She Tried So Hard And Got So Far, But In The End, It Didn't Really Matter
"Now, I'm gonna place a Flight Energy on this Dinosoar here...then I'm going to play a Teammate card. Obnoxie allows me to draw three cards."
Twilight took three cards from her deck, putting them into her hand. Slowly but surely, she surveyed the new cards -- two Assist cards and a Stage 2 monster. A frown settled on her face.
"Problem?" Pinkie asked, a grin forming on her own face.
Twilight scoffed. "Pinkie, please. I know this game like the back of my hoof. You're supposed to take your time examining your cards first. Rushing through it is how you make critical mistakes."
"All righty, whatever you say..."
Before proceeding, Twilight took a deep breath and studied her newly-drawn cards again.
"Place the Armor Plate Assist Tool on Dinosoar, which grants it immunity from effects of attacks. And finally..." She jabbed a hoof at the attack listed on the card. "For three Energy, I'm going to play Sonic Nightmare, for 130 hit points!"
Pinkie, keeping the smile on her face, applied the appropriate damage counters to her active monster. "Oooooh, just one off!" she said. "You got close."
"Thank you."
"Too bad it'll all be for naught."
Twilight's eyes widened slightly. She watched as Pinkie picked up a card and got the snowball rolling right down the hill.
"I'm going to play five monsters onto my Bench." she declared, as she grabbed five cards from her hand and began placing them onto the table. Twilight recognized one of the monsters as Koasion -- not just its usual basic form, but its Z form. She began to pale.
That's one of the game-breaker cards... She had seen it all too well before, reading stories of players who had been stumped by Koasion. A powerful Solar type, its main attack Cry of Penance allowed it to flip three coins to Kill a monster.
On the online game, Twilight had found a sneaky hack of sorts, one she was sure worked even if everyone told her otherwise. The way it worked was this: if she kept clicking the computer mouse as the coin was being flipped, she could obtain heads, and leaving it alone would make it tails. But this was the real world. She and Pinkie were playing a real game.
And for whatever reason, Pinkie had a tendency to flip heads most of the time.
Twilight glanced at her own Bench. None of the four monsters on it were strong enough to Kill Koasion, whether as an OHKO or otherwise. She could feel sweat beginning to pour down her face as her mind began racing through the strategies she had read online, strategies that she knew wo-
"Aaaaand with that, I win!"
Twilight blinked. Her gaze slowly moved towards Pinkie's active monster, which already had four Velocity Energy attached to it.
Said active monster just so happened to be Koasion.
"Wh- what- huh- how...Pinkie?!"
"Aww, easy!" Pinkie waved a hand. "See, Koasion has this Hidden Ability, Celestial Metamorphosis. That allows it to attach 3 Unique Energies to one of my monsters. I decided to attach them to Koasion, attached a Solar Energy to meet the attack cost, and whammo!" She giggled. "That's what you get for being distracted."
Twilight could feel her body physically deflate slightly. "But- but I studied everything! I poured weeks into pinning down the best strategies, the best cards, the best meta decks, even..." She looked in despair at her own Bench, then scoffed. "They should ban Koasion."
"Why? That's only for cards that really break the game." Pinkie said. "Koasion is the hottest monster in all the meta decks right now, and for good reason. Look at this card!"
"Pinkie, I've looked at the card already, I don't-"
"Not that card, silly!" Pinkie rummaged through her hand, taking out a Baby Koasion monster. "This one."
Twilight stared at it.
Her jaw dropped.
If this Animon is in your hand at the start of your turn, your Active Koasion may use the attacks of any of its Evolutions. These attacks are not affected by Weakness, Resistance, or any effects on your opponent's Active Animons. After you have taken three turns, put this Animon onto your Bench, or discard this Animon if your Bench is full.
"Soooooo I used its Memory Fortuna Ability to use Koasion's UV Flurry for 200 hit points, which leaves it unable to attack..." Pinkie frowned for only a moment. "But it got the job done!"
"Pinkie..." Twilight slowly slid off of the stool she was sitting on, her corona grabbing her cards and beginning to pile them up. "That's the fifth game you've beaten me at. How'd you get so good?"
The party pony didn't answer right away, instead gathering up her own cards and putting them in her saddlebag. She made sure to grab her lucky coin, too, slipping it into the front pocket. All the while, a smile remained on her face, even though Twilight's flabbergasted gaze was boring into her.
She hopped off the stool and slung the saddlebag along her back, only remembering to grab the official paper template for the game at the last minute and slipping it in.
Her mouth opened.
"I've been playing this game long before it became an Equestrian hit, Twilight." She looked back at her friend. "That's how."
Twilight just stared in disbelief.
"Well, gotta get back to the bakery! If you ever want some cooleriffic tips, come see me!" Pinkie began hopping away. "Toodle-oo to you!"
Twilight's expression began to twist.
Before she knew it, she was galloping back to the castle, saddlebag in teeth and fire in her eyes.
As she swung open the library door, Starlight jumped in her seat and stared at the alicorn for a few moments in shock before a smug smile formed on her face.
"Operation 'Buck Meta Decks' didn't work, huh? You ready to make one now?"
A huff of air blew from Twilight's nostrils as her eyes became narrowed.
"...Yes."
"Good. I'll go get the books."
I know I made the reference way too obvious, but if I'm being honest? I do not care. 
This isn't a good attempt and most definitely won't win, but I tried. That's what counts. I'll probably make four more fics for the contest and see where things go from there.
Don't take this too seriously, though. It's Pinkie. Universal law is that no one questions Pinkie.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Ah, Magic The Suffering
Could we get a sequel where twilight tries to get that card banned? Or where she goes thru a montage of trying out different decks against pinkie (and loses every time)?
Good fun
I liked this!! The dialogue felt very in character!!
Just wait until Pinkie comes back with a Lugia VStar deck.
Me: GET THE DURALADON VMAX!
11606091 More like Ma-Gi-Goemon.
11606091
You should see modern Yugioh... it's like watching the other guy play solitaire.
11606109
Oh, I'll have to set that on the back burner for sure. The sequel potential is strong with this one. And I'm all for taking my 11 years of experience playing the game and applying it to pone even more.
I was expecting them to get into an argument about banding. Sequel?
A tcg, huh? Did you maybe have one of the judges in mind when you wrote this?
Very cute little story. Best of luck in the contest!
11606375
Surprising as it may be -- I know one of 'em is a fan of MTG -- but nope. This was more of an idea that popped into my head on a whim after I realized my first idea wouldn't really work in just 1000 words.
That, and I re-read Estee's Donuts Not Of This World for the hundredth time and decided to apply it to my own favorite TCG. That too.
11606237
That terminology doesn't exist in the game I'm referencing (at least AFAIK over 11 years), but I could certainly do the research and apply it to a sequel once I put it on the front burner.
Good work Pinkie. You win again
I remember trying to beat meta decks in Yu-gi-oh years ago with non-meta decks I liked when playing yu-gi-oh! online. It didn't take me long for me to learn "If you can't beat them, join 'em."
11606227
If you write a sequel with a version of Yu-gi-oh!, I would be interested in it. The way Yu-gi-oh! is now, I pity the poor players that have to go through learning all the summoning methods, and that would be the easy part compared to learning rules like "missing the timing" or not being able to use Monster Reborn on a monster in the Graveyard that was cheated out by card effects, some of which could sound like troll logic sometimes
11606581
Oh, no, don't do that! I was being facetious.
It's from Magic: the Gathering, pertaining to a very tedious set of rules for a game mechanic that nobody used even when it was current. There are a lot of weird, non-optimized design features in old Magic.
So is this an actual game? I used to collect Magic and Yu-Gi-Oh, but that's been years and I haven't touched either in a long time. Great story though. You'd think Twilight would know better by now when it comes to Pinkie Pie.
11607651
Yes, but it's neither of the games you're thinking of. Only two people in the comments have gotten it right thus far, which just tells me I need to make a whole lot more "creatures play Animon" fics.
Plus I had to tweak the original name and concept since I wanted to stick with the originals, but I figured coming up with new monster names, types and attacks would be good writing exercise on my end.
And it keeps the references hidden...apparently just a tadtoowell.11607760
That only two even know what outside of the author that is isn't a good sign I feel.
11607769
I'm not familiar with MTG or Yu-Gi-Oh, but I wanted to put my own spin on the "ponies playing TCG" concept using the one TCG I did know. Well-known franchise, but a not-so-well-known game within the franchise, I suppose.
At the very least, it's better than the "Pinkie pranks everyone with a Mandela Effect" idea I had, which I not only couldn't fit comfortably in 1000 words but said Mandela Effect would have probably flown over a lot of readers' heads, moreso than what I referenced here. So I stuck with the TCG idea instead.
Wait...how does almost nobody know the TCG in question? Monster stages, attaching energy, the other changed terms admittedly tripped me up for all of three seconds... But then again I haven't played in like 20 years.
Regardless, a properly Pinkie take on TCG's
11607245
Hey, banding wasn't that bad. It just takes one of the most core mechanics in Magic and flips it on its head....which by extension breaks everything else...ok it's a bad mechanic but also funny.
11608357
In addition, there was another feature introduced around the time of Legends called "Bands with". So you had cards that read "Bands with other wolves", but don't think that means the card in question could be banded with wolves, which might appear to be the first and only use of said card. No fucking sir. You might as well start marking your deck, while you're at it.
Pokémon. Very funny story.
Also, I see references to Banding and 'Bands with other' in the comments. My soul hurts just seeing those words.
Greetings. Your reading has been completed and can be found below. I hope you enjoy.
if only there were a prize for the best chapter title in the contest
aww that takes me back to the early 2010s!
that’s her reality-bending powers for ya
hehe would it be called a “hand” when the ponies don’t have those?
so true actually
some very light fun, thank you for writing!
If literally every competitive deck in the format is running the card, then yes, it needs to be banned. (Long judgmental look at The One Ring.) Isn’t that right, WotC?
In any case, I have fond memories of the Pokémon TCG from way back in the day. (I dropped it shortly after Gen 2 started.) Fun stuff here… and an enjoyably menacing start to Twilight’s villain arc.
Thank you for it.
An oddball ghost happened across your fic and read it. Have a review!