The Memoirs Of A Reality Jumper

by Techogre

57 - The Village Pt. 2

The scene reminded me of war documentaries, the ones where you can’t turn your eyes away from the screen. Bitches and their pups, haunted and hopeless eyes, males looking defeated and desperate, everyone was lean, dirty, and tired. I suspect some were looking for an excuse to rip us limb from limb and only the fact we were well armed and well fed kept us safe for now.

Our little menagerie moved through the village in stunned silence. Noctus had an expression of pity and anger. Beatrix stifled a cry. The other ponies were equally distressed. Not a single soul said a word; the only sound was the buzzing of flies and, in the distance, a crying infant.

No wonder they raided fat, prosperous Ponyville. I might have done the same thing in their place.

Bea stood close to me, “I don’t like this, boss. Could it be a trap?”

I surveyed the scene, “I don’t think they have the energy to do anything. I say we wait for—here we go.”

An old diamond dog with a cane hobbled towards us from one of the many caves. “ I will speak to you in pony-speak for my chief. My name is Moon Howler. I am the Speaker for the Eastern Forest Pack. Are you the Alex Roberts who defeated Grass Runner?”

May as well be honest, “Yes, I am. May I ask where Roughbone is? I thought he was the boss around here. Shouldn’t he be the one talking to me?”

Moon Howler shrugged, “You are beneath Chief Roughbone. Your last encounter was a special one. I would savour it if I were you.”

Noctus snorted in anger, but I glanced at him, and he didn’t make any further comments.

I kept my tone friendly, even jovial. “I’ll keep that in mind. Nevertheless, we,” I indicated to the group of ponies with me, “are here to help. We want to try to give you your dignity back.”

The old diamond dog’s face grew dark with anger. He spoke with a threatening voice, “Our dignity was never yours to give, monkey.”

Noctus snapped, “Keep your tongue civil or I will teach it to be civil.”

The oldster lowered his head and gave a slight smile. He dropped his cane and I saw his right paw ball into a fist. Glowing streamers of golden magical energy slipped between his fingers.

I admonished myself for being so foolish and thought, ‘They have spellcasters. Great. Why did I think only unicorns would be spellcasters.’

I stepped between them, “Please, gentlemen. Let’s not destroy the process before it’s even started.” I made a point to look at the pony commander, “Noctus, let’s view this as a chance for redemption.”

Noctus made to say something, then closed his muzzle and muttered, “As ordered, Paladin.”

I turned to the elder diamond dog. I noticed the glow slipping from his fingers was no less bright than before. “Speaker Moon Howler, I humbly request that you forgive this misunderstanding. Master Sergeant Noctus can be overprotective at times. I’m sure we want to keep this friendly and beneficial to us all.”

If possible, things grew quieter. Even the wailing baby had stopped. The two belligerents locked eyes, each daring the other to strike first.

I glanced around the village and noted twenty-seven, no, twenty-eight adults with various weapons. There were likely more in the caves. We had seven guard ponies plus myself and Bea. Those are not good odds. I spoke in a warning voice, “Noctus, don’t forget we’re in their house.”

Noctus’ head snapped in my direction. I gestured with my chin, indicating the now-armed village. He sighed. “Very well, Paladin.” He turned to the diamond dog, “In respect of your… domain, I withdraw my threat.”

Moon Howler bowed graciously while opening his paw. Golden wisps of energy dissipated. Almost as one most of the diamond dogs around the village put down their weapons. “Very well. Like water in the stream, all is fresh and new.” The oldster inclined his head in my direction, “I must commend you, Alex Roberts. I would have turned your friend to ash had you not intervened. Perhaps one day my chief will allow me a personal duel when such stakes,” he gestured to the village, “are not involved.”

Noctus bowed, “I would feel privileged to duel you. Perhaps we shall be able to determine who is the better combatant in a less lethal setting.”

I shook my head and thought, ‘Jesus Christ, guys. Stop with the dick-waving. You’re both pretty, now move on.’ I spoke up, “There will be no duelling. You’re both too valuable to me and Roughbone.”

Coming from one of the caves, I presume watching this whole stupid affair, was Roughbone. “Dat true. Moon Howler, smarty, keep what little we have organized. No duel for you, grey muzzle.”

The old dog looked crestfallen, as did Noctus.

Now that that nonsense is over, time to earn my keep. “Moon Howler, can you give me a situation report? In a nutshell, what’s going on?”

The Speaker sighed. “The primary issue is-”

Noctus interrupted, “Sir, with all due respect, we already know what’s going on. This group of bar… diamond dogs got greedy. It’s as simple as that. This was caused by their own mismanagement.“

I locked eyes with Noctus. “Are you done?" I turned to Moon Howler, "I apologize, Moon Howler, please continue.”

Moon Howler gave Noctus the stink eye, then nodded to me. “Thank you, Paladin. The primary issue is the food supplies sent by the Royal Sustenance Master are not suitable for a healthy diamond dog diet. It contains no gems of any kind and only fish as a meat source. The youngest have suffered the most from this poor diet. Bone loss, poor teeth, reduced vision. Our benefactors also deemed to include almost half by weight of those accursed ‘hay pucks’, only good for the hearth, and barely even that.”

I was confused, “Didn’t you inform the authorities? Surely they would want to make sure you’re getting proper nutrition.”

The old dog spat, “Why should ponies care about non-ponies?” He glared at Noctus, “Especially we bloodthirsty diamond dogs.”

Noctus became concerned, “Form CP872636 is a class A form, priority response for complaints regarding food supplies. If a simple six-page form is too much effort to ensure your supplies are adequate to your needs, then I see no need to correct the central bureaucracy.”

Moon Howler shook his head sadly, “Perhaps if your vaunted paperwork was related to ponies, it would have been acted upon. I filled out that form seven times. Seven! Not once did they reply or even acknowledge it. Not once. We were desperate, Paladin Alex Roberts. Our pups were starving. What would you have us do? Now, if you'll forgive me, my people need me." He hobbled off with all the dignity he could manage.

Noctus surveyed the scene; the lean hungry looks, the desperate parents and their frightened pups, and the downcast elderly. After a moment he came to a decision. Jaw set tight, he leapt into action, bellowing, “Silver Lining, get me requisition form FD110023/7 - Emergency Specialty Food Request.”

The bookish mare replied shyly, “But Master Sergeant, that’s a class AAA form. I am required by regulations to inform you this is only for the most dire of emergencies. Misuse of this form-”

Noctus snapped at his subordinate, “Are you questioning my knowledge of forms, corporal?”

Silver Lining sputtered, “No, of course not-”

Noctus took a step forward, getting muzzle-to-muzzle with his clerk. “This is a dire situation and requires the strongest measures be taken. I am shocked and appalled the forms sent by Moon Howler have not been acted upon. I will do everything in my power to ensure we uphold this agreement. The very honour of Equestria is at stake. We are ponies, not savages. Now, follow my orders or I will find the form myself along with the forms for your dismissal!”

Silver Lining quickly started rummaging around her saddle bags, “Right you are, Sergeant.”

After a moment, curiosity got the best of me. “Is this some kind of magical form that will get them food right away?”

Noctus rolled his eyes, “If by right away you mean four to eight days, then yes. It’s the most efficient way to get things done. The paperwork must flow.”

Beatrix snorted at Noctus' posturing and wandered off towards a group of pups.

I looked at him in silence for a moment, blinked slowly, and decided paperwork could get stuffed. “Right. Paperwork. Incidentally, Sergeant, who’s your fastest flyer?”

He answered without hesitation, “That would be Shooting Star, Paladin Roberts. She’s on cloud watch, over there.” He pointed to a small group of clouds in the distance, a bright red mane visible even from this distance.

I fought, successfully, to keep a calm and friendly expression. “Could you get them, please?”

The silver-haired show mare created fanciful illusions, much to the pups’, and a few adults’, delight.

Meanwhile, Noctus made a series of hoof gestures. I saw the glint of field glasses below the mane. The pegasus dropped through the clouds and headed in our direction at breakneck speeds. She was a sleek mare who would not have been out of place in the Wonderbolts. Her landing was graceful and showed controlled power. I noted her build was similar to Dash’s, only a little more muscular.

I spoke with gravitas, “Shooting Star, I have a special mission for you.”

She snapped to attention, “Sir, yes, sir!”

I continued, “How fast can you get to the nearest pegasus settlement?”

Shooting Star scratched her chin in thought, “About three hours if I book it.”

“In twelve hours I expect you back here with all the fish, meat, and gems you can get your hooves on. Hire fishers to work while you organize the shipment. Hit up pet stores if you have to. They’ll have the meat products if you are unable to find any other suppliers. Raid jewellery stores for gems, and talk to Moon Howler for the best kinds, especially for the young ones. Oh, and be sure to pay for them. I want minimal hard feelings. Once there, you will appropriate assistance from any number of guards, night or day, that you need. This is a Cadenza tier relief mission, corporal. Treat it as such.”

Shooting Star looked confused for a moment before a light went on and she smirked. “Yes, sir; Cadenza tier. Got it.”

“Oh, and take my coin purse.” I tossed her my money pouch. “Use mine and your own to pay for the supplies, make sure you get receipts and I'll ensure you will get double time to sort the paperwork afterwards. Pay with I.O.U.s if the funds you have are insufficient.”

A crisp “Sir, yes, sir” was accompanied by a snappy salute.

She turned to take off, but I called back to her, “Oh, and if anypony gives you even a hint of grief, remember you're under the orders of a Paladin entrusted with the authority of a Princess. I'll take full responsibility for any consequences.” I grabbed a piece of paper and a quill from Silver Lining, wrote a short note and handed it to the fast pegasus. “This should help. Good luck, soldier.”

Shooting Star stared at me for a moment before a huge grin formed. She saluted enthusiastically, “Sir, yes, sir!” As she sped off to find Moon Howler I heard her talking excitedly to herself, “I can see the headlines now, Night Guard saves the day. This’ll be sweet.”

Comments

[RaptorCalloftheShadows]

Yay.

[Zugthule]

nice very nice

[Chaos Theory]

I think the headlines will show something very differently.

[harts fire]

this is going to make a few waves I am hoping the right ones.

[Eli the Brohoof Master]

23 / 10

[TheArcticWolf]

7766667
Oh my gosh it's an honest lawyer.