Twilight is practising a new spell and Spike unintentionally breaks her concentration, and now has to deal with the consequences of this.
Chapters (1)
- Member Since 29th Oct, 2014
- offline last seen Nov 25th, 2023
Wonder
Sometimes I like to just sit down and do nothing. Alright fine, all the time.
Wonder
Joined 29th Oct, 2014 ·
Offline
Sequels1
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Wonder · 31k words · 76 10 · 2.5k views
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If only the mail box was a girl, then it would be the perfect match!
5674173
...way too many puns that I'm gonna have to the use.
5674259
Your going to let be The surprise.
5675941 Take what you want !
If spike could he would.
th09.deviantart.net/fs70/PRE/f/2015/050/9/3/spike_rarity_splash_by_hillbe-d8iq6be.jpg
SEQUEL!!!!!!
It should be Shouted.
The " isn't necessary there since it's not part of a dialogue.
Pike instead of Spike. You then repeat his name again and the comma isn't separated.
You're.
Arrived.
Don't you mean "Sworn?"
I think that you meant "Couldn't keep up" there.
Doomed and life.
Missed an "s" over there.
I thought Pinkie of all people would recognise me.
People?
The d in smiled shouldn't be there
The extra t, I think that it was originally "At"
Walked.
Dd. Did you want to write "Did"?
And, some commas which were either missing or extra.
Now that I got that out of the way, I think that the fic was good!
I enjoyed reading it but I won't add it to my favorites, not only because of... you know
And, sorry if I sounded rude with the corrections or if I wasn't clear
5800635
This is why I like you. Thanks for pointing out the mistakes.
But I cannot be forgiven for using the word 'people'. I am ashamed.
And I don't think helping people with their mistakes is rude. But is was a bit tricky to find the errors... until I remembers ctrl+F.
5790081
Don't worry, I already got a picture found for it s it's written in stone. There will be a sequel. Eventually. So make sure you follow me to find out when it is released.
5800996 That's why I used quotes, to make them easier to find
That mailbox tho'
... Wut.
Sorry, Spike. In order to spend time with Rarity you're going to have to first also give her things every time you come to meet with her.
Is this... actually complete? It says complete but the story doesn't seem concluded.
6225686
Mistakes were made.
And who said there wasn't going to be a sequel?
6225686
I fixed that part up a bit. Now it makes some sense. Some.
6226409
Not that you needed to change it, it didn't not make sense, it was just... bad for Spike, and sorta... out of character for Generosity to be asking for gifts from someone regularly to justify his company, but I don't see any changes to the beginning of the first scene with Rarity.
6226546
I only change the part that didn't make sense. Im too lazy to do a full scene change. Also rarity can be very greedy at times, remember. She kinda tricked spike into giving her a giant ruby.
I'm just distracted by poor Hapless' fate... dude is more of a buttmonkey than Spike was. Still, nice story. I'll keep my eyes open for a sequel if you decide to do one. Sweetie's crush was adorable too. And Spike's reaction to the kiss. Cousin Spike needs to come back and visit more
...Too distracted by the mailbox pony. Poor guy.
Hmm... What DOES that mean? (google search...)
Ah. Nice use of words!
6677160
I'm going to be completely honest. I actually used a thesaurus for the word intelligent. I cheated a bit.
Funny thing, I can actually see this happening.
Element of Generosity, everyone. *Ding*
Wow... really? Just... really?
This was enjoyable, and a nice read. Some missing words, but nothing that I can remember by the end. Good work.
This is really good!