My marefriend Vinyl Scratch, has been wanting to, well, do as marefriends do. Problem is I've never seen her that way before. What is wrong with me? I know it sounds sounds silly, but I'm afraid. And not the kind of excited afraid. I just really don't want this to go where she wants it. Does that make me a horrible person?
Well here we go then, let's give this a pop. My first go at FiM Fiction. This story was originally written for an English assignment. Due to it's praise I thought I'd ponify it and lob it on here.
I wrote this because I've never seen a fic tackle the topic of asexuality. I think it's an interesting topic, and one that is close to my heart.
I think it's a little too short for my liking, but there was a 1100 word limit. (which the original one hits exactly)
Link to original:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1tww5lCRJ8vkJ789jlYlyXWlXFqaB_5Xj7JWpl57_i7A/edit
Link to cover art:
http://sarvstergal.deviantart.com/art/Octavia-wallpaper-352932695
I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. If not, tear it to shreds, and help me improve.
I’ll be able to spur her subtle [spurn]??
5308858
Thank you.
I'll go ahead and change it.
I think I got the reference :D
"Once more unto the breach, once more" is from the song "Calling", from "The World Ends With You", right ?
Oh, and it was good. I'm on Octavia's side, I don't think it should be a duty but rather a mutual thing.
5315188
I agree, and speaking from experience here. It can be pretty harrowing to be in that situation.
"Once more unto the breach"
That was one reference, to Shakespeare actually, Henry V is where it originally came from. Although that has been used several times.
I suppose I did promise reward. What do you think?
There is another reference though. One far more blatant if you know the source material.
5315266
I can imagine, as a man I'll never do that to my girlfriend, if she doesn't want so be it, I'm here to pleasure her, not to force her.
Damn, I think I'm more knowing of alternative pop culture than the classics xD Shame on me ! But I shall read it one day !
Naah, i don't deserve the reward, keep it for someone who can figure it out right (though I wonder what it is).
I'm afraid I don't know it then. But I'm rather curious, maybe you can PM me the answer ?
5315336
I agree it should always be mutual. I think the hard part there certainly for Octavia, was not understanding her own asexuality. She doesn't see herself as adequate because she can't muster these feelings. She also feels as if she's being a bad marefriend. Vinyl too, could see it the same way. She might not feel as if she's making Octy feel happy, which can really make things bitter.
You could just say it's a multi layered reference, that could reference that line, which is used quite commonly.
That's the original though
Sure thing I will PM you.
I'll be the subtle one and say that Vinyl is going to have a lot of time with her hoof, if you know what I mean...
5402882
It's so hard to find another asexual these days and I feel so happy right now.
Anyway, I think your story was very enjoyable. Octavia's thoughts on sex describe the stereotypical asexual pretty accurately, minus the constant cake jokes. I say 'stereotypical' because some asexuals do enjoy sex, but it's more for themselves than lusting for their partners, if that makes sense. Still, all asexuals are great asexuals and Octavia is a lovely one.
This was a nice read.
5412672
Yes!
I actually yelled that, when I received this comment. Nice to meet another ace on here.
A bit dramatic and stereotypical. However, Ace Octavia is a great idea.
5435025
What do you mean? How do you think it could have been improved upon?
5435065 Well, for one thing, both of their reactions seem a bit... extreme. And it's not that yelling and hurt feelings are unrealistic, it just seemed rushed. One moment Vinyl was ready to jump Octavia's bones, and the next she was screaming. Octavia went from terrified to just plain pissed off.
I think if the story was lengthened, paced a bit better, it would improve greatly.
As far as my statement of it being stereotypical, that may be a bit too far on my part, but the reasons I believed this are: You immediately portrayed Octi as being sex-repulsed, when of course that's not the only kind of asexual. And you portrayed her partner (an allosexual) as asexual-phobic right off the bat; while not entirely untrue or unrealistic, Vinyl's attitude just seemed off.
5435189
I agree with the pacing. But the original story had a word limit of 1100 words. And I know it's cheap, but I liked it and ponyfied it.
Yep, I chose Octy and Vinyl for those reasons exactly. They fit the charectarization for that. I also chose the repulsed type of asexual, for the reason it was the most stereotypical type.
Clearly you've never read this fanfic then.
As for your story, I like it. Though Vinyl's reaction feels a tad too extreme, I still enjoyed reading.
Also:
5412672
5412739
Yay!
Hello my fellow aces, who wants cake?
5456429
Yay! Welcome to FiM Fiction's growing asexual community.
Let us make cake!
Thanks for the recommendation, I'll certainly have a read, possibly tonight.
As for Vinyl being extreme. That's mainly because I had a word limit, and therefore had to convey as much emotion as I could in as short a period of time as possible. Then again, that may just be a poor excuse.
5456510
Poor excuse or no, it didn't detract too much from the story when everything's said and done. Like I said, I still enjoyed reading it.
Also, this picture:
fc08.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2013/038/a/8/octavia_wallpaper_by_sarvstergal-d5u4klz.png
5456548
Welp, I think I've got me some new cover art. Do you have an original link for that?
5456429 Yes! More friends! I want cake!
Well done! The story and language flowed well, and I got a very interesting glimpse of another perspective. I've rarely if ever considered what asexuality would be like, and I certainly feel better acquainted with the concept now.
As for the question (if you can call it that) about mutual desire for sex, I'm definitely on Tavi's side. I don't think there should really be any duty in a relationship. Understanding, friendship, love, yes. But no duty. People (and ponies) in a relationship should make their basic judgements from wanting to make each other happy. Nothing more, nothing less.
At the end, there was an oddly appropriate dream. Has Luna been spying?
Anyway, great story. I enjoyed reading it.
5639473
Well as the asexual, you can guess who's side I'm on here. However I do think that Vinyl has a point, imagine how you'd feel if your love interest told you that they weren't sexually attracted to you? I can't imagine it would be a very nice feeling. Especially since Tavi hasn't elaborated on her asexuality yet.
As far as the dream. Well ten points if you can get the reference.
6102241
I think I should take that as a compliment, so thank you very much.
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/177714/i-am-not-gay
You didn't look hard enough
6113007
You're not the first to link me to that. But that doesn't stop you being right.
I did enjoy that fic though. It was really quite sweet.
That reference though. *Thumbs up*
6156970
Well done, someone actually spotted it. Think I must cri now
FEEELS!
EEEEEEEEE!!!! *hugs* THIS IS AMAZING!!!!!!!!! I'M ASEXUAL AND HOMOROMANTIC, AND I'M ALWAYS UNREPRESENTED, AND, EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
5456429
CAKE?!?!! Who said cake?!?!?! Does it come with dragons and scrabble!?!?!?!????!??! And rainbows for my romantic orientation.
5412672
I'm starting to wonder how many aces just searched "asexual" into the browse section and ended up with this.
Hey, look! I'm ace, too!
6489595
Why thank you, thank you. I really think there is a lack of asexual representation out there in general, and when we do get an asexual they tend to be eccentric British madmen who are eithers psychopaths, geniuses or both.
I find the asexuality aspect to be a particularly interesting twist to a TaviScratch fic.
I do think that it was a rather short and sudden introduction to the story, but I am looking forward to seeing what is to come, be it a continuation of this story (which I hope happens) or whatever you choose to write next.
One question though: Why does this story have the "Sex" tag?
It seems illogical to me seeing as this story is clearly going to be about asexuality.
Also, that's a lot of bloody comments
7916705
Forgive my late comment, I was away visiting some friends in university.
I know this story is incredibly short, but that's because it was a work assignment that I rather liked and therefore ponyfied to post here. Basically to test the waters. If you really want there is a continuation of this story, but I'd not recommend it, and it will not be finished. I'd written what I'd wanted to write in this one, and the end result would have been somewhat similar. By the end of that story, it simply became soul crushing to write.
If you're interested I have continued working on another story called Horse of Cards. Completely different from this, so I'm not sure how much I can recommend it to you, but it's about a royal guard who wants to protect Equestria through any means necessary.
The sex tag is in there because it nearly got turned into a sex scene? I'm not 100% sure it's needed, but I thought I'd play it safe, in any case it's teen rated so no clop should be expected anyway.
7926276
In all honesty I wasn't really expecting a reply at all since most authors brush off my comments, so as you can imagine, I was a bit surprised at seeing a reply to my comment.
I usually stick to reading only TaviScratch stories, but I may give Horse of Cards a shot if it's at all similar to this one.
7926406
Well I reply to most if not all of my comments, and enjoy interacting with my audience as much as possible.
Well, you may or may not like it honestly. I can't with a good conscience fully recommend it if you're only on here for OctoScratch. It's a political thriller, so nothing of the sort. And I can't really recommend my other OctoScratch fic either. But this, this one was fun.
What is you're other OctoScratch fic about?
7929459
It's an extension of this story, but like I said I can't recommend it. It's also incomplete, and frankly I've no plans to ever continue it. That thing became soul crushing to write
7929506
A continuation of this one? I will most definitely be reading it. Sadly, I cannot offer any real assistance in finishing it because I simply have no talent in writing. I'm more of a poet.
7929568
Well, fair enough, but I can't recommend it, and won't continue it. If you want to know what happened though, feel free to PM me, I'd be more than happy to tell you how I planned the ending. If I can remember that is.