The story of Twilight Sparkle and friends has ended. But a new story is being written, starring Equestria's mysterious new heroine dubbed the Mysterious Mare-Do-Well.
A Darkwing Duck inspired fimfic.
Chapters (7)
- Member Since 10th Jun, 2015
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Phantom-Dragon
An Asian-American brony who is a fan of Spike, Discord, and Jackie Chan.
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Hmm... Yes, this is definitely quite a start for what kind of series you've got going surrounding the Mysterious Mare Do Well. It tells a bit about what our hero is like, but it also keeps it as vague as possible especially without revealing who our mysterious hero is. It's rather sad to be that one pony in town that nobody ever knows, not even for the Party Pony to know about. Still, what this first log shows is that the escapades of our favorite Mane Six have definitely made a difference for this one unknown pony so much that she decides to be a superhero in some way. I'd bet she was there when she first saw the 'Mysterious Mare Do Well' back when Rainbow Dash needed a lesson in humility (Though we'd have to wonder what her reaction was when she found out her heroes first came up with the idea or... If they never told any other pony about it, who knows?).
When it comes to the first night on the job, especially in the big city like Manehatten, you never know what to expect. True a fight with petty crooks robbing a jewelry store doesn't sound as exciting for up-and-coming young heroes, but for the Mare-Do-Well it's a rather nice warm-up before the heavy stuff comes into play. After all, we got to see her apply her martial arts training to good use and while she's no Bruce Lee by any means she can definitely hold her own even when the numbers game seems overwhelming. Still, she does make a good point: Superhero work doesn't always pay the bills and so she'll need at least some place of employment to pay for any stuff she may need without giving away the fact that she is the Mysterious Mare-Do-Well (Unless she never takes her outfit off). Course, if Manehattan isn't offering any places of employment at any time she'll definitely need to find a place at some point in her young career.
For some reason I got a “The Dark Knight Returns” vibe from the title image, despite it referencing “Batman: The Animated Series.”
Neat start to this
I'm liking this so far
While going over this one line, I had to recall what the 'Mysterious Mare Do Well' said about herself. If she said that she herself cannot fly and only Pegasi can get into Cloudsdale, you must wonder how she was even able to get there if she doesn't know a thing about magic.
Awesome. Love how you laid this chapter out like an actual newspaper article and such
I love how the newspaper gig gives a shoutout to much of what we already know about the Gen 4 universe. Whether it's referencing characters we've followed from the series, exploring what they've been doing sine the series end, or just sharing ideas for FanFic writers on what over stories to do, it's a great way to build up on The Mare-Do-Well finding a job when it's not fighting crime. I chuckled at the part that reveals where one of the thugs names is 'Steve', it's like...
"Oooh... Watch out for Steve!"
- Was he the dumb stallion with the baseball bat?
- No stupid, it was obviously the guy who couldn't hold his own with the magic business.
GUYS! Trying to write my thoughts on this chapter.
- You have to forgive them, Mr. Dramamaster. They are idiots.
- *Both* HEY! (OYE!)
*Clears throat* Ahem... Anyways, this is almost like the end of the start of an epic series where it has the hero doing awesome deeds with a pledge to be the hero making the world a better place... Ending comically with the hero searching through newspapers to find a suitable job.
As far as the jobs our mysterious figure aims to explore... Yeah I can imagine that things could easily go wrong, really fast.
You know, the more I look at this part, what feels like a random set of articles at first may turn out to be a subtle way of foreshadowing what's to come should this become an ongoing series.
1. When we first see Luster Dawn during the finale, she came completely out of nowhere and the most we know of this wee lassie is that she is Twilight Sparkle’s prized student as Twilight was for Celestia (A reflection of past meets future so to speak). We know that Luster Dawn values hard work yet struggled in the friendship department thinking there was no need for her to do so in the first place. What we can assume is that this takes place long before the events we see in the finale, meaning this must’ve happened before Luster Dawn moves to Ponyville to give friendship a fair chance. If she is to play somewhat of a role in what happens in the life of the mysterious superhero, this FanFic may be yet another opportunity to expand on whatever character she could use for further development. Otherwise, when fans look at her, they automatically see Luster Dawn as another ‘Twilight Sparkle’ unless proven otherwise.
2. For me, seeing Gallus enrolled as a Canterlot Royal Guard was quite a surprise for me and yet one would call it a welcome relief. As we know when it comes to the Royal Guard, they have this repertoire of getting beat up by nearly every Equestria villain, having said villains break into their castle six or seventeenth times that some fans think these ponies are just REALLY bad at their jobs. Still, Gallus wanted to be a Royal Guard for a reason, I may not know what said reason that may be but he seems aspired to make a difference with what is rumored that he has done to get him and his friends their own stained glass window. No doubt that even if there is peace amongst all the species by the time of Twilight’s full rule, there are still some challenges for Gallus being a guard if we were to take the ‘racial barrier’ arc out of the question. If anything, he might be one of those guards who feel like the last thing Equestria needs is a vigilante superhero who’s not even saving the world under the Princess’s orders.
3. Fans can say what they want about Lyra and Sweetie Drops being a canon couple and not just ‘best friends’, but at this point it’s difficult to nearly imagine seeing either of these ponies with any pony else. As it seems, these two have been rather busy ever since they got hitched and by the look of this article they’ve had tons of adventures together. Are there still challenges even for a couple who seems to have the picture-perfect image of happiness? Absolutely, even my own parents have their disagreements even though their love for each other still holds up. We may not know if the extent of their relationship may be worth exploring during the course of this series, but if anything perhaps the overall theme of what their relationship means for the future of MLP may be a key factor in this ‘Gen 4.5’ so to speak.
4. Of all the ponies I can ever see being a ‘philanthropist’ in Equestria, I confess that the last thing I ever imagined was Diamond Tiara, along with Silver Spoon. But then again, ever since Diamond Tiara’s reformation we hardly see much of her and as we’ve seen it almost feels like Cozy Glow was brought in to essentially replace who the CMC’s former antagonist would’ve been (At least based on what I think). Still, there is a motivation as to why Diamond Tiara wants to open a home for ponies who have either felt forgotten or abandoned, lost ponies and creatures trying to find their way. We may not know the full extent of their ‘business partnership’, but if this series offers an opportunity to branch out Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon I’d be curious to see what’s up. If anything, if not for this series, it can always be worth looking into through another fanfic.
5. Move aside ‘Dazzlings’, we’ve got a new trio of performers worth looking into. Now there may be some things we know little about when it comes to Sapphire Shores (There’s been conflicts about what her cutie mark is) while Rara and Songbird Serenade have each made ‘one’ appearance in the show itself (Technically Serenade was a guest star for a movie with very few scenes), but there have been some interesting stories that see the three together. A concept of deploying this Music Fest may prove to be a rather entertaining story for the Mare-Do-Well to be involved with especially if these three VIPs may be at risk of any danger. If anything, whomever this Mare-Do-Well is, she might be a fan of their music and perhaps indicating something we may not know about her until later. I certainly feel this is more than just a random shout-out but rather purposely done to indicate something to watch out for in the future.
Yes. Wonderful work.
Life as a vigilante is indeed never easy and the Mysterious Mare-Do-Well is no exception. Sure she managed to steer the beast away from the city, even though her actions inadvertently caused a blackout. But there'll always be critics out there who claims she is just some wannabe superhero in a mask trying to do a job reserved for the police (Even though one can argue the police are no better than the Canterlot guard). Still, if our Mysterious little lassie hadn't taken the time to keep the beast distracted than good ole Rainbow Dash wouldn't have shown up to finish the mess even though the Mare-Do-Well did most of the work. But again, a hard aspect of trying to be a superhero: It's tough to be a hero when you're under the shadow of the more famous ones (Saitama can vouch on that one, even though most of his efforts cause severe damage to the city).
Anyways, thanks to some sound advice from a notable member of the Mane Six, only now is the Mare-Do-Well starting to see that even she, for all her skills, cannot manage to fight crime by herself. She's going to need a team with their own set of skills to help get her act together as a hero even though she cannot just go around jumping in front of ponies and say 'Hey, I'm the Mysterious Mare-Do-Well'. With no visible description of to who this character is (Probably the kind who hides her face under a hat), we have no idea as to who this pony is and in a way it's almost like trying to figure out who's the 'V' in 'V for Vendetta'. Still, if 'Hope Hollow' could be her way to truly get started as a hero, a tiny town that probably doesn't have much security as Manehattan, this would be the perfect place for her to prove herself as a hero. And we do know some ponies there who could probably help with some requirements she's going to need for the remainder of the series.
As of now, this series is mainly written from the perspective of the Mysterious Mare-Do-Well, in an autobiography format. Which does beg the question if this is to be the recurring style for the remainder of the series or if this is more like a prequel for what's to come.
You know what's also funny, just the other night I was watching the latest episode of 'The Masked Singer' (Technically it was two considering one was delayed for the World Series) and I was reflecting on what I talked about in regards to the three Equestria singers as highlighted in newspaper fashion. And it had me wondering how the Mare-Do-Well's musical chops might be, especially if her costume could be an advantage for her. After all, it seems when this lassie puts on the mask and attire she can be any kind of pony she wants to be, a mere opposite of this 'fan girl' and 'make the world a better place' persona she's got going on. Plus, if no one can see what she looks like or has any expectations, all the more being able to perform any way she'd want to without any judgment. The only difference between this and 'The Masked Singer' is that, hopefully, she doesn't have to take off her mask if she 'loses' or at least if it were a contest.
This is definitely an interesting read. It could do with a quick round of editing spit and polish {mainly the odd misspelling and grammar error} but I like the balance of lighthearted yet down to earth internal monologue and action scenes. It's going on my tracking list for sure.
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Where?
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Okay, mostly grammar.
is -> was
Lo and behold, something did happen.
Should be a capitalized "It"?
More than three dots in a row tends to look weird.
The comma seems a bit extraneous.
gemstone, trouble - singular.
"I didn't study martial arts for nothing."
Jaw.
Tenses - the narrative is using past tense up to that point, then briefly switches to present. "They were all stallions, though one of them was a unicorn and the other was another earth pony."
"Every opening." It seems you use plurals instead of singular nouns quite a bit for some reason.
"hangs depends" - I'm guessing it was supposed to be either hangs or depends?
Two spaces between "their mentalities" nevermind I guess that was a weird copypaste?and "muscle power".Crash into - yeah, that's supposed to be present tense.
Look, don't blame me, blame English.
"before I punched him in the jaw, knocking several of his teeth out"
Either "a decent job" or "decent work", hold the "a".
To be in the service of someone means that you're serving them - so this would mean that the police is working for MMDW, rather than the other way around.
"the hardest thing about"
I still need to go through the third and fourth chapter if you'd like. Overall, it's basically just small stuff though.
It's a good thing our 'Mysterious' little friend managed to find an affordable house to move into, since she'll be staying in Hope Hollow for a while. But you know: That is a funny thing about dreams. Often times, I'd have this seemingly random dream about something happening and sure enough, though it may take a while, I find at some point in my life the moment is 'exactly' how I dreamed it (Even if it wasn't 'me' behind a certain event). Anyways, that premonition is definitely trying to tell our heroine something or maybe it's symbolism of some form of insecurity that we as an audience may know next to nothing about. Whatever the case may be, thus far it hasn't stirred any trouble with her move to Hope Hollow.
Though I wonder if she arrived in costume or in her 'civilian' mode, just rather unnamed according to us and the citizens. Because if she came into town always dressed in her costume, the Mayor and his new wife may have a few 'questions' about why a masked pony would want to move in a quiet little town like Hope Hollow. Course, little do they even realize, it probably won't even stay quiet forever.
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Of course she presented herself as a civilian. I just added that in the context.
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That definitely helps out; otherwise, I was going to have to leave it all up to interpretation.
Awesome work, I can wait to see how the job hunt goes for her.
10026935
It's not going to be easy, I can imagine. If every show that featured a protagonist's 'job hunt' is any consideration, I kind of know how it likely plays out. One minute the protagonist is introduced to a job, they try it out for a while, something bad usually happens (Like an unintentional mess, something going haywire, the customers covered in goop, etc.), either the managers verbally tell them 'they're fired' or they don't have to say anything more besides giving them that look that lets the audience know it's not working out, and that leaves the protagonist scratching off every job they tried out for until the frustration or disappointment builds up.
In which case, for our mysterious friend (Who's identity she's keeping concealed) , she'll try her best to find some work but some of her habits might get in the way. It'll just be a matter of finding some work that fits just along her skill set. Keeping those fingers crossed.
Well, I have to say, this DOES look like it could be an intriguing story. I have to admit, the fanpony gushing concerning the Mane Six from the new Mare Do Well was some really good detail. At least we know none of the Mane Six are going to be the "Gizmoduck" so to speak (though Twilight MIGHT end up becoming the "J. Gander Hooter" later on).
From the files, we know she is a she, which rules out exactly HALF of Equestria. She's an Earth pony, which rules out two-thirds of the other half of Equestria. From this chapter alone, we can guess she is NOT an adult version of one of the Cutie Mark Crusaders (though she could definitely give Scootaloo competition in the fangirl department). She is also a Friendship School student from the same class as the Young Six, so, if this is set ten years after Twilight became supreme ruler, but ten years BEFORE "the Last Problem", that would put her in her late-20s at the oldest. And, that's really ALL we know about her so far. Which is the point.
Anyway, on to the next chapter.
REALLY good job on the action in this chapter. Yeah, the new Mare Do Well did a pretty good job against those three thugs. Starting out small on the first day is a pretty good idea for this line of work. And loved the references to what she learned from Applejack.
Excellent job on this chapter. As was mentioned by other reviewers, it is great seeing the nods to the series worked in as actual newspaper articles. And, yeah, I can sympathize with the bad luck on the job hunt. I particularly liked the mention of Sunset Shimmer in the human universe.
On to the next chapter.
Really good job on the action, exchange, characterizations and future chapter set-up in this one. Yeah, loved the new Mare Do Well leading the Blue Rhino away from the city and luring it into a position where Rainbow and the Wonderbolts could finish the job. Yeah, she actually caused a blackout in the process, but at least Rainbow gave some helpful advice. I guess "the Blue Rhino" has the potential to be a loose analogue to Megavolt (or an inspiration to a mad scientist who steals the Blue Rhino's strength and electrical powers, but at the cost of what was left of his/her sanity).
Now, on to the next chapter.
LOVED how the new Mare-Do-Well (in her as-yet-unrevealed civilian identity) met Sunny Skies and Petunia Petals and found a home for the time being. I hope she manages to find a day job (even though we KNOW it won't be easy). And, yeah, that nightmare at the beginning was some rather nerve-racking (in the right way) foreshadowing.
Now, we need analogues to Launchpad and Gosalyn. But that's probably coming up in the next chapter anyway.
REALLY looking forward to the next chapter (ESPECIALLY since it will be the new Mare Do Well's first fight with an actual super-villain rather than street punks or a wild magical beast).
Yes I still remember it. And am still enjoying it. I can't wait to see what else you do with this and your other fics
Hey there. Thanks very much for getting this next chapter up. Really good job on the exchanges, characterizations and future chapter set-up.
And, yeah, can definitely see your point about the mask in the author's notes, especially with the point-out concerning Spider-Man. Definitely good to see the new Mare-Do-Well in her still-unrevealed civilian identity getting to know some of her new neighbors AND meeting Muffins for the first time.
Very certainly looking forward to more of this.
Yeah who knows how many more the Sonic Rainboom actually affected. I mean six individual ponies were brought together on the path to friendship because of that. But who's to say more have seen it and became affected by it in their own ways
Great job on this latest chapter. Really appreciated the new Mare-Do-Well's reflection on finding out about Rainbow's first Sonic Rainboom. Yeah, definitely showed that the event could inspire others beyond just the Mane Six themselves.
Cool story. Added to my read list.