Ozzy Shore, one of the first human settlers in Equestria, starts his new life as Fleur de Lis' new secretary. How will he handle difficult obstacles like his close-minded manager, and living under Canterlot's uptight, social norms?
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Prereader comment. Not all details discussed below will be implemented in the final draft.
That picture at the end...
Anyway, it's actually spelled Hors d'oeuvre, despite the fact that it sounds like "orderve". Also, you referred to Fancy Pants as a female.
Not much to say otherwise, but I do have a question for you... is this a self-insert?
4800851 Fixed. As for the self-insert, that would be a no. I WILL admit there are bits and pieces of myself displayed in not only Ozzy, but even Shining as well. In the end, no, Ozzy is actually a completely different character compared to me.
I want a monocle now.
Monocles are indeed corrective for people with one bad eye. However, by the 19th century, they also became somewhat popular as Gentleman's apparel.
Im guessing in the next chapter, like most stories where the protagonist has to deal with the upper crust of equestrian society, there will be some rude comments about a hairless monkey working for Fluer. Then a climax scene where Ozzy confronts and or fights Fluers ex boyfriend.
This is such a great story! I think this should be in the Featured list!
You sir are a great writer, but I sense a troll from you, if the last 2 chapters are any indication it has become obvious who Ozzy will end up with
Figuring out the mistery of how monocles stays in place is the same one as Mopheus' Sunglasses from Matrix, no one fucking knows
Should be "even if I did go to prom". Aside from that, good chapter as usual!
4804831 It already had for a few days.
4805034 Fixed. Thanks.
Okay, I will personally KILL anyone you choose in return for you to write this into the story!
Seriously. Name 'em and they're goners
i still think some of the mares there will flirt with him I mean a secretary that doubles as a body guard and its look like a very outgoing guy? yeah he is practically honey going into a bee party oh boy I wonder how shinny will react to that
I'm not sure you should keep the 45 minutes later type things, but I do like the time stamps.
I actually want a Shiny and Ozzy shipping to happen a tad bit more than I want a Fluer and Ozzy shipping.....is that a bad thing? :/
4805460 Yeah, I'm thinking about changing those and just do the time stamps alone from this point on.
eight by twelve, and eight by ten. Numbers are supposed to be written out unless its a really long number, or it's a date. And nobody, to my knowledge, says "eight ex ten" So yeah. Still considered an abbreviation.
Monocles really good if you're far-sighted-- you can quickly switch from one location to the other without having to take on and off glasses of bend your head to move your bifocals. If you're so fancy you need two of them, get a pince-nez like Roosevelt.
This was a great chapter. I enjoyed the reconciliation and the slight OzXShiny shipping.
Going all out? why I had this feeling that Shinning way to go all out is going into one of those pool parties where everyone is naked?
morpheus
4806577 Okay, that was funny, but I don't get how that applies to this chapter?
4807922 I think the dual monocle thing? His glasses just rest on the brim of his nose. No arms on them and they're basically there for aesthetics.
I wear glasses because I have poor eye sight in my right eye and completely blind in the other. A monocle sounds uncomfortable to wear. Unless you can get ones that look like glasses that go across half of your face. By the way, I'm really [ing] this. Keep it up!
4807922 in the authors notes at the end
I actually bought a monocle and a pocket watch for a friends birthday so that he could feel fancy. When the monocle arrived I had to at least try it out of course, and I found that it was actually to big for my eye socket. I couldn't squint to keep it in place since it was too big. It may not have been very practical, but damn did I feel pretty fancy at that moment.
That picture at the end though...so damn funny!
4808382 Does it have to do with how the guy in the morpheus video wear those glasses?
Same with glasses; there's monocles that actually functioned for improving eyesight, while others are made just for style. I'd imagine most people back in the day just wore them to be fashionable. Kind of like those fake glasses people wear today, if you can call those fashionable (Shots fired )
As for functionality, I honestly don't know either, as i've never tried to put on a monocle. I know it's got something to do with it fitting your socket and pushing down on it with your brow to keep it in place, but i'd imagine that'd just make anyone with a monocle look irritated all the time.
4809228 yeah his glasses looks like two monocles glued together by a stick
That was a great chapter that had a lot of stuff happening and it was really moving. This chapter also gave me a new thought about how I've been approaching third person present time rather than third person past tense since you like to have the main character in first person real time whenever he starts to give a little more detail it turns out it's happening in real time rather than in the past, which I feel like is a very nice twist that style of story telling that it seem like the story is being told in the past, but it's actually happening in the here and now. Especially when you keep having the characters notice him thinking for a long time. Now I hope Oz will be able to make sure he doesn't make things more awkward between his two new friends if they started to crush on him.
I have a feeling he's going to end up sleeping with both Shining
ArmorStar and Fleur at some point...Loving this
Love the chapter and what a fitting end to it too. Man I wish i can read the next chapter but it bed time for me. I guess I read to tomorrow Good Night.,
So... when chapter 6 started out with a clop warning, I was all like, "Woah man, this is totally radical!" and then the clop turned out to be a description of a nude fleur de lis, and I cried. someone being naked isn't clop, well, actually, I'm wrong, it kinda is, somehow. but it was still pretty misleading and tear inducing given how Ozzy made up with Shining Star in the beginning of chapter 6, I totally thought they were going to get it on. I mean, it wouldn't have made sense, so I'm glad it didn't happen, but I THOUGHT that was what was going to happen. Seriously though meng, we like, REALLY need an Oz/Shiny/Fleur/Chitchat orgy/foursome. That'd be way hot.
(Chitchat is the unicorn mare from chapter 4 who ran the news station, for all you plebs who might not remember her.)
As I understand it, monocles existed at first mostly as a form of corrective lens. If you were rich, you could afford to get them custom fitted, and that actually made them quite comfortable. Poorer folks had to deal with less well fitting lenses.
The monocle exists because back in the day, the science of optometry did not have an accurate way to measure refractive error in both eyes, and so basically it was easier to set the refraction rate in one lens than in two. Nowadays we can accurately measure the refractive error in both eyes to great accuracy, and grind lenses to different strengths for each eye individually.
Anyone who has ever had a set of glasses in which one eye is badly off can tell you how headache inducing and annoying it is.
They mostly fell out of style due to advancements in optometry, and being associated with stereotypical 1890s fat cat capitalists, who had a pretty negative reputation amongst most of the populace.
BOOM, BAM, BOP.
BADDA BOP BOOM
POW
ell.akamai.coub.com/get/bucket:12.21/p/coub/simple/cw_gif_big/e44d9b920e1/3c61c0cb4a0ffc6f3b20a/1409458185_1386478015_1637qjc_3han0u0.gif
Ozzy must've been having a high diet of Turkish honey, because he just laid it on smooth!
If you're trying to make it hard to choose between Shiny and Fleur to root for, you're doing a DAMNED good job of it...
Let's just take a second here and instead of reading the actual story, let read the chapter titles
That shit tells a real story
Wow.... Ozzy's brother can eat a dick.
And the nobel prize goes to Oz for NOT fucking up in a situation in which 99.9999999999999999% of males usually do. Bravo, you magnificent son of a bitch.
I hope Ozzy is adopted, because he seems nice while his brother sounds like a complete asshole.
Great story by the way. You don't put in too many cliches, nor rush the characters into interactions. You are one damned fine writer my friend. Keep up the good work mate!
5219072 Give this man a Nobel Prize for answering that age old question.
Gah. I know it's written I a way that fluer doesn't have an accent but... I can't help but read her lines in a French accent
6407360 Her accent may be more subtle than a regular French's. English (or perhaps Equestrian would be called on their world) was her first language learned before she was taught French (or Prench).
could somebody explain to me what slacks are? i assume they're just trousers, but there might be something important i'm missing because it's not a word we use here :p
6505576 I'm not sure about trousers, but slacks are pants that aren't made of denim like jeans. There is one kind that goes with a set when wearing a suit for formal events, while another that has a more durable material is used for certain workplaces.
That's all I can really say without looking it up.
4804925
Morpheus's sunglasses are Pince-nez glasses, they're held on by pinching the nose. A couple companies make replicas of them.
That was a sweet moment between Fleur and Shining.