Domination of Equestria - T-90 - days.
“Are you packed Rainbow?”
“Yea Twilight, I’ve been packed for hours. We need to get going!”
“Rainbow Dash! This could be the most important quest we’ve ever been on! If we don’t find that artefact Equestria will be turned upside down. Who knows how many ponies could die.”
“I know that Twi! Seriously, that’s why we should get going as soon as possible!”
“Oh Rainbow, I know how important speed is, but I also know how important it is to be prepared. I’m going to go over my list one more time.”
“Oh come on!”
See in the dark glasses times two? Check.
Pop-up boat? Check.
Emergency life jackets? Check.
Anti-Alligator Jaws? Check.
Waterproof saddlebags? Check one, check two.
Hoofmirrors? Check.
Loaves of stale bread? Four...check.
Minotaur Musk? Two pints, check.
Ball of String? Check.
Map Grade Parchment? Six rolls. Check.
Indelible Ink? Checking...four bottles.
Immovable Rods? One, Two, Three, Four. Second bag? Four. Check.
Slotted Horseshoes? Four Size Twilight. Four Size Rainbow Dash.
Squeaky Toys? One bone, one ball, one knotted rope. Check, check and check.
Portable Door? Let’s see…...side pocket. Check.
Fifty high calorie ration bars? Twenty five here…twenty five there.
One super sized, super compact inflatable stallion? Dammit Rainbow, now’s not the time.
“Ok Rainbow, we’re ready. Let’s go.”
“Are you really sure we need all of this Twilight?”
“I’m certain. All my research says that where we’re going, it’s going to be Hell. Literally.”
“Okay then. I trust you Twi. Let’s go end this war before it even starts!”
“Right behind you Dash. Hey there Ditzy, what’re you up to?”
“Oh hi there Twilight, Rainbow. I’m just responding to an ad I saw in the paper this morning. I need the extra bits to pay for Dinky’s piano lessons this month.”
“That’s pretty cool of you. Well, you take care, me and Rainbow Dash will be gone for awhile. Say hi to Dinky for me.”
“Will do. Bye girls!”
Overlord Rule No:49 If I learn the whereabouts of the one artefact which can destroy me, I will not send all my troops out to seize it. Instead I will send them out to seize something else and quietly put a Want-Ad in the local paper.
I like this
DAMN IT DERPY YOU KILLED US ALL!!!
I see what you're doing with this, but it's a risky business. This application of the Evil Overlord List will inevitably create a boring invincible villain. This is particularly problematic when said villain is applying the List to characters and settings we like. The correct antidote to this is comedy, and this just isn't funny enough at present.
Rule 33: Always pay mercenaries for their time when they have been absolutely professional in their endeavors
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6495436
I think that rather depends on whether you beleive the overlord to be the antagonist or the protagonist; and in this sort of story, it's intended to be the latter.
I'm finding it all pretty hilarious myself.
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True, but an invincible protagonist ain't all that hot either. That said, this fic is also clearly driven on gags, not plot or character, so I guess it doesn't matter much anyway.
Damn, this guy did his homework.
You realize, of course, that as soon as you finish this story I will be compelled to reread it in chronological order.
I loved the "Overlord" games so much! I'm glad you used it for the Cover Art.
Its got a follow from me at the moment, lets see if it can up into a fav.
I'm just hoping he gets defeated from a hefty kick to the bollocks myself.
YEEEEEES YEEEEEEES YAESSSSS
Good corollary to the list: Put out ads in the local paper each week for multiple random objects that are occasionally magical. That way a band of heroes still have a pretty low chance of finding the right artifact, even if they read the ads.
He better make sure he pays her for the work!
Don't put all your eggs into one basket.
Sending all your troops away regardless of the reason could leave you very vulnerable not to mention that it might be more effective to simply send a discrete and efficient agent to get the job done.
~Leonzilla
6495854 Now I wouldn't say that. The list itself was pretty much a bunch of gags. Facts, but funny ones. I can't wait to re-arrange this in chronological order to get a better picture of the story.
This rule is stupid. Better send a single capable soldier not a want ad.
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Ditzy owns whatever it is that is his one true weakness. Instead of making a big fuss about it and letting everybody know that it’s his one true weakness he put an innocuous want ad. in the newspaper. There’s no guarantee of securing the item via this method but it certainly doesn’t hurt to try this route first… especially since the heroes are all off on a wild goose chase.
Ditsy Doo is the new Daring Do.
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