A bored delinquent and an exiled prodigy. When a MyStable profile called Anon-A-Miss sabotages all of Sunset's hard work and leaves her friendless except for a chance encounter, will she come back from it?
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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uh oh
well... shit.
Oh fuck... You weren't kidding about delving in Gilda's past here.
Still, nice to see AJ and Rarity, gaining a lick of sense and starting to piece things together.
What if Zelda isn't dead? Gilda said they couldn't find the body so that could mean she could be still alive.
Also whoever plans to harm Gilda......THEY FUCKED UP!
dam it dude why
Oh god, not a damn cliffhanger! Why would you do this to us?
9070338
Can I make a suggestion for next chapter? When the asshole who attacks Gilda and Sunset is taken down can his death be similar the the Mafia 3 worldwide trailer? It's the one where he's driving out to the bayou and feeds the guy to the gators. Maybe instead of that they drive him out to the Everfree and dump him in the frozen river? Or leave them to die by wolfs? That would be fucking sweet and it would maybe shed more light on Gildas past.
Just thinking out loud but if you think it could work my OC has a 69 Pontiac GTO that could work
Please?
9083278
9083202
9083042
I did say the gloves were coming off.
And leaving us at the cliffhanger.
9083216
Yeah, I was dead serious, things are gonna ramp up hard from here.
Ayy fack you. You can't do that. That's torture and torture is illegal. Illegal. I oughta call the fanfiction police.
Man though, the only complaint I've had so far is the damn savvy. It's used way too much for a word I've only ever heard a couple times in a single movie series.
9083522
Might be a local thing but as a general rule if it’s a part of your vocabulary then it becomes a word you use like a period. It’s a slang thing, I think but that’s been my experience with it. You probably just don’t live in a place where it’s common, but yeah, it is an actually used word, lol.
9083235
Or course she can still be alive. After all, she's always protected by this guy.
Obvious reference aside. I get the feeling things are gonna pretty crazy from here on out.
My sense is detecting relationship drama
9083546
Nah, i know it's a word, but sweet Christ. I don't even use fucking nearly this much and it's my go to flavor word. Just a minor complaint in a sea of good.
9083546
A bit like "Ay" being used as a question mark, right? I guess I get it from living close to Canada.
Everyone is Bi and rampant shipping in fics is something that I really shouldn't be irked about in a fandom in which that's the norm, but I'm personally not a huge fan of the left-field Rarijack. The scenes were good, the interactions were good, and I usually like the ship itself; but it just came in so suddenly and seemed so unnecessary that I couldn't really enjoy it.
On a separate note, You really ride that drama tag full tilt. I might need to find some fluff piece I can read after each chapter, otherwise all the tension I feel might do something to my heart.
Well, the cliff hanger was a thing. That'll be something to look forward to... Loving the new crew Sunset's building up around herself, and I like how you seem dedicated to fixing the Mane Five on the side.
...
You know, I was going to try to talk about how much I love the interactions between Sunset and the other five, and how both sides are healing in their own ways from the break, and why I love it so much, but my brain really isn't cooperating. Just know that I really enjoy the way this has developed thus far and look forward to the next update.
9083698
I guess I can understand that, I did try to hint at it during the mall scene with the Mane Five and Sunset busking in the arcades after meeting Helden and Penny, though. It was something I intended as a part of the growth of the storyline, in part to show Gilda's own growth by way of her part in getting them together, albeit grudgingly. Sorry it irked you though.
9083686
Yeah, basically. Certain words or sounds get turned into slang to the point that they're a part of a sentence almost.
9083740
I always intended on showing the Mane Five growing in their own way, reflecting on one another and on themselves. This story is ultimately about Sunset and Gilda though, so they're pretty much always gonna be in the background. But it's something that has to happen for Sunset's sake, if nothing else, y'know?
I thought the Rarijack I noticed in chapter 5's mall scenes was me being a delusional shipper, but I actually picked up on subtext for once. I'm kind of proud of myself. A pleasant surprise in an already lovely read.
9084105
Yup, that was there for a reason.
Just when I thought things would be OK.
9084252
What a fool you were.
From Glida encounter with AJ & Rarity to them emotionally breaking down & finally becoming a couple, to Sunset amazing performance with Penny & Octavia as well as discovering Adagio can still sing (kinda), all the way to Glida's own emotional breaking down & new depressing details about her past, this chapter had everything!
P.S. Damn your cliffhangers!
9084291
It'll be resolved next week, the chapter is already written, lol. So don't sweat it, plus there's a little something in that chapter for my Dead by Sunset readers.
9084296
Oooooo, a D.b.S. reference coming up? Me likey, but I am scare for things to come for the girls. I know you said the gloves are coming off & I have prepared myself, but still I am terrified.
9084287
I read an I-A-M story and thought everything would be fine...
I'm a fucking idiot
Fuuuck
Now I won't be able to sleep! XD
"shrugging glancing off to the side as"
"shrugging and glancing off to the side as"?
"“Everyone, okay?” Gilda asked leaning against"
"“Everyone okay?” Gilda asked, leaning against"?
"heard the to truck pull into the lot"
"heard the tow truck pull into the lot"?
"in her temper Gilda’s lashed a fist out"
"in her temper Gilda lashed a fist out"?
"abraded skin before grabbed some bandages from the locker"
"abraded skin before grabbing some bandages from the locker"?
"she turns on her heel and walked quickly out of the"
"She turned on her heel and walked quickly out of the"?
"Rarity says softly, her eyes tilted to stare at the gathering"
"Rarity said softly, her eyes tilted to stare at the gathering"?
"but know quite well how to keep secret, darling"
"but know quite well how to keep secrets, darling"?
"into Applejack loose, messy"
"into Applejack's loose, messy"?
"replied, then pulled her phone and opened up a group chat"
"replied, then pulled out her phone and opened up a group chat"?
"Ever since last night world had felt… disconnected."
"Ever since last night the world had felt… disconnected."?
"Sunset stared up at face that was both familiar and not"
"Sunset stared up at a face that was both familiar and not"?
"with platters of sushi or plates appetizers."
"with platters of sushi or plates of appetizers."?
"I’m tired to regretting things and I’m sick to death of running away!"
"I’m tired of regretting things and I’m sick to death of running away!"?
"drawing startled jerk of surprise from the girl."
"drawing a startled jerk of surprise from the girl."?
"at almost all times of day and bohemian environment was one that"
"at almost all times of day and the bohemian environment was one that"?
"She also relatively certain those none of those venerable"
"She was also relatively certain that none of those venerable"?
"Usually the arcades are a semi-chaotic cavalcade"
"Usually the arcades were a semi-chaotic cavalcade"?
"Sunset was the first start clapping and her applause"
"Sunset was the first to start clapping and her applause"?
"turning to regard teh Sirens fully."
"turning to regard the Sirens fully."?
"face into the hard edged palm of the gauntlet"
"face into the hard-edged palm of the gauntlet"?
re the chapter ending:
...What?! What was that? Who?
I was not expecting that sort of cliffhanger here. :D
9084417
As ever, your diligence and generosity for correcting my horsewords is appreciated, cheers
9084933
Thanks. :)
Man. You... dammit. I can't complain about cliffhangers, but you can be damn sure I'll click on the next chapter as soon as it materializes! Great job!
9086025
Everyone’s hung up on that cliffhanger. I mean, I get it, but the rest of the chapter was good too, I though, lol.
Fuck you for that dick move at the end. I can't wait for the next chapter but I want you to know I am going to be supremely freaking nettled about it. Thank you and you suck.
9088486
Lucky you didn't need to wait for the next chapter then
derpicdn.net/img/2015/10/12/1000713/large.png
Sorry, could not resist.
9220609
What is the stain on the hand meant to represent? Kinda don’t understand that line.
9505902
So that's a private reference from me to myself, mostly, that refers to a dead subplot I had intended to use but decided against. Once I'm done with Featherfall I'm going to do some 'Deleted Scenes' blog posts. Featherfall had a few... I guess you could call them 'mental drafts'. These were story aspects, scenes, subplots, and narrative directions that I abandoned for one reason or another; mostly because I deemed the subject matter to be too dark for Featherfall's 'not-darkfic' genre, and the stain she's referring to is one of those 'deleted scenes'.
Sunset saying "that's all I'm going to say about that" is literally me saying: I'm not going to tell that part of the story in-universe. But I will eventually reveal what it was.
Good story well writen too, but it's just not for me.
9581341
That’s fair enough, thanks for coming this far.
9506042
Can’t wait to see those deleted scenes/dropped subplots. Looks to me like Sunset has killed someone (intentionally or not) and was wondering about what happened with that line. Plus, I’m curious as what was considered too dark considering some of the things that made it in.
Ehehehehehehehehehehe...
Oh no...
Gilda's gonna Bird Up again