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Never Feed Celestia Beans1,259 words

Never Feed Celestia Beans

Never Feed Celestia Beans

“No, really, we could compete!” Sweetie Belle exclaimed.

It was the afternoon in Ponyville, and during the summer time. Princess Celestia believed in hosting an annual exotic foods competition around the warmest of seasons. Of course, with it having many different guests from all around the world attending, it became a rather big deal for whichever city was hosting it. This year, it was Twilight’s home. Unfortunately, it would also be the city’s last time catering such an event. Sweetie Belle had heard of it early, and because of her persuasiveness, she and her two ~~partners in crime~~ friends were entering the competition. In the clubhouse, Scootaloo asked the gang, “So what are we going to cook if we enter?”

Applebloom, who didn’t realize how bad this would muck things up voiced, “Ah know just the thing! It’s an old recipe Applejack once fed to Granny Smith a while back. Ah was still really young, but ah do remember where she stashed it.”
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Time Shift
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Princess Celestia collapsed to the ground, tears leaking through her eyes and grunts releasing from her coughing mouth. “W-what in the world did you feed me?”

“It’s just beans...” Scootaloo looked at her friends in a worried manner. Before they knew it, a horrendous sound emitted from Celestia’s rump which made Lyra give a disgusted face. With that first sound, the sun wobbled in the sky, and a stench like an egg rotting at the high point of a Summer’s day seeped into everypony’s nostrils. “Oh... buh- by Luna’s beard...”

Then, a blinding flash of light stung through the air, and in less than a second, the air was filled with putrid, brown and red clouds acting as instant purifiers for the ozone. Everypony began scattering in shock and fear while Princess Celestia attempted to stand, but following her predictable collapse came a thunderous reign of fire through the smoke that laid waste to grand city hall. Right then and there, she found the strength to scream out, “... Pepto Bismol!”

Then, all Tartarus broke loose with an inferno ripping through the ground just beyond the city limits. Molten lava began seeping through a justly made volcano and started to approach the town in a threatening, though luckily slow pace. Apple Bloom gulped and instantly ran to the nearest house. Breaking in through the window and getting several nasty cuts along her hooves, she headed straight for the bathroom, hopeful to find her target. Opening the medicine cabinet, she muttered to herself, “Please, be here!”

Meanwhile, Scootaloo returned to her scooter and took off with blazing flames following her wheels. Her wings flapped hard with haste, headed right for Rarity’s boutique. Just before reaching it, a ray of ridiculously fatal heat poured down destroying the establishment just before the pegasus pony was able to smash through the door. “So much for that plan...”

Sweetie Belle also made an attempt to help, but unfortunately, with houses burning down all around her, there was little she could do. Reluctantly, though, she ran through the hell-like landscape in desperate search for Pepto Bismol, the world’s last hope. In a sudden relief, she saw Pinkie Pie’s manner still intact and fireballs crashing down all around it. She paced herself forward, panting as she went. With a flash from behind her propelling the unicorn straight into the door, she stood, blood seeping down her muzzle and staining her coat and the left side of her mane. “I’ve... gotta find... t-the Pepto!”

Finally, with the wall of lava starting to wreck the right side of the city, all three fillies of the Cutie Mark Crusaders came galloping from all different directions, all headed for Princess Celestia. Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo clashed right into each other before the ruler of Equestria, which by the way, was being ripped to shreds by the chaotic force of her own sun. The apocalyptic occurrence was almost completed if not for the three each delivering a bottle of their own. Celestia quickly snatched them up and uncorked the bottles. Drop after drop coated her mouth and dribbled down her coat only to be caught by her magic and brought sailing back in. Not a single bit was wasted. The sky cleared up, and with her eyes turning pure white, her highness flared her horn, and everything returned to normal save for a few unlucky individuals that died in the event.

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Time Shift- I’ll try and pick this up tomorrow.
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“Well, that was... weird,” Twilight said as she looked at the feathery appendages now adorning her midriff.

“Yes, yes it was,” Celestia murmured in agreement as she sipped some Pepto-laced tea. “My stomach is still roiling.”

“Oh, yeah, that too. But... When did I get wings?” Twilight asked, her voice quavering with worry.

“Ahh yes; when an Alicorn dies, another must take their place. Since you were the strongest mare within a hundred miles that wasn’t already an Alicorn, a small portion of my powers was bequeathed upon you. You would have gained my stature as well had I died.”

“Oh....” Twilight was silent for a moment. “Is there any way to give these back...?”

“Only if you die, Twilight Sparkle.”

“Well, shoot...” Li’l Lyra and Octy giggled as they played in their tanks, watching Twilight glower at her wings.

“Though, there’s another way...”

She coyly stood from her seat and trotted off. Moments later, Twilight’s wings would be gone, and she would be left clueless as to what happened. Never would she get her answer even when she asked her mentor about it. In truth, Princess Celestia ventured to Discord to arrange a sort of deal...

Discord looked at the now purple pegasus wing on his back and shrugged. “Eh, it’s a little tacky, but I can definitely feel some of your power in them, Princess dear. I hope you don’t mind me.... testing them, hmm?”

Celestia simply answered with a sigh and a nod. Cackling with glee, Discord tapped into his new addition of strength, and raised the sun, which was now wearing shades and sporting a cool-kid smile. “Now that’s something different, haha! I’m glad I made it an adolescent, though. A baby’s face on the sun would’ve creeped even me out,” Discord told Celestia as she struggled not to cringe. “So these are for keeps?”

“It’s either you or Twilight...”

Discord giggled slightly and stated, “I can’t hold onto them forever, you know... The DNA structure isn’t fitting in with my distorted body. Soon, they’ll return to their original owner. I suggest, when that time comes, be sure Twilight thinks it’s something mystic or enchanting.

Huffing at the unfortunate outcome, she smiled letting the fiend know she’d do what she could. “I guess I can always screw with her and her friends, though I guess I would need a little... chaos to do it.”

“Oh-ho, are you proposing what I think you are?” Discord hopped on his tail and clapped his paw with his talons as he chuckled gleefully. “Oh, you’re much funner now, Celestia! When did you ever become such a troll?”

“I guess you’re just rubbing off on me.”

As the mare turned to leave, her horn ignited, and Discord found himself dressed up with a tutu like he was about practice his ballerina routine. “You know, I kinda like it...”

Author's Note:

Written by Art Inspired as part of a prompt/contest I'd won. Thanks, Art~