When a blizzard descended upon the Crystal Empire, everypony felt their fear of the unknown return. Twilight and her friends were instantly on the next train, and found the Crystal Empire almost as if it had never been saved in the first place. Fortunately, the crystal ponies were standing strong against the onslaught, and their city was not in danger.
That did not mean Twilight was not in her own danger, as she walked the short distance to the protected part of the capital.
Hmm, it's well written, but I don't think I can form an opinion yet based on what's here.
Tentatively waiting for more in that case :)
It could use an editor and be a bit more fleshed out, but otherwise nice job so far.
5092721
are you volunteering
Is this a Sombra and Twilight pairing story? What is the pairing called anyway?
5093041 Quite possibly, but I don't know how...
5093156
Just quote the errors and then say how you think they should be fixed.
No.
Not sure what it's called, probably Somtwi or Twisom.
5093228
Uh
Even when he's cut off from his magic, sombra still a badass.
Pinkie pie was a pink bundle of energy
Running in one direction did not bringt it up
she saw a sparkle of pin through the snow
1. Forgot to capitalise.
2. Bring.
3. Pink.
5095686
And thus, all is right with the world.
esh! Sombra Cant u at least try to be nice, I mean even Discord could do better then u.
5098972
Evil, remember?
Yesssss.
This chapter, just.. YESSSS.
I like to see that Sombra has no intention of changing any time soon.Pinkamina shall be unleashed...
Twilight said "Twlight" alot. SO MANY TWILIGHT'S! Oh and that picture. Nightmare fuel. GAAAAAHHHH!!! I can't sleep now. I'm afraid I'm gonna close my eyes and she's gonna murder me. In the most painful way possible!
Some of the gram is horrible, but overall the story line is great.
I'll give u 4 Pinkie Pie heads
I will give u one more if the gramer was a little better.
5103937
Sorry, I do try.
I had an awesome duel once with a guy named Cheeze Sandwitch, great guy you should totally meet him.
There was that time that she went to that fashion so but that was sooo boring
Sitting back down, he began to cut his cake delicately, and eat it
Twilight was please to see Sombra nod
1. A guy named Cheese Sandwich. Great guy, you should totally meet him.
2. Show.
3. Hmm... Conflicted if this should be Ate...
4. Pleased.
Instakill.
Her horn cracked, and turned red, loosing the circular pattern all unicorns were born with
1. Losing.
Rule one about an evil villain in your room Twilight, be suspicious about everything. Paper nightmares me thinks. Possibly.
5105439
Maybe AJ maybe.....Nah! He was in the wrong HE HIT A GIRL! A child for that matter!

5106427
Yeah, Sombra pretty much walked into that one
5106442
wow Sombra actually did something good for once because AJ told Bloom not to get too close and she did, so the only way to back her up was to push her back. Good job Sombra, for trying to be good.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Also u should have one chapter with Sombra's side of the story when he used to be Prince Sombra.
So... Applejack has no problem killing him I assume? Seeing as she's being so casual about no point in reforming a dead pony.
Applebloom needs to be tougher too. I mean, she's been in worse and a bruised cheek can give her a concussion? Really? She's been in far worse with her Crusader escapades
5107368
I said slight, I guess I worded it wrong. I mean it as she is slightly dazed by the blow, and a little out of it, discombobulated,frazzled.
Isn't Twilight's Castle made up of Crystals
5111848
Yeah, but he can't exactly go home to go out.
Ah’ll see you this arvo
Uhh... What's arvo?
Wow!
5113763
Auzzie slang for afternoon.
Okay so, she literally took off her head!
5115216
Whoops
I always though Sombra's cutie mark would be crystals.
5115325
Well it makes sense, considering almost all his mlp cannon lines are about crystals.
5115332 Sombra found his comfort Zone by drinking hot chocolate.
5115674

The nurse smile, and indicated he should try sitting
1. Smiled.
No one can resist the power of Hot Chocolate!
...
Save for those that are lactose intolerant though
And Twilight man... Didn't think she was one for destroying perfectly good money...
Tsk, tsk...
5116438
What do you mean destroying money?
5116481 Oh wait, I done derped
I depredations up here thinking she destroyed the money. And I missed this, it should be Show
5116550

5116550
Depredations... Stupid auto correct
5116659
Sure, blame the auto-correct
This Is some Bullshit
5117491 I am sorry you feel that way, but you are entitled to your opinion.
Pikie cant die
She's immortal
5117503
new4.fjcdn.com/comments/300+_ae1560895d22f1875efbb85a444dbb26.jpg
5117326 I do, it has more than once made a situation skewed.
“You’re right, she spoke, catching him off guard.
1. Forgot your closing quotation mark.
Suddenly Sombra wanting to enslave Twilight. I'm okay with this surprisingly.
5117520

5117523 now I remember what I wanted to originally say!
Depredations was supposed to be Misread.
Blarg