• Published 1st Apr 2020
  • 6,615 Views, 53 Comments

A Mute Cantata - Some Leech

While tending to the VIP meet-and-greet at one of Octavia's shows, Sign discovers something rather interesting about the musician...

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Comments ( 45 )

Hmmm... I Like it. Keep it up!

Lmao thought it said A Mute Canada.

As a fan of Octavia it was difficult for me to get around the fact that she was the one with the dick. But the story was so well done that I can gloss over that detail without issue. Bravo.

Same, but leech pulled it off so well that he swayed me on that matter.~

Yeah definitely check out the previous stories because they are great. Sign is mute but has the ability to form words and phrases on her body for people to read.

yeah but unfortunately afaik most o' stories with her are also with Anon... am i right?

I remembered wrong. I was thinking of Clopficisinthecomments' stories about Sign. :twilightsheepish:

Gokart #10 · April 2nd · · 1 ·

yeah that's him. However both unfortunatelly has Anon involved.

I'm going to admit that it's just odd for me to think of Octavia as NOT being in a relationship with Vinyl.

But I do like Sign, and this was hot. So that made up for it!

(Also, my upvote brought the story to 69. Hoho.)

a story about one of my favorite OC pony,s with art from zippy how could i not enjoy reading and it was awesome :D

This was a awesome end hope for a sequel.

Sign is definitely one of my favorite OCs, glad to see another author's take on her (especially with Octy as a bonus :twilightsmile:)

Really great story, hoping for a continuation. But I did notice one or two errors, like this one.

“My, that certainly is a fascinating ability, Miss…” Octavia trailed off, realizing she hadn’t caught the unicorn’s name.

Octavia says she hadn't gotten Sign's name but when they're walking to the dressing room a bit before this she calls Sign by her name. Just some food for though. Still a great story though.


When you're getting confused with an author as good as Some Leech it's quite the compliment! Enjoying the story.

well.. since i don't really like anthro, i find u better in some ways.
That and also ur stories seem to have more emotions, and the general background and diversity ... (although after some time also begin to repeat a little) than some Leech's stories. However, this does not mean that Leech is a bad author.

Stop, you'll make me blush. You're one of the reasons I started writing.

So, I noticed that in Chapter 2, Octavia addresses Sign by name in the start, but then has to ask Sign her name not a paragraph later. I'm guessing that's just a minor case of forgetfulness?

It just goes to show how good both of you are at writing; it takes skill to make a reader forget the differences between up and down from time to time! :raritywink: :heart:

Wow. Thanks, that really makes my day! :twilightsmile:

Very cool! Not a fan of some of the terminology but the vast majority of it I was HELLA into.

The singular for testes is testis

> furiously dabs

Not gonna lie, that cover art made it seem like this would be a scary story. Please respond to this comment.

I mean, did you read the description and/or tags?

No horror tag whatsoever. What?

You proofed once again, just what an amazing writer you are.:twilightsheepish:

No Patrick, penis is not an instrument

If you're going to be anal about proper plurals, maybe look up how to spell "testicle" before posting?

Exceptional, what a fantastic read. Thumbs up! 👌

Aquel #33 · April 5th · · 7 ·

I have not often beheld such rambitious parlance with it's myriad alliteration which have offendingly, addlingly adynamic additions, giving worthwhile verse as dust gives luster. This is as a sojourn to the trite ideations a beggar may have of refination and is in fact, besides self-fellatio, it's own refutation.
The authors of this work may do well to explore what it means to be sententious: The least foreshortening of prose may make a briefer, more pleasant experience of this luxuriously risible affair of a porn fic, less distractedly mockable than it currently is.
Drop the thesaurus heck dang it.

I just read a lot :fluttershbad:

(Wew, this got longer than I expected, but it's 7 AM and I'm wordy. And I wanted to give some advice besides a half-cranky, half-amused purple prose lump.)
On a more serious note, the purplyness hit me hard yeah. I get you're trying to have a more elegant tone than usual for several reasons, but elegance is wit and wit is brief. Don't be baroque with that prose!
There's several times where words surprised me, either because they seemed out of place or I hadn't read them in years; Betwixt was one I though meant only intervening time, though I understood what you meant with it and it turned out to be proper usage, but could've been easily replaced with between to not be so distracting for its rarity. Another was "Prick" a few times, which afaik refers to small dicks. "Blood" (When talking about her dick being engorged) was unpleasant because when I'm reading porn I don't typically like imagery being about blood, generally bad practice to evoke the wrong or unpleasant imagery with language. "Vascular" makes me think of medical contexts (I used to make this mistake) or cooking. All four of these broke the flow of the prose for their own reasons.
Then there was some imagery I found funny, which isn't bad but I assume was undesired. "Clandestinely choking", "Errant cum", "Furtive fellatio", there's one or two more I can't link to because of the SFW-only rule, those evoked the wrong imagery also. Words tend to have a certain texture about them that writers should be mindful of.
I get the feeling you're trying to avoid repeated imagery and word usage, but don't be so afraid, sentence structure can be used to avoid having to name something more than once per phrase (Or more. Once you've established a subject you can just keep referring to it without fear, "The feather fell drawing long, lazy arcs across the air, briefly gaining height before time and time again losing it. One could have watched it for hours, calmly, if it only took so long to hit the grass".) Then there's the second issue of lewd writing having to last longer than is needed to describe something, for the sake of the audience getting off. Can't give you an easy answer on that front, would if I could.

But yeah. Try taking a paragraph of something, whatever, you've written and making it as concise as you can, just removing any decoration and wording that makes it longer than it needs to be, and doing this once in a while as an exercise. The best writing is just enough, not too little and not too much, or to say it more prettily, poetic language should be a highlight for seasoning, not the main course. Or for narrator characterization in certain cases (Looks like it's what you were doing here, a friend mentioned you don't always have this issue)) But then you should have fun with characters talking rudely in the middle of elegant prose, or the POV character being surprised and breaking to more broken, rude, or otherwise affected wording. Always fun when the priest loudly curses. And even then it shouldn't be overbearing.

On the brighter side, there was some I did like here. The paragraphs have a nice, unimpending sentence structure partly because the prose, even if purple, generally brings emphasis to what it should. "Inch by inch", "Pressing her snout", "Taking the lack of response", they bring focus to where they should and only then the rest of the scene using only structure, without falling into a rhythm that's predictable and as a result stiff and awkward. No "X did thing. Y did thing. X did thing. Y did thing" for an example of bad structures. The wording, even if you should tone that down, also didn't repeat itself too much for what it's worth. Now you only have to find the middle point, which I think is easier from the extreme you're at.

Sounds like a personal problem.

Maybe they can be in a polyrelationship (more than 2 ponies)

I dig your bio mate, good shit :trixieshiftright:

I would love to see a continuation/full story of this. It's just cute enough to keep you wanting more, and sexy enough to make you wish you were there~.

You'll be seeing more of Sign soon, no worries!
Hope you stay tuned! ^^

What he said.

I just love characters that allow people to be as creative as can be. That's why my fav character is discord, no boundaries for the writer

Have to say, you taught me some new vocabulary, and your thesaurus was pretty on-point, too. I particularly enjoyed your use of "patina". That being said, the story itself was a great read. The clop was good and active, constantly moving forward with interesting bits and events (like the hoof bite and its explanation), and it didn't excessively drag itself out. There was just enough setting and background material to keep the story together while also creating a thoughtful experience that fleshed out the interaction. This is the first story of yours that I've read, though I believe I've seen your name tossed around under a few images. Very satisfying work!

If I had to leave any major complaints, it'd be that I felt like there was a word missing here and there and you might want to work on your comma placement just a hair.

P.S.: Don't worry about someone calling you out on 'purple prose.' A little bit of color in your descriptions isn't going to hurt anyone, and some of us actually like seeing that kind of illustrative effort. Done right (as here, largely), makes it more vivid. :ajsmug:

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