• Member Since 12th Jun, 2014
  • offline last seen Jan 24th, 2019

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Spitfire has been distraught ever since the conflict she had with Soarin at the tryouts for the Equestria Games, and as she recalled her past failures, these feelings have only built up inside of her since. When her depression becomes too large for her to hide, Soarin notices her plight just before Spitfire can react. How will he react to the emotions she has been bottling up for a long time?

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 12 )

Why can't Spitfire say her feelings to Soarin?

4552844 Made a mistake there. I've duct taped it,so it should make a little more sense.

I read through your story and thought it was a good "feel good" fic. I, like you, thought Spitfire got a raw deal in the last episode with Soarin. You might want to get an editor, however. There were a few sentences that could be fixed. Example:

The Wonderbolts, wearing their trademark blue and yellow uniforms that glowed in the sunlight, bowed to the huge crowd of ponies and griffons that had traveled miles to see them perform and erupted in cheers, chanting their name. Like every time before, it was another wildly successful show, full of stunts that boggled the mind and techniques using the crackling thunderclouds that formed behind them as they flew much like paintbrushes.

I think it would read easier like this:

The Wonderbolts flew through the sky like paintbrushes against a canvas, their trademark blue and yellow uniforms glowing in the sunlight. With each mind-boggling stunt the crowd cheered and chanted. It was a successful show, but then again, it always was.

I'm no master wordsmith - this is just an example - but I feel as though a lot of words could be cut back or rearranged into a tighter flowing narrative.

Keep up the awesome work though! :raritywink:

4559019 Thanks for the advice. I'll be more careful with my wordplay next time, but I'm glad you enjoyed the story anyways. :twilightsmile:

This was a great story, I was listening to "I'll Stand By You" by The Pretenders at the part where Soarin' was talking to Spitfire and I felt like I was tearing up too.

Great Job,

4601903 Thanks. I felt my heartstrings being pulled while I was writing this, so I'm glad you liked it.

An okay story, however, personally, I felt you could have done more with it. I'll give it a five out of ten.

I really liked this story. :pinkiesmile: I also felt dissappointed to what the writters did to my favorite character in that episode just to boost rainbow's development and make her get her key from that. Their were other ways they could have done that episode and for Rainbow to get her key and that became the worst episode to me in that season. The same as The Wonderbolt Academy being the worst to me in s3 but those are for other reason being similar and not similar to this episode. I know it's just a show but I don't like how they did Spitfire for that. Spitfire and Soarin is my #1 pair of this series and this and stuff like that will not make me stray from this couple. Though I really pray they don't do something like this again for s5. :pinkiesad2:

5167247 Sadly, it seems like the writers are determined to make Spitfire Trixie 2.0, only without the huge fandom following. It's almost impossible to find someone who still likes Spitfire. Anyway, while this was one of my earlier attempts at a story, I'm still glad you enjoyed it.

And for the record, while Wonderbolts Academy was okay in my opinion, Rainbow Falls is undoubtedly the worst episode in the series. There are no redeeming qualities of that episode in my opinion, and Spitfire's unexplained heel turn was only a part of why that episode was terrible. But as you said, it's just a show, but I still believe that doesn't excuse bad episodes. FiM has proven to be much better than that.

Spitfire is best pony . reply if u agree.

6336586 Yeah, she's definitely among my favorites. :pinkiesmile:

Alrighty, that was a good, short read. I hope this weekend's episode doesn't hurt her and the Wonderbolts's reputation.

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