This is the story of Rainbow Dash and her family.
Chapters (15)
- Member Since 8th Jan, 2012
- offline last seen Sep 1st, 2023
The PatioHeater
I'm a writer for all sorts of things, pony or otherwise. Like what you read? Follow me on Patreon!
The PatioHeater
Joined 8th Jan, 2012 ·
Offline
Sequels1
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The PatioHeater · 60k words · 316 views
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.....hummmm
...W-what did I just read?
I like this, the idea really get my attention.
Wow, this is really good! Keep going!
I LIKE IT lol I truly do. Tracking.
interesting. i like where you're going with this. also, i want to murder that Celestia damned bastard
my brain cant handle all the daws
I have always considered about the mane 6's parents. We know Twilights are alive and well, we don't know how Rarity is evven related to her parents, we know that Pinkie Pie had parents, many of us assumed that Applejacks parents died after Appleblooms birth and there are numerous theories to Fluttershy's. (Either her father beat her or orphaned). This is the first one I've read about Rainbow Dashes parents. Keep up the good work
Press enter between each line plz
511612
Not really necessary to do so, as is this format is fine.
My only complaint with the story though is how can the fillies be 7 years old if the chapter is labeled 7 months? otherwise its quite a funny story.
512125
Thanks for pointing that out! I shall change it momentarily!
512125 still the extra space between the lines helps the reader
512749
Quite true, but for most as long as dialogue is apart from each other character wise it should be fine.
512891
well that may be good for you but i have to put on my glasses to read stuff that close together for that long of a time
512908
I have perfect reading eyes I guess, although that usually comes with being near-sighted.
Can you put some kind of sign that you're going into a flashback? Like some indentation or stating that it's a flashback? When you went into the flashback to her pregnancy, I was a bit lost at first.
Other than that, great story. D'aaawww to the max.
515641
Yeah, sorry about the flashback thing. My friend mentioned it as well before so I changed it a bit, but I guess not enough... But don't worry, I think I've ran out of flashbacks to write in (for now anyway).
. Ch. 4 is under construction/nearly ready, but after that, I have nothing, so it will be a while before anything else after (a few weeks probably at least...)
And I'm glad you're enjoying it
516960
Sweet, looking forward to ch 4. As for later chapters, take your time. All good things take time to create.
517349 What does? A mirror?
Nah, Im kidding. What does?
I swear, I will start saying more about Swirl in the next/one after next chapter. Just a couple things left to write before then...
dawwwwwwwwwwwww
dashie's first flight :D
great work
keep it up
Dashies first flight!
First flight~! WOOHOO
YEA BABY! Dash's first flight!
*HOOF PUMP*
What Shine ordered sounds like something I would of ordered too xD
I'm slightly disappointed with this chapter, just to let you know. But it turned out alright, I hope...
Next chapter should be better!
I liekz! too many dawwwwwws to handle
Dashie is awsum!
RainbowXJet Stream
I've been sitting on this chapter for three weeks now, all done and dusted, waiting for the previous one to be finished.
I swear it was better a few weeks ago...
632196
Rainbow Shine is best mother.
I am thoroughly enjoying this story Mr/Mrs. Outdoor Heating Appliance, Keep up the good work.
Don't worry about it not being good, it's definitely good. When Shine was crying I was like NUUUUUU. But yeah, your descriptions of what's going through her head are truly excellent, the pacing is pitch perfect, and you manage to introduce new backstory and characters without it seeming completely random. Seriously, awesome job so far, and I eagerly await every new update! The only minor thing is that having 4 characters named Rainbow is a tad confusing. I know when you say Rainbow you usually are referring to the mother, so it's not that big a deal.
KEEP BEING AWESOME
632422 It's Mr, just to let you know.
I genuinely felt happier for reading your comment!
And thank you very much!
I'm amazed that you found it that good. I found the pacing a little off myself, especially with the violin bit (music/dancing is the hardest thing to right!).
But yes, thank you again! Hopefully, my updates won't be so far spaced for the next chapters, although with exams coming up I should really revise (but that's boring!)
And I take it you were confused by the names, as you referred to Rainbow Shine being a mother when she is (so far) a six year old filly. But no biggy!
632528
but yeah, the music section was completely fine, usually they're drawn out too long and become really cliche, so it was refreshing, but to the point. GOOD LUCK ON YOUR EXAMS.
Right, brainderp there.
632558 THANKS!
You deserve this.
D'aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaw. So cute!
I can only describe this chapter as cute. Rainbow acted just like anyone who was reminiscing, happy until trailing into those painful memories.
overall probably my favorite chapter.
This was... just plain adorable. Seriously, all my d'aws! And I really mean ALL of them
Really can't wait for the next chapter! No need to rush anything however, it's always worth to wait for the great stuff. And this is definitely worth the wait
Also best of luck on your exams! Hope you'll pass it with flying colors so you'll be able to focus on the story more :)
633410, 634536 and 635204, Thanks for the kind comments a lot!!!
Hopefully I can keep up this quality. I already have the starts/parts of the next couple of chapters, but that may take a while with revision and the fact I want to write a book (which is based on one of my unposted fic ideas).
But yes, I'm glad you enjoy this. Dramaticness coming up soon, just to keep you intrigued...
I'm lovin this story.
Just one request though. When you talk about the mother, can you call her Rainbow, and her kids their last names, like Dash, Shine and so forth. It's just a tad bit confusing for me when I read two Rainbows in the same sentence even though they mean two different ponies.
638771 I'm glad you're enjoying it.
And about your request, I already do that. I make sure to only refer to the mother as Rainbow, unless it's a character refering to them by the name and it's not confusing (and only Rainbow is ever referred to as Swirly, as Nana is the only one who can use that name). If I've messed up anywhere I apologise.
Short and pointless, but I just had to write a scene like this. It wouldn't be right to write a story about young children without one of them having a nightmare.
It was better the other night when I wrote it, I swear...
As for later chapters, I've decided that 7 Years old will be a hectic time, so I will split it into one for each of the children. Also, dont expect them until after 22nd of July, for I don't want to distract myself too mch form exams... (and that's the date of my last one.)
so much d'awwwws..... :3
A revision to my previous comment:
Expect later chapters whenever. I have no discipline to revision and so will work on stories when I like.
And thanks 674899, that's what I was going for.
674959 well you hit the mark 120%. One of the best, if not the best fic that i've ever read. dash is best pony
674969 While I'm not entirely sure about the relevance of the percentage, I'm glad/thankful for your exageratioin of this being the best fic you've ever read (unless it's the only fic you've ever read). And I also agree wholeheartedly that Dash is best Pony!
674991 you hit the mark 100%, then its 20% cooler because dash is in it
I think I know were you scall go in the plot.
675047 Oh yeah?!
)
TELL ME!
(I want to know so I can throw a curveball at you
675074 It very easy to explain: The nightmare you toke in the current filly will be happening for real. SPOILER ALERT
675098 I see...
Now to rewrite the next four chapters!!!
(Or maybe not...
)