After being charged with assault, young Gusty Breeze is released into the care of an estranged aunt. The last thing she wants is to get in trouble again. Unfortunately for her, circumstances have other plans.
When a secret of hers is discovered, she's forced into a partnership with two other young ne'er-do-wells in order to stop all three of them from getting in serious trouble.
What starts as a simple club based around necessity and a stolen book soon becomes something else, and Gusty finds that she isn't the only one in town with secrets.
Cover is by KlaraPL on DeviantArt.
https://www.deviantart.com/klarapl/art/The-Hero-Club-786346283
Chapters (6)
A great start to what I’m sure will be a great story
I’m incredibly curious what happens when a rule is broken, that was quite ominous... Also very curious to learn more about this Hero Book. Loving the dynamic between Gusty, Boomer, and Snake; so far Snake’s my favorite 
Wow. This is so tracked!
Awesome start so far! I really like how you set up the characters and the world around them, easing us into it little by little so the OC-centric nature of it all isn't so jarring. Even so, not everything is explained and you've left some pretty tantalizing questions open to explore later, like what exactly happened to get Gusty in this predicament, what Daffodil's history with this kind of thing is, and how it all relates to this "Hero Book."
As far as characters go, Gusty, Boomer, and Snake have a pretty solid trio dynamic going for them. It helps that Gusty isn't 100% comfortable with them yet or vice versa because that gives them something to work towards. Gusty didn't seem too interesting at first, but that quickly changed the more that was revealed about her, Boomer is helpful and hilarious, and I have to agree that Snake is probably my favorite so far, with her completely flippant attitude towards just about everything and the fact that she's introduced by robbing the main character! Don't see that very often.
Daffodil strikes this odd balance between caring and threatening and there's definitely more going on with her than she's letting on, and while they may not play much of a role, I have to give honorable mention to Tall, Dark, and Gruesome just for the creative theme naming. 
Anyway, good foundations laid in this first chapter and looking forward to seeing where it goes from here.
It's great to learn more about these three, especially Snake Eyes. I do have a hard time morally justifying her actions even in the circumstances, but I love that all three of them have their own things that make them unlikely candidates for being heroes.
Also I hope you know I'm shipping your OCs and will not hesitate to try and get you to do the same
There we go! Lots of delicious character development for our main trio, but especially Snake, or should I say Cookie Cream?
This is a morally complex issue to be sure, but I do appreciate that she at least has more of a reason than just stealing for shits and giggles, and even makes an effort not to hurt other ponies in the process. It doesn't exactly justify her actions, but it does show that her heart is in the right place.
As for Gusty herself, it's good to finally get some background on what this book of hers entails and why she values it so much. As expected, it still doesn't explain everything, but there is now a clearer foundation for why she acts the way she does. Which is good because it looks like she's going to need to shape up into a hero herself. At least she's starting fairly small, with some local blackmailer, and not some evil demon beast or something. Though I suppose "Nopony" could technically be both.
Of the three of them, Boomer is probably the least fleshed out now, but it's only a matter of time until that changes. Clearly, she is VERY close friends with Snake though, enough that she can fully support her stealing habits and almost takes offense at the idea that she's in the wrong. Now that is true commitment.
Things are really heating up now that the main plot seems to have reared its head. Looking forward to seeing things pick up from here.
Here is your Review: My little Reviews & Feedback
oh.
9597778
Is something wrong? Gets me a bit nervous when a comment just reads "Oh."
And the mystery deepens! Just like any good detective story, it's all about finding clues and going down a list of suspects. Some very curious names on that list, once again highlighting how this seems to be a city straight out of a comic book with how nonchalant everypony is with supervillains casually robbing a bank to avoid the wait times. It's just what they do. Amber seems interesting as well and I hope we get to see more of her in the future. Her ability begs for further exploration.
Lastly, that chase scene was awesome!
Tense, with a good pace and a few scenery changes. Even though it was obvious Nopony would escape, (it can't be THAT easy) there were just enough close calls that it didn't seem quite so certain a couple times. Nevertheless, this failure looks like it's going to weigh heavily on Gusty, and now Nopony is well aware that they're after them. Our fledging heroes better watch their backs. 
9684726
4-5k is the word count I've been shooting for recently. I got similar advice from one of the editors of chapter 2.
I am more of a villian type
9684754
9684754
I gave it a like and tracked it. I've got a ton of stuff on my reading list I've been asked to look at, but I'll definitely look at yours. ^^
Great story so far pilgrim
9684880
Thanks so much! ^^
9684979
No problem
Your post has been noticed and you story shall be read.
Be it good, I shall comment upon this very page my thoughts and feelings.
Tally ho, upwards and onwards and so on.
9686539
Thank you! I hope you enjoy it! ^^
Here is the review you asked for at My little Reviews & Feedback
Paying off is only a short term solution anyway.
Glad to see our gang is hanging in there. Those healing potions really do the job. Better yet, they're making some real progress in the Nopony investigation. I love how polite and eloquent their letters are, by the way. Especially the one for Gusty. "I am aware this letter likely finds you in poor health, and that is unfortunate."
Hard to tell if that's genuine friendliness or not, adding to their mysterious air.
Looks like Amber is along for the ride now, even if she's not on the cover art. And we get to see more of the dynamics around Daffodil's estate. Unsurprising that Snake Eyes is not on good terms with the servant staff. More surprising that her nickname for Boomer comes from her literally cuddling her when she needs a shoulder to cry on. That is so endearing and I want to hug her too now!
Pretty ballsy of them to break into the school, but desperate times call for desperate measures. And with Pepper onto them now, times are getting more desperate than ever. Excited to see how this all turns out!
Well, this was a lovely piece! A nice storyline, excellent execution.. and it was entertaining to read. Was worth the read for sure, and I'll keep this in mind when anyone asks for a recommendation. Great work!
9836878
Thanks so much! I'm glad you liked it. ^^
Well said...
This... this is beautiful.
This is a surprisingly good fanfic. I had a great time reading it. The characters were great and so was the mystery.
9967297
Thanks so much! Like I said in the AN, there's plenty more to come. I had been planning this for 4 years before I even started chapter 1.
Mind if I ask who your favorite character is so far? Feel free to say no. I'm just curious.
9967431
The long planning shows. It feels like it could be it's own show.
As for my favourite chapter... Hard to say as all the good moments and character building was spread out across all chapters so far, but if I absolutely had to pick a favourite I'd say that Nopony's Home would be it as I felt that it capped off this first arc of pretty well and gave a good reason for the three fillies to form the club, although this choice might just be due to the fact that I was pretty well invested at this point, which was mostly due to the previous chapters so take my pick with a grain of salt.
(You know, now that I'm technically your co-author on this, I feel a little self-conscious posting reviews for it, but I know you like them and this whole thing was still 99% your ideas anyway, so no worries, they're not going anywhere.
)
Naturally, I already knew that Wonderbread was the true Nopony, but I still really liked how that was executed. I would normally be concerned about making Pepper Spray a red herring, since I don't think that's terribly hard to figure out, but making the actual reveal in the very next chapter to conclude the arc mitigates that. Plus, it sheds light on why she had all of those compromising photos in the first place, which is less obvious. It's very interesting how well this all came together, with that random pony who got injured in the first chapter being the indirect cause of all this mayhem. I can't imagine Nutshell's going to be too pleased with what his dad's been up to, but I hope he and Pepper can manage. She's a surprisingly good mother.
As for the chase itself, I particularly love the twist of Gusty going rage mode again halfway through and chasing both of them (and yeeting Snake through the window too
). Behind the Nopony persona, Wonderbread isn't particularly threatening as a villain, so Gusty's turn there immediately made the situation a lot more dangerous than it would have been otherwise. Still pretty ballsy of him to call her out like that on the roof, not that he had many other options.
So this is how the titular Hero Club began, by an unexpected aversion of "Hero Insurance" and the gang being slapped with a bill for all the damages they caused. I guess Coltsburg has enough problems with superheroes/villains causing property damage that they take it pretty seriously. Paying that off seems just as good a reason as any, and I can't wait to see what other adventures the future holds in store for these three.
If the main OCs in this story were voiced, what would they sound like?
10101555
I've got their voices in my head, but I wouldn't know how to describe them. Plus, I like to let people come up with what they think the characters sound like. Thank you for your interest. ^^
I somehow missed this chapter.
I'm happy to see this finally updated and as great as ever. The characters were well-written and the story itself still feels like it could be its own series. You did a good job at making me despise Ms. Drizzle in a very short period of time and I was quite surprised by how dark certain scenes got. I hope to see more soon!
I love how anticlimactically such a pathetic women was dealt with.
I actually feel kinda bad for her. Hopefully she can turn herself around like Snake did.
I love how thats her first thought.
I take that she's the disciplinarian of the family?
10419103
Thank you for your comment! The gap between this chapter and the next hopefully won't be as long as the one I just went through. I'm glad you enjoyed it. ^^
As for what Gusty's mom is like... well, you'll have to find out next chapter.
A lot going on in this chapter for sure, and a good thing too after the long wait. After the first arc was mainly focused on establishing the main characters and the setting, now we get to see the titular Hero Club get formed. Legally, as it figures Coltsburg would have procedures for this sort of thing (albeit not terribly difficult procedures). It could have ended with that, but actually getting to see them take on some jobs added a little extra flavor, especially knowing that they featured other people's OC's. While they had a bit of trouble, it seems they're having a fairly good start so far.
But lest things get too easy, we already have a new villain in the works, using the tried-and-true method of disposing of the old villain to immediately establish herself as a threat. And perhaps even worse, Gusty's mom is in town. This could all go terribly wrong very fast.
Hello there! Quite a while ago, you submitted this story to be reviewed by the Pens and Couches Review Group. This group has since undergone some changes and rebranding, and we finally reviewed your story! Check out your review here!