And Chaos Reigns
“Why can’t things ever float my way?!” Rainbow cried as she shook her hoof dramatically in the air. “Is there some omnipotent hoof writing out everything I say or do, and controls my life in every single possible way?” She then stopped, putting a hoof to her muzzle in thought. She then chuckled to herself softly. “Ha. That sounds like something Pinkie would say.”
Hanging limp on the cloud bed she had made, she looked down morosely at Ponyville. Applejack had just beat her at a competition, and that made Dash sulk like a crazy mare. Afterwards, nothing seemed to go well at all. Long story short, she burned her mouth alive with rainbow-pasted cupcakes (thanks Pinkie) after trying to cope with losing, crashed into Twilight and Rarity right after they left the spa (Rarity fainted), and destroyed a bird's nest by accident (Fluttershy was scary when she got mad).
All in all, things were not going her way today. It’s as if she had some bad mojo or something.
“I see you're having a bad day, Rainbow Dash,” a voice from behind her said. Flipping around on her cloud bed to see who it was, she fluttered her wings and began to hover.
“Discord!?”
“The one and only,” the draconequus said, taking a white bowl hat off which he somehow now wore along with a matching white suit and cane.
Calming down a bunch, Rainbow humphed and plopped onto her cloud bed once more. “What? Did you come here to make my day worse?” she grumbled.
“Oh, how I would love to! But that’s not why I’m here today. No siree!” he said. He then popped into existence in front of Rainbow and began to twirl his cane as he kicked his legs in and out.”I’m going on a vacation!”
“A what now?” Rainbow Dash asked, surprised.
“A vacation! Where you go away to some faraway place and-”
“I know what a vacation is!” Rainbow shouted, annoyed. “Why now?”
“Oh, I just thought being the Lord of Chaos and all was just a tad too much for me at the moment. That’s why I’m making you Chaos God for a day or two!”
“What?!” Rainbow cried, jumping off her cloud.
“Yes!” he exclaimed. He then snapped his fingers, causing a weird tingle to go through Rainbow’s body. “There’s only one rule you have to follow.” He began walking away on air. Turning his head around, he smirked. “Don’t hold it in.” With that, he vanished into thin air.
“What?!” Rainbow shouted, not knowing what to say. She then flew off her cloud to where she last saw Discord and growled. “DISCORD!” she shouted, and bolts of lightning appeared out of nowhere. Frightening her, she yelped and flew downward and away from where she had summoned lightning.
Wait… she thought. Flying lower to the ground, she looked at a dainty flower near the edge of the road and squinted her eyes. Pointing her hoof at it, she shouted, “LIGHTNING!...” But nothing happened.
In an attempt to try again, she threw both her forelegs and pointed them at the spot in the road, when…
BOOM!
An explosion knocked her back and she was thrown into the nearby shrubbery. Rubbing her forehead with a hoof as she sat up, one could see soot evident on her face. Her hair was blown back as if it was gelled, and she had a shocked look on her face. Taking to the air and slowly hovering over to where she had wanted the flower to be smited, she stare wide-eyed.
A crater now stood where a road once lay. Still flaming and debris everywhere. Rainbow Dash looked at her hooves. “Awha-some!” she whispered in awe. Testing something out, she clapped her hooves together twice, and the ground magically poofed back to it’s original state. Smirking, Rainbow stared at her hooves.
“A God, huh?”
“Mwahahahaha!” Rainbow laughed evily. She then smiled at the mare in front of her. “How was that Pinks?”
“Eh. It could’ve used a lot more pizazz.” Pinkie stated. She then began eating an ice cream cone that she had pulled from nowhere.
“Well, it’s the pizazz-iest I could make it, okay?” Rainbow murmured. She then clapped her hooves together, magically poofing up her own sundae which she began to eat.
“OH! How did you do that?” Pinkie asked.
“With chaos magic. Duh” Rainbow then threw her sundae behind her, where it blipped out of existence. “I still don’t understand how you can do things like that.”
“Well, it’s pretty easy! All you gotta do is believe, and-” Pinkie pulled a lawn chair and popcorn from nowhere, “-there you go!”
All of a sudden. Rainbow cried out in frustration. “Seriously?! It was that easy all along?” Pulling out a weather wand from her own pocket of impossibleness, she grumbled. “OF COURSE IT WAS!” she yelled, and it began to rain chocolate.
“Dashie, you have to release the chaos magic or it’s gonna take hold of you!” Pinkie cried out. The wind began to howl and Rainbow looked confused.
“What?” she sputtered, before everything exploded into neon colors.
“WhOa!” Rainbow exclaimed as it began to rain chocolate sideways.
“Oh, dis gon b gud!” Pinkie smiled as she began to float into the air along with everypony else. Irregardless of the situation, Pinkie set up her lawn chair in mid air and sat in it as she began to eat popcorn. “Let the chaos flow through you!” Pinkie shouted in a Palpatine-esque voice.
“I understood that reference!” Rainbow shouted, smiling herself.
“Rainbow! Pinkie Pie! Is that you?” a voice from below them called. Both of them looked down to see a still-grounded Twilight Sparkle.
“Yeah? Why?” they both said.
“We have to find the others! This can only be explained by Discord going rogue!”
“Chill, egghead! Relax! I’m the one causing all this.”
“WHAT?!” Twilight cried.
“Relax! Here, I’ll get you something to make you less tense.”
“Rainbow, I don’t need to be less tense! Everypony needs you to-” but Twilight was cut off by suddenly feeling like she was floating on a cloud. “Whoa.”
“Better?” Dash asked.
“Never been in my whole life, Rainbow!” Twilight smiled lazily, a glazed look on her eyes. “Is it bad that I see books with wings? Look at that one! It has rainbow feathers! Hehe…” Twilight began floating off the ground herself. She began to trot in mid-air, but it wasn’t taking her anywhere. As if she was a little filly without a care in the world, she began to giggle. “Woo! Hi, apple! I’m Twilight Sparkle!”
Smiling to herself, Rainbow began to snort and laugh. Pinkie, however, furrowed her brows.
“Did you just make Twilight high?” Pinkie asked.
“Eeyup!” Rainbow Dash continued to laugh.
“I don’t think that’s the best idea…”
“Why is that, Pinkie?”
Pinkie bit her lip and began to paddle away in a kayak she had summoned. “You’ll find out…” A bright purple light began to emanate from behind Rainbow. As she turned her head, Rainbow widened her eyes and gasped.
“...Crap,” Rainbow whispered. Twilight now blazed with purple fire, her mane and tail all spiked and pointy. Her eyes were white, and she still had a wide grin on her face.
“Uh, Twilight? You okay?”
Craning her neck to look at Rainbow, she kept smiling. “Never better, Rainbow Dash!”
“Uh-oh…” was all Rainbow said. She then flew away as fast as she could, but she knew it wouldn’t be enough.
“What in the hay is happening?!” Rainbow cried as she flew away from a crazed blazed Twilight Sparkle.
“What did ya do Rainbow?!” Applejack cried from below. For some reason, she now had wings.
“I dunno! I told Twilight to lighten up and made her high!”
“Everypony in Ponyville knows not to do that, Dash!” Applejack shouted, now running away from the purple alicorn.
“Did something happen involving Twilight and drugs when I was out of town?!” Rainbow panted, putting up a giant wall of bunnies as a shield.
“Yes, and it’s too long of a story to fit into a 2,000 word one-shot.”
“Seriously? We’re breaking the fourth wall at a time like this?”
“Well, what better time than now?” Applejack stated.
Suddenly, the wall of cute bunnies exploded into piles of fur and there floated a flaming Twilight Sparkle. “Found you!”
“Gwah!” Applejack stumbled backwards. “How do you use these darned wings, Rainbow? They just appeared on me when I saw Ponyville raining chocolate!”
“Just flap and fly!”
“Twilight Sparkle!” A voice from the tree orchards rang. All three heads turned to the source and found a mithril-clad Fluttershy with warpaint and a spear. “You will be punished for destroying all those cute innocent bunnies!”
“You will never defeat me! This isn’t even my final form!” Twilight chuckled darkly, and her purple fire burned into a crimson pink. She then laughed evilly.
“Then I will have to defeat you before then!” Fluttershy screamed, before plummeting forward. Her spear was aimed directly for Twilight.
“With that awful armour, you’re not!” Another voice rang. Applejack and Rainbow Dash’s shocked faces turned to a fabulously dressed Rarity who was holding a leash to Spike. A light blue aura then enveloped Fluttershy before her spear-tip pierced Twilight’s form. "It doesn't even match with your coat!" Both mares turned to look at Rarity and scowled.
“Stay out of this, drab queen!” they said in unison, and Twilight blasted Rarity with hell-fire. Luckily, Rarity put up a shield before this, and it only scorched Spike.
“You dare?!” Rarity shouted, and all hell broke loose.
In the distance, four figures sat on lawn chairs eating popcorn and watching the events unfold.
“I just hope Twilight doesn’t go too overboard this time,” Celestia remarked before stuffing her face with a hoof-ful of popcorn.
“It’s funny how I gave Rainbow only a part of my power, and it’s already turned the Mane Six against each other!”
“Except me!” Pinkie remarked, pulling out a camera from her mane and taking a snapshot. “This’ll go in my ‘Ponyville delves into chaos and nopony remembers it after’ scrapbook!”
“I’ll have a hard time removing this from their minds,” Luna grumbled, taking a sip of cider that they had salvaged before it all went down.
“Oh do lighten up, Luna. I know for a fact they’ll have no idea about what happened.” Discord put on some sunglasses as a miniature mushroom cloud came from Sweet Apple Acres. “The readers certainly have no idea what just happened.”
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Meh, its alright, the writting could be more refined so as to be clear which character is talking at the moment, but what i do like is how you imagine each scene and able to expressively depict it in the form of words. Congrats, you earn a like and a fav tag.
7539317
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I won't upvote it, but I won't downvote it either. It's kind of meh.
7539361
I wrote it on a whim... It's meant to be bad (I think)
7539399 No need to defend yourself. I won't judge you on one story that is just "okay". No worries, I was just trying to give my input, even though it isn't much.
7539406
Nononono, I must say I appreciate your input! It is my first hack at a comedy, and I don't really know how it turned out... So yeah.
(Be brutally honest: how comedic or bad was it? If you wouldn't mind, that is)
Son...
Rarity would never say "Not in that get up."
This isn't 3,000 words long.
This story was hilarious!
Huh, sounds like it would've been interesting.
I came because of the story picture
I stayed because of the description
I read the first chapter because some higher power I can't describe convinced me reading this was a must. Also, I think I just saw my Pinkie plushie move. By itself. Uh.
aaaa okay haha
Congrats on disassembling thousands of fics about pegasus magic!
KEEP WRITING! The writing itself could use some work but it's also very creative, like Prince Techiar said. It's an intriguing writing style.
I agree.
What the hell did I just read?
In all seriousness, it was a funny concept—if there even was an original concept—and the character interactions were amusing, but the writing itself could definitely use some work. If it was meant to be a crackfic of sorts, you did a decent job, since some of it was actually done fairly well. If not, well, then there's definitely some work that could've been done to make it more readable in a few ways.
I'm on the fence here. Definitely not deserving of a downvote, but I don't think I can upvote, either. Keep writing—you'll get better.
PS: Potential bad pun of the day— "And Chaos Reins"
7540158
*distant groaning from bad pun*
Well, yeah, it sort of was the first story of it's kind that I made... And as I always say, I love criticism! So thanks!
I also finished it last night without editing any of it really so... Heh
This was a great story!
7540268
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7540286 Haha!
That was crazy. I love it.
When you're rife with devistation, there's a simple explanation, you're a toy maker's creation, trapped inside a crystal ball.
And which ever way he tilts it, know that we must be resilient, we won't let them break our spirits as we sing our silly song.
Was that a monty python reference?
Am I the only one thinking of Bruce Almighty right now?
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How does one decipher such a story?
7540548
I don't know... Are you?
7540570
One does not know how to decipher such a story.
7540613 I mean, come on, a god takes a day off and gives the first person (or pony) they meet his powers??? It's pretty obvious.
7540661
Aw, come on. Why you gotta remove all the fun out of the premise?
(I watched Bruce Almighty right before getting this idea. It... didn't turn out as I thought it would.)
7540669 Woah woah, I'm not saying that's a bad thing, the fandom needed something like this .
7540797
I know right? And no, I'm not taking it as a bad thing.
When I searched for the same premise, I didn't find anything so I was like why not?
...
Da heck Ah jus read?
That being said, wow. Just wow. This was fun. I needed this.
Dude i think you just broke the 8th wall
Interesting. A few laughs here and there. Certainly worth a read.
7540922
The 8th wall?! Le gasp!
Love it, and hoping for a sequel! If you feel like it, that is. Because forcing yourself to write something never works.
7541729
Very true indeed! Don't worry, something's coming...
I liked the premise better than the story.
Seriously, read the title, saw the cover, read the description. I genuinely laughed.
But then, this was my expression while reading:
7541801
Thanks for your honesty! To be fair, this is my first attempt at comedy... And I was half asleep at the time I wrote this. It sort of just took a weird turn and you get what you see. Cheers for reading!
P.S. There seems to be nothing where you said your face looked like, unless your face was actually blank.
Hmm, half of the time I literally did not know what was Happening, but nice story.
7539407 Um, I can't remember it all very well, since I read it a couple nights ago and I was really tired, but I think I chuckled a bit at least.
7541807 It's short enough that the randomness isn't overdone. Though at this point I think you need to do a short one shot of what happened when Twilight got high because that sounds hilarious.
Hey, congrats on your first feature!
I love crud like this!
7543481
Thanks!
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I give it a solid meh. Too much random, not enough chaos.
7554552
Hence the random tag
I would have added this story to my favorites for just this one line, but you went above and beyond and made the entire story hilarious. Furthermore, you just obliterated the Fourth Wall, and that's always bonus points in my book.
Thanks for writing this. It made laugh.
7631846
Thanks! Have a Fluttershy!
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7542967
There's already a story where Twilight gets high (I think...let me go check...It has been a while, and for all I know, it's been removed from the site...)
I have reviewed this HERE.
O_O
WTF just happened...
Nothing like some chaos magic to spice up your day!