• Member Since 11th Sep, 2017
  • offline last seen 13 minutes ago

therandomone95


Just another brony from another country (Yes, that means I have difficulty writing stories in english)

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Spike is a teenage dragon that isn't accepted by society because of his past rampages on Ponyville, Apple Bloom now is a teenager who doesn't have a cutie mark yet, her friends have moved on from the CMC and the society of Equestria thinks that a mare without a cutie mark is something extremely weird, both bump into each other in a lonely night, and they decide to hang out, let's see where does this go...

Just an average one-shot spikebloom shipfic, still need to work on my grammar and orthography.

Tagged AU for obvious reasons.
Still horrible grammar and orthography that need to be fixed.
This story is NOT related to "I care about you."
In this story Spike has wings, even if he doesn't use them.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 8 )

Aww, this story was pretty sweet.

I mean, I didn't give the episode where Spike grew large much thought until now. But, you're right. Spike probably would be on the receiving end of some hatred for it. It reminds me of the X-Men, really. People who just want to be accepted, but never will because of fear and prejudice. I'm glad Twilight and the others didn't judge him for it as well. Makes it feel more real.

I feel for AppleBloom too. I may not have experience with it, but being the odd one out is just awful. especially when adults are looking and judging at her. Though, I'm not entirely sure why she felt so alone when she has her family and her friends. Heck, even Diamond Tiara is her friend, despite certain show events no longer being in canon.

By the way, you may want to add the Alternate Universe tag since, you know? AppleBloom has a cutie mark and all.

Still, it was pretty jerkish of Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo to ditch her for the contest like that. And not tell her until that point, but. Well, they still wanted to be her friend, so it isn't like her Luna nightmare came true or anything.

Still, distancing herself from her family probably didn't help the whole loneliness thing.

So, when they were heading to the centre of Ponyville, was it night time? Because I doubt they'd find an empty street in the centre of town. :P

Still, they met up and...well they spilled their hearts out to each other pretty quickly. I mean, they were probably dying to tell someone about their feelings by that point but. I don't know, I expected at least a couple of emotional barriers. I probably would've even saved all this talk for when they were at AppleBloom's place, in private. They could've just met up in the street. One of them could've suggested to hang out for a little, wanting to spend time together. They would go to Sugarcube corner, have fun and go to AB's place and that's when the feels happen.

But, this way works too, so it isn't much of a complaint, really. :derpytongue2:

Wow, the people of Ponyville need to get hobbies or something. Instead of just staring at a blank-flank and dragon. And running out of the building too? Something tells me that Mr and Mrs Cake were none too happy about that. :rainbowlaugh:

Still, their conversation was nice and Spike brought up some good points. It's nice of him to try and boost AB's self esteem. Though, AppleBloom didn't exactly return the favour. But, then again, telling him that ponies would stop being scared of him would be a flat out lie so, eh? I guess there wasn't much she could say.

The ending was nice and cute. I also liked that you didn't fall into the 'love trap' as I've taken to calling it. You know? Having two characters say 'I love you' to each other after, like, one date. This is the start of something new and it shows in the writing.

And yeah, I wasn't expecting any hokey pokey, because that'd probably ruin the mood of the story if done wrong. So yeah, glad you didn't do that either.

Anyway, I really enjoyed the story. It was a nice plot that took AppleBloom's canon insecurities and gave Spike one, and used it to give them some common ground. That made the romance feel natural, if a little fast, between the two. Though, that fast romance could be put down to loneliness so there's that.

As far as grammar and spelling, well my only real complaint is that there are a lot of run-on sentences. You need to put a couple of full stops in the paragraphs, otherwise the reader will get out of breath while reading. Like I did a couple of times. :derpytongue2:

So, all in all, another SpikeBloom fic for my favourite list! :pinkiehappy:

Keep on keepin' on!

What's orthography?

8866842
First of all, thank you for the review! now, let's get to the points:
1- AU tag was already put in, I mentioned it on the description of the story.
2- Sweets and Scoots went to the contest the day before their conversation, and when they wanted to talk about it with AB, she didn't listen, so it's not an entirely 'jerkish' move from their part.
3- AB stayed away from her family because she had issues with ponies with cutie marks, she didn't want to be the 'weird one'.
4- Yes, it was night time, or if you preffer it, it was past noon.
5- I think the Cakes would be pretty upset for losing half of their clients, but Spike is a dragon, so there's not much they can do :rainbowwild:

Anyway, thank you for the review again! maybe I'll write some more Spikebloom in the future, if you're interested in more stories of these two crazy children, then you can check the group I founded! It's got a lot of stories with the Spikebloom ship, now, leaving aside the spam...

Sorry if I made some mistakes here and there, I am sleepy and it's 10:55 in my country, so maybe I wrote some horrid things in this reply, I hope you understand...

Goodbye! :rainbowdetermined2: :twilightsmile:

Great, now I wanna see a sequel to glorious masterpiece! It was short, it was sweet, it had emotional destress, & it had love & I love it!

8867952
I don't know...

I never do sequels to my own stories, maybe I'll consider it if I see positive feedback on this story, but as for now, it will remain like this.

8868381
Ok, first of all:

:rainbowlaugh: :twilightsheepish::derpytongue2::rainbowlaugh:

Ok, now, I'm thinking about it, I may do it in a month ot two if all goes well for me, I just need time to think and to write.

8869220
Fair enough, I can wait for final decision :twilightsmile:

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