On Through The Night
Come on.
Rarity focused a most unladylike glare on the small pile of grass, twigs and pine sitting innocuously in front of her in the dirt.
You are not going to beat me!
With a ferocious war-cry, she drove the two small sticks she held in her magic into the centre of the pile, spinning them into a frenzy of splinters.
It accomplished absolutely nothing.
With another cry, this time of frustration, Rarity flung the sticks away and fell back on her haunches with a huff. She saw her friends glancing worriedly at her, but ignored them–it was getting dark, she was tired, cold and an absolute mess, and to top it all off, couldn’t even start a simple fire! Why she had agreed to come on this camping trip she truly didn’t know. Especially without some of the bare necessities from last time, that her so-called-friends had insisted weren’t necessary! It wasn’t as if a portable dresser weighed that much.
Dust blew in swirls around her, and she sighed, all of her anger draining out with it.
She gave a glum look over at the meagre pile of kindling she had gathered. It was, it had to be said, a particularly sad looking pile. And if she was being honest, her foul mood was at least partially self-inflicted. After all, no one had forced her to come on this trip, although many would argue that a pleading Sweetie Belle was not something one could say no to. And she had chosen, despite the offers of help both Applejack and Twilight had given, to try and light a fire all on her own. What was she thinking?
Applejack may have a reputation for stubbornness, but you can certainly rival her you silly mare.
“Um, Rarity? Are you okay?”
She jumped as a timid voice startled her out of her reverie.
“Oh, Fluttershy! I’m sorry darling, I didn’t see you there.”
The shy pegasus had stepped back after Rarity’s outburst, but had clearly been standing quite close to her before hand.
“I’m sorry Rarity! I didn’t mean to frighten you, it’s just that you looked so sad and I just wanted to see if you were okay. You, um, seem to be fine, so I guess I’ll just go back over there now….”
“Oh no Fluttershy, don’t go, I was just, just…”
Rarity sighed again, slumping back down and staring despondently at the ground.
“Failing miserably at starting a fire. I suppose I should go back there and ask someone who knows what they’re doing.”
“Oh! Well, I could help you with that Rarity.”
Rarity blinked and looked back up at her friend. Gone was her usual timidness, and in its place, the gentle, motherly warmth that was usually reserved for her animals.
“It’s really rather easy once you know what to do. You’re nearly there – here, you just need a little more kindling, some slightly bigger sticks....”
Rarity watched in bemusement as Fluttershy quickly assembled a campfire with an ease that belied familiarity, all with the same easy smile on her face.
“Here you are!” beamed the yellow pegasus, as she returned with what appeared to Rarity to be at least eighteen different kinds of wood, leaves, moss, bark, twi—was that rope?
She gaped as Fluttershy cheerfully dropped the materials down by the pile of kindling. “Now then,” the pegasus began, “Let’s make a fire!”
The next half hour passed in a strange kind of blur for Rarity. Swathes of time spent whittling away at a log swept past, barely noticeable in the current, passed by and forgotten. But an instant, barely a fraction of a split-second, as Fluttershy guided her through putting this strange apparatus together and the sun caught her face just right – they would be forever engraved in her memory, carved as if on stone. She was never able to tell what it was that set them there – the memories themselves, or that sudden beautiful moment as they tested their creation, as first bright sparks of yellow, then a blossoming orange fire bloomed from the dull brown of the moss, like the core of some ancient world bursting at last through it’s seams.
“You did it Rarity! Oh, I knew you could!”
That moment that she would not admit to herself until long afterwards, many nights later in the warmth and safety of her own bed – when for all the beauty in the flames, in the life-affirming power that she had wielded just for that moment, Rarity had glanced at Fluttershy, at those long pink bangs and gentle smile and warm eyes that seemed to envelop you in love, and seen something more beautiful than she was prepared to face.
But that would come later. Now, the two mares laughed and whooped in a most unladylike fashion, their friends rushing over and joining in with congratulations and smiles all around, as the little flame began to grow.
*****
Pinkie Pie’s Barbecue Bonfire Bonanza Party was in full swing. All of Ponyville turned up for the Apple family’s yearly bonfire burnings anyway, and with the promise of a Pinkie Pie party added to the mix, no one had dared miss it this year.
Fluttershy scanned the increasingly raucous crowd – Applejack had decided to bring out the hard cider, and it was clear several ponies had already indulged a bit more than they should. Twilight Sparkle was doing something that possibly resembled dancing if you squinted right, while Rainbow Dash was passed out on a table. Others mingled, their laughing voices blending with the music of the band to create a bubbling symphony of joy that settled over the gathering like a fog.
The party had been more fun than she thought it would be. She had been nervous at first, as she always was, but the comforting presence of her friends had buoyed her, and she’d found herself smiling, laughing, and even quietly singing along to a few songs. But as the evening had wound on, and the festivities had grown wilder, she’d retreated a little – and so had someone else it seemed. Frowning, she realised that Rarity was nowhere to be found among the crowd.
Oh dear I hope she’s okay. What if she’s hurt? I’d better go find her.
Fluttershy braced herself, then began to gently make her way through the crowd, a chorus of meek “Oh, excuse me, I’m sorry”’s winding through the thrum of revelry. The presence of so many ponies closing in all around her, looming on every side – it still unsettled her, but she steeled herself as best she could and continued her search.
She was just beginning to panic, the familiar dread growing in the pit of her stomach, when she caught a flash of white and indigo out of the corner of her eye. Turning her head, she saw to her relief that Rarity was there, sitting alone by the fire. She frowned again, as she realised that Rarity really was alone – she sat apart from the rest of the party, on the other side of the fire. Nobody was even remotely close by, a circumstance that would normally have been quickly corrected by the burgeoning socialite. Fluttershy trotted over to her, and as her hoofsteps drew nearer Rarity looked up.
“Hello? Oh, Fluttershy darling!” she smiled at seeing her friend, “Is everything alright?”
“Oh, well,” Fluttershy began, “I was just wondering where you were. I couldn’t see you in the party, a-and then I saw you sitting here all alone and I just, um, wanted to see if you were okay.”
She shrunk into herself, continuing in a progressively smaller voice as Rarity frowned at her. This was a mistake, she thought to herself, I should have just left her to herself she doesn't want me here and—
“I'm sorry darling, I didn't mean to worry you. I assure you, I'm perfectly alright. I just... needed a little time to myself – away from the hustle and bustle as it were.” she laughed lightly, smiling. Fluttershy smiled back, allowing herself to relax as her worry drained away. Rarity beamed at her, and patted the space beside her with a hoof. “Come, sit next to me.”
Fluttershy hesitated, then cautiously sat down next to Rarity. “If you’d rather be alone I can g—”
“Nonsense! You’re my closest friend, of course I don’t mean you!”
Fluttershy stared at her, taken aback. “Y-your closest friend? You mean that?”
Rarity blinked, and then to Fluttershy’s astonishment, blushed.
“Ah, well I don’t mean anything against any of our other friends, I love them all dearly, but, well.” She stopped, closed her mouth, opened it again, and closed it again before finally speaking. “We share something – or at least I’d like to think we do.” She looked almost hesitantly over at the shocked Fluttershy from the corner of her eye. When she didn’t answer, Rarity grimaced and looked down. “I’m sorry, I’ve made you uncomfortable.”
“N-no! I mean, I, um, feel the same way.” Fluttershy blurted out, and then promptly flushed a beet red, smiling shyly at Rarity. Rarity looked surprised for a second, and then smiled warmly at her friend. They sat in silence for a while, simply enjoying each others company. After a while, Fluttershy, glanced to her right and cleared her throat slightly. Rarity looked at her, eyebrow raised questioningly.
“Um, Rarity?”
“Yes Fluttershy?”
“Why did you come out here? I-I mean you were just sitting here, all alone. You're usually so... involved. Didn’t you like the party?”
Rarity shook her head, smiling reassuringly. “Oh no, it’s nothing like that – anyway, Pinkie would have been on my tail in a heartbeat if I hadn’t been enjoying the party!” Fluttershy giggled a little at the mention of their pink friend, and Rarity continued, slightly wistfully. “It’s... well, it’s a little silly really.”
Fluttershy looked at her with renewed curiosity. “What is?”
Rarity bit her lip slightly. “Do you remember that camping trip when you helped me light a fire?” At Fluttershy’s nod, she looked away, gazing at the roaring fire in front of them. “There was a reason I wanted to do it, not just stubborn pride.” she said distantly, “There’s something about fire. The raw energy, the beauty; it's hard to explain. I’ve always found it fascinating – I remember just sitting in front of the fireplace entranced for hours as a filly.”
They both looked at the bonfire.
“Tell me.” Fluttershy spoke up suddenly, buoyed by a fierce, flaring confidence.
“Er, sorry?”
“Tell me.” Fluttershy repeated, gazing at Rarity with an intensity that startled herself, “Tell me what it is about fire that you love.”
Rarity leaned back, flustered. “Well, love is a rather strong wor—”
“Is it wrong?”
Fluttershy watched Rarity’s face, a strangely blank look crossing it as she processed her friends’ question, her mouth flapping like a fish. Eventually, she closed it and swallowed. “Well darling, it’s not the most interesting story,” she began weakly.
“I want to hear it though.” Fluttershy said in a quiet but insistent voice. Rarity might have hidden this from their other friends – she was certainly a talented actress – but beneath the bluster Fluttershy could see that this was something that truly mattered to her. And Fluttershy had spent far too much of her own life being afraid to show her own love for things to let Rarity hide this now.
Rarity swallowed again, and before an almost determined look came across her face. She sucked in a breath through her teeth and huffed, her breath creating a little cloud that dissipated into the cold night air.
“It’s difficult to explain.” She paused, Fluttershy waiting patiently, watching as the unicorn tried to gather her thoughts.
“Everything else,” Rarity began, slowly, hesitantly, “When you break it down, is something mundane. We’re all just skin and bone, the earth is just a lot of dirt, water is just another liquid but fire, fire is different. It’s not a solid or a liquid, it’s not air or gas of any kind, it just is.”
Fluttershy watched Rarity slowly drag her forehoof through the dust at her feet, carving strange spirals into the dirt. As she watched, as she heard her friends words and watched her sombre eyes begin to light up, her senses suddenly seemed to heighten. She saw the smiling, lively faces dancing and singing in the crowd, and she saw the embers thrown among them like dying stars.
“And what it is, is heat: the physical, visible incarnation of heat, of energy – its avatar if you will.”
She saw the flames climb into the night, licking at the stars, and the glowing coals nestled in the bonfire’s heart peeking out between the burning wood. She heard the crackle and roar as tongues of fire danced across the logs in blue and orange, saw the shadows dance across the fields of Sweet Apple Acres.
“And what is life but energy? Fire is power and heat and life and there is something so otherworldly about it and yet we all just take it for granted, fear it even.” Rarity had steadily grown more animated during her impassioned speech, movements becoming wild and without abandon, almost reaching a frenzy – but here the fire in her eyes dimmed, shoulders slumping back down.
“But then again, why should we not. I am praising fire as some life-giving force, but I suppose it’s silly to say that when it’s so destructive. Fire kills and burns after all – nothing but ashes left in the end, for all the beauty of the flames themselves.”
And Fluttershy understood, she suddenly understood what Rarity was trying to say, understood that the fire that burned in front of them was the same in Rarity’s mind as the fire that burned in her, the passion, the drive to create.
“I suppose it’s fitting that it inspires me – beautiful on the outside maybe, but destructive. Just like me. Nothing but ashes in the end.” Rarity stared morosely at the ground, deflated and a look of frustration on her face, the initial passion of her speech extinguished.
Fluttershy listened, and she understood. Then she spoke.
“You know, there was a forest fire about a year after I arrived here in Whitetail Woods.”
Rarity looked curiously over at her, but Fluttershy studiously ignored her, focusing instead on the flames in front of her.
“Some of my animal friends came and told me about it. Of course, I rushed over to help, and we were able to get a lot of creatures out, but the forest itself, their home – it was gone. I was so upset, so angry, that I just burst into tears, right there. I had no idea that one of the forest rangers was there as well, and that he had seen the whole thing as he helped to put out the fire. He came over to me, asked me if I was alright – oh it was so embarrassing, but he was so kind about it. I told him what was wrong, and do you know what he said to me?”
Rarity shook her head, entranced.
Fluttershy smiled – a small one, but unashamed. “He said, ’Miss, it may seem bad now. But that fire, it helped, in the long run. This forest will grow back – and stronger, better than before. Some of the plants and animals here, they need these fire occasionally. Come back here next year, Miss, and you’ll see.’ And he was right you know. It grew back. I still go back there every year, and it’s beautiful.” She turned to Rarity, whose eyes were glistening in the firelight, “Fire doesn't have to be bad. That destruction can be the seed of something even more beautiful.”
Rarity’s lip wobbled, and the serene calm and confidence that had been coursing through Fluttershy shattered. Her face fell, worry and doubt piercing through her mind again.
Oh no I’ve ruined everything, she’s even more upset now she must hate me an—
Her train of thought was cut off by as the white unicorn wailed and pulled her into a tight hug, and any attempts to place it back on the tracks were thoroughly derailed as Rarity kissed her.
She's kissing me!
For a scant moment, Fluttershy thought about pushing her friend away. This was strange, it was unexpected and scary and she didn't know what to do.
But another side of her won out. The side that said that Rarity was her oldest friend, her best friend. The one that was always there for her, the beautiful socialite who made time for a shy, silly little pegasus. The side that reminded her of those little glances she would sneak, of how much she always looked forward to their spa dates and—
And the side that reminded her of just how much she was enjoying this.
The next few seconds felt like hours, and what was left of Fluttershy’s thinking skills quickly gave up the ghost. She whined slightly as Rarity pulled away with a gasp, looking up at her with half-lidded eyes.
Rarity, conversely, was looking completely mortified.
“I’m so sorry Fluttershy I don’t know what came over me, I just—” she stopped dead as she suddenly noticed the shocked gaze of approximately the entire population of Ponyville looking in their direction, her eyes turning to pinpricks and her fur draining of what little colour it had. She gave a startlingly Fluttershy-esque noise and took a faltering step backwards – or would have if a yellow hoof had not grabbed hers and held it in place. She looked down to see her friend with a distinctly peeved look on her face. “Fluttershy, I’m sorry,” she repeated, before being cut off with a yelp as said friend yanked her back down on top of her. Her eyes bulged. “F-Fluttershy! What are yo—mmph!”
Fluttershy pulled back from the kiss. “I can be fiery too,” she whispered into Rarity’s ear before pulling her back down. The wide-eyed unicorn went beet red, stiffening for a moment in shock – then she melted. Behind them, cheers broke out among the crowd, but the couple didn’t hear a word of it. Tomorrow there would be conversations, confessions and the start of a life-long relationship. But for now, as the flames burned into the night, all they knew was each other.
*****
Rarity looked up as a soft knock came from her door. She frowned.
“Now who would be here at this hour?” she said to herself, before glancing out the window and adding “And in this weather?”
Shaking her head, she put down her needle and the piece of fabric she had been working on, chimed “I’m coming!”, and trotted over to the door.
She opened it to reveal what on first glance appeared to be a walking pile of wool, and on second was revealed to be a very warmly wrapped up pegasus, peeking out from under her hat at Rarity.
“Fluttershy! Come in, come in, you must be freezing!” Rarity threw open the door the rest of the way and ushered her inside. She stamped her boots on the welcome mat, shaking off snow and shivering slightly as Rarity used her magic to relieve her of her many layers.
“Not that it isn’t wonderful to see you darling,” Rarity began, “but I thought you were busy with your animals this time of year?”
“Oh, usually I am,” the Fluttershy replied, “but this year Discord offered to take over for me!”
Silence filled the main room of the Carousel Boutique. Slowly, a disbelieving eyebrow climbed it’s way up Rarity’s face. Fluttershy took no notice.
“Isn’t that wonderful?” she beamed at Rarity.
“Er, yes. Quite.” Rarity gave a brittle grin. Fluttershy quirked her head.
“What’s the matter?” her smile faltered a little, “If this is a bad time, I can go, it’s no trou—”
“Oh nonono, that’s not it at all Fluttershy!” Rarity added hastily, “It’s just, are you sure Discord can handle that?”
“Yes, I’m sure. He’s actually been helping me out for three or four years now, and he takes it very seriously.”
Rarity relaxed, “Oh good.” She smiled warmly over at Fluttershy “Well then, if you say he knows what he’s doing, I suppose I don’t see any problem with spending the evening with my beautiful wife.”
Fluttershy blushed, ducking behind her mane and smiling. She mumbled out something incomprehensible, then darted forward and pecked Rarity on the lips, before scampering towards the kitchen. Rarity chuckled slightly, walking after her at a more relaxed pace.
I’ll never get used to how wonderful that feels, she thought to herself as she trotted into the kitchen.
Fluttershy was there, making tea, bustling around the kitchen with a practiced ease and for a moment Rarity found it hard to breathe because there was something just so right about it all and-
“Are you okay?”
Rarity blinked and shook her head, then smiled reassuringly at Fluttershy. “Just fine dear. Better, now that you’re here.” she teased.
It got the reaction she was hoping for – Fluttershy blushed again, hastily turning around and throwing herself at the tea-making with perhaps a little too much fervour. She quickly finished up, and Rarity picked up the tray in her magic much to her wife’s protest, the two of them making their way to the small living room off from the main hall.
The room had originally been a simple storage area, but now housed several squashy armchairs, a coffee table, various knick-knacks, and most importantly, an old brick fireplace with a fire already blazing merrily within.
Rarity set down the tea tray on the coffee table, and began to pour two cups, dismissing Fluttershy’s protests and gently pushing her into a seat. Fluttershy huffed and pouted at her wife, a technique that had in the early days of their relationship immediately disabled all of Rarity’s thinking facilities – these days however she was more immune to her wife's charms, and instead stuck her tongue out at the pegasus, both of them lapsing into giggles at the silly expression.
She sat down with a sigh, easing herself back into the plush fabric of the chair. With a quick application of magic, one teacup floated itself over to Fluttershy while the other came to a rest just in front of her. Eyelids half closed, she gazed at the crackling fire.
“It’s nice to have some company, I must say. Usually Sweetie Belle stays with me for Hearth’s Warming, but this year she’s with mother and father. I suppose she’s seen them even less than usual this year.”
Fluttershy hummed in agreement. “It was so nice to hear that she’s been doing well though. I mean, she’s always had a wonderful talent, but I’ve heard the standards at Manehatten Academy can be quite harsh.”
Rarity perked up at that, smiling. “Oh yes, who would have ever though? My darling little sister at the most prestigious arts school in all of Equestria! I’m so proud of her.” she frowned a little, “I hope she knows that.”
“I’m sure she does Rarity – you’ve certainly mentioned it enough to me.” Fluttershy teased, a tiny grin curving up the corners of her mouth.
Rarity shot a mocking glare in Fluttershy’s direction, turning her nose up snootily at her wife and sending them both into another set of giggles. They soon lapsed into a comfortable silence, spreading out like a blanket across the room. The snow fell thick outside, coating the world in white through the window, and it looked to the two mares like nothing existed beyond the confines of this little room. The howling wind seemed held back only by the merry crackling of the fire, the flames dancing blue and yellow across the crumbling logs and casting flickering shadows across the walls and ceiling – a sentinel against the dark and the cold. There was no need for words between the two of them – here, in this place, at this time, there was nothing but the warmth of the fire and the pleasure of each other’s company.
*****
The fire burned, and Rarity watched the ashes of her life’s work drift away in the wind.
There was a loud crash, as another part of the Boutique gave up the fight against gravity and fell to earth, sending debris flying and scattering embers all around. She shivered, despite the heat rolling off of her home in waves, staring almost hypnotised at the skeletal rafters and the orange tongues that licked and battered at them. She heard, but did not register, the frantic calls of her name from somewhere behind her, the clamour of hooves drawing closer.
“RARITY!”
She turned, blinking to see her friends charging towards her, panic and concern etched across their faces, her wife leading the pack with a speed that not many would have expected the shy pegasus capable of.
“Oh,” she said distantly, “Hello darlings. I’m afraid I forgot to turn the oven off.”
It was at this point that the fragile remains of her psyche gave out, and she collapsed in a dead faint in front of her friends horrified faces.
***
Fluttershy couldn’t decide what was worse. Seeing her wife in such a distraught state, or seeing the reason for it: her beloved boutique, the business she had poured her heart and soul into, go literally up in flames. The wind bit at her, but she took no notice, cradling the unconscious Rarity and staring in horror and disbelief at the crumbling remains of the once beautiful building.
Her friends had split off. Twilight was helping put out the fire, while Applejack had dragged a protesting Pinkie Pie off to try and salvage something, anything from the wreckage. She appreciated it, in a distant kind of way – as much as she loved her friends, she wasn’t sure she could deal with Pinkie’s relentless optimism right now. Rainbow Dash sat across from her, an unsure and worried look on her face. Fluttershy couldn’t find it in herself to talk to her at that moment though.
A hoof fell on her shoulder, and she gave a start, turning her head to face the newcomer. It was one of the fireponies, face smeared with ash and soot, his bright blue eyes all the more startling for it. He looked sympathetically down at her.
“I know this is hard for you miss, but we should get her to a hospital,” he said, gesturing at Rarity, “She might have inhaled the smoke, it’s best to check her over.”
Fluttershy stared at him for a moment, uncomprehending. Rainbow Dash shifted slightly, calling out to her nervously.
“Er, Fluttershy?”
The yellow pegasus shook her head. “Right, o-of course. Um, Rainbow, could yo—?”
She was cut off as her rainbow-maned friend gently grasped Rarity’s hind legs, and the two lifted her off the ground. The firepony gave a nod to a co-worker, who quickly trotted over and began to lead the trio off towards the hospital. Behind them, the boutique continued to blaze. It was a clear night, but the billowing smoke seemed to be slowly snuffing out the stars, one by one.
***
Fluttershy wondered briefly if there was anyone, anyone at all, who actually liked hospitals. She certainly didn’t know anyone – even at the best of times, they felt gloomy and depressing, and at times like this…
Rarity lay on the bed, chest moving slowly as she slept. The doctors had found only minor smoke damage, enough to cause a cough for a few days, but nothing more. A few minor burns marred her coat, but she had thankfully not suffered anything worse. This was a cold comfort to Fluttershy though. She sat by the bed, stroking her sleeping wife’s hoof, staring unseeingly at the wall opposite.
What were they going to do?
She’s lost everything.
The boutique had been Rarity’s living, passion and life’s work, and now in an instant it had disappeared, vanished into smoke before their eyes.
What are we going to do?
She heard a weak cough to her side, her ears flicking up at the sounds. She turned her attention back towards the bed, watching anxiously as Rarity’s eyes flickered open. The unicorn blinked, staring in puzzlement at the ceiling for a second.
It was as if a switch had flipped. Fluttershy could see it – the exact moment Rarity remembered, the exact moment those beautiful blue eyes dulled with pain and anguish as everything came flooding back. The small, sharp intake of breath that accompanied it almost broke her heart.
Then Rarity sat up and looked at her.
“Is there… Is there anything left?” she trailed off, dread seeping through into her voice as she spoke.
Fluttershy bit her lip, feeling like her heart might burst. Applejack had searched through the night, but it has been fruitless. She shook her head.
Rarity tried, and failed, to stifle a sob, before something broke in her and she launched herself at her wife, weeping into the crook of her neck, front hooves grasped firmly around her.
This time there was no almost to Fluttershy’s breaking heart, as she felt the shuddering breaths of her wife through her chest and felt tears matt her fur. She stroked Rarity’s back with a shaking hoof.
“It’s okay. It will all be okay.” she whispered.
Whether she was trying to console her wife, or herself, she honestly couldn't tell.
*****
The chirping of birds through the open window filled the room as Rarity slowly drifted awake. The early morning sun bathed everything in a warm golden glow, and the unicorn smiled as she sat up, stretching slightly. She sighed as she felt something pop back into place.
I may not be a young mare any more, she thought to herself with satisfaction, But I can at least stay in shape.
A soft shifting sound to her right caused her to look over at her sleeping wife. She gave a fond smile as Fluttershy mumbled something into her pillow, before turning over and settling back down into slumber. Shaking her head, smile still in place, Rarity got up and trotted over to the dresser.
***
Rarity looked up from her newspaper as Fluttershy trudged into the kitchen, smiling at her and levitating a small china plate in her direction.
“Toast?” she asked cheerfully.
“You shou—” Fluttershy cut herself off with a yawn, scrunching up her eyes and lifting a hoof to her face, before shaking her head clear. Rarity hid a titter behind her hoof, earning a one eyed glare from her wife. “You should have woken me up!” she scolded, frowning at her wife and sitting down, wrapping her fluffy pink dressing gown around her with a huff.
“Oh well, you so rarely sleep in darling, and there isn’t anything in particular to do today, so—”
“Nothing to do!” Fluttershy exclaimed indignantly. “It’s the beginning of spring! I have to feed all the little animals, make sure there aren't any injured ones, clean u—”
“All of which you have people to help you with, dear,” Rarity cut in gently, looking over her glasses with an amused smile. “Little Zipporwhill is supposed to be your assistant you know. And I know full well that the two of you have done most of that already.”
Fluttershy frowned again. “But what about the commission? Lady Marigold wanted that dress this weekend! And we’ve got to get our Market stall ready for Tuesday as well, and—”
“And all of that can wait, dear. The dress is nearly finished, and we have plenty of time to get the stall ready.” Rarity countered again, still with her amused smile.
Fluttershy huffed again, scrunching her nose, before setting into her toast particularly violently.
Rarity set down her newspaper, shaking her head. “You know,” she began, “We are retired. Gods help me I never thought I’d be the one saying this, but you really should learn to relax a little.”
Fluttershy sighed and set down her toast, avoiding Rarity’s gaze. “I know. But I just worry, you know? What if Zippy can’t handle it? She’d be so upset, and all the poor animals would go hungry too. And I know how much the commissions and the stall mean to you, Rarity, and I’d hate for anything to go wrong.”
“I know darling. But we both know your assistant is a very capable young mare, and as for the dress work – it doesn't mean half as much to me as your happiness does.” Rarity rebuked gently, getting up and coming around the table. “Anyway,” she said slyly, giving her wife a quick kiss on the cheek, “How about I make it up to you? I hear the Cakes are serving a particularly scrumptious meringue pie today.”
Fluttershy rolled her eyes, blushing slightly at her wife’s affection, but perked up at the mention of her favourite confectionery, eyeing Rarity with a narrow gaze.
“What flavour?”
Hook, Line and…
“Lemon, I believe.” Rarity said with an innocent look at her wife.
...Sinker.
Fluttershy’s eyes widened.
“Wellthenwhatarewewaitingforlet’sgo!” she said in a rush. The table was cleared in a remarkably short span of time, and a yellow blur barrelled past Rarity, headed for the hall.
Chuckling, Rarity congratulated herself internally on a job well done, and went to get her scarf.
***
The two older mares ambled down the main road through Ponyville. The walk up from Fluttershy’s cottage – Our cottage, Rarity reminded herself, It’s our cottage now. – was a reasonably long one, and the regular trips into town had kept them in shape as they approached the end of middle age. They walked down the thoroughfare, taking in the bustle of the town, now considerably larger than when a bookish young unicorn has been sent to oversee the Summer Sun Celebration – the presence of a Princess had generated quite an influx into the place. Where before it had been barely larger than a village, now Ponyville was bordering on a city – but while there were many new faces, some were still familiar. As the pair stepped into Sugarcube corner, the mare at the counter looked up, breaking into a grin as she saw who it was.
“Rarity! Fluttershy! It’s so good to see you!”
The two of them smiled back at the beaming young mare. “You too, Pumpkin.” Rarity replied, “How are you?”
The orange maned unicorn beamed even bigger than before, if that were possible. “Oh I’m doing great! Business has been doing well recently – no thanks to my doofus of a brother.” She rolled her eyes. “I swear, he may be a genius with a baking tray, but if I left the business side of things to him we’d have gone bust years ago.”
“I heard that!” came a yell from the back.
“Good!” Pumpkin yelled back, “Maybe it’ll stop you from trying to do our taxes” she muttered, before turning back to the couple with a wry smile. Both Fluttershy and Rarity were clearly struggling to hold back their laughter.
“Ehehe. Why don’t you take a seat?” she said, gesturing a little sheepishly in the direction of the tables. The two nodded, not trusting themselves to speak, and trotted over to the far side of the cafe, sitting down beside the fireplace. They sat down, looked at each other, and promptly broke down into giggles, the very noticeable and steadily increasing redness of Pumpkin’s ears as she trotted over to their table only adding fuel to the fire. They just about managed to calm down as the embarrassed mare reached them, notepad at the ready.
“So, uh,” Pumpkin began, “Orders?”
Stifling another giggle, Rarity cleared her throat and turned to her. “I’ll have a spinach quiche please, and I do believe Fluttershy will have—”
“Do you have lemon meringue pie today?” Fluttershy cut in eagerly, leaning dangerously close to Pumpkin. The startled mare leaned back blinking.
“Err, yes? I can get you that Miss Fluttershy.” she replied nervously, notepad held like shield in front of her. Noticing her position, Fluttershy gave an “Eeep!” and quickly retreated to her seat, blushing furiously. Rarity gave a rather unladylike snort, and Pumpkin quickly recovered enough to grin knowingly.
“Anything else?” she asked.
“Just a pot of green tea please.” Rarity replied, still smirking at her gradually disappearing wife.
The young mare nodded and trotted off.
Rarity chuckled, looking over at the hint of pink mane that was all that could still be seen of Fluttershy. “You really are rather fond of that pie, aren’t you?”
A muffled groan came from somewhere under the table. Rarity chuckled again, and leaned back, looking over at the fire to her right. It had burned low overnight, the embers gently glowing and providing a pleasant warmth throughout the cafe. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Fluttershy slowly peek up over the edge of the table again. The yellow pegasus looked over to see what had caught her wife’s attention, and frowned slightly. Rarity quirked an eyebrow at her.
“Whatever is the matter dear?”
“Oh, it’s nothing important,” Fluttershy replied, although a slight downward tilt could still be seen at the corners of her mouth.
Now it was Rarity’s turn to frown. “Out with it darling.”
Fluttershy sighed, and turned to look Rarity straight in the eye. “Do you still think about it? The fire?”
There was silence for a few moments. Rarity opened her mouth to answer, but was interrupted by the arrival of their brunch. She smiled up at Pumpkin, then turned back to her wife as the young mare returned to the front of the shop.
“Honestly? Yes. Quite often in fact. But,” she stressed, as Fluttershy looked at her with a dismayed expression, on the brink of interrupting, “It really doesn’t bother me that much anymore. At least, not like it used to.”
She turned away, gazing out through the window on their left into the street, watching the ponies stream past. “You were right, you know.”
Fluttershy quirked her head, curious, although her face still held a hint of worry. “About what?”
“Afterwards, in the hospital, you told me that everything would be alright. And you were right.” she smiled, still gazing out the window, warming her hooves around her cup of tea. “Moving in with you was wonderful, even with all the heartache that preceded it. And who would have thought that my fashion lines would take off like that? Apparently all you need to succeed in the fashion world is scarcity and a sad story.” she laughed lightly. “And as thrilling as it was to enter the creme-de-la-creme of the fashion world,” here she turned back to Fluttershy, eyes warm and filled with love, “We might never have made a dress together if the fire hadn’t happened. Our little stall at the market might never have been. And I would have been a poorer mare for it.”
Fluttershy’s eyes glistened. She opened her mouth to reply, then closed it, turning to take in the sights of the town, just as Rarity had done. She smiled slightly.
“Me too.”
And although the words were not said, any passersby only had to look into the little bakery and catch a glimpse of the couple seated there to see “I love you” written in every inch of their souls.
*****
Fluttershy slowly drifted awake, blinking blearily in the morning sun. Her eyes weren’t quite what they used to be, and she had to squint as she fumbled for her glasses. She gave a quiet sigh of relief as she found them, and carefully placed them on her muzzle with a shaky hoof. She blinked a few times, brushing a few gray-and-pink hairs out of her face and looking around the bedroom. It was tidy and well kept, but a thin layer of dust covered a number of things that had clearly not been used in years – relics of a time long gone.
With a groan, Fluttershy hauled herself out of bed. The years had been kind to her, for the most part, but as she approached her ninth decade of life, her body was not quite what it had once been. Stretching, and wincing as her muscles protested, Fluttershy slowly made her way downstairs.
Reaching the kitchen, she busied herself with making breakfast and tea, carefully filling the kettle and getting some oats from the cupboard. Her ears flickered at a sound not unlike a hoover running backwards - another letter from Discord in the zebra lands no doubt. He was certainly enjoying his new role as ambassador. She set down the oats and reached up to take a bowl from a cupboard. However, as she gently lowered it down from the top shelf, her hoof fumbled, and the bowl fell to the ground with a loud crash, startling the yellow pegasus. She jerked back, breathing heavily and staring at the shards with wide eyes. She stood there for a few seconds, looking between the broken bowl and her hoof with an almost bewildered expression, before she closed her eyes, face settling into a wry smile.
“Would you look at that. See what a silly pony I am Rarity?”
She gave a soft laugh, and went to get the dustpan.
***
That evening, Fluttershy sank slowly into her favourite armchair by the fire, sighing with relief. The daily chores that had once seemed so easy now sapped the entire day, but she didn’t mind. It was the exercise, she reflected, that had probably kept her going so long. Although she no longer kept any animals around the house save for the great-great grandson of Opalescence, the garden she kept took up most of her day. She smiled, looking down at the fire and the purring cat in front of it, listening to the winter winds howling through the dark outside.
“Isn’t this nice Rarity?” she murmured, gazing unseeingly at the fire, “You always did like a good fire in the winter, didn’t you.”
She trailed off, the light from the flames flickering across her face.
“Yes. You always liked a good fire….”
The flames danced across the logs, the light casting long shadows into the far corners of the room as Fluttershy drifted into slumber.
***
“Miss Fluttershy!”
The young earth pony frowned, huffing in the cold, and rapped on the door again.
“Miss Fluttershy! It’s me, Applecrisp! I’m supposed to bring you up to the Acres today!”
She waited a while, ears pricked in vain for a response. She huffed again, stamping in place, and started off round the side of the little cottage. As she reached the window, she peeked through, and saw Fluttershy sitting in her armchair, the last embers in the fire behind her gently glowing. Her brow creased and she rolled her eyes.
“Miss Fluttershy! Come on, you’ve got to wake up, we’re going to be late again!”
Fluttershy didn’t stir. Applecrisp faltered a little, ears bending back.
“M-miss Fluttershy?”
Behind the still form of the pegasus, the fire guttered – once, twice, before the flames went still and finally died.
fin
So, I am actually alive.
No but seriously, I actually wrote something! And it's long! Miracles will never cease, it seems.
Even better, this has got me into rather a writing mood - I might tackle some of my longer projects, or even (horror of horrors) some of my other shipping "shorts". Would you believe this was meant to be 3000 words originally? And maybe it's full of cheesy lines and I just know there are rogue apostrophes everywhere, but I wrote over 7000 words in a rather short period of time. I'm quite proud of that.
Anyway, this is a (rather belated) birthday present for ThatOneWriter, my colleague and friend over in the YMLT group. Happy Birthday TOW. I hope you enjoyed it, and I hope you enjoyed this too. 
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Very, very nice
This is the first story I've read since almost a year on fimfiction, and I'm glad to have found it. This is definitely going on my fave list
Everything was perfect. Then ending was beautiful.
Thanks for writing this story :)
Oh wow. Wow. This is positively lovely. Just—wow.
Lovely writing, exquisite imagery, and I adore the role fire plays in the story. Please keep writing.
Okay, so, I'm gonna set aside everything I don't like about romance for a second..
AHEM....
I enjoyed this read
There were a lot of good set pieces in it, and I especially liked your ideas for how Ponyville sort of aged around the two mares. Now I want to read a story about Pumpkin and Pound Cake's adventures at odds with each other! The imagery with the fire was done very well, and the stuff about the forest fire being a purification for the future really resonated with me. I still remember the time I learned about fires being a natural part of a forest's life. It's stuck with me.
One thing I will say is that there was a lot of attribution for what they were doing. A lot of begans, smiles, head movements and the like that sort of kept taking me away from the dialogue and the story. I think you could have left a lot of those words out and gotten a better effect.
Anyways, I know you've said this is a kick to get you into writing again, and I'm very glad to hear it. Have you heard of the EFNW contest that's started up recently? I'm thinking of joining it, and I think your writing would suit the prompt.
5740205
I'm very glad you enjoyed it! And you are very welcome - I'm just glad I could make your return to fimfic a positive one.
5740420
Thank you!
Coming from you, that means a lot! I'm so glad you enjoyed it - I kind of consider you the standard for slightly convoluted romance stories (because Daring Do(esn't Need A Special Somepony) is genius), so for you to like it puts a huge smile on my face.
5740912
I wasn't expecting that. I'm glad that you could find something to enjoy in it despite your personal preference. 
I'm glad you liked Pound and Pumpkin, and the fire imagery. The twins appeared out of nowhere but I loved them instantly once they'd crystalised in my head - and the entire story was built out of the fire imagery. I had the title before anything else, and I got it from watching a fireplace and thinking "wow this is really pretty maybe I could write something about it".
Oh wow, you actually read this?
As for your criticisms - you make an excellent point. The reason for a lot of these movements is that stories often play out in my heads a bit like movies - what they are doing is just as important as what they are saying. Dialogue is also something of a weakness of mine, so I tried to use description and imagery more as it is something I'm stronger at. That said, I can see why you thought there was too much - I think I got a bit nervous about the reader not understanding what the characters were doing and went overboard. I'll keep it in mind for next time.
Also I hadn't heard of the contest (mainly because I'm not in place to go to any cons
), but it sounds good! It doesn't cover the deadline in the blog for some reason - but you're right about the prompt suiting me. I think I could definitely do something with that. Thanks for pointing me at it! 
5741783 Actually, that blog post just has too much information in it to find anything. About halfway through it says that entries are accepted until March 24th.
5742099
Ah, got it. Thanks!
5742419
"COME ON BABY LIGHT MY FIRE"
derpicdn.net/img/view/2013/5/8/320181__safe_solo_rarity_singing_microphone_spotlight_artist-colon-secoh2000.jpeg
5742481
Also:
th07.deviantart.net/fs70/PRE/i/2012/115/8/4/disturbed_pumpkin_cake_by_necronomiconofgod-d4xjpw5.png
5745015
Thank you for pointing that out!
....Well shit.
Nice
Sweet 
Sad 
5749562
Thanks.
You're stories are like the songs of Ponyphonic. We only get like 1 or 2 a year, but theyr'e always worth the wait.
5750505
And thanks for the fave too.
Being a big fan of ponyphonic, holy shit that's one hell of a compliment. Thanks proto.
Also I may be writing more in the near future. As in the next week.
This... story... is so touching... *Bawls.* Fave, thumbs up, download!
5833914
Thank you so much for the high praise! I'm glad you could enjoy it so much.
A bit rough around some edges; specifically, the dialogue and the POV felt just out of character at times. But the fire theme was strong and actually really deep, so I guess that makes up for it.
5854538
Oh wow thank you! I'm glad you could like it despite it's flaws - this was a rather rushed piece, and I'm a pretty unpolished writer, so I'm not surprised there were issues. Thank you for favouriting it anyway - and I'm glad you liked the fire theme.
Whose dialogue/POV felt out of character? And what specifically about it? I suspect it was probably Rarity - I'd love any input you're willing to share!
5857158
NATURALLY, THE FOLLOWING CONTAINS SPOILERS!
Alright, then let's take a closer look and maybe go a teensy bit into detail. *writes wall of text* The tiniest of bits.
The first scene I'd say is good as it is. What put me off was the part after that.
It starts with the first paragraph, which is long and messy and where you can easily miss the viewpoint change. Then we have:
Since "the unicorn" is the subject of the first sentence, you might assume that she's also referred to by the pronoun in the second one. It's happening again later.
After starting off with those little confusions, the POV is barely used. I had to remind myself multiple times whose perspective it is, and while dialogue-heavy scenes like this have a tendency towards those shortcomings, it doesn't exactly help that you focus so much on what Rarity does. One line is pretty interesting:
Aside from the fact that you didn't capitalize the "she" (you might want to do a little research on said-tags and punctuation of dialogue). What you do here feels like describing Rarity's POV through Fluttershy's; Rarity percieves Fluttershy relaxing and reacts by smiling.
It gets better towards the end of the scene. But then comes the big bang.
First of all, tackling somepony down and kissing them without any warning if you don't know if they actually want that is not romantic, it's sexual harassment. I know that commercial mainstream romance is putting really bad examples, but honestly, I don't think it's anything Rarity would do. Especially since she doesn't even seem to expect her feelings being returned.
No. Just no.
Then we get Rarity's POV in disguise. No Fluttershy POV at all beyond that point.
This was the point where I actually wanted to give it a dislike. The rest I believe is better, but no guarantees, since I'll not analyze the whole thing.
I must say though, now that I've been consciously paying attention to character voice and POV, that most of it is actually really well-done.
So, let's look at some of Fluttershy's dialogue next:
This doesn't seem to me like something Fluttershy would ask. She's not that invasive, is she?
Same as above. She might offer to listen, or kindly ask, but I can't see her using the imperative there. Not to mention that she'd never "gaze with a startling intensity" aside from using the stare.
I checked on Rarity's dialogue as well just to be sure, but it's good, with only one thing I found to pick at:
"I don't know", doesn't seem to me like a phrase Rarity would be using.
And now that I'm at it, I might as well mention the other details that stroke me.
First of all, it's considered bad style to write things like "the white unicorn" or "the shy pegasus". I'm just proud that you didn't write "the fashionista", but really, if you've ever heard of that term: this is what's meant by "lavender unicorn syndrome".
Another thing is Fluttershy's stuttering. It's completely legitimate to write "A-are you okay?" when she's actually startled or nervous or something, but try not to overdo it or it'll get annoying. Same with fillers like "um" and "oh".
One last thing, you can't use "smile" as a said-tag; you don't smile "I'd like a cappuccino, please" to the waiter but you say it, right?
That's all that comes to my mind right now. And yes, it's true, I did enjoy the story in the end; I probably should have mentioned that in my comment. I like stories in which you see the ship growing old and dying, and even from the technical side it's not at all bad.
5858744
You. Are. Awesome.
Thank you so much for taking the time to do this. As a writer I really appreciate the feedback, and as an editor I admire your thoroughness.
Now: I am going to argue back on some of these points. Please don't take this as the "this is my story, I'll do what I want!" attitude that I've seen some writers take. Rather, I am simply providing counter points to some of yours, and I would love to hear what counter-counter points you have to mine.
I have nothing to say to this other than that you are absolutely right - the POV here is a mess. Thank you for focusing my attention on it.
I'm not sure I entirely agree with you here. While tackling may perhaps have been over the top, I find it hard to believe that simply kissing someone if you don't know whether they want it is sexual harassment - if that were the case, I doubt many romances/relationships would have ever started. Kissing someone who clearly doesn't want to be kissed? Definitely not good. Kissing someone again if they are not receptive of your initial advances? Also not good.
But saying that kissing someone to express your attraction to them is sexual harassment doesn't seem quite right to me. I'm not of course saying that that was your message - if I simply didn't convey that this was the situation in the text, then that is definitely something to fix.
Eheheh. Yeaaaaah, it's pretty clear I don't have much experience in this field, huh?
That's pretty much the only thing I can say in my defence about this line, as well as the fact that I was attempting to make this section as sappy as possible. On reflection, this line was a terrible idea, and I will fix it ASAP.
I'll have a look at this, but I think it was more that I left Fluttershy's POV behind and tried to focus on both of them from a third-person perspective. Obviously I didn't do this very well - another thing I will revisit.
Here is the first place where I really must disagree. Perhaps the first line of dialogue doesn't feel quite in character, but your overall point about Fluttershy I'm not sure I agree with - in this context. Yes, Fluttershy is absolutely not the kind of person to normally be assertive or really speak up at all. But we've also seen that she can be very assertive, even passionate, on both the rare occaisions when she loses her temper, and - more importantly for this example - when she is confronting something to do with those she cares about. Be it her friends or her animals, Fluttershy has a hidden well of strength when it comes to helping them. In this scenario, while I agree that perhaps the first example is a little too invasive for a simple conversation between friends, she is worried for Rarity - her friends is acting very abnormally, as she would normally be right in the thick of things, the socialite that she is. Instead she is sitting alone off to the side, and that worries Fluttershy a little. In the second example - well, Rarity is clearly very troubled about something, and on the verge of telling her what it is. As I said earlier, when it comes to her friends, Fluttershy can be very assertive.
...Or at least that's how I see it. Sorry for the wall of text.
Hmm. I can see her using it, but I do agree that there are things that would be more in character for Rarity. I'll have a look at it.
I have indeed heard of Lavender Unicorn Syndrome, and even as I published this I was slightly aware that I may have used those terms a bit too much. What I will say in my defence is that this was a rather rushed piece - I was trying to write it for someone's birthday, and I was rather late on that front. As for why I used so many of those in the first place - well, using "Rarity said" or "Fluttershy said" all the time can be almost as bad as full-blown LUS, and the way I was writing this using "she" constantly would have become confusing fast.
That said, as far as I'm aware LUS refers more to the overuse of these terms - using them sparingly doesn't seem like it would be that bad. As I said though, I did probably overuse them a little here (though I don't think I went full terribad), and I'll have a go at cutting some of these.
Huh. I didn't think I'd been that bad with this. I'll cut it down.
Now see, I know that this is a style thing. Grammatically it's not really correct, but it is used in writing. I'll find where I've used it and have another look, but I might not change this one if I really like how it works in that context.
Apologies for the massive wall of text - and I'm glad you enjoyed reading it, even with the issues.
5860063
Well, if anyone did that to me, even a friend, I'd be freaked. Maybe talking too much can be boring in a story (depends on the pacing I guess), but there's always the more careful route of slowly approaching the other one to see how they react. It's just important that the intentions are clear and the feedback is positive, otherwise I would consider it indeed harassment. And even if you feel differently about that, others around you might not, so in all seriousness, I wouldn't advise you to try and kiss someone just like that (we're talking first time!). Respect people's comfort zones, please, for their sake if not your own.
But that only as a side note, as it has nothing to do with the actual technical stuff that we were talking about.
That you've succeeded in! And, well, I'm all down for sappy romance, but I don't think it really fits your style in this.
That's true, and I get that she really wants Rarity to tell her, so I don't think she would be shy or vague or undetermined here. But, just those two words, that's really direct; it's the way I'd expect Rainbow Dash to ask, or even Rarity, but not Shy. And, like I said, staring until Rarity is startled? Maybe it's just me getting it the wrong way, I can't rule that out; it's just something that definitely stroke me when I read it. But I don't think it's a huge issue either way.
Do that; you might be surprised. I mean, it's not as bad as some things I've already read, but as a rule it's usually considered to be bad to have any of those with very few exceptions, like, to emphasize distance ("Dash narrowed her eyes searching the skies for Twilight, and indeed; the purple alicorn appeared in between two clouds, heading straight for her home.") or to signal relationships with the viewpoint character ("But Luna seemed to be unharmed; with a sigh of relief, Celestia rushed forwards to hug her sister."). I don't know how much you could argue that it can be a part of the style, but usually, before you can break rules you have to follow and understand them, so it might be helpful to perhaps just hunt them down for testing purposes, or at least think really carefully about why you would or wouldn't want them. Same goes for the "smiled" thing.
5870276
Don't worry - I'm far too shy to do this!
In all seriousness, you're right. I know I would feel extremely uncomfortable if I was subjected to this, and I couldn't see myself doing it to someone else either.
But, I still don't think it's sexual harassment. A bad idea? Yes. It isn't something I would do, like I said, and I can see it turning out quite badly. And if you kiss someone, and prevent them from trying to pull away, or do it when they clearly don't want to, that is indeed sexual harassment. Kissing someone out of the blue on the other hand merely seems naive - but it is something I can see Rarity doing. She is after all enamoured with the idea of romance - I could see her getting many ideas from cheesy terrible romance novels - and on top of that is an extremely passionate person. With both the kind of person she is and her own (perhaps naive) preconceptions of romance, I could see her doing this. As (I hope) I showed, she is mortified by her own actions immediately afterwards, and what keeps things going is Fluttershy's own positive response.
Anyway, other than that, I've fixed a lot of the things we discussed and tweaked some of the scenes as well - and also found a laundry list of typos while I was doing so.
The "Tell me" bit is still there, but I think I've clarified it a little - same with the kiss at the end of that same scene. I've cut down quite a few of the "pegasus"'s and "unicorn"'s, but there are still some throughout the piece.
I think this should be better now - and I found a way to tie it back to the fire theme as well!
Even when I try to write sappy stuff, I can't resist making it serious.
Yeah, as you can probably tell sappy romance is not the normal topic of my writing.
Again, I'd love to hear what you think now that I've made a few tweaks - the only bit that maybe I haven't changed quite enough is the section you described as "Rarity's POV in disguise", but I think I've made it clearer that it's sort of supposed to be a more third person perspective, shifting away from Fluttershy to an outside point of view. I'd also be interested to hear what you think of "Rarity being the sort of person to
sexually harasskiss people without much warning."Great job.........no I mean it this was great. Its starting to honestly astound me what I find on this site. I really liked the twist yet predictable moments (called the boutique burning down). Flaws.... well a couple
1: time jumps were a little bigger than expected, I mean it went from a month to 4 years to 20 years to 50 years, but alas its a minor complaint
2: the ending, now I thought the ending was great but I think fluttershy dieing while applejacks granddaughter watching & the fire going out seemed a bit forced (also, she had no family with her at all? I don't think I buy that)
But these are really just minor complaints on otherwise the best rarishy fic (and one of the best fics overall) I've read on this site
6091046
Thank you very much for the kind words, and for the feedback! I'm glad you enjoyed it.
As for what you said:
1: The Timeskips.
I see what you mean, but I think for the story I was trying to tell here, the longer timeskips were better. I decided to go for the important moments, as it were, rather than a set jump of say, 10 years or so.
2: The Ending.
You're absolutely right - but that wasn't really the point. The ending was supposed to be more symbolism significant than anything else - as a narrative ending, yes it could perhaps have been a little stronger. But I like the way it ties everything together.
If you have any other questions/points to raise, please do - I'm always happy to discuss this stuff with people.
5857158
Hey, Meridian! Sorry for not leaving any comments earlier and I noticed your message way to late.
I loved this fic and despite being a huuuge Rarijack fan, I have no problem enjoying other Rarity shippings. Especially not when they are as cute and romatic as this one. I loved the idea of letting the reader follow through a series of key point in Rarity and Fluttershy's life like that and how you made fire a theme throughout the story.
You really put some effort into the dialogue and I loved every part of interaction between the two, it had a lot of feelings behind it and despite the sad yet beautiful ending I finished reading this with a huge smile upon my lips. A few tears later and I quickly added this to my fave list.
Lovely work and thanks for sharing such a beautiful story with us. You should really write more fiction with Rarity, you really handled her very well. *Hugs*
6271972
Hi there! Thanks for taking the time to comment - even if it is late, it's still very much appreciated.
So, to answer a few of your comments:
I'll let you in on a little secret - I'm a much bigger Rarijack and Raridash fan than Rarishy. But I've always looked at shipping as more of a scale than anything else: there are some I like more than others, but there are very few I actually dislike.
Thank you! Those two things were really the backbone of the entire story. My plan before writing was "sappy Rarishy with fire symbolism", and the first thing I did when I actually started writing was put in this "key moments" structure. So I'm glad you noticed that.
You say the sweetest things.
I want toooo!
So many ideas, so little time.
6273662
Oh, hello again, darling.
I agree with you to at least some degree, Rarijack is frickin' adorable to me but I've learned to like most shippings if they're handled in the right way or like in this case, written very well. Not long ago I was a frequent hater of the Sparity Ship but when I stumbled upon the fantastic Kilala97's faniverse I was so taken by her art and ideas. She did Sparity in just the right way for someone like me to enjoy and if you haven't checked her stuff out, do it. Do it now!
Well, I think you did something unique here. When I saw the title of the fic I took it for just a fancy title but it wasn't hard to take notice of what was the theme for the story. I really enjoy romantic and sappy stories every now and then, and this had some really sweet moments in it and I must admit I really liked the bonfire scene. Rarity being the one to make the move and kiss Fluttershy was sweet and I think it suited her character, as you stated in another comment;
, so personally, I think you did a good job with that one.
*Blush*
Erh... h-hehe, well... you deserved the praise, hun. 
Don't worry about it. I understand what you mean and I know it's hard to find time for everything, no pressure. But I hope to see you write more fics when you got the time, till then you got yourself another follower.
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I believe I have seen her stuff (although I do like the sparity ship anyway
).
I repeat - you say the sweetest things!
But yes, the title was actually something I put a decent amount of thought into - I prefer when my titles actually mean something (I did the same with my first story, and my most recent one is a rather silly reference). And I'm glad you like my interpretation of the character too! She's quite a complex one, but that makes her all the more interesting.
Thank you! I hope I will make it worth your while in the future.
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Hey, sorry if I keep bugging you, darling.
Okay, that's cool. I think Kilala deserve the attention for her next gen characters and whatnot. She is talented and her drawings are super cute, anyways... I know I said I was a hater of Sparity but maybe hater was a bit strong. I knew there was a lot of Sparity fans out there but I wasn't really a fan about the whole idea of shipping Rarity with a baby dragon, I mean, he's a baby!
But I learned to accept that we all have our favorite shippings and whatever floats your boat, right? But as I mentioned, Kilala's faniverse with the boyishly handsome and grown up Spike and his relationship with Rarity was amazing, and their kids...
It was enough to make me see just how adorable the Sparity ship could be when it was handled well.
Oh, she sure is. But that is also one of the many reasons why Rarity is my favorite character, and I really enjoy to see how different authors imagine her to think, behave or act. Like you said, she's complex.
Heh, I have no doubt, dear. But as I said, no pressure, art can not be stressed. And again, sorry for bugging you repeatedly, I just got a bit overwhelmed by your friendly replies and I enjoy talking to authors and fellow pony fans a lot. I've met so many wonderful people since I joined the fandom and I treasure those encounters in which I am able to disscuss something I love within the fandom, like fanart, fictions, ships or headcanons... even clop... *Ahem* without being afraid to start a flamewar or getting into a pointless argue, you know? So thanks for your replies and for being awesome in general.
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I should really be the one thanking you - and have no fear about bugging me either! I've been enjoying our little conversation.
I understand completely where you're coming from - it's why I always try and be friendly with people who actually come and take the time to read what I have written. As we've both just seen, sometimes it can spark up quite a nice conversation! And it really is fun to discuss things you enjoy without fear of mindless bickering starting up.
But seriously, thank you for all your feedback, and please don't think you were bugging me. One thing that has truly stood out about this fandom to me (despite the many, many people who would say something to the contrary) is how open and friendly people are, and I'm glad I could continue that tradition.
Took me for-freaking-ever to get to it, but thank you for writing this, Meri! It's a sweet little story (well, minus the sad part in the middle).
Also, old couple Fluttershy and Rarity are adorable.
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I'm so glad you enjoyed it! I did write it for you after all.
No but seriously. Glad you liked it mate.
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The world needs more RariShy. I'd right that wrong myself, but I'm lazy.
Well, now you know that a good gift for my birthday is pretty much any kind of Fluttershipping. You've still got three and a half months to think up a new one! :P
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Well I'm glad you liked it, even if it made you cry...
A very nice piece of Flarity and nice prose to boot.
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Why thank you! It's been a long time since I wrote this and I'd like to think I've improved since, but it was the first thing I wrote with any real length to it, so I'm happy to see it still stands up to scrutiny!
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Indeed it does! I've seen you around for a while; I didn't realize you actually had a few stories, though. I figured it was time to give a few a read, since I tend to read a little of everyone here and there. Or, almost everyone.
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And I often find an author I've been meaning to give a look for a while and just binge a few of their stories, so it's kind of flattering to be on the other side of that.
I know the feeling! As my ridiculous favourites list may reveal, I am definitely in the habit of dabbling here and there.
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Crap, we have the same reading habits. This calls for a duel or somethin'.