Writing is the latest trend in Equestria. It seems like everypony is trying their hoof at it, even the mane 6. Due to the large number of novice writers, bad writing is cropping up everywhere. Seeing the need, a group of elite writers and editors formed a review group. Its goal: Training the writers of Equestria. Calling themselves the T.W.E. for short, they seek out bad writing in all it's forms, and train the novice writers, one review at a time. The mane six will all have to take the criticism, but they don't have to take it well. Will they be able to get past it and keep writing, or will Ponyville be destroyed by their bad reactions?
Chapters (1)
I... I don't know how to react to this. The TWE, for those who don't know...
SO FUCKING EXCITED, READING NOW!
1682887
BE EXCITED!
First bit of my review?
Space out the paragraphs, please. You've got the indenting alright, but the paragraphs need empty lines between them. Reading on. Gonna keep posting chunks of review here, but Squared iterated what I was gonna say.
I'll withhold my upvote for the moment.
..Oh no a death fi--
Wait what?
cdn.derpiboo.ru/media/BAhbBlsHOgZmSSJTMjAxMi8xMS8yNC8wN180Ml8zMF84MjBfMTYxMzUyX19VTk9QVF9fc2FmZV9seXJhX3JlYWN0aW9uX2ltYWdlX2FydGlzdF9kYWZ0bGVzBjoGRVQ/161352__safe_lyra_wat_reaction-image_wut_artist-daftles.png
1682893 I... this...
*Sierra gets up and walks out of FiMFiction*
1682908 Agreed.
I'm soo reading this. Like seriously!
dis gun b so gud...
Edit: This story has a great plot, but the only problem that I managed to see was the paragraph spacing, but none else. In general, this story has a great potential ahead, keep writing!
I have no idea how to take this. Does this count as meta?
Ah, so it's published now?
A couple things:
1) Double-space your paragraphs. Yes, I know books don't do this. However, books have pages that are a few hundred words per page. This is a few thousand words of scrolling, so it's easier to read if the paragraphs are spaced out.
2) Your indenting is massive. I'd halve the indenting space that you're currently using.
That said, have a thumb and a fave.
1682938
Yes. Yes it does.
Source: the FAQ.
I am conflicted. It's a meta fic, which is against the rules, but somepony approved it . . . report, or no report? It's not all that bad, but the reviewer in me wants to give it a good lookin' at.
A well-written, entertaining, and wholly enjoyable fic! I honestly didn't notice any mistakes, but I was caught up in the story, not the conventions. Let me just say, you're highly talented, and I really enjoyed this. I can't wait to see where it goes--the reactions and writing of the other members of the Mane Six are something that I'm looking forward to immensely.
Though, I must say, I have the strangest urge to read Eventide Shimmer and Daring Do's Spelunking Adventure...
Edit: I give this exactly two hours before it's featured. No, check that, one.
1682991
If you REALLY wanna get in-depth about it, I'd say it's not meta because, despite reviews being used, they are used in a context that is realistic. Twilight writes a story, this review comes back about that story.
The story itself is not referencing anything beyond the universe, and the 'reviewers' in question are not direct representations of TWE members. They are reviewers, they write reviews.
Generalization, but it's not meta following that.
Regidar hasn't commented yet.
1683054
I would counter-argue that the fact the the reviews make sense in context is irrelevant. It is transparently a story about the TWE - it says so in the description - and uses samples from actual TWE reviews written by actual TWE members. It's not literally "Deep Pond, Killer Steel, and Evil Homer in Equestria," but that's very obviously the gist.
. . . Evil Homer is a terrible pony name.
1683092
Granted point. The reviews themselves make sense, but how deep does the metafic rule go? I guess hazarding a report would be the smart thing to do, but just as you said, the TWE was mentioned in the description.
It still got passed. I don't think any of the moderators do their reading while drunk... so it's possible this really isn't meta.
1683060
Waiting for Armageddon....
1683114
The FAQ does say that the no-metafic rule is "primarily up to moderator discretion," so maybe whatever mod passed this particular fic thought it was worthy.
Then again, seeing some of the stuff that gets passed . . .
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Continue...
1682938 1682991:1682963 I was concerned that my use of the T.W.E. might be a problem; I was just hoping the story would be so good the mods would overlook it. I will double space my paragraphs and shorten my indents, tomorrow. I have to work soon. I have started on the second chapter which will be featuring Rarity's writing. I think the best way to avoid problems in the future will to be have a couple people review the actual piece each of the mane 6 wrote. Thus avoiding taking from reviews of other users stories. Rarity's piece is done, so, if anyone wants to volunteer...
Oh, the concept of this. I want to see more.
1683256
Wrong. A semi-colon is used for two complete, related sentences. "The odour" is not a complete sentence, thus making a semi-colon incorrect. A comma is correct in this case, I believe.
TWE? This is the most darkest day ever
1683332 OH GOD, YOUR AVATAR.
1683328
Oops. Sorry. Thanks.
1683353
What?!.... Let me guess someone- stole your sweet-roll
1683397
fc03.deviantart.net/fs71/i/2011/340/f/6/skyrim__sweetroll_by_missqueenmob-d4id016.jpg
1683407
and what do I get? No respect and guard duty?!
1683429 Got me thinking. You might be the Dragonborn, you just don't know it yet.
1683429
I kept on thinking a sweet roll was a euphemism then I found one in a dungeon. I don't know the safeties of eating one because it was in a dungeon.
Enjoyable, certainly. Could benefit from a proofreader/editor, however, as I spotted several mistakes throughout.
1683444
Thank you!^_^
1683456
Did you ever look closely to the sweet roll... What does it look like?
29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lltzgnHi5F1qzib3wo1_400.jpg
I've been waiting for a TWE-related fic for a while.
1683665 You... have?
1682991
I think it gets by because the rule was more about straight up meta-this-is-a-story-about-stories thing. This is close... but I think maybe it barely scrapes by.
1683782 Why yes.
1682938 What's the difference between meta and inception?
I have no fucking clue, because the term 'meta' is used so loosely everywhere.
I CAME
1684145
Thirty-six comments in, you came!
Here, take this trout and get to work.
Wait a minute... sin't it against the rules to post "metafiction" relating to the site and such?
1684185 I CAN'T
TALKING TO SEIRRA
1684145
Took ya long enough!
1684208 Well well.
Well.
I'm not TWE so I'm not offended by this. Not that it should be offensive.
1684201
YOU TAKE THIS TROUT AND USE IT!
And you are too in the TWE. You may never do anything constructive, but you get the club newsletter!
1684277 And?
WELL
FINE
BE DAT WAY
PINGUS
Bwahaha! All of my YES! Continue please.
I've never liked a fic before reading it...up until this story.
Will read later, but you've already got my like
1682996 I may write it at some point.
Um why is this called "The Mane Six get hit by a Train" I don't quite understand, are you trying to imply that's how they're feeling?
1688873 Yes, they are being "Trained" by the T.W.E.
1690245 I really feel stupid for asking but what is the T.W.E?
1690576 On fimfiction it's an awesome group of people that read stories and make suggestions to help improve their quality. It stands for Train Wreck Explorers. In my story, lt's an awesome group of ponies who read stories and make suggestions to improve their quality. It stands for Training the Writers of Equestria.
*puts on a Monicle, top hat, and a fake mustach*
/5
Quite, this story has inspired me to review it as it should be.
*tosses that stuff off*
AWSOME!!!! Well done, keep it up. Oh and if you do right the Eventide Shimmer and Daring Do's Spelunking Adventure i want first read.