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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Twilight.
Need opening quotation marks.
7438652 whoops, missed one. fixed.
I envisioned the narrator from Superfriends saying that when I read it.
This Blueblood is WAY more humble then what I'm used to seeing!?
In short, YES.
Also I am quite liking this story and am very glad that the nightmare cult was a laughable farce of a cult. Too often they are shown as a credible threat. Now we can get to some neat and original enemies. Like some random noble... well perhaps I should wait a bit more to see what he's all about. And giving Blueblood some character is always a good use of a subplot.
7438689 which was exactly what I wanted
Good job protecting Twi, Aeron.
I look forward to more of this, mate. Till next time.
As I read this, an ambulance went by my house. Or a cop car, my city has the second worst crime rate in state so it could be either one, really.
I guess writing a courtroom trial made you feel really peeved.
Hmmm, that minotaur has quite the vocals during his 'OBJECTION!'. Does it not remind anybeing of a certain human lawyer?
is this the sun version of the night cult? I just ask because it would be as random as last time.
uuuuuuhhhhhh... If I translated it right, and understand the situation the right way, then I'm not sure if I like it, and no I don't say it because of the possible thing that is suggested here. (Or at least what I think could be suggested.
didn`t they look like Ponys?, and wasn't he in an anthro form? Why do they all have fingers? I mean his.....(I don't want to look for the word) defending court guy, was a Griffon or something, and he himself was not in the Pony form, but his Human form. However, I was more or less sure he did used his Pony form lately.
awww, for a moment I really thought this would turn into comedy and another not needed cult would appear.
Sorry, but I guess for me it was the wrong moment to have an cult attack, or I somehow don't like it in "this" story.
...Did I really forgot that they maybe where anthros all the time? Because I get the feeling they are anthros.
I admit I skipped that part, I wasn't really interessted in this fight right now, and more about what happens in the story, or is talked between the attacks, however I think I somewhere know those characters. Which friends are Primrose and the other one again?
This chapter was good, but I don't know if you know the feeling yourself, that sometimes you feel like a story shouldn't have a certain element in it. However, some of your other parts, make it easy to forget the part that feel a bit wrong.
7438783
it depends on what you think it means.
No they are not anthro, there are no anthro's in this story. His lawyer is a Minotaur. Aeron is using a centaur as his current form. has been doing so for the last couple of chapters.
7438698 Have you begun writeing on the next chapter or are you taking a small break after this shitfest that is called 'Law'?
i like the prison. You can still talk and do something in there. With good behavior it can be quite enjoyable.
Wouldn't community service in the town guard to defend against wild animals be more of a punishment? I think being forced to risk life and limb is more severe than being locked up where you're safe. Maybe he could have been made to build homes, what with the 'wood bending' he has, he could make the wooden support frames without needing nails.
7438810 already working on the next chapter. I pretty much start the next chapter right away while my muse is cooperative.
that one was good i must admit
7438822 Any idea when it comes out?
S'good.
7438826 honestly not a clue. All I got so far is 5 paragraphs. plus a boatload of notes for future chapters. and a page or two of research.
Nice, though I find it confusing that no unicorn tried to distract their opponent with fancy weapon swinging while they were at same time propelling an unseen dagger into their opponent's back.
Their sword-fighting should be a little more like two sides using revolvers to shoot at each other.
At least I think so considering they are not actually physically holding their weapons.
Glad to see another great chapter.^^ Lots of proofreading errors though. And lots of questions written as normal sentences among them.
7438807 Not sure if you made it clear enough, I only understood him being something Pony related, and I think I never thought he was a centaur back when I actually had read them. Wouldn't it maybe have been better to use their form? Not sure it could also make them angry.
7438694 It's been made blatantly obvious that the changelings are involved. Willow Vine, and whoever master Poncho is, made this very clear. Unless Poncho had something else in mind when he asked her to bring the maid in for a snack...
Of course, underestimating the Forest Spirit that can pretty much drop said forest down on your head without a problem is almost guaranteed to violently blow up in the general's face.
The description of Aeron's form makes me think of a mix between the Botani and the Genesaur from World of Warcraft:
vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/forscherliga/images/9/92/Botani_BLZ_2014-10-21.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20141022081921
bnetcmsus-a.akamaihd.net/cms/gallery/INS60IWXZEEC1412811920359.jpg
Definitely not nearly as friendly as him, though.
derpicdn.net/img/2012/10/18/126301/full.png
Yay! Another chapter! Hope they come out faster. Like daily or something.
7438851 should say he help rebuild homes!
I couldn't find a clip of Prince John from Robin Hood: Men in Tights saying "the day started out so well", so have this instead:
Yet another story that was going so well as a mix of person vs. self and person vs. person social conflict until some unwanted drama queen of a villain came in and started stealing precious screen time because the author didn't properly understand what they had. Now the villain's conflict is slowly going to consume more and more of the plot until it becomes boring unless I pay someone to go through and cut out the thee quarters that are irrelevant to my interests. I am so sick and tired of this happening to promising stories!
The cultists were OK but pushing it, but this just goes too far.
I found that you handled the court case just fine! Just a thought though, since aeron is a floral creature, sixteen months shouldn't be too long for him. As a creature of plant like nature, he could just go into hibernation and wake up sixteen months later , some plants do it all the time.
I feel so bad for the guy, he saves Twilight, a very important pony and he doesn't get any slack? Give the guy a award or something for saving a element even. Anyway good chapter.
7439030 that would leave me no time to eat or sleep.
So the bad guys do something helpful. In a backhanded sort of manner but it did help clear out the cultists at least.
Can't imagine Aeron will do to well in a cell for sixteen months. Even as dark as the Everfree forest is most of the plants still need sunlight and I bet the same goes for him as well.
7439084
What is this 'Sleep' you speak of?
7439125
he could practice with his shapeshifting, make shadow puppets with his vines for the CMC when they visit?
learn to grow herbs and stuff for zecora?
A new chapter!?
1.bp.blogspot.com/-qiFrJtKExR8/U3lVekD7nBI/AAAAAAABx5A/J-zkeeF18M4/s1600/Rainbow_Dash_overwhelmed_with_joy_S4E22.png
If I was our protagonist, I'd try to set up a wireless body. Even if it's a stationary tree or whatever. It'd be useful considering he's stuck in a prison cell. He could use it as a little spy for him, or just listen into conversations above out of boredom.
Also, how's he getting his sunshine?
Not a bad story, and an interesting twist on the Human in Equestria story. Human character is charming, if a bit nebulously defined. I think his time spent with Zecora would have been a good time for a firmer introduction.
That said, tighter editing would make this a lot neater. The messier things get, the more likely I am to just skim the highlights.
Likewise with the sometimes excessive exposition; it's important to establish things ahead of time, but it's also important to make it feel like part of the story, rather than an author's aside.
Also, continuity is a bit weird. This obviously takes place before Season 2, but it's a bit unclear when. This story starts after Call of the Cutie (Episode 12) and later encompasses part of Show Stoppers (Episode 18), but also starts before Bridle Gossip (Episode 9).
7439160 The only thing I dislike most about being made of flesh is the fact that one has to sleep to stay relatively stable. By that I mean, no hallucinations, seizures, collapse from exhaustion, and other negative effects of not sleeping.
It's weird, but this story doesn't show up when I'm reading on my tablet. Not on my bookshelf, not even in a site-wide search. It'll say I have an unread chapter, but then say there are no stories recently updated on that shelf. Really weird.
So not cultists, just an evil mastermind controlling things from the shadows.
Nice chapter, good work.
In a separate note:
Quoting the most eloquent of apples. Eeyup
7439277 This story pretty much ignores the canon order of episodes because they make no sense. since winter wrap up happened before fall weather friends. that means the season went from winter to autumn, which is weird. So I'm taking artistic license and shuffling events around.
7439391 youre tablet might need you to turn on your mature setting from the tablet itself
7439452 This is true, and largely a non-issue, though there is some chronology to certain episodes.
It's a bit non-traditional, but as long as things don't get confused I shouldn't have any issues with it.
7439084 FUCK YES!!!!!! i missed this story and been waiting for a new chapter!!!! Good job man keep em coming. On a side note: damn thats a long while in the slammer, but as said it coulda been a hell of a lot worse. Hope he gets out on good behavior. XD
7439125
If I remember right from a description in an earlier chapter he does have access to a window.
Still, this is quite a turn away from how this story looked to be developing. Not that it is a bad thing, but I hope the bad guy is something that will stay mostly in the background till shit happens and then we move on. Had a really good fic that didn't need some villain to ham in conflict and drama. Just the characters interactions were doing plenty in that department. Still a good fic, just saying that you were doing spectacularly well without a forced drama maker. Then again this is Equestria and those do needlessly pop up randomly; see Sombra, Discord, Queen Chrysalis, Trixie amumulet version, and probably someone I don't know because I am not caught up on the show. Guess adding random villain in a mostly character interaction driven story is following the example of the base material of the show.
Not bad. The chapter could have ended at many an early spot making me angry for more. Instead it ended on a more satisfying note.
I hope he goes back to a more pony form when he is relaxed, just meshes better.
Also, does anyone else hear Keith David whenever Ironclad talks? You know; Anderson from Mass Effect, Chylds from the Thing? Mother Fluffin GOLIATH from Gargoyles?
Lastly, are you implying that Blueblood is gay? Not that it's a bad thing, but just wondering if that's the direction that is heading.
It is oh so awesome to hear Blueblood say this. Even if he was a jerk normally, seeing him actually fighting for himself and holding his ground would be awesome.
Not sure if he's a Changeling, Vampony, or just a pervert looking to get his jollies on. Either way, I would love to see Aeron shove a cactus up where the sun don't shine.
Would that something be a Gin and Tonic??? Or some good Whiskey??? I can also see it being Apple Family Cider, after all an Apple a Day keeps the Doctor away and it would be interesting to hear Blueblood praise her farm's products at the GGG and cause a stampede of nobles to her cart that makes her a nice tidy profit.
Very nice chapter, I'm actually rooting *heh, no pun intended* for Blueblood to find a nice mare. I can also totally see Twilight coming to visit Aeron with her friends... and maybe getting some shed leaves for analysis??? I can also see the Crusaders visiting with Zecora, that would be awesome.
I'm not sure it is wise for the general to make enemy of the Nightmare cult....
7438817 I think it was arranged by the big bad villain in the shadow.
7438957 I'm pretty sure the word centaur was used several times in chapters eleven and twelve. Celestia even gave her opinion of that form in ch.12.
7439452 I have no fear for I'm an utter fool and only such fear not Criticism.