Horse's Theater (Epilogue)
It had been only a few days since the Civil War reenactment had ended. Ponies were no longer numb, the booming of cannons was no longer heard at night, and Equestria had gone back to work in an attempt to eliminate the on-year prediction of negative 8% GDP change due to a full twentieth of Equestria's labor force simply dropping off of the map for a month.
Twilight smiled in her seat. Even though Celestia had made her promise to not punish Spike, Twilight had him quite busy with a whole litany of extra chores, most of them involving the cleaning and reorganizing of the library, particularly the history section.
Spike, for his part, had quietly accepted Twilight's orders, with only the occasional mutter about "rising again".
Nonetheless, it was not a time to reminisce about the war, but a time to be happy. Twilight and her friends were sitting on the upper balcony of Ponyville's town hall, viewing a pleasant rendition of Our Equestrian Cousin put on by Ponyville's schoolfoals. They had come to support the Cutie Mark Crusaders, all of whom were in lead roles, and it appeared from the amount of ponies seated in the square that the performance was highly anticipated.
Little known to Twilight, however, a pony going by the name of Trixie Lulabooth was waiting just inside of Town Hall, preparing to strike.
Just as the play was reaching its comedic climax, Trixie Lulabooth slowly opened the doors and snuck towards Twilight and her friends, being careful not to wrinkle her gray suit or dislodge her false moustache.
The group of ponies launched into a raucous fit of laughter, giving the assailant just the opportunity she needed.
She slowly raised a single hoof, and...
SMACK!!!
Twilight rubbed the back of her head. "Ow!" she turned to face her aggressor. "Trixie!? What are you doing?"
"FREEDOM!" Trixie Lulabooth yelled, jumping over the railing.
Twilight and her friends rushed to the railing, looking down to see Trixie collapsed on the wooden stage below in the middle of a group of surprised and frightened schoolfoals.
Trixie slowly rose to her hooves, although she was clearly favoring one side, as if she had twisted a hoof. She looked up to face the balcony she had just jumped from. "Sic Semper Princessus!", she cried before making a pitiful, limping escape off of the stage.
"Umm..." Fluttershy began, "what just happened?"
Rainbow Dash leapt into action, hovering just beyond the railing. "Twilight," she called with fervor, "you want me to track her down and haul her back here?"
Twilight's face was blank. After a few moments, she responded slowly and without any emotion. "...No. I want you to track her down...trap her in a barn...and set the barn on fire."
Rainbow Dash saluted and without another word sped off after her prey.
"Not my barn, ya hear!?" Applejack called after Rainbow Dash.
Rainbow Dash was already far out of earshot.
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You... you just couldn't resist could you? You just HAAAD to do this.
Oh who am I kidding, this is the perfect little addendum to a hilariously strange story. Well done good sir.
Can't wait to see your take on WW1
...
I don't get it.
*re-reading*
Still don't get it.
*re-re-reading*
I give up. Can someone please explain, so I can ease my pain?
7234120
Twilight (Lincoln) was just assassinated at the play Our Equestrian(American) Cousin by Trixie Lulabooth (John Wilkes Booth).
Next chárter, AJ joins Spike 's army in revenge for having her barn burnt.
Oh that was brilliant.
Poor Trixie, burned alive in AJ's barn...
Too bad Starlight was with Spike, I'm sure she would have been one of Lulabooth's helpers.
Dat smack tho.
LOL
I hope Dash doesn't actually set her on fire. Because that'd be a bit of a dark turn.
Trixie wailed as Rainbow Dash carried her into a barn.
"No!" shouted Trixie, except Rainbow had already blocked off the door. Rainbow smiled a sad smile, before setting the entire barn of fire. Trixie was panicking, not only did she get trapped in a barn, but the barn was aflame. Minutes later, a shrill scream could be heard, before dying out.
Meep merp. I don't think I should access this side of my brain juuust yet.
7234603
that happened to booth irl lol
I want to see that sequel soon. Especially if Spike plays as Patton. It would be funnier if you made Twilight as Rommel so she can taste defeat.
7234610 this makes this piece specially brilliant XD A sequel is indeed sorely on demand!
7234610
7234841
Actually the barn was set on fire to smoke Booth out of said Barn so they could actually capture him (there were orders to take him alive) but one soldier wanted to avenge the fallen Lincoln and well shot Booth,
His last words? Useless, useless.
7234862 Then shouldn't rainbow first chase her into a barn, then set it on fire to try to make her get out, and THEN hit her?
OK, it wouldn't be as fun
but interesting to know, thanks 
7234862
ik I was speaking broadly
7234045 if he does one I'm guessing that the flim flam bros make the yellow death!
7234172 Oh! That makes sense! Nice one Trixie!
This needs a seccule secrule s s .... How do you say it ow well this needs one thow
I don't get it, both were violently bloody battles
7237303 True, but Fredericksburg was child's play compared to Sharpsburg- the bloodiest battle in US history.
I look forward to this. Maybe she'll even make him wear a saddle and ball ga...uh, I mean bridle.
That was fun
This was great. Oh, I loved all of this. So much.
Nicely done n_n I freely admit, being a Canadian, I don't know much about American history, but this was still very fun.
...Ya just can't take it that Spike was a hell of a better historical reenactor than you. I get that you wanted to stay to code, but it's boring as hell, and it reeks so much of "the Winners write the story". I loved how Spike turned that thing completely up on its head and made if fun as well as educational. Even if the same thing happened where the Rebels ultimately fell in defeat to the Royalists, I still have to give Spike a hell of a claw.
You need to make a sequel. But the sequel needs to be a bit more fleshed out. 10/10 would rewrite the civil war again.
This hits a little too close to my family, being a descendant of John Wilkes Booths' sister and all... guess everyone has a bad apple in their family at some point.
None of us ever liked him either!!!
The history nerd in me is so, so happy about this story. VERY well done.
7267897
Thank you so much!
Is Trixie unaware that the whole thing stopped or is she trying to start another revolution?
The next year, Trixie has to be Spike's mount
7281546
The confederates have a preset kill limit; if they reach it, they shut down.
Aaaaaaaaaaah...
John Wilkes Booth...
7256693
Hey, at least your not one of...ummm, how should I say it...1937 nationalist workers party leader's desendants
7290123 Yeah, that would've sucked. But Georgia really doesn't have that problem- mostly in the Carolinas, or so I've heard. We got a big airport, a Coca Cola factory, and a mountain made of solid granite. And not much else. So lucked out compared to the neighboring southern states. But Eliza M. Booth is kinda a family stain...
7296952
I do most of my commenting on mobile and so I hadn't seen your avatar until now.
Your bat pony cop is adorable. Is there a story behind that?
I...
Did I miss something?
Oh my gosh! I can't believe I didn't see that coming--of course it would be Lincoln's assassination! That's HILARIOUS!!!
Well, this was hilarious, and I really didn't expect the assassination.
7234603 7301722
I suppose it's a good thing that Trixie is a Magician, so escaping burning barns is kid stuff.
7301722 This chapter is referencing John Wilkes Booth's assassination of Abe Lincoln. Booth was eventually cornered in a barn. To save lives, the barn was lit on fire.
7523344
I remembered that shortly after I put the comment, but thanks!
I don't know if you knew this or not but in the scene where Aunt Celly and mum are having a picnic, during the early battles of the cival war there were rich people who just sat on hills and watched (they may or may not have brought lunch, too) also this reminded me of both the Diary if a wimpy kid movie when he's at the reenactment and messes everything up so bad he gets his dad banned from the reenactment club.
also if you did a ww1 story (Which I doubt because an accurute well thought representation of the horrors of modern war with pastel equines would work, just not well fitted for the general dragon dueologies comedic aspects) you should get a pony version of Indy Niedell somehow as like a cameo (I don't even know if there is one )
7849644 Yup, I did know they had picnics in real life, and that's why I wrote Celestia and Luna in there!
In terms of WW1, I'm not sure I'll write another sequel...but I did write one for WW2. How's that for colorful equines and the horrors of modern war?
7850773
I suppose it could work(possibly with a disclaimer about how horrible it was irl)
if you did a ww1 sequel (kind of hard because you've done ww2 already) some interesting scenes or ideas
A. pony indy niedell narates the broadcast from the zepplin
B. Cousin jerkhead (Prince Blueblood) as John French, mainly just because of his refusal to work with the french seems like jerkhead
C. Aj as Colenel Paul von lettow vorbbec (he is often pictured wearing a hat and also it just works )
D. Rainbow dash as The red barron (no explanation needed)
E. Fluttershy as eddith caval
F. Trixie as Rasputian ( he was a mystic)
sorry got a bit carried away
8162680 It means so much to me that you really loved this series- Thank you for your kind words. Would you like an early viewing of the new story when I'm finished?
8205312 Perhaps...but have you read the sequel yet?
8357669
You might like how the sequel ends, then ;)
The rise will South again!
I was reading this again the other day, and I realized- did anyone ever actually match up Fancy Pants and (my personal favorite general) J.E.B. Stuart? I assume you meant to connect them? I was rather disappointed he didn't get a bigger role since he was practically Stonewall's son, but hey, you can't have everything :P
Thanks again for writing this amazing piece of historical comedy!
8498426
He was indeed JEB Stuart, and I think one of the early comments matched him correctly!