Of All the Nerf!!!

by RebelNarrator45

Epilogue

"Ahem! Attention please!"

All eyes went to Dash. Everypony was relaxing after the hard battle. The princesses were also present, and still amused.

"Everypony has been dealt with but one." Dash went on. "Captain Glimmer! Bring forth Commander Pinkie!" Starlight calmly levitated the giggling pony to stand in front of Dash.

"Hey, Dashie!" Pinkie said gleefully. "Great battle, huh? Can we do it again? Ooh! Can I be in your army again?"

"Next time you're on whatever army I'm not in charge of." Dash said. Then she shook her head. "But that's not why you're here now. Commander Pinkie, you are charged with disobeying a direct order and insubordination. How do you plead?" Pinkie though about it. Then she acted.

"Please don't be mad, Dashie! Please? I'm sorry if I made you unhappy at me! I'm pleading with you, don't be mad!" She brightened. "How's that for pleading?"

Everypony was trying not to laugh. Dash looked ready to snap. She took a deep breath.

"I mean," she said."Are you guilty or are you not?"

"Not what?"

"Guilty."

"Dashie, what did you do?!"

"What? Me?? Huh??"

"You said you were guilty!!"

"Not me, you!"

"You what?"

"No, not you! I mean, yes you! You are!"

"I'm what?"

"Guilty!"

"Oh, Dashie, don't yell. I'm sure you weren't that bad."

"Not me, Pinkie! You! You're guilty!!"

"No, I'm not. I'm Pinkie."

Dash stood there, red faced, puffing. This was not how she meant this to go!! Everypony was in fits of laughter by now.

"Pinkie Pie, you are guilty! You wore your cupcake hat after I said not to!"

"Of course, silly!"

"Then you confess! You did it!"

"Did what?"

"Pinkie Pie. Did I not tell you to lose the hat?"

"Yes, you did."

"And did you?"

"Nope!"

"Then you are guilty of disobeying my order!"

"Ohhhhhhhh! Ok. Yep. I did it. I'm guilty."

"Finally!" Dash muttered, while everypony laughed. "Pinkie Pie, as punishment for your disobedience, I order you to be executed by your own party canon."

"Ooh, goody! Can Cupcake be executed too??" Pinkie said excitedly.

"Sure, why not?" Dash said. Pinkie giggled.

Starlight, shaking with laughter, barely managed to nudge Pinkie up to the short wall built of stacked haybales. Pinkie grinned. Dash motioned, and Spike rolled the canon over, getting it into position.

"Wait!" Pinkie yelled. Dash arched an eyebrow. "I don't think Cupcake deserves this." Pinkie held out her hat. "He didn't disobey an order. I did. Dashie? Will you pardon Cupcake?"

Dash threw up her hooves in exasperation.

"Fine! Cupcake is pardoned!" Pinkie handed the hat to Starlight. "Now, ready!"

Pinkie stood tall, blue eyes locked on her party canon. "I love you all." She announced. "You too, Dashie. Even if you are shooting me with my own canon."

Dash sighed. She gave the order and Spike yanked the cord. The canon went off, covering Pinkie Pie in whipped cream and frosting. Dash grinned widely.

'Ah, sweet, sweet justice!' She thought smugly.

Pinkie sprawled on the ground for just a minute before bounding up and laughing gleefully as she licked the sticky combo off her muzzle. She soon had herself tidy again and joined her friends.

"So you're not upset that you were assassinated?" Twilight asked the princesses.

"Not at all." Celestia said with a smile. "It was quite enjoyable. And then we watched the rest of the war and decided who we believed would win."

"Well, I'm glad we saved Ponyville." Dash said. "But that war was exhausting."

"Tell me about it!" Starlight said. "I used that knock out spell so much I think it gave me a headache!" Everypony laughed. The war certainly had been tiring. But oh, so much fun!!

"Next time, you be the ones out to get Ponyville." Twilight said. "And maybe your plan of attack will be better than mine. I don't know how that last plan failed." She sighed.

"We gave it our best, sugarcube." Applejack said.

"That you did." Dash agreed. "I have never had such wonderful enemies. And yeah, we'll totally be the rebels next time. Once everypony recovers from this time."

"Yes, please." Rarity spoke up.

"And perhaps next time my sister will root for your side." Luna said to Twilight.

"That would be so great! Wait....what??" Twilight blinked. "What do you mean? Princess Celestia, were you against me???"
Celestia stared hard at Luna.

"I'm sorry, Twilight."

"Well, this is certainly encouraging." Twilight sighed. "My former teacher against me."

"Luna." Celestia did not attempt to mask her annoyance. Luna flinched as everypony looked on curiously.

"Yes, sister?"

"Do you remember our chat on the hill?"

"Yes...?"

"You told Twilight."

"Yes."

"Luna."

"Uh huh?"

"There is about to be another war."

"No. Tia, please. I'm sorry."

"Oh, you will be. Pinkie Pie?"

"Yeppers!" Pinkie piped up.

"You are my tickle torture teacher. Will you assist me? My sister requires it."

"Yes Ma'am, Princess Celestia, Ma'am!" Pinkie saluted. Luna uttered a shriek and tried to flee, only to be pounced on by Celestia.

"Sister, no!" Luna wailed, as Celestia put her hoof on the younger's side. "I am sorry! No tickling, please!"

"Sorry, Luna. You asked for it."

Celestia started tickling. Mercilessly. In front of the entire town of Ponyville. Pinkie giggled and trotted over to oversee the proceedings.

"Ooh...hahaha...Tia, stop....heehee....hahahaha....no....gah!...hahahahaheeheehaha!! Stop!!" But Celestia showed no signs of stopping. She grinned up at Pinkie.

"How am I doing?"

"You're doing okie dokie lokie!" Pinkie replied giggling. "But, you know, you can really get her if you use both hooves!"

Celestia grinned and started tickling both of Luna's sides at once. Her sister responded by howling louder with laughter.

The other ponies looked at each other in a mix of amusement and suprise. Twilight sat slack jawed. She'd never seen such behaviour from the princesses before!

"Well," Dash said with a grin,"I guess we know never to mess with Celestia. She's as bad a tickle torturer as Pinkie!" She shuddered.

"Eeyup." Applejack said.

Ignoring the shrieks of laughter from Luna, Dash looked at the farmer.

"So...about Pinkie Pie."

"Yeah...?" Applejack said suspiciously.

"Can you please take her on your side next time?! She nearly drove me completely nuts!!"

Applejack stared at her, mirth evident in her eyes.

"Suppose Ah say no?" She asked.

Dash met her gaze squarely. Her voice held alot of desperation.

"Then I'm gonna save myself some agony and have somepony kill me before the war even starts!!!"

"That bad, huh?"

"Worse!!"

"Well, alright. Can't have ya sacrificin' yourself before the war breaks out, so Ah'll take her."

"AJ, you are a life saver."

"Ah know, Dash. Tell me something Ah don't know."

Dash sighed in relief. Then she glanced at Pinkie, who was still telling Celestia how to properly tickle her sister. She shook her head and sighed.

'Oh, AJ. I'm sorry for what I just got you to agree to!'

She snickered.

'But not too sorry!"

Comments

[superfun]

I was honestly expecting Luna to sing to Twilight about Celestia betting against her.

[Banana Prince]

*Everyone shoots each other with foam darts.*
*Starlight is apparently knocking people out for real.*

It was a fun ride all things considered.