It's Mare's Day in Zephyr Heights, and after having missed out last year Pipp and Zipp are keen to make this year extra special. However, when Alphabittle suddenly shows up Queen Haven is forced to have a rather frank conversation with her daughters about relationships, loss, and starting anew.
An attempt to expand on some of the themes explored in the Tell your Tale short Mare Family, Mare Problems. Inspired partly by this blogpost by Mica.
Note: Cover art is from A New Generation, as I couldn't find a TYT screenshot that fitted the story's themes.
Chapters (1)
great story mate keep it up
11578753
Cheers!
Sure was a disaster...
I'm not even gonna ask why...
11578912
Thanks. The episode this was based on was a bit of a mess.
11578822
1. If nothing else it perfectly demonstrates that you never ask the question 'how hard can it be'.
2. Yeah, that was silly. They don't need to infiltrate the palace! It's one of several homes for them!
Boy, did the episode give fuel to all the Alphabittle and Haven shippers.
11578968
Aww, thanks.
11579004
It certainly did. A shame the rest was a bit sub-par. They really should have saved this plotline for Make your Mark.
I appreciate that episodes based on miscommunication are dumb. I would like to point out that you have replaced it with anything, and what you've written is super boring and nothing important happens. You can't just complain about someone else's work, you have to add literally just _something._
11579050
I don't follow.
11579163
There's no hook, there are no stakes, and nothing of interest happens. The only thing the story is going for it is that it has characters make decisions that draw attention to foolish dishes that characters made in a different story that this is based off of, which means that the entire draw of the story is a writer complaining about a different writer. That's just not good writing.
11579210
It would appear I have fallen into the fixfic trap.
This feels incomplete. It feels like there's a story to be written about Alphabittle trying to keep up with Pipp and Zipp to impress Queen Haven, and Queen Haven having to tell her daughters that she and Alphabittle are in fact a couple.
Huh this was pretty something nothing really happened but I guess they talk about the situation hopefully those two doesn't take the wrong way what was the situation and to be honest I was hoping something else is going to happen but nothing I mean it's interesting to avoid the problem but I guess I was expecting something a shipping thing but I guess not but whatever it's an interesting one keep up the good work
11579268
11579457
The irony of this story is not lost on me-in trying to critique a story I thought was a mess, I've only created a mess. This is going in for pretty heavy retooling and editing.
11579764
Seems not everybody feels this way, though. The reception's pretty negative.
Oh well. You can't win them all.