Frolestia

by LoneUnicornWriter

Why won't they tell me?

It was nice day in Canterlot. The birds whistled beautiful tunes from the trees. Little foals were able to play up and down the streets. Pegasi flew about freely through the clear skies. The sun shone beautifully throughout the city giving warmth to all the plants, and animals, and to all ponies making it a perfect day for everyone to enjoy themselves.

The sun had also shone through the large windows of the throne room of Canterlot Castle. The guards were in their aligned positions. Celestia loved every morning and enjoyed making sure that everything was done well.

But that morning however, she left the castle for a change of scenery and to fly around for a bit. She didn't go far before she got caught in group of clouds that were drizzling. She became soaked with the rain, but when the water dried up her flowing mane became a giant afro which cover a good portion of her entire body.

Celestia didn’t really care much for her condition, but her beloved city and her castle did. When she flew across her city the ponies looked up and laughed. Celestia however was too high to hear any of the laughter the ponies did. She flew in front of her castle comfortably even though the guards that looked at her gave her an odd stare.

One guard leaned over to another saying, “Is that… Princess Celestia?”

“Maybe so… I think so?” the other guarded said raising an eyebrow.

When she had trotted into Canterlot Castle, that's when everything changed...

Celestia entered the gates of her kingdom the first two soldiers and stood agaped in front of her.

"Is there something wrong gentlemen?" Celestia raised an eyebrow at them both.

"Umm, your highness uh..." One royal guard looked confused at the other.

"What happened to uhh..." the guard dropped his teeth onto his lower lips and held it tight.

"To What?" Celestia pressed them for the answer.

"Actually uh... Princess Luna wants you," one guard grinned awkwardly.

"Yes, Princess Luna wants you immediately for..." The other guard scratched his neck.

“For?”Celestia kept staring at them.

“She didn’t say your highness,” both kneeled before her hiding their smiles.

“Didn’t say huh? It is unlike my sister to send for me without telling you what for, but I shall go.”

She trotted off to see what Luna would’ve wanted from her. She traveled the long halls of the Castle confused as to why her soldiers stared at her in weird manner.

“Are they hiding something from me?” Celestia thought aloud. When Celestia saw Raven reading through some of her royal duty scrolls, she quickly galloped behind her.

“Good morning Raven, I see you have…”

“Oh yes your highness, your duty scroollls!” Raven leaped backwards knocking the stacks of scrolls down to the floor.

“What’s wrong Raven?”

“Uhh… your highness. Uhh…” Raven began to shiver.

“Out with it. I haven’t got all day!” Raven dashed down the hall upon Celestia trotting closer to her.

“All right, this is ridiculous. How could my subjects be afraid of me? What could I have done wrong?” Celestia continued on to her sister’s room.

Celestia knocked on the door and Luna came out with a yawn.

“What is it dear, sis-?” Luna eyes widened.

“All right Luna, don’t lie to me. Tell me what’s wrong.”

“What has happened to thine hair?”

“Oh… so that is what my servants were… I get it,” Celestia’s eyes narrowed and then began to frown.

“What I don’t get is why they couldn’t tell me that?” she stomped her hoof and pouted her cheeks.

“I know not why sister, but you don’t go out of the castle much either for these cases to occur.”

“You’re right… I’ll just shower up then. Did you need me for something Luna?”

“Needeth you for what?” Luna held a hoof up in confusion.

Celestia stared at her for a few moments. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes.

“And they lied to me…” Celestia turned and trotted away from Luna to the shower room.

After Princess Celestia came from showering, she went to the throne room. Where all the guards stood in aligned positions. They all bowed as she trotted over to the throne and sat comfortably.

She then glanced at all her subjects with a cunning smile.

“Fetch me, the two guards that were guarding the two front doors please.”

“I’ll do it your highness,” one pegasus guard said before leaving the throne room.

Thirty minutes passed when the pegasus guard returned with the two appointed guards.

“Here they are your highness,” The guard returned to his appointed spot.

Celestia rose from her throne and took her time and trotted down the red carpet towards the two guards. Her eyes were narrowed, but she still kept a cunning smile which made both of the guards nervous.

“Umm… is there something wrong your highness?” Their eyes swayed towards each other then back at Celestia.

“You guys like lying to your leader is that?”

“Well we didn’t want to uh…” Their attention veered off to the side as she came closer.

“Don’t start with stuttering. I am not in the mood,” Celestia glared at them.

“We didn’t want to tell you how bad your hair was, your highness. My deepest apologies for committing such a terrible act” one guard said kneeling again before the princess.

“And I didn’t want to laugh at how dumb you looked!” the other guard laughed on the ground besides his partner. The others looked at the guard as though he were mad. Celestia however began laughing on with him.

“Ahaha, and I didn’t want to laugh at how dumb you will look when I fire you, but I guess I’m doing that already am I!”

“Wait, what?” the guard looked up dumbfounded.

“Leave,” Celestia frowned gesturing the guard to leave the castle.

Comments

[Witchery]

Who gave this a dislike? The idea alone is worth a like.

[juter4397]

This definitely going to be something in my ponyfic.

[Dash The Stampede]

Brilliant idea!
...
Not-so-perfect execution.

Hear me out:
I like to punish Celestia as much as the next guy, but your Celly...she's a little "teenagery", bossing others and laughing at their misfortune at her hooves. Naturally, that's where we might believe the random tag, but that's just one small thing.
You also don't really describe her hair, one sentence about it poofing up, and only really allowing us to see it in the cover pic. I feel that's a huge case of show and no tell. I'd like to see this as a thing, but it's a little feeble in constitution. Throw some choice descriptors in there and we'll see a better reaction and more chuckles. In comedy, it's all about the execution- punchlines at the right times, wording the characters a certain way, I could go on, but most importantly, you want to keep care to describe enough so the joke makes sense to us.

But overall? Good attempt, needs work.

[Sky66]

I thought the story was okay, but the execution could have been a bit more. The beginning felt stilted and the cover image you've used, I feel, seems to carry the story more so than the writing.

Also I was surprised about Luna not laughing/chuckling about her sister's predicament. I'm sure Luna wasn't around in the 60's to see the new groove (I know MLP don't use human years/timeline I was just mentioning the era since we were on it. Basically I don't think there were afros back when Luna was around a 1000 years ago).

Overall, I found Celestia firing the guards for lying to be too harsh a punishment. If nothing else, I think forcing them to have afros for a few days would have been more entertaining/humiliating.

Edit: Why do you have Philomena tagged when s(he) isn't even in this story?

Best of luck, stay healthy, and update soon.

-Sky66

[The Well Dressed Ninja]

[LoneUnicornWriter]

4000766 Lol

[ShadowWing09]

Interesting premise, but this Celestia is much harsher and more impatient than we know her to be from the show. That alone is too much of a downside to be ignored.

[mapu]

It's time to judge someone for treason!

[Luna Secret Stallion]

Oh damn watch out for them white mares bro they got a thing about their hair.

[Eskerata]

Sky66 has the right idea about Celestia zapping the guards so that they get Fro'd as well. Having them getting fired like that kind of let the steam out of the joke. You need to work on punctuation, as well. "Is there something wrong gentlemen?", for example, should have a comma between wrong and gentlemen.
You have a nice idea to work with here. Keep practicing, friend. You are getting better.

[Garbo]

Why didn't you just call it Frolestia?

[LoneUnicornWriter]

4215163 Ooooh, you know uhh I really don't know. All my stories need a edit anyhow. I'll be sure to do that when I get around to fixing it up. XD Or maybe I could do that now O.o

Edit: Your title is better :P. I should've named it that at the start.

[Nineveh]

4001268 imgur.com/JTLfj4f.gif

[Nightshimmer]

TO THE MOON

[DUBMAR3000]

33.media.tumblr.com/ea3723a6e42d7f5b394c828091b1a525/tumblr_mqcwoy4YRd1qe8a0fo1_500.gif

[The Crimson Reaper]

5362237 OH GOD PLEASE HELP ME I CANT STOP LAUGHI-AAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAPLEASEKILLME!!