• Member Since 29th May, 2012
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Knackerman


I am the Knackerman. Most of my writing deals with horror, suspense, and tragedy. And yes, there will be gore.

T

Sunburst has been dutifully fulfilling his responsibilities as a Crystaler to the newborn Princess Flurry Heart. Although, given her young age, his 'lessons' mostly amount to extended baby sitting sessions. Though uncertain, Sunburst is proud of his position, and takes his role as the newborn Princess's guardian seriously. That is why, when a shadow suddenly falls over the heart of the Crystal Empire, he makes getting her to safety his first priority. As jagged dark crystals erupt and spread outwards from the Crystal Castle, a strange madness seems to spread through the populace.

Can Sunburst keep his goddaughter safe when the entire population of the Crystal Empire turns against him? What is the source of this strange madness that has gripped the populace? Will Twilight and her friends be able to aid him? And just who is the 'Empress'?

Chapters (11)
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Comments ( 23 )

You know, Discord can always send those Juggernauts to another dimension and retrieve them later, like , after they have defeated the Empress, Twilight is partly responsible for what happened to Discord, had she not interrupted things would have been much easier.

Anyway, interesting story :pinkiecrazy: I'm liking it so far.

7220243 It's a possibility, though there's no way that Twilight could know that.

That was quite an epic saga. And it looks like there's more to come...

...And they're dead. Calling it now.

"I've met your type before. Brainy, self-satisfied Unicorn's that look down on the rest of us as if we were simple."

Flash, supporting a tyrant is not a healthy way to deal with rejection :twilightblush:

Twilight noticed the sympathetic look that Starlight Glimmer gave her, the unicorn herself having ended up in Spike's earlier position, wedged between Big Mac and Bulk Bicep's.

Funny.

"Hey, guard duty isn't so bad,"

After all, you get to incinerate interlopers. Any guards getting past would completely remove Twilight from the equation, so you'd be responsible for her success as well.

You can't force people to accept new ideals anymore than you can force them to accept new leaders. What you're doing is wrong, Shiny!"

I'd say this was out of character, but people can be hypocrites sometimes.

So is the Empress Cadence or not? I'm confused.

Can I stop reading now, or is there more substantive content?

I have to say, I have read thousands of stories on this site, and this one exceeds all of them in one, simple category: This story is the most like the show. The pacing, the family-friendliness (which isn't really my cup of tea, but to each there own), and even the characters and concepts. Take that as you will.

7221911 Yeah, that line was included as a bit of a joke. I'm sure Twilight wouldn't think what her and her friends do was exactly forcing anyone to adopt new ideals, but it is kind of funny coming from her.

7222175 I choose to take that to mean I got the characterizations right! :pinkiecrazy:

It's an observation I've seen on other stories and I know it can be as much compliment as complaint, but since that's what I was going for it's a compliment for me.

Interesting read even if it's hard to like it due to the connection with your other stories. Too much mind-buck for it's own sake. This story is passable on it's own without it being part of this whole saga with Discord and the crazy pony who rewrites history however she likes here and there.

As for this particular story, there's a lot of nice description, but I will note that the pacing could use work in my opinion. The story feels very rushed despite being just over ten chapters. It feels like it all happened at the same time. If you meant for this to cover days or weeks, then that didn't make it through. Personally I'm not sure why some stories feel that way, but it's definitely a problem here, at least in my opinion. If you wanted it that way... well it doesn't really seem like enough time for all this to have developed and magical beams that just twist ponies that way, even other princesses, are kind of OP and unbelievable. See the first paragraph above.

7398840 Story is separate but in the same mythos as the previous saga. This trilogy is going to end up being it's own thing. And if it does feel like it didn't take place over the course of a week, that's good. It took place over about a day and a half. Didn't see a point in stretching things out further than that, though I'm sorry it ended up feeling a little rushed as a result.

"Well Pinkie, I came here today to make history and to enjoy cake and ice cream," answered Twilight with a confident smile. "And since we're all out of cake and ice cream, I guess we'll just have to make history!"

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Wp_K8prLfso

Way to make that awesome reference!!!:heart:

Okay, Empress Cadence reminds me of Daemon from Reboot...
Only Empress Cadence is actively evil and Daemon... well... she WAS evil but she was the sweet innocent evil that makes you hate to hate heer.

Oooh this is gonna be a good one. Time to grab some tea and popcorn.

I see what you did there.

And I approve

The beginning hooked me.

"Why are you doing this!?" cried Sunburst, shouting as his words were whipped away by the blizzard. "Who is this Empress of which you speak!? Have you betrayed Princess Cadence on Prince Shining Armor!?"

I believe you meant "and."

Twilight's taking charge, pretty awesome. Nice moment between Spike and Starlight.

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