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A Trixiejack ship!
It all began during a terrible storm. Two mares with an awkward and bitter past end up forced to share each others company. A kindness offered and a kindness reciprocated. And before either one knew what was happening they were both tumbling head over hooves. But into what? Friendship? Or something more.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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I am ensnared.
I don't stumble on many stories that have me read every. Single. Word. There was absolutely NOTHING skim-worthy about this. The story you told was gripping and powerful. And I actually felt more things for Applejack than usual. Even better, I felt more for Trixie. Trixie! She made me laugh, made me grin made me scream 'WTF?!' as much as I did while reading 'TWILIGHT FIXES EVERYTHING'.
This had the perfect mix of showing and telling, and the pacing kept me hooked and focused. You described the setting very well, and I actually felt the cold biting at Applejack. Though, I'm not clear if she and Big Mac actually went out there without winter gear. Might want to clear that up next chapter. Also, had Applejack COMPLETELY forgotten about her brother at this point? She didn't exactly seem worried about him near the end. But given the situation, I can see the believability.
These are all passable, but need some sort of clarification.
The one thing the story lacks is foreshadowing. Yes you've set the premise for chapters to come, and that's a necessity. But since this was in AJ's point of view, it would have been beyond addicting to be hinted toward all the horrible things AJ expects from her... situation. That, really, is my only gripe.
To my knowledge, there are only three TrixieJack fics, and this one is well on its way to greatness unparalleled. You've got my curiosity, my attention, my like, and my fave.
I eagerly await your update.
Craine...
Hehe, funny thing about this... I logged on and just about shit myself when I saw there was a story titled "The Trixie Treatment" on the front page. For a second, in my half asleep daze, I thought I'd accidentally submitted mine, which would have been awful, since it's currently just a bunch of notes and unfinished bullshit. Of course, the premise is 100% different, being a comedy rather than a romance, and I don't really intend to seriously write it anyway. That being said...
Good so far. I'll admit I only read it at first because of the above reason, being that I hate Trixie with a fiery passion. Seriously, she is without a doubt my least favorite character. But, you wrote her spectacularly well, which is something that you don't come by often on this site. Also, I've been trying to get over my intense hatred of her anyway, especially since she's the only villain that I just don't like. I feel like she should be up there with Gilda and Diamond Tiara. Anyway, I digress. I like it. Looking forward to more.
Okay, this is adorable beyond words. I'm really enjoying the characterization. Please continue!
I don't think I've seen combination before. And you do write Trixie well.
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Who downvoted this?!
Aww Poor Trixie
Alas, even when she's trying to be hospitable Trixie gets the raw treatment. That said, you seem to depict AJ with some of the sense that she's supposed to have. Too many bad fics like to have her and RD act as though it's perfectly fine to assault Trixie without provocation, and it just makes them come across as stupid and petty. Here, AJ is for once taking the moment to consider Trixie as a fellow pony rather than some kind of walking trouble to deal with. I like it.
I like how excited she is about peaches in syrup. I mean that is pretty good but the image i got in my head was adorable.
I think Trixie may be cracked in the head. AJ is wise to just humor her tell she can get out. I loved the image of Trixie clamping onto AJ''s back legs and being dragged around. You can't physically stop Applejack, skinny little unicorn. You have to use magic.
This goes in the right way, I liked!
I also really love the characterization of Trixie in this. No matter her situation, she's still proud of what she has.
Thanks for all your support and feedback, guys!
Gonna keep giving it my all and update as frequently as I can.
3510768 Don't push too hard.
YES, a Trixie/Applejack fic. I've been waiting for one of these.
Off to a good start. Though to be fair to AJ, Trixie threw her into some crates after the tickling. This is gonna to be good.
Okay I love this story even more now.
Whoa, great story in this chapter!!
This is great. This is one of the weirdest pairings I've ever heard off, but you're doing it.
The way you write them seems so spot on.
Thanks for the laugh and a good time, I can't wait to see how this goes, I'm hoping for a long story, because this is AWESOME.
This is truly a stellar start to a gorgeous fic. I love your descriptions of both Trixie and AJ. They feel perfectly spot on and beautiful. I cannot wait for more.
I said in previous chapter's comments that AJ was getting to see Trixie as her own individual, and this chapter continues the trend. It's a surprisingly sweet gesture of Trixie, to comfort her with a little story.
It's funny, really. Most stories where Trixie finds acceptance with the Mane 6, she either wins them over with a good gesture to prove that she's good (saving the CMC from something nasty often works well), or they learn to cope with her, over a period of time, usually because whomever she's shipped with thinks highly of her. Here, Trixie isn't doing anything special - just being as hospitable as any pony could be, certainly doing as much as AJ would do for a victim - and AJ is facing the ugly truth that Trixie might not be the cackling storybook villain she thought she is. She's just a regular pony.
This is so sweet, I confess I wanted to smack J for the loner crack but it was so perfectly in character for her. I can't wait to see what goes next.
That was awesome! A story within the story! Bravo go sir madam or thing! Bravo!
*Grins* this is fantastic. I love Aj, you do her utterly spot on, she's scared and feeling vulnerable so she tries to protect herself by jumping to conclusions and being so prickly. So quick to judge and then feeling sorry after the fact. I love Trixie too, she doesn't simply feel like a punching bag but has real strength and character. This is a terrific story and I'm loving every chapter.
I really liked the story of Red Frost. I love how you have Trixie and Applejack. Now, Big Mac has shown up. I look forward to the next chapter.
Adorable Trixie is adorable.
Thank you.
Surprised AJ didn't insist on taking Trixie with her, considering she was all skin and bones.
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Aww dang it. You're right. She totally would have. And that would have actually made for a cleaner transition to my 2nd arc as well.
Aahah that was darling. Can't wait to see what'll happen next.
When exactly is this supposed to take place? Last chapter or so you mentioned that the Apple Family Reunion was only about a week ago I believe, if her recent letter was any indication, but you also said that the time when Big Mac hurt his ribs was "last Applebuck Season." Do you interpret it that the course of the entire show has taken place in only about a year?
3524181
Oh no! I derped up! Imma go fix that.
I do love this story. It's simple and heartwarming and I really love how you "paint" Trixie's character and experience with Magic Duel. The only thing I would change is the titles, add act 1 or something to that effect for the parts of act 1 and act 2 for the second act and so on and so forth. It would make it more organized. But that is just my opinion, whether you act on it or not is your decision, wont stop me from continuing to read the story.
best part of this chapter. Cause that means there's more!
I'm enjoying this story quite a bit, you make a decent AJ and Trixie. I agree with Seether00 about her insisting Trixie come with her, but there are quite a few ways you can bring that up later, specially if the snowstorm isn't actually over. If you've any interest on a Trixie Skype group contact Philosopher01, we exchange a ideas and edit eachother's stuff on there. I don't write myself but I edit and help out as I can. Good luck and I am looking forward to seeing how this continues!
This is gonna be good
I agree Applejack might have insisted that Trixie come with her, but Trixie is a proud and stubborn unicorn. Applejack was in no position to fight over it, or spring this on her family out of nowhere. Princess Twilight, however, will have no problem getting Trixie to Ponyville. I will be up to Trixie how she gets there though. The easy way or the hard way.
Nice story. I like this Trixie.
Hm, you write a really nice Trixie. Most stories have her insisting on being rude and arrogant even if someone just saved her life, or is doing her a huge favor. Here, however, she is really trying to be nice, while still being as proud and boastful as we know and love her, and her character is much more believable as in the aforementioned cases.
Looking forward to more.
So AJ does actually say "heck" occasionally. I thought she only said "what the hay" but when I watched S04E01+2 she totally said heck so I'm going to go with that from here on.
Still a fun story
This goes well
My guess is you're catching Trixie's laziness, that or you indeed were going through Trixie withdrawal.
i can't wait for Trixie's bad habits to rub off on Applejack.
I was a bit surprised when Applejack didn't offer to help Trixie out in the last chapter, but now I'm glad she didn't. It makes much more sense for Trixie to invite herself.
This is now my favorite story, of the ones I'm following at the moment.
Please continue.
"May I have another sir?" That's what I imagine Apple Jack's "Trixie translator" to come up with when Trixie gets some real food in her and my translator to say now. Write faster please
I also hope to see more of the 'Trixie-translator.'
Awww
Amazing chapter!
Please I want some more?! How long are you going to make this? Just to know.
2deep4me
Seriously, this chapter gets all of my yes.
Fucking hell, mate, you rock.