//------------------------------// // Chapter 1: Judgement on Ice // Story: The Trixie Treatment. // by DerpyDitzyDerpyDo //------------------------------// Well, Ah might jus' be the dumbest pony in all Equestria. Ah'm about as dumb as a mute squir'l with a drinkin' problem. As the Element of Honesty, Applejack had as much trouble lying to herself as to anypony else. Unfortunately this means that she often finds herself having to come face to face with inconvenient truths. Tonight, for example, Applejack was coming to terms with the fact that she was probably going to die. Soon. It was the worst blizzard Ponyville had seen in two generations. Due to an unforeseeable scheduling error several storms had been assembled simultaneously rather than being spread throughout the winter season. These misplaced storms had merged and grown well beyond the point where the rather understaffed Ponyville weather team could dissipate them. Current word on the street was that the town would have no choice but to batten down the hatches and wait out the storm. And Ah had to pick tonight out of all possible nights to be as stubborn as a mule, knee deep in a barrel o' taffy. Applejack's cousin Apple Cobbler had come stumbling through the sleet and into the farmhouse at Sweet Apple Acres to implore her kin for help, several hours before the storm hit its peak. Golden Orchards Farm was woefully underprepared for the coming tempest and Apple Rose, the matriarch of that branch of the Apple family, had sent out for help from all the surrounding farms. And Ah jus' had to go chargin' into the storm like a buffalo with its head stuck in a hornet's nest. With the snow squall brewing fiercely Applejack had decided she did not have time to implore her friends for help. She had left the young Apple Cobbler to warm up by the fire and set off with her brother into the blinding snow. They had tried to stay together but the howling winds had swallowed her brother's voice as they ran and even his bright red coat had vanished into swirling whiteness. Soon his tracks too had been devoured by the moaning white monster that enveloped her. She had called till her voice ran hoarse and ragged with no reply but the roar of the storm. Now, alone and hopelessly lost, she dragged herself on through the icy flurry. Now Ah'm as cold as a... a frozen apple in a... as a... a... Ah'm as cold as... Applejack's ability to formulate folksy similes was somewhat compromised by early signs of hypothermia. Her surroundings had seemed to blur together. She felt almost like she was lurching through a frozen dream, floating on the snowdrifts and tumbling down the icy anticlines. Finally, after what seemed like forever, but may well have been little more than a few moments, Applejack glimpsed a distant flicker of light. That's gotta be Golden Orchards. Oh, Ah hope Big Mac's okay. As she grew closer it became increasingly apparent that she was not approaching her intended destination. The glimmer of light came from a small window visible in what appeared to be little more than a miniature mountain of snow. Applejack shielded her eyes against the driving snow and squinted at the odd abode. It was a caravan, albeit half buried in the snow. A small purple sign was hung over the caravan's entrance sporting an azure wand surrounded by sky blue stars. The sign looked oddly familiar but in her dazed state she wasn't quite able to put the pieces together. She raised a trembling hoof and knocked. There were several moments of surprised thumps and creaks and then silence. The half moon hatch opened a single cautious inch and a grey violet eye peeked out of the crack. "Ah'm awful s-s-sorry to b-b-be b-b-botherin' ya so late. B-b-but Ah think Ah'm at the end of mah rope. C-c-can ya give me some shelter from the s-s-storm," Applejack's teeth chattered violently. The door slammed shut, immediately. Ah'm really gonna die out here. Dang it all. And I'm not even gonna be able to help out with Winter Wrap Up. The door burst wide open and a brilliant blue unicorn exploded out of the caravan dressed in a sweeping star-covered purple cloak and matching wizard's hat. "Rejoice, mere mortal! It is I, the Great and Powerful Trixie, your saviour, your heroine, your..." Trixie trailed off mid-sentence, "Trixie has decided, in her supreme wisdom, that it is too cold to continue this conversation outside." With a flick of her tail and a swoop of her cloak she rushed hurriedly back inside, leaving the door open for her trembling visitor. Applejack's chattering teeth were stilled if only by the fact that she was now standing slack jawed. Why, in Celestia's name, of all the ponies in Equestria did it have to be this one? She heaved herself up the small step and slumped into Trixie's caravan. The magician extraordinaire was about to shut the door herself when a billowing gust beat her to it. As the wind rattled the walls of the small wooden caravan the two stood in silence, staring at one another. Trixie cleared her throat, stepped daintily onto a small wooden stool, rose up onto two hoofs and continued, "Welcome to the humble abode of Equestria's greatest unicorn! The one, the only, the Great and Powerful Trixie! Be amazed at..." Trixie cut her speech short again. Her guest had quite clearly lost consciousness. _______________________________ Applejack found herself enveloped in warmth as she swam in and out of waking. Her mind slowly nudging thoughts around, idly plucking at ideas out of the thick, moist haze. Storm. Snow. Cold. Help. 'Mac. Cold. So cold. Trixie. Trixie? Trixie! Applejack gasped. Her eyes fluttering open to see the arrogant blue mare herself staring down at her. She burst up. Splashing around frantically for a few panicked moments. "What in the hay is goin' on here?" she squawked, desperately trying to assess her surroundings. She was sitting in a small rusty metal bathtub, waist deep in steaming water. The bathtub sat in the centre of the small wooden room. Trixie was seated at the other end of the steel tub, her fore-hooves dipped in the water, staring at AJ with a perplexed look on her face. "Are you quite ready?" she asked, tilting her head inquisitively. "Am Ah a what now?" "Are you ready? Listening carefully? Fully awake? In possession of all your senses? May Trixie begin?" she tapped her hoof, impatiently, on the rim of the bathtub. Applejack was more than a little disoriented but she nodded, if only out of confusion. Trixie levitated the small wooden stool over to her and climbed onto it. She paused, appeared to remember something important and then climbed off. After retrieving her hat and cloak from a peg in the corner and putting them on she clambered back onto the stool and rose up on two hooves. "Aha! Thank your fates, peon! The Great and Powerful Trixie, in her might and mercy, has decided that you shall be spared a miserable death in this terrible storm. You may stay the night in Trixie's palace of wonder!" Trixie glanced at Applejack expectantly from under the brim of her hat, "You have permission to shower Trixie with gratitude and adoration now." Applejack took a moment to shake off the dizziness. "Well, that ain't any kinda answer at all. What am Ah doin' in your bath?" she asked, irritably. "Stand in awe at the sheer magnitude of Trixie's intellect!" crowed Trixie, evidently more than a little proud of herself, "Trixie read in a book that blankets are useless for saving freezing ponies because they work by keeping heat in: which only works if ponies have body heat to begin with. In a brilliant flash of insight, Trixie decided that a hot bath would be the best way to warm you back up. So with undeniable skill she heated some water," Trixie nodded at a small, simmering and blackened stove in the corner, its glowing coals wafting warmth through the cramped room, a crooked pipe, equally as rusty as the bath tub, served as a makeshift chimney. Some section of the pipe seemed to have been patched together with used tin cans, "She drew a bath and put you in it and, lo and behold, your life has been saved!" Applejack tried to process this information, all the while attempting to filter out the smattering of self adulation. "That bein' that, you didn't have to stand loomin over me, like. Almost scared me half to death." Trixie pouted, "The Great and Powerful Trixie was holding your head up so you didn't slump down and drown in the water." "Oh..." Applejack cast her eyes down, ashamed. However, her confidence slowly began to flow back into her as she regained her bearings, "Thank ya, kindly Miss Trixie. I reckon that about makes us two about even." "Even!" piped Trixie indignantly, "Even nothing! The Great and Powerful saved your life! You owe her your eternal gratitude!" "Eternal gratitude, my hoof! You tried to enslave me and all mah friends!" Trixie deflated rapidly. She removed her hat, showing a pair of blue ears flattened against her pale mane. Hopping down off the stool she approached Applejack. "You were... you were one of the ponies Trixie hurt? While using the amulet?" she was almost cowering behind the hat as she spoke. Peeking over the wide brim at Applejack who sat defiantly in the tub, glaring back at her. "Now you ain't gonna tell me you've gone and clean forgotten about what you did, now are you?" asked Appljack splashing her hoof in the bath water as an act of self punctuation. "Trixie can't remember much of what happened after she put on the Alicorn Amulet. Did she do something very bad to you?" "You're darn right, you did! You tickled me something fierce! Made me into your slave, near as," cried Applejack, puffed up with self righteous indignation. There was a long silence following this remark, broken only by the wind whistling under the door. "Trixie... tickled you?" Trixies azure cheeks were now coloured a deeper shade of red than the ruby amulet in question. Applejack was suddenly unsure whether the steam was coming off the bath or off Trixie, "She made you do... demeaning... sexual things?" "Wuh-What? No!" Applejack was now equally flustered. "Did the Great and Powerful Trixie tickle you with her... tongue? Or her hooves? What did she do?" Trixie seemed to be riding the borderline between moist eyes and full on tears. Applejack's ears burned. "Now, hold on there! It weren't nothing like that! You tickled me with feathers!" "Were you tied down at the time? Were ropes and leather involved? Did Trixie's darker side get the better of her?" Trixie was in a full blown panic, her eyes already moistening with tears and her cheeks bright red. "No! Just... don't worry about it. It wasn't as bad as all that." Trixie sniffed miserably and wiped her now runny nose on her cape. "Trixie was going to apologise afterwards but then somepony drew hurtful graffiti on her Caravan again and she thought it best if she just left. She did apologise to Twilight though!" Applejack's irritation evaporated. Trixie was a dishevelled mess, only distinguisheable from some kind of travelling hobo by the stars on her cape and her air of confidence. She lived in this ramshackle wooden wreck, meagre evidence of her travels lying on display around the room. For once she seemed so much more genuine than their previous encounters. The facade of haughtiness seemed to be worn almost as an act of self parody than true conceit. "Ah... don't worry about it," Applejack said as she made an effort to clamber out of the tub. Trixie hastily nudged her back in. She levitated her cape and hat onto a nearby peg and Applejack could almost see her mentally rolling up her sleeves. "Whatever happened... it's clear that the Great and Powerful Trixie has done some harm to you while she was behaving... in a manner that cannot be described as great. But put your fears and apprehensions aside! We may be even, now, but by the end of the night you will be in Trixie's debt. Trixie is going to take the best possible care of you she can for the night and then you can report back to Twilight that Trixie is a changed mare!" Trixie wiped her eyes and grinned, "Prepare yourself, commoner! You are about to receive the Trixie Treatment." Applejack gulped. This is going to be as awkward as a spring day in the fall.