Chronicles of an Evil Overlord

by Melancholy

Rule 90

Domination of Equestria - T+46 days.

Why… why am I helping them?
Maybe because even after everything you did they forgave you and befriended you?

That’s only after they turned up and screwed up everything, all of my plans. Our Town was great before they came along!
You know full well that it was crumbling long before they came. They just widened the cracks that were already there.

We could have overcome those problems in the end. All of Equestria would have been happier being equal, just look at the Overlord’s approval ratings.
It’s not hard to have 100% approval when those who disagree are mysteriously missing by the time the next census goes out.

Stop complaining, I’m here and I’m helping aren’t I?
You should also probably stop arguing with yourself and watch where you’re going.

Gods I’m so snarky sometimes.

So here I am, Starlight Glimmer, apprentice to the Princess of Friendship. I was out in the remote village of Our Town helping set up more local amenities when the Overlord struck Equestria.
With hindsight, I think Princess Twilight may have sent me out there deliberately.
But I’m back now, here in Canterlot looking to break out any pony I can. Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem to have gone well. Now I’m just running through all of these hallways desperately trying to avoid being caught by Changelings and Imperial Guard.

I need something like a closet, somewhere I can hide. Somewhere like…
Sewage Overflow. Bingo.

Slip in, slam the door. Listen in...hooves...many hooves...running past...aaaaaannnd...down the corridor.
I think I’m safe. Damnit Twilight, why do I have to feel indebted to you… Now I’m trapped in this stinking-
It doesn’t smell.
Huh?
It doesn’t smell of sewage. I think that’s...mint?
Oh Celestia, I’m right. Turn around Starlight…

That’s a lot of ponies. And a lot of computer terminals.

And an aweful lot of guns.

And is that-?
Yeup, that’s a bazooka.
Why in Tartarus do a bunch of desk jockeys have a bazooka!?

“Pardon me miss, I think you’re in the wrong place.”
“Thank you good Stallion, I think I am. Pardon me while I just leave all you busy ponies to it.”

“I don’t think so, Miss Glimmer.”
“Well Buck…”

“Open fire.”
Double buck.

Overlord Rule No: 90 I will not design my Main Control Room so that every workstation is facing away from the door.

Comments

[foxsevent]

You've done goofed, first it's "Starlight Glimmer" and later the soldier/worker says Ms. Shimmer as in Sunset Shimmer , two different ponies.

[Vigriff]

7553290 If I recall correctly, She died trying to diffuse a bomb only to set it off.

[Starblade]

“I don’t think so, Miss Shimmer.”

I think you meant, Miss Glimmer.

[Melancholy]

7553310 , 7553290
You saw nothing!

[SC_Orion]

That’s a lot of ponies. And a lot of computer terminals.
And an aweful lot of guns.
And is that-?
Yeup, that’s a bazooka.
Why in Tartarus do a bunch of desk jockeys have a bazooka!?

Say nerd one more time, I dare you.

[Georg]

Rule 90b - I will equip and train even the geekiest computer geeks and keyboard workers in my civil service to the standards of the regular military. Those who fail the marksmanship and endurance training will be used as targets for the next group of employees.
Rule 90c - Unauthorized entry to any secure area is expected to be followed by vigorous and accurate gunfire, directed at the unauthorized enter-er.

[Wise2Fox]

Mmmmm .... now here´s a question. Is there in the rules about other overlord´s trying to take over?

[KnightMysterio]

7553462 The words 'area nuke' come to mind.

[the_sane_maniac]

7553462 lets just say it's a very cut-throat business

[Eonflare]

Why was that door labelled 'Sewage Overflow'? I'm curious.

[Banana Boat]

7553716 The idea is that a sign labeled "KEEP OUT - MASTER CONTROL ROOM" might attract unwanted attention. Better to label it with something totally uninteresting, but still repulsive.

[shinhi]

7553716 its explained in a previous rule

[Leonzilla]

So the computer terminal was already constructed by day 46?

Impressive.

~Leonzilla

[ThatClosetBrony]

7553870 T+46, not T-46; Equestria has already been conquered for over a month.

[Leonzilla]

7553934 Yeah, I presume that means the control room was already fully settled and operational in less than a month and half after taking over on top of everything else.

I consider that impressive, I mean just think about all the steps:

You got to decide on a prime location, make the construction plans, build the facilities in complete secrecy, buy/build every little object you are going to want to put in there, hire assign and train the ponies who will be occupying it and make sure nothing goes wrong throughout the whole process while you manage all the other projects that have presumably already been planned in detail and have to be done ASAP right after taking over.

I find that level of productivity, accuracy and foresight impressive. One could say that level of skill it's practically super human at that point. Kinda like Batman.

~Leonzilla

[Bazing]

7553870 That's what it means to be an evil overlord. Get your shit done quick!

[ArchAngelGundam]

Well, so much for Starlight Glimmer. Looking forward to more.
Keep up the good work. Deus tecum.

[Muhanoid]

7553389 I once asked my boss if I may bring a grenade to work. Softball grenade. He said no.

[Wansdich]

7553716
http://www.fimfiction.net/story/292640/60/chronicles-of-an-evil-overlord/rule-65

[ChasingResonance]

7553389
Glad to see someone else got the reference. Onwards!

[Scarheart]

Thank God that Cousin Oliver was taken care of properly!

[Redrover17602]

What happened to the whole, "Starlight Glimmer can Teleport and fly with magic" Thing?

Good is dumb

[Redwolf777sg]

7553716
Well, putting a sign that's says Main Control Room or whatever is just too obvious. Misdirection.