, gas the ninjas. The next…
He checked the office and, of course, General Hawk wasn’t there. The leader and heart of G.I. Joe was a front-line general, so he would be out and about, fighting alongside his troops and giving orders from there.
He eventually found him in a fortified area, just outside the Motor Pool. Cold Front, Tracker, and Blast-Off lay around him, dead from bullet wounds, and the general’s face was furious, his assault rifle blazing as he fired on the remaining Cobra forces, screaming into a comm.
“Everyone still alive start converging! Take prisoners if you can! Disarm them first, as they’re committing suicide if they think they’re gonna be caught! Push them back! And for the absolute last goddamn time, WHERE THE HELL ARE MY NINJAS!?”
“They aren’t coming, General,” said Zandar, still invisible. “I gassed them all, put them to sleep.”
General Hawk looked around, aiming his assault rifle. “Who… Zandar! I know that voice!” he snarled. “Show yourself!”
“You’ve lost, General Hawk. We know the location of every one of your hidden bases. We know the limits of all your equipment. Your people in Equestria? They’ll be dead soon,” Zandar teased. “And you’ll be dead too.”
“It’ll take a lot more than one scum-sucking coward like you to stop me, Zandar!” General Hawk snarled. “Joes die hard!”
“Really?” Zandar said, fading into view, crossbow aimed directly at General Hawk’s neck. “I’ve found it rather easy to kill you today.” He fired, the bolt striking Hawk right in the neck.
And then Hawk began to laugh. “What the…” Zandar said, confused as to why Hawk wasn’t dying.
“So… remember when Cobra was experimenting with animal-enhanced soldiers? They managed to capture me and infuse me with their formula, turning me into… I think they called me Venomous Maximus. Remember that?” Hawk said, almost casually.
Zandar did remember. And he was starting to realize something. “Oh… Oh shit…” he said. He started to turn invisible, but General Hawk’s hand shot out, catching him by the throat. With a visible wince and a grunt of pain, Hawk yanked the bolt out of his neck. There was a trace of blood flow, and the wound healed almost immediately.
Hawk smirked. “Turns out the formula had some… lasting effects,” he said, idly twirling the bloody crossbow bolt between his fingers.
“Oh fuck me,” Zandar choked. Hawk threw him down the hall, Zandar flying as if he weighed no more than a three inch tall plastic action figure. He looked up, seeing Hawk charging towards him, moving at speeds he thought only ninjas could match. He tried to get up, but Hawk caught up to him and kicked him in the stomach like a soccer ball, Zandar bouncing and skidding until he hit a far wall.
T’Gin-Zu, having finally caught up with Zandar, backed away as the Dreadnok tried to recover, only for Hawk to reach him again and slam him into the wall again and again, until Zandar’s body was wedged into the wall and stuck there.
Hawk wiped the sweat from his brow, shaking his head. “Biotech enhancements, son,” Hawk said, spitting on Zandar’s unconscious body. “Be sure to thank Mindbender for giving them to me.” He turned, seeing a visibly impressed T’Gin-Zu watching him. The ninja snapped to attention when he noticed, saluting.
“At ease,” Hawk said. “You got a cable or anything on you? I need to tie this little shit up.”
“Of course,” T’Gin-Zu said. “Master Snake-Eyes insists we have rope, cable, and wire on us at all times for… various reasons.” He reached into his belt, unlatched a hidden pocket, and pulled out a long rope from around his waist.
“Good man,” Hawk said. “What he said about the ninjas true?”
T’Gin-Zu nodded. “Yes sir,” he said. “I was in KP, fortunately, so I was not in the dojo when it was locked down and gassed.”
“Wake them up,” Hawk said. “You did good in chasing after him.”
“Not good enough, sir,” T’Gin-Zu said sadly. “He evaded me with those new invisibility powers of his. Killed off at least Charbroil and Blowtorch before I caught up with him again.”
Hawk cursed, and kicked the unconscious Dreadnok in frustration. “He’s stopped now,” he said. “We’ll make sure he’s prosecuted. Go. Get the rest of the clan awake again. We’re routing them but we’re still taking hits from the few that are left.”
T’Gin-Zu nodded, bowing and running off. “Yes sir,” he said as he left.
Hawk just shook his head, praying the Equestria team was all right.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Canterlot Castle…
Pony world…
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
“They’re dying out there,” Queen Celestia said as more of her guards were shot down by the advancing B.A.T.s. Roadblock, Mutt, and Rock n’ Roll ran out of ammo and were forced to retreat, the heavy armored B.A.A.T.s starting to move to protect their fellows, blocking arrow shots and tanking magical blasts.
Lady Jaye had switched over to a bow, as had Beach Head. It was a little awkward grip for them, as the bows had been designed for ponies rather than humans, but they were close enough to human design for them to use them.
That wasn’t the main concern, however. Queen Celestia was starting to panic, her body radiating intense heat. Queen Luna, concerned for her sibling, was radiating cold to counteract it, but it was starting to become too intense. The cannons were starting to melt, and the gathered ponies on the battlements were having to back away from her.
“This has to stop…” Queen Celestia said, her eyes turning a deep, fiery orange-red with gold irises, her mane and tail starting to flicker between an aura of fire and their usual aurora.
One of the B.A.A.T.s actually caught a cannonball shot at it, and flung it back with tremendous force, shattering the firing stand and killing the operators.
“Queen Celestia, please calm down…” Twilight said, throwing up a force field to protect everyone from the growing heat. She was frightened, not just of the B.A.T.s, but of what was happening to one of her mentors.
And more and more the B.A.T.s advanced, some breaking away to start targeting civilians, heading into the city. Screams from the servants inside the castle were starting to reach them.
“We’re doing everything we can, your Majesty,” Duke said, Sunset pulling him back behind a forcefield of her own when Celestia’s anger flared.
“IT IS NOT ENOUGH!” Queen Celestia roared, a column of flame engulfing her, Luna, Twilight, and Starlight doing their best to keep the inferno contained. Luna was putting out tremendous amounts of cold just to keep the stone from melting around Celestia as her regalia quickly liquified. Roaring, furious, Celestia took to the sky with a flap of her wings, the sun’s light growing so intense that it looked like it was radiating an aura of flame. “I WILL PURGE THESE MACHINES FROM OUR HOME! FOREVER!!”
Eyes blazing red, tail and mane an inferno, Celestia launched herself down into the army of B.A.T.s. Many of them were slagged just by being near her, bullets melting before coming into contact with her. Celestia, infuriated, swung her horn like a sword, great arcs of fire engulfing the B.A.T.s. Sensing danger, the B.A.T.s that had made it into the castle and started to head into the city making their way back to fight Celestia. All that did was make it easy for the furious, rampaging alicorn Queen to destroy them all.
And destroy them was almost too light a word for it. She stomped on or gored with her horn any robot in her vicinity, her flames reducing what was left to metal slag. Trees burned to ash around her as she reduced the invading force to a pile of molten metal. Once the B.A.T.s were all destroyed, Celestia roared in fury. “COBRA!!! FACE ME!!!”
Before she could do anything else, though, a massive, heavy downpour rained down on her, shocking her enough to drop her fiery form, the sun going back to normal brightness as it disappeared behind the clouds. She sputtered, her eyes, tail, and mane back to normal as she looked up at her sister, a worried, frightened Luna having hastily brought up the storm to try and calm her down.
And now that she was calm, Celestia could finally look around and see just what it was she had done. Metal and stone slag surrounded her, and the remains of what had once been a beautiful garden of rare flowers was slowly settling around her, everything reduced to ash and slag. Soldiers stared at her in a mix of awe and utter terror.
“I… oh dear…” Celestia said nervously. “I did this, didn’t I?”
Luna nodded slowly, landing near her. “Are you all right, sister?” she asked.
Celestia shook her head. “No…” she said, feeling more than a little dizzy. “No, I’m not… I… I’ve never been that ANGRY before… It felt as if there was something inside me, clawing at my heart…”
“...Questionable methods aside,” Duke said, coming out to join the two sisters, “it worked. You stopped the B.A.T.s from doing any more damage.”
Celestia frowned. “...You’re frightened,” she said, looking into Duke’s eyes.
“...Yes,” Duke said. He couldn’t deny it. Seeing that much power being thrown around by a single being, it was terrifying. “You just displayed a frightening amount of power. But that won’t affect our alliance, I assure you.”
Celestia smiled weakly. “Yes… Well, I suppose we should get to work on investigating this, shall we? I am sorry I could not preserve anything intact for you…”
Duke just nodded. “We’ll worry about that later,” he said. “Let’s just- Wait, Mainframe?”
The little technician looked very scared. “Your Majesties. Twilight said that Canterlot was held up by heavy magical reinforcement, yes?”
“That is true,” Queen Luna said, “yes. What of it?”
Mainframe fidgeted. “I just… I just have a really sick feeling that we need to get down there now.”
Luna and Celestia traded worried looks. “All right,” Luna said. “We’ll escort you.”
Minutes later, Twilight, Sunset, the Queens, and the Joes (minus Mutt, who had insisted on the castle vet doing a quick examination of Junkyard after he heard about the A.N.B.A.T. electrocuting him) were all deep down underneath the city, standing before a set of massive pillars, all curving to hold up the city on the mountain, each one impossibly thick, looking almost as dense as steel.
Each one wrapped top to bottom in explosives.
“Oh my god…” Lifeline said, horrified.
“What… What IS all this!?” Sunset asked.
Beach Head cautiously approached one of the bombs. “...Firefly’s work,” he said. “And he must have been down here a while.”
“Who is this ‘Firefly!?’” Queen Luna demanded.
“One of Cobra’s mercenaries,” Lady Jaye said. “One of the most efficient demolition men on the planet.” She shook her head. “This is so damn strange. Why to all of this trouble just when we show up…” A thought occurred to her, and she trailed off, thinking about what she just said.
“Is he a wizard!? Because he’d have to be to sneak past the guards and place all this without them noticing!” Queen Luna said furiously.
“...Unless they were compromised,” Spirit said, frowning.
“WHAT?!” the Queens shouted, visibly horrified. Twilight and Sunset looked shaken as well.
“It makes sense,” Lady Jaye said. “I don’t like it, but it makes sense. No one’s perfect, your Majesties. They might have been paid to look the other way, not told specifically what Firefly was bringing in. And if they’ve been here for as long as Cobra’s said…”
“I’m going mad…” Queen Celestia said, falling to her knees. “The entire world is going mad…”
“They took a vow!” Twilight shouted. “The guards took vows to serve and obey! They wouldn’t betray that!”
“All that lives is susceptible to temptation,” Spirit said philosophically. “What tempts them most…” He shook his head. “It varies from person to person.”
Beach Head looked over one of the bombs. “I’ve had SOME EOD training. I can give this a go, if’n y’all can congure up some armor for me…”
“NO! Wait!” Twilight said, pulling Beach Head back. Her horn glowed, and all of the bombs suddenly had glowing runes emerge from them. “There’s some spellwork in these. We don’t know what will happen if they’re tampered with!”
Beach Head scowled. “Then gawddangit, what are we supposed to do?! We’ve got a countdown on here!”
“What?!” the Queens said. Beach Head gestured, and indeed, there was a countdown on each of the bombs, with a five hour timer on each.
“This is madness…” Queen Celestia said again.
Duke was thinking quickly. “...Princess Twilight. Can you fetch the communications journal? I need to get in contact with the base.”
Twilight blinked. “Huh? Oh, s-sure!” She vanished, and then reappeared moments later, carrying the journal and giving it over to Duke. He quickly began writing.
“Sir. We have a problem. Zartan was killed by Cobra Commander via the communicator in his head exploding, so we didn’t get anything out of him. On top of that there was a B.A.T. invasion that we just barely managed to fend off with the help of Queen Celestia, and now we’re down here in the support pillars holding the entire city up. And they’re covered in bombs infused with magic. Can you put Tripwire or one of the other EOD guys on the phone? There’s an absurd amount of explosives here and we’re at a loss.”
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
The Pit…
Hawk’s office...
Human world…
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
“Report,” Hawk said.
“All but three of the Cobra infiltrators are dead, one of the living ones being Zandar,” Scarlett said, having reunited with General Hawk after battle’s end. “Confirmed casualties so far are Blast-Off, Tracker, Cold Front, Blowtorch, Charbroil, Long Arm, Rapid Fire, Freestyle, Effects, Gears, Skystriker, and all six members of the Sky Patrol,” the red-headed intelligence officer said, silently vowing to avenge each fallen comrade. “The ninjas are fine. They are also humiliated and very, very pissed.”
“I can imagine,” Hawk said, sitting down and pouring himself some brandy. He needed a drink after all of this. “What about our greenshirts?”
Scarlett grimaced. “Total loss, sir. Every one of our recruits is dead.”
Hawk cursed. Loudly. He slammed his fist on his desk in frustration, and poured a glass of brandy for Scarlett as well. She gladly accepted it, because quite frankly this whole situation called for a drink. “We’re combing over every vehicle in the motor pool and the airfield, as well as all of our equipment, to make sure there’s no further sabotage…”
The communication journal from the Equestrians began to buzz, glowing with the emergency light. “...And we’re about to hear from the Equestrian team right now,” Scarlett said as Hawk picked up the book and read it.
Hawk scanned what Duke wrote, and scowled. “Find Tripwire and any of our other EOD specialists. Get them in here now,” he ordered. Scarlett nodded and ran off, coming back a few minutes later with Tripwire, Tunnel Rat, and Lightfoot in tow.
“I would have gotten Wreckage too, but he’s in intensive care,” Scarlett said. “Thankfully, none of the medics were hurt…”
“Small favors,” Hawk said, briefly updating the three explosive ordnance experts on what was going on.
Tripwire looked thoughtful, and held out his hand for the journal. Hawk handed it over… and almost immediately, Tripwire dropped it. He reached down for it, only to bonk his head on the desk. “Oww…” he groaned.
“Maybe you better let someone else hold it,” Lightfoot said, smiling patiently.
“Before you rip the thing in half,” Tunnel Rat muttered, picking up the journal and the pen used to write in it. “You looked like you had something to say, though, so I’ll write it for you.”
Tripwire nodded. “Yeah,” he said, rubbing his head, wishing he’d thought to wear his helmet. He was ridiculously clumsy with everything EXCEPT explosives, the veteran Joe well aware of his limits. “Ask them to try and draw the bomb, so we can get an idea of what we’re working with. Also, ask about the runes on the bomb, what each function is.”
Tunnel Rat nodded, and wrote down the question, letting them know who was there.
“You trust these men to handle explosives?” Queen Luna asked.
“Tripwire, Tunnel Rat, and Lightfoot are some of our best bomb disposers,” Duke said. “If they were in the room with me and an armed pack of semtex? I could relax knowing they could disarm it.”
“We’ll take your word for it,” Queen Celestia said, nervously watching as Twilight explained the function of each rune, drawing them along with a very detailed sketch of the bomb itself.
Tunnel Rat whistled softly. “Ah damn… That’s a Firefly Special all right,” he said.
“More than one from the sound of it,” Lightfoot said, stroking his chin.
Tripwire looked over Twilight’s explanation of the runes. “Anti-tamper, touch trigger…” he shook his head. “We can’t do anything until we get rid of those. If they do what Princess Twilight described, then we’re helpless until we do.”
Lightfoot nodded in agreement. “We can run them through disarming the bombs, but with those anti-tamper spells in place… is a sentence I’d never thought I’d say outside of a D&D session…”
Tunnel Rat finished the thought. “We can’t do shit unless the spell crap is cleaned off,” he said, writing down what they said.
Twilight and Sunset looked at each other, then at the runes. “...We can do it, but it’ll take time,” Sunset wrote. “At least twenty minutes to clear out each rune.”
Surprising Tunnel Rat, Tripwire grabbed the journal out of his hands and wrote in it. “What’s the countdown on the bombs?” he asked. When he received the answer, he then asked, “How many bombs are there?”
The answer left everyone in Hawk’s office stunned.
“Jesus H. Fuck…” Tunnel Rat muttered, crossing himself.
“No time…” Lightfoot said, a horrified look on his face. “There’s no time…”
Tripwire stared at the journal for the longest time, considering what to do, what options there might be. Seeing only one, he shook his head and reluctantly wrote down his advice.
“Evacuate the city. Canterlot is lost.”
TO BE CONTINUED...
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I blame Commander Cobra for having a funny voice of Starscream.
11162536
In the 1980's G. I. Joe cartoon, Cobra Commander was voiced by the same voice actor who did Starscream in the original Transformers cartoon.
11162563
That's what I meant.
Things are really going down hill for the ponies and the Joes, Cobra had a good plan to hit them very hard.
It's very good to see a new chapter from you again.
Those runes also make it so they can't just teleport those bombs away.
That's not C.C. level planning. That is Destro level.
Hot damn! I'm glad that this is finally here for all of us to read. But, seeing this;
Damn!!! You ain't giving the good guys enough plot armor!?
Not to mentioned of having HEAVILY Pony Casualties as well.
This is like Transformers the original movie, and the Live-Action Transformers Movies ALL OVER AGAIN!!!
But, war is war.
Not going to lie its been years last time I watch or read gi joe I had to look up this name to see who they were and if they were canon charters man am old lol
I hope to see an update soon!^_^