I sometimes feel like I hate myself.
I am… well, I certainly am not cocky. Heavens, no. Adequate manners for the lady with proper grace rebuff any such uncouth behaviour. A lady is never cocky. Self-important, proud, overconfident --- perhaps --- but cocky? Never.
Nevertheless, while ample words dignify a lady’s poise, the matter of how I treat those around me remains. All my life, long as I can remember, I have only ever wanted to be noticed. Growing up into a charming, young lady with exquisite taste in style and fashion, I longed to be mobbed around by fans, cheering out my name, as if I were a glamourous star.
My only true home was the spotlight.
And that thirst for the spotlight has, more than once, led to ruin for my friends. For Rainbow Dash, precisely. That day in Cloudsdale... ugh, the memories. Of course, everything turned alright in the end -- but I despise myself for it began in the first place.