• Member Since 17th May, 2012
  • offline last seen June 20th

unleashedtwilight


Ask-UnleashedTwilight.Tumblr.comAsk me anything!


E
Source

This FanFiction is pretty much based off of after “My Little Dashie” but this time the same problem happened a little differently… only to Twilight. So please enjoy the fanfic. P.S. it’s my first one so please don’t hate on me, or I will hate you.
Also Props to Sparknanator for the Pic.

Chapters (9)
Comments ( 139 )

This is rather interesting. I am interested to see where this goes.

Good Job! :yay:

Sieg Heil!

Not bad, but I do recommend that you separate the dialogue from the text from the three chapters and forward.

Doing that, this is acceptable, even though it is not original.

It's a very nice story so far, but I have a few suggestions:

I know it's supposed to be like My Little Dashie, but it's getting too close to it, so try and divert a little if you can.
You're rushing, the time is going by too quickly, slow down the story and add more details if you can.

These are just suggestions, so only if you want to.:fluttershysad:

Still an awesome story!:yay:

Make more......or I will kill you....I only have two complaints. The first is how you put it all into a big slur, instead of separating things, like when another character talks. The second? The chapters are too short...…

Niece: "It's Twilight from MLP: FiM!"
Twilight: "What?"
Nice: Explains everything.
Twilight: :twilightoops:

Yeah, sorry. This IS my first FanFic so... I'll get better at it in time.:pinkiehappy:

so much D'awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
MOAR MOAR DAMN IT I NEED MOAR

606809 607060
both of you shut up before il orbital strike you both

MOAR MOAR MOAR MOAR MOAR I NEED MOAR

607275 don't worry, I will add another chapter tomorrow

607314 but i made 2 chapters today... plus I need time for ideas to flow.

607332 They are kidding take as much time as you want I like it I hope you get better, and if you can I would like you to go back and separate the dialog more. It is just a suggestion so you don't have to.

607232 Please stop we are BRONIES not animals we hail from different countries so if one person says something don't just go rage at them. Love and Tolerate thee shit out of them instead.

I can't help but find this difficult to read, especially in comparison to My Little Dashie. This story lacks the same subtlety and finesse that MLD does.

I suppose it IS your first fic, but I don't think this will be making my favorites list.

Keep practicing. You have potential.

:rainbowderp:err, seems kinda possesive there:pinkiecrazy:

607483 woot go Sweden, im not Swedish but my close friend is

In my opinion, it's almost as good as 'My Little Dashie'. :twilightsmile:

607060 And you too! I don't want to see those comments here!

610756 STOP POSTING THOSE COMMENTS ON MY STORY!! SWEET CELESTIA, KEEP THAT TO YOURSELF, OR ARGUE SOMEWHERE ELSE!! :flutterrage:

Okay fine... I'm now gonna extend the time for the next upload. :ajbemused:

:twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2: IF YOU DON'T STOP THIS ARGUING, IM DELETING THIS WHOLE STORY!!!!!!!!:flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage:

610345 i agree with the owner of this writing, plz stop fighting you guys/girls (if you are) it would be best for him to know that he isnt being spammed notifications, that ppl are commenting on the vid, when it mostly doesnt have anyhting to do with it. For the sake of Brony kind: STOP QUARRELING. Dont you guys remember hearth's warming eve:
The fire of frinedship lives in our hearts, as long as we live we cannot.. drift apart. though quarrel arise, there numbers are few. laughter and singing will see us through (will see us through). We are a circle of pony friends, a circle of friends we'll be til the very end.
If you guys do remember this, then you should know where im going with this. So seriously stop :twilightangry2:

wow wow wow. :pinkiehappy:
this is so cool.
ceap going whit this

Alright... this is my last warning... if I see... one more stupid comment that has NOTHING TO DO with the story!... I'm not even going to continue with it, and I'm deleting it!!:flutterrage: And if I have to... I'm sorry for the fans who really appreciated my story...:pinkiesad2:

i love this story. it is realy good. i hope thet you ar going to make it realy long :pinkiehappy:
sorry for bed english :fluttercry:

next chapter in development and it is almost done.:twilightsmile:

D'AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
MANLY TEARS WERE SHED BY ME :raritycry:

i did begin to cry.
this story ar really good.
good job :twilightsmile:
this was so good :fluttercry:
god job good job

D'awww :fluttercry: I loved this chapter. It makes me wish that I had my own little pony to take care of. Especially if it's Derpy. :derpytongue2:

this chapter had so much D'awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww and so much :raritycry: :applecry: :pinkiesad2:

hmm this to me feels like a rushed my little dashie but.... that doesnt make it anyless Dawwwwwwwwww
but thanks to lack of sleep i cant realy feel anything right now though i will probably have an overload of daawwwwww when i remember this tomorow

:raritycry:WHY?! WHY SO DAWW?:raritydespair:
She's just overreacting. Don't worry.

Login or register to comment