Naruto Uzumaki is lost to Konoha when he vanishes durring an attack on his life. He winds up in the magical land of Equestria in under the care of a certain Zebra. But this is only the beggining as much larger things are in story for are young traveler. Watch as he grows and faces numerous challenges caused by his past and his future.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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I'm not sure if you realize, But You misspelled "Uzumaki" in the summary.
...Next chapter!
ALLONS-Y!!!
Oh Naruto...You know just how to get under Shining's skin, Dont'ya?
Wow...Kyuubi Ponification......Hmmm....Wait....My brain's hatching an idea.....
O.o PAWS.
They have DIGITS on their LIMBS.
Digits can be manipulated.....But the question is...Can Chakra flow through them correctly?
Your spellcheck is already fried.
1202964 you thinking of a terrible finger jutsu kakashi used?
Note: Most of the errors are acceptable and we can understand but you said that was the kyuubi's final cures instead of curse. PM me and I can help more.
Heres a freebie. Quit being lazy and make a proper line break for both stories.
Your dialouge is calm and too excepting in both stories. Try writing a Twi Freak Out fic. I think it will help.
1203327
Wha-? You talking about the Thousand years of Pain? Because I was talking about the hand signs for molding Chakra. Tell me, Do you think Paws could manipulate Chakra as well as Fingers? I'm really curious, myself.
1203554 it takes focus, plus they can send chakra anywhere, now it is just more refined. The symbols are just for control after all.
1203554
Well, if you ever followed the Naruto series I recall the Toad Summons capable of using jutsu's
A Naruto/MLP crossover?
Well the reception for this one was much better than my other. Thank you DerpedRainbow for pointing out the issue with the curse, I am off to correct theat right now.
Problem with Line breaks, They refuse to be fucking deleted. But I will try to start putting them in before I post.
1203901 Fins. Close enough to digits, also, They're Summons. Their Chakra (reportedly) works a bit differently.
1203927
cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/23901400.jpg
Normally I don't like reading crossovers like this but this one is interesting I'm gonna follow it
this is almost as good as "Friendship contrat"
I just had an idea on what to call them. I say we call them Kyuubicorns!
My mind has been blown!PLease make more chapters!
Please update
Good story :)
Do continue.
Write more please it is awesome
MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR
... Now this is really more of a wrap up for the events of the previous chapter. My next one will hopefully be longer and I plan to step away from the depressing atmosphere. I did a few minor corrections before posting it on the sight so hopefully it meets your standards.
I just love how this is different from most naruto crossovers. Can't wait for more
yes!
nice touch with narutos parents that strted to make me think what happens
NICE WORK!
more write more heeheehee
I like the story itself, nice premise using Zecora, but I must say that you need an editor. Spell check is only as good as its name, it only corrects spelling errors and minor grammatical errors. Your missing whole words in some areas as well as using the wrong tense in others. Still, I will be tracking this as it seems interesting.
Another great chapter, I am looking forward to reading more. I do believe that you should look for an editor, there are just a few places where you miss a word or contraction, that spellcheck over looks.
Nice. I like where this is going. Are you going to continue with them as foals, or will there be like a time skip to when Twilight meets the rest of the Mane six? Either way, I eagerly await the next update.
They will continue as foals for a while. I personally hate time skips that turn the characters into powerhouses. You have no clue what happened other than they trained. It bugs me you know. My question always is, how did they train? What did they train in? How effective was it?
All of that gets lost in the time skip.
Very nice story. I like where you're taking this and hope you still plan to continue.
i love it
I made an account, just so I could comment on this.
What you have so far is awesome. You've broken from the structures Naruto came here and was a badass, and actually meshed him well with the indigenous and environment in a totally believable way in the given canon.
I love what you've done, and will gladly be waiting for more.
Thank you Flutter is Shy for the review. I am working on the next chapter now and have about 2000 words down already.
This is a badass story, I'am really liking this. It's far to rare to see Zacora let alone see her with such an important place. I also liked how you tweaked the original story but didn't bullocks it up(or go off in a completely new direction, which wouldn't be bad just intresting to see how it will play out). Iam diffenitly going to be keeping an eye on this one.
this is beautiful i wanna keep reading
Now THIS is interesting....I'll have to keep an eye on this!
A very good start
Not to big on the physical changes but i can deal
1786851
Thank you!
How are you doing?
2450193
Stuck. I am horribly horribly stuck. I am great at creating a concept but when I go to execute it I lose steam. I barely have a thousand words for chapter four and I have deleted it at least three times now.
2450231 thats sucks need any idea's thrown your way?
or maybe you just need some comedy relief
how's this
media.pinkiedb.com/photos/Celestia/Celestia/Alfalfa%20Monster.png
or this
or how about this
any of those do it for you? i got more
2450231
Then forget about it for now. Ramming yourself repeatedly against the wall when you're in a rut isnt going to help. Inspiration comes usually when you ARENT thinking about it. You know what you should do? A writing excercise. Take a single subject, say.....A tree. write about a tree, and what it see's in its inanimate day, those that walk around it, the animals that may or not live in its branches, just as example. Just try to write a short story about something that has NOTHING to do with your current written blocked work. Beating yourself up wont help you. I wish you luck. and have a nice day!
i don't think you failed it was masterfully done even if you didn't go beyond the current story if another author should take over they could bring new ideas to the story you had already set i think you did very well and should be praised for it and i cant wait for more when the next person takes over give yourself a pat on your back and sing you did good
While is a shame that you have given up on this story, I do hope that maybe either you or the next author will continue it, that and you update with a "chapter" that will link us to the sucesor story, but if I am frank on the matter, I really hope you could go continuing the story and the next chapte would be a timeskip to Episode 1, any other plothole would have been explained there or in future chapters when brought back into light depending the situation, I was really looking for the Zecora chapter and how different would have been their reactions specially with Twilight and Naruto flying tackle Zecora into a hugh with Twilight screaming happly "Mrs. Zecora!" and Naruto "MOTHER!", leaving the other girls surprised that unexpected twist
I do really hope you regain the will to keep writing this great story and post a chapter of it soon, however it seems that I should give you a Thanks for bringing us such a great story, even if it didn't lasted long and died very young, thanks for the memories I guess, this story was on my top 5 of my D.E.A.R. (Droop Everything And Read) both in Fanfiction.net and FIMFiction.net
2784878
This was something I myself saw happening but I went about it the wrong way. I have honestly considered doing a full rewrite but as time when on I chose to go further. I may put out a new story that is similar to this but there will be some big differences.
One, they will be humans on all sides. The ponies and other species shall be humanized but there will be defining traits.
Two, probably gonna ignore the kyuubi for a good long time. I keep going back to the last chapter and thinking, I have made mary and gary stu.
Three, I need to come up with a story line either before hand or have Naruto much older when he meets Twilight. Though I have an idea where instead of moving to Canterlot he instead visits it with his mother. I feel this will help me stretch it out much further as periods of months pass between each visit.
You see, I already have ideas on how to redo the story into something better. I just seriously lost my zeal for writing this one. While I love the responces I get from everyone a fanbase does not encourage me to write. I have to like what I am writing. It is why Mixed Drinks has so many chapters is because I like writing it.
I will attempt this again in the future but it will be different. All you will be able to trace back to this was that it was inspired by Naruto Rhymes. Hopefully you all like that version as well but I have a lot of work to do before hand.
I have to agree with what was already said.
Even if you haven't written this story further than it is at the moment, you DO have created something that's a work of art. Not many people can claim that, and compared to some others... myself included... you're brave to have posted this story here even without a finished draft.
For that I envy and admire you.
Recently I have looked over my own works again, and I have to say compared to your work... mine are best called amateurs dreams, full of plot holes with barely any substance behind it.
While it is a shame that you probably won't continue this story it is still good that you posted your idea.
Ideas give us imagination, imagination births creation, and creation brings us closer together.
I say you have done one of the most selfless things possible, you have created a solid foundation on which others can build upon, to expand, to create.
If whoever takes this responsibility up does make it work... then you can be proud... proud because it wouldn't have been possible without your foundation.
For that is all ideas are about. Without ideas and others to build upon, we wouldn't have this wide an array of stories to read. So even if it isn't finished, even if it doesn't go further, you set the stone rolling, and once you've set a stone rolling it'll create something, give birth to something. Wether if it's good or bad remains to be seen, however if we knew the outcome it wouldn't even be half as fun don't you agree?
Hey, it's all good. Sometimes, you think you have something going and, when it hits something, you got nothing. But what you did write so far is a rather good story, that'll act as a starting point for the next person to continue.
It was good. I can't wait for your next story.