The Memoirs Of A Reality Jumper

by Techogre

70 - Party Surprises!

I stood in front of the chalkboard at Ponyville Elementary School, surrounded by the excited murmur of young voices. The classroom was full of young earth ponies, unicorns, and pegasi who gazed up at me with curious eyes. Their imaginations were undoubtedly weaving tales of the local hero who had saved them and their schoolmates, all while thwarting the recent Diamond Dog raid.

The room was bathed in the warm glow of the late morning sun that streamed through the windows, throwing playful shadows across the desks and floor. The sound of laughter mingled with the anticipatory chatter of the children. Somewhere in the distance, the town clock greeted eleven with cheerful bell strikes that seemed to capture everyone's attention.

Miss Cheerilee, ever the embodiment of warmth and authoritative grace, stood by her desk. "Settle down, my little ponies,” she said while clapping her hooves. At her command, the room quietened. Her kind voice introduced me, “I am happy to present Mr Alex Roberts. He is here today to tell us about his species, humans. Let's give him a big Ponyville Elementary welcome."

Applause filled the room, and I couldn't help but flash a genuine smile. With these kids, I felt good about being here, ready to broaden their understanding of the world. I wore my comfiest sweater, acknowledging that while these little ponies might not feel the cold, I certainly did.

I thanked Miss Cheerilee and turned to the attentive students. "Thank you for having me," I started, trying to keep my voice genial and inviting. I suppose the sweater made me channel my inner Mr Rogers, but the reference would be lost on anyone except Matt.

"Humans are quite similar to ponies in many respects. Family, friendship, community; they matter to us just as much as they do to you." I glanced at Miss Cheerilee and gestured to the chalkboard, “May I?” She nodded. So, with her permission, I turned to the chalkboard, wiped away the remnants of a previous maths lesson, and started drawing parallels—literally—between our worlds.

The responses from the children were a mix of rapt attention and typical youthful restlessness. A particular group, however, formed around a filly I recognized as Diamond Tiara. They watched her almost as closely as they did me, ready to mimic her every sneering expression.

Not far from this clique, Silver Spoon sat alone—once Diamond Tiara's shadow but now estranged because of her former friend's mean streak. She faced away from Diamond Tiara, quiet rebellion written in her posture.

As I explained about human diets—our omnivorous nature—I noticed the fluctuations of intrigue and surprise on those young pony faces. I briefly bared my teeth in a smile, "These chompers help us eat just about anything."

Diamond Tiara pounced on that, her voice laced with malice. "So, is it true you eat... meat?"

I could tell she was gunning for a dramatic reaction, but instead, I answered calmly with a kindly smile. "Got it in one. We do, in fact, eat meat, though not as extensively as some other species. For example, griffins are on the carnivore side of the omnivore spectrum, just like ponies are on the herbivore end of that spectrum. Humans are right in the middle. We need a little bit of everything."

Scootaloo sat up taller, beaming proudly. She whispered to the little gray colt, steel skin, sitting beside her, "That's my dad." Her pride for me warmed my heart.

"But ponies don't eat meat! That could never be right!" Diamond Tiara continued, her frustration mounting in the absence of the scandalized reaction she’d hoped for.

Miss Cheerilee intervened then, her tone soft yet decisive. "Fish is a traditional pegasus feast food, Mr Roberts," she affirmed, smoothly redirecting the conversation and silencing the brewing dissent. “So, class, as you can see, even ponies eat meat to some degree.”

I smiled and nodded at the purple teacher, "As do humans. One theory I had heard before arriving in Equestria was that eating fish and other seafood helped our brains develop." The youngsters seemed intrigued by this possibility.

My presentation continued with minimal disruption. Diamond Tiara tried her best to interrupt the flow with underhanded comments and whispers. At one point, she even uttered a slur—"narwhal"—directed at Sweetie Belle. But I noticed—and chose to focus on—Silver Spoon. Her look of disillusionment with Diamond Tiara was palpable, and as much as I was there to educate, I hoped for understanding and friendship to win within themselves.

Wrapping up my talk, the air shifted when Scootaloo led a round of applause that was heartier than I could have anticipated. Diamond Tiara sat, forelegs crossed, a scowl etched on her face as the applause continued, her plans to undermine me unsuccessful. Even Silver Spoon joined in, softly at first but with growing hope that redemption wasn’t out of reach for everypony.

Cheerilee soon took the reins again as the room descended into animated claps and chatter, and for just a brief second, I caught a glimpse of something in Diamond Tiara's eyes, something that looked like hate, and it was directed squarely at me.

---

As the evening twilight in Ponyville blanketed my backyard, the dying embers of daylight flirted with the vibrant balloons tethered to the trees and fences. The scent of fresh pastry mixed with the blooming fall flowers filled the early evening air, heralding Scootaloo’s birthday celebration. Colours and sounds flooded the scene, with a score of colts and fillies scuttling about, their laughter and playful excitement blending into the atmosphere of festivity.

Rainbow Dash, faithful as ever, hovered nearby, guarding the party with the same protective instinct she reserves for the skies. Standing beside her, I took in the transformed landscape of my backyard—now a fantasy of games, treats, and fun.

The Great and Powerful Trixie, cloaked in her starry garb, mingled with our guests. Her horn, glowing with a gentle blue hue, teased out the magic that burst into sparkles above the heads of the elated colts and fillies. A short distance away, Pinkie Pie revved up the crowd, her infectious energy captivating as she bounced from one group to another, game to game, laughter trailing in her wake.

I caught Scootaloo dashing past, her giggles capturing my heart. "Enjoying your birthday, Scoots?" I called out, sweeping her into a momentary hug.

Her mane danced in the lantern light as she nodded vigorously. "It's awesome, Dad! Especially with you and Mom here!" Her words were the best gift I could have received.

Returning to Rainbow Dash's side, we exchanged a knowing look, her eyes reflecting the emergence of the night's first stars. We took a moment, leaning against the wooden fence, silently appreciating the perfect chaos of the party.

She nuzzled me gently. "You know, I've been thinking about the wedding. I'd be happy with just a small ceremony. Only us, the kids, and a handful of friends."

I chuckled, eye twinkling with mischief. “But how else could I broadcast to the world that I’m the lucky guy marrying Rainbow ‘Danger’ Dash? And what better place to have it than the new theatre we're building?” I teased.

Her laugh, clear and heartfelt, filled the air around us. "You goof," she playfully retorted, her shoulder bumping mine.

As if on cue, the party's heartbeat, Pinkie Pie, whisked past us. "Remember, Alex, we’ll need more cupcakes soon!" she hollered over the fresh round of games commencing.

I gave her a thumbs up just as I noticed Wood Frame and Sweetie Petunia chatting by the refreshments. Drifting over with Dash, I greeted them warmly. "Evening, you two! Enjoying the party?"

“This is quite the get-together," Wood Frame admitted, his eyes wide in awe as they scanned the backyard. "It’s one heck of a bash!"

Sweetie Petunia beamed, her eyes reflecting the myriad colours of the party lights. "Indeed. We're quite smitten with this little town," she chimed in, her voice a soft melody amidst the cacophony of laughter and music. Her stature was regal, reminiscent of the princesses in elegance yet marked by her own unique grace. I surmised she stood just a shade shorter than Princess Cadence or Princess Luna, her slim figure casting a dainty shadow on the ground.

Dash remarked with her usual gusto, "Ponyville is awesome! I've made it my home for a while. You'll both make friendships in no time, I guarantee it."

Mid-conversation, the illustrious Rarity made her way into our gathering. "Petunia, darling! Too many moons have passed since our last meeting." The fashion icon and Petunia exchanged a heartfelt hug, their affection palpable. Rarity then addressed me with a flourish, "You must know, Alex, that this lovely mare was the first to grace the catwalk in my creations." Her gaze then swept to Wood Frame, adding with a playful smirk, "And who could forget this rugged stallion, the very one who swept her off her hooves," she teased, wrapping him in a gentle embrace. Their shared laughter mingled with the party's mirth as I observed their joyful reunion.

We chatted about the theatre plans. Petunia and Rarity listened with polite curiosity. At one point, Wood said, "I hate to bring this up, but I've got to be honest. I'm a little worried about the funding for this project. I mean, you're being pretty generous. My pay, for example. I'm not—"

Rarity, who had been listening with attentive grace, interrupted, "Alex is well up to the task. After all, we're all invested in his vision," she reassured him, poised as ever.

Our camaraderie was short-lived as my attention snapped to a fleeting shadow darting behind the bushes. At first, I thought I had spotted some kid playing in the greenery, but I caught a second glimpse. It was definitely not a pony. My heart fluttered with alarm; I excused myself, suspecting trouble. "I'll be back in a flash. Need to check on... something for the kids," I fumbled.

I made a beeline to Big Macintosh. He was standing quietly, keeping an eye on the youngsters and Trixie. I discreetly whispered to him, "Mac, something is sneaking around the house. Could you take a little walk to the right? I'll go left. Keep going until we meet. If you find anything, give a holler."

The big red stallion gave a sharp nod and started sauntering toward the house.

I caught Trixi’s attention. I whispered in her ear, ”Loud fireworks, please.”

When I started walking toward the house, the joyful explosions started. Dash, at first confused, made eye contact and threw me a knowing look.

Around the house, I tread carefully, the waning light creating dancing shadows with the flashes of the fireworks. There, obscured by garden shrubbery, I got a good glimpse of the unwelcome intruder. It was a golem with patchwork colours, like my ninja costume—a disconcerting sight. I’d seen similar golems in more conventional colours in high-end offices, shuffling papers around. I hesitated, uncertain. As I decided to confront it, the golem slipped into the night.

I gave quiet chase, the festivities receding in the background. I wove between the foliage, unfazed by the snap of twigs—a sound lost to the distant echo of Trixie’s magical fireworks.

When Big Mac and I regrouped, having found no trace of the intruder, Rainbow Dash descended, her form sharp against the backdrop of the Equestrian sky. "Okay, Alex. What the hay is going on?"

“Thought I saw something. Must have been… I don’t know what.” I scratched the back of my neck and fumbled to explain myself further, but as Trixie's magic and Pinkie's voice summoned us back to the party, I managed a reassuring smile. "Let's head back. It's probably no big deal. Anyway, the kids are having a blast, and truth be told, so am I." My words were a veiled promise—I'd tell her everything later when the time was right.

Before heading back to the party, I went inside. Seeing the golem, or thinking I saw it, made me realize Wood Frame and his family were still new in town. I’m not sure why that thought led to the other. Pinkie must be rubbing off on me. Anyway, I thought it would be nice to invite them over and really get to know them.

I strode out of the back door once more. Amidst the festivities, I approached Sweetie Petunia and Wood Frame, offering them a handwritten invitation to join us on Nightmare Night. "It’s nothing fancy, just a Nightmare Night dinner at our place. We'd be honoured if you joined us."

Wood Frame appeared touched, and with a look of newfound trust, he accepted. "We'd love to."

As the party continued to unfold, Trixie's illusions providing a mesmerizing backdrop and Pinkie Pie directing activities with delightful precision, I stood back, filled with a silent resolve to guard this life, my family, my friends, and all its wonder—even against shadowy threats.

---

I was halfway through topping up the tray of cupcakes in the kitchen when the doorbell rang. Laughter and party noise drifted through the house from the backyard, where the birthday party was in full swing. I held a cupcake in my hand, pausing as the bell rang again, its insistence odd amidst the party's chaos. Curious and a little concerned about who might show up uninvited, I set the tray on the countertop and made my way to the door.

I glanced through the peephole but didn't recognize the two ponies standing on the porch. The setting sun cast long shadows behind them, almost like omens. Opening the door, I was about to ask if I could help them, but the words never came out.

"I'm Rainbow Blaze," the stallion announced, a little too loudly and with more than a hint of inebriation. His grey coat was unkempt, and his muzzle sported a dusting of white crystals.

Salt.

Beside him stood a mare, her golden mane catching the fading light, enhancing the brilliance of her sky-blue coat. She carried herself with a subdued grace, her expression tinged with remorse. "And I'm Golden Dash, Rainbow's mother. We're here to see our granddaughter," she explained, her tone carrying more of a beseeching note than that of a simple introduction.

Feeling a twist in my stomach, my previously buoyant spirits began to ebb away. "I'm Alex Roberts, Scootaloo's father," I asserted, striving to maintain a convivial atmosphere despite the jolt of surprise.

Rainbow Blaze's overbearing pride was almost tangible. He spared me only the briefest of contemptuous glances before retorting, "What in Nightmare Moon's pimpled backside are you?" His blatant disregard rankled me, igniting a fierce protective instinct. "I reckon I could do with a drink," he muttered almost to himself.

My gaze hardened. "Mr. Rainbow Blaze, I believe you've already indulged in more than your fair share of salt this evening. Don't you think it would be better to experience your granddaughter's birthday party with a clear head?" I forced my voice to remain calm, even though it was laced with barely contained irritation.

That set him off. "Who do you think you are? Telling me, ME, what I can and can't do." Blaze's eyes were narrow slits of indignation, his stance teetering ever so slightly.

I readjusted my approach, a pleading note entering my voice. "Please. I've got a backyard full of kids and their folks. You wouldn’t want to make a scene, right?"

"What do I care about strangers I'm never going to see again?" he retorted, a few flecks of saliva flying from his mouth.

My patience was wearing thin. He wants to play this game? Fine. I pointed to the floor, "This is my house," I pointed to the backyard, "and these are my friends and family. You will behave—no salt, play nice, or else you're out.” I smiled to the quiet mare, “Mrs. Golden Dash, you're welcome to stay; I insist."

Golden's apologetic look spoke volumes, and Blaze's belligerence dwindled as I set my jaw firm. "Fine. I'll play nice," he acquiesced grudgingly. "Now, where's my granddaughter?"

Golden spoke, almost pleadingly, ”I haven’t seen my little Dashie in over a year. I know she’s a famous hero and probably has no time for an old mare. In her last letter, she said she was adopting Scootaloo, and,” the older mare became a little bashful, “she told me about you, too. She loves you so much.”

Blaze snorted derisively.

Ignoring him, I smiled warmly at her, “And I love her very much.” Golden and I shared a moment together. I plastered on a smile, picked up the tray of cupcakes, and gestured toward the backyard with my chin. "Alright, now that we've cleared the air, let's all be smiles and sunshine. Ready to meet your granddaughters?"

As we made our way to the back door, Blaze peered at the tray curiously. "You have daughters? Plural? We knew about Scootaloo, but…" he trailed off.

"Summer Blossom. Dash and I adopted her recently."

"Who's this Summer Blossom? Is she a hyooman or something?"

The disgust in his voice irked me further as I corrected him with a stern undertone, "Or someone. She's a diamond dog. I stopped her mother from making a terrible mistake. Now, she's my daughter too, just as much as Scootaloo is." I let the threat hang subtly between us.

Blaze started to speak, a sneer forming, but Golden cut him off with a glare that could freeze molten lava. "Looking forward to meeting her," he grumbled instead.

I couldn't help thinking about the future and how I might help Blaze whether he wanted it or not. Zecora was pretty adept with potions; maybe she could whip up something to curb his salt habit. On the other hand, free will and all that. It was going to be complicated.

The party's hum enveloped us as we stepped onto the back porch. I caught Dash's eye and mouthed a silent "sorry" before announcing with as much cheer as I could muster, "Everyone! Everyone. We have a special surprise—Dash's parents, Blaze and Golden, have joined us!" We were greeted with friendly greetings and welcomes.

Dash stiffened at my announcement but quickly put on a brave face. She hugged Golden, "Mom! It's so great to see you!" Then, she barely acknowledged Blaze with a curt "Dad."

Barreling out of the crowd came Scootaloo, followed closely by Sweetie Belle and Applebloom. And striding among the ponies toward us was a smiling Summer Blossom.

Scootaloo shouted, “Grandma! Grandpa!” and ran between Golden and Blaze, hugging them both.

Summer bowed deeply, “Granddame. Grandsire. Me greet you both.”

Golden hugged Sootaloo tightly, then gestured for Summer to come closer. As soon as she was within hoof reach, Golden embraced her, too.

Blaze looked at the scene with a slight scowl, but a glance from me and his expression changed to that of a thin smile.

Rarity, Applejack, Pinkie Pie, and Twilight all came forward, offering polite greetings. Golden glanced around, likely looking for Fluttershy, as curiosity mixed with nostalgia in her expression.

The scene was a chaotic tapestry of my life here: laughter, surprise, and accepting two more into the fold, no matter how unexpected. My adopted daughters were nearby, my beloved Dash chatted with her parents, and now, those two figures from Dash's past added to the rich tapestry of what had become my world.

---

Chamor waited impatiently in his office, a forgotten cup of tea long gone cold before him. The outside darkness was punctuated with the faint sound and dim flash of fireworks from that birthday party. He sneered involuntarily. More chaos the world didn’t need.

Soon, he heard the soft clanking of metallic feet on the wooden floor. The familiar sound of the golem entering through the secret passage made him smile grimly. He muttered, “Let’s see what you dug up, my little friend.” With familiar ease, he connected a cable from the little spy golem to the projector and pressed the inset stud on the back of its neck.

The little golem drooped, standing limply on its oversized feet. The projector came to life, shining an image on its small screen. Chamor adjusted the controls, fast-forwarding to the party itself. There, the tinny din of the party played. He held a pencil in his mouth, ready to take note of any and all indiscretions.

After about an hour, he had still not seen anything beyond the normal chaos of a Pinkie Pie party. He was sure he was missing something.

Could he be wrong?

No.

He was sure.

He knew for a fact that this Alex character was up to no good. He was just better at hiding it than other chaos creatures. While Rainbow Dash was the Element Bearer of Loyalty, she was, in his estimation, a little dim and easily fooled. Scootaloo was just a child, and her objectiveness was marred by her desire to have parents, no matter how foul. The diamond dog? She was a creature of chaos as well, but she may indeed be without fault in this situation. However, there was always the possibility she may be part of whatever plan he has concocted.

Chaos must be expunged wherever it is found, no matter how innocuous.

Comments

[Theresa hall]

This guy is going to be in major trouble when the truth comes out.

[harts fire]

11810470
or make a really ugly statue in a garden.

[Techogre]

11810494
heh

[Comet_Chaser]

11810494
I'm particularly fond of this outcome lol

[Theresa hall]

11810537
Either way as long as he gets punished it's fine with me.

[Fetch]

Discord: This Chamor is starting to annoy me. Chaos is MINE to say if there is too much, not his. Neither I nor Harmony are looking for more help in keeping balance right now, so just who is this busybody trying to mess with my friends?