A bored delinquent and an exiled prodigy. When a MyStable profile called Anon-A-Miss sabotages all of Sunset's hard work and leaves her friendless except for a chance encounter, will she come back from it?
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RD what the fuck
Limestone what the fuck
CHS what the fuck
Sci-Twi don't you fuck this up
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9126090
This chapter had a lotta 'fuck' in it.
I know from bitter experience that our emotions can drive us to do some pretty shity things, but still what the hell Rainbow
9126090
Sci-Twi: Imma fuck it up
Tensions with the Rainbooms seem to be coming down at a decent pace. Everyone trying to accost Sunset at once was written well but the high speed chasing through the halls, I feel isn't as believable IMO. Possible, definitely but you'd think the threat of physical harm would act as at least a minor deterrent for the time being.
I don't think Pinkie should of apologize to Limestone, what she said there no excuse!
I hope Maude tears into Lime stone and points out Sunset may of hurt Pinkie, but she went all out to try and make up for it, as she Genuinely felt bad about it.
also nice bit with Scor, i love it.I expected him to be gloating or so, but he did regret what happened, that was nice bit. I'm glad she forgave him...sighs now if he can forgive himself...that another thing.
I like Sunset if maybe she announces how she feels tot he rest fo the school, on how with score was different, and how much they sound Hypocritical trying to ask for forgiveness after how they treated her.
The reason simple how they all sent in secrets on each other and then blame the person they thought was posting it, Even if wasn't her, doesn;t change the fact they willingly sent in secrets.
nobody held a gun or threaten them they did it willingly and gleefully on their own!
9126227
Thing is, she wasn't even going that quickly, Gilda couldn't because wheelchairs really aren't built for it. Normal ones aren't anyway, obviously some models like those used by Special Olympics athletes are different. I think it might have just felt fast because it was frantic.
I loved the part with cranky that was so heart warming.
Well... I... I never expected Sunset to cope well when she went back, but... jeez, didn't expect that extreme.
I believe my personal reaction is: what the actual fuck, CHS? What. The. Actual. FUCK?!
9126269
Sunset: I'm gonna go back to school!
School: Welcome to the thunderdome.
I did warn everyone that in act two I was gonna knuckle down and really get started on the pain.
9126292
You definitely did warn us. You did. And I still was surprised by how ruthless you were.
Seriously though, this is starting to go down to road of Sunset having suicidal thoughts. With Gilda around, I doubt it come to Sunset acting on those thoughts, but still...
More guilt for the school to carry! Let's see this devolve into a complete clusterfuck once more! Yaaaayyyyy!
9126243
I apologize I obviously wasn't clear. I didn't mean "high speed chasing" literally I was referring to the fact that they attempted to follow after her at all considering they were told she didn't want to speak to them and the potential consequences of their actions.
I understand they were feeling guilty but it's harder to talk when you're laid up in the nurses office
9126335
Ah, fair enough, I get what you mean now, although I will point out that people do have an unfortunate tendency to think that, even though something was just told to one person, that it obviously doesn't apply to them and then continue to bull forward anyway regardless of how clearly bad of an idea it is.
9126349
Yeah I guess that's true as well, but if someone starts "running away" from you asking to be left alone is your first reaction really to chase after them?
In any case it was still a good chapter, well done.
9126380
Poor decisions were made all around, lol.
Goddamnit, it Sunset, why must you be so forgiving...?
9126090
Exactly my thoughts every time shit went down. Like, FUCK! Does no one have any sense?
Ahem, anyway...great chapter! Absolutely loved this and I can't wait for more.
well if things weren't fucked up enough already.
Eh. RD will get over it. People get out of hand sometimes when they find some empathy and regain lost friendships. She's not the first or the last, but if/when Sunny finds out, it'll make things a bit more difficult.
9126635
Oh she'll get over it, Sunset getting over one of her ex-friends making a move on her girlfriend and emotional anchor? Ehhhhhhhh...
Well. Good to see that the universe is still out to make things a challenge emotionally and physically. It's kind of like "Hey, we're going to take away your friends and a good chunk of your independent mobility. But you'll get a girlfriend and a new crew to make up for that! EXCEPT, now we'll start undermining them to."
Welp there goes any progress between Sunset and Rainbow, not that there was much if at all to begin with but still.
Can't wait to see how this turns out!
"but now we’ve got to now, okay"
Were both of those "now"s supposed to be there?
"When I was kid I mean"
"When I was a kid I mean"?
"Twilight grumbled to their non-present friend before"
"Twilight grumbled to her non-present friend before"?
"over to the machine and grab at the readings"
"over to the machine and grabbed at the readings"?
"she remembered the first few reading in the Fall"
"she remembered the first few readings in the Fall"?
"Twilight’s eyes widened as spun around and grabbed"
"Twilight’s eyes widened as she spun around and grabbed"?
"that old analog antenna you had your closet"
"that old analog antenna you had in your closet"?
"Gilda asked, smiling wryly as reached out and took"
"Gilda asked, smiling wryly as she reached out and took"?
"a time’ll ever come when I ain’t in love you, savvy?"
"a time’ll ever come when I ain’t in love with you, savvy?"?
"She was like bowstring pulled fully taut"
"She was like a bowstring pulled fully taut"?
"faded and she looked up Gilda gratefully who"
"faded and she looked up at Gilda gratefully who"?
"up and leaning down and start unbuckling Sunset’s chair"
"up and leaning down to start unbuckling Sunset’s chair"?
"eyes fixed determinedly on non-existent point directly"
"eyes fixed determinedly on a non-existent point directly"?
"in front of her as pulled her gloves back on"
"in front of her as she pulled her gloves back on"?
"staring up at tiredly at the blank gray"
"staring up tiredly at the blank gray"?
"a moment later as started pushed her up the"
"a moment later and started to push her up the"?
"Gilda wanted to her see something"
"Gilda wanted her to see something"?
"way when they passed on the hall"
"way when they passed in the hall"?
"I justed wanted to apologise!"
"I just wanted to apologise!"?
"Gilda said in low, deadly voice."
"Gilda said in a low, deadly voice."?
"a moment to considering the cost-to-benefit"
"a moment to consider the cost-to-benefit"?
"and loud against the nearby locked, drawing"
"and loud against the nearby lockers, drawing"?
"“Sunset! C’mon, we just wanna talk!” Another student advanced from one end."
...These students, they are, uh, really not the best at threat recognition.
"doing an admirable job to breaking everything"
"doing an admirable job of breaking everything"?
"flanking her most of students quickly got out"
"flanking her most of the students quickly got out"?
"white scrubs were a sigh few students hadn’t seen at"
"white scrubs were a sight few students hadn’t seen at"?
"tucked them around Sunset legs up to her chest"
"tucked them around Sunset's legs up to her chest"?
"Turning to leave, Nurse Manners reached out and put a steadying hand on Gilda’s shoulder."
"Gilda turned to leave, but Nurse Manners reached out and put a steadying hand on her shoulder."?
"said, breathing out a sigh shrugging"
"said, breathing out a sigh and shrugging"?
"Nure Manners listened closely"
"Nurse Manners listened closely"?
"where Sunset Shimmer was laying asleep"
"where Sunset Shimmer was lying asleep"?
"Manners gave Gilda wry smile"
"Manners gave Gilda a wry smile"?
"as she followed Luna out Manners’ office"
"as she followed Luna out of Manners’ office"?
Also, that "Manners'" may be a typo depending on the style you're using; it's fine if that's what it's supposed to be here, but I thought I'd point it out.
"Biting her lip, grimaced and looked"
"Biting her lip, she grimaced and looked"?
"his; hands were broad and dark and thick with calluses"
"his; his hands were broad and dark and thick with calluses"?
"as she realised Rainbow as shaking"
"as she realised Rainbow was shaking"?
"as she tried to wrench out whatever it was that was"
"as she tried to wrench whatever it was that was"?
"who ranted about friendship and then cut and run when"
"who ranted about friendship and then cut and ran when"?
"walking towards the and jerking a thumb towards"
"walking towards them and jerking a thumb towards"?
"scraping her hands over her lips against"
"scraping her hands over her lips again"?
"How was she gonna tell Sunset?"
Well, I don't think Sunset will be upset with you, Gilda. I mean, the "and then I punched her off her feet and angrily shouted at her" does rather suggest that Gilda's feelings aren't divided. But with Rainbow...
9126673
Yeah.
Good luck in the contest!
ok so this is where probaly my only criticism for the story comes from and really its personal oppinion really but the reactions of the students felt a little 'clunky'. it felt like they all reacted the same. its a difficult one because ive never bore witness to such a mass of people being guilty. i feel some may not even care to be forgiven for example and such. the behaviour feels to generalised and robotic. this may be to an exstenta reflexion of sunsets mindset to a degree mayby or something else but it unimersed me though breifly. except for this minor tidbit an allround brilliant chapter and this is still probaly the only reason why im still on this sight 😂
Jesus.... Glida just went through the emotional rollercoaster of a lifetime with every major conversation, she had... But dear lord, Dash was the most heartbreaking!
Can I punch Dash?
9130264
I mean Gilda already did but feel free
9130366
Sorry, I meant, can I punch Dash repeatedly until she stops twitching. I can sympathize with her to a small degree, and it may not've been known to everyone yet, but SHE JUST MADE A MOVE ON HER FORMER FRIEND'S FIANCEE!!! That makes her lower than dirt in my book. It's gonna take a LOT for her to redeem herself from that.
9130933
Oh Dash has only begun to fuck up
9130988
That... makes me both excited and worried for the future
God I hate catching up after binge reading amazing stories
Geez, Gil, 1006 much?
why did you say that no ones knows what you’re even talking about
Oh damn that was an unexpected turn. I’m kinda disappointed that it was only a punch lol.
9138871
kinda curious what you keep deleting
9147013
A comment asking about the next chapter but then I seen your recent blog post saying it’s gonna be on an wensday.
Unfortunattely, I too am a bit disappointed by the recent direction of the story. Was a bit more interested in the character interactions and struggles, than Gilda's old mysterious gang and past. I'll stick around to see how it all turns out though, as I do enjoy some parts of this fic a lot.
Woof. After having read Dead by Sunset and getting through this chapter, I can't tell if you have a strong dislike for Dash herself, or just in general like writing for her a certain way. As I say this, to clarify I'm definitely sympathetic/empathetic towards her, but I dont think that's your intention lol. I'm reading for Baconhorse of course, and I live for her interactions with others. Here's to hoping Dashie isnt just relegated physical/emotional punching bag. Regardless, keep it up! You have a compelling writing style!
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I actually like Dash, it's why I beat on her so much, lol. She's a very dynamic character so she feels very natural to write, plus she's emotional and brash making her great for igniting our driving conflict. I'm a writer, so the easiest way to tell if I like a character or not is if I torture them
9211301
Makes perfect sense! Yeah, Dash's impulsiveness and need to take action makes her a compelling read. I'll still hope for better for the girl, but expect shit to get worse before it gets better lol. Keep on keepin' on!
there for Sunset as it is.
You had in your closet.
Maud.
to say thanks.
Idk if wont is meant to be there or what.
her to see
That’s about it. Great story so far
there for Sunset as it is.
You had in your closet.
Maud.
to say thanks.
Idk if wont is meant to be there or what.
her to see
I should have definitely read the tags better. I got into this because I love the author's Dead by Sunlight story and saw they wrote some more Violent Sunset.
I totally see why Sunset crushes on Gilda, she's my type of girl too, but damn, this story is really gay. Like this is some seriously mushy stuff. Romance tag definitely coming in first. I'm looking forward to when Sunset gets her emotional strength back.
Don't get me wrong, I really like this but wow. This might be the most Romantic romance story I've ever read.
Old you would have done far worse, what you did was little more than a kneejerk reaction.
I can tell you this much when sunset finds out she is going to be pissed
Although it ended poorly, I am glad Sunset gave Score a realistic degree of kindness and acknowledgment that she screwed up similarly.