This story is a sequel to TiM: The Truth in Meanings
Story number two of the Twilight is Magic series. See author notes in first chapter for link to read order.
Note: this is largely a mindless fluff piece, if your expecting something deeper just move on.
This takes place six years after the events of TiM: The Truth in Meanings. It is a one-shot story detailing one day in Rainbow Dash and Twilight Sparkle's new life of being parents.
This picture was my inspiration for the kids, change three things, Twilight is an alicorn, the unicorn is a colt with a rainbow mane, and Rainbow's wings are gold
Chapters (1)
you know they have a alicorn twilight tag right?
4115418
good catch, thanks
wouldn't mind this becoming a mini-series. just a randomly updated story of their adventures in their new life's. i mean, not even Tartarus knows how long they're going to live, so they're bound to have all sorts of crazy adventures! maybe this could be where you put them when if/when you get an idea for one?
4115637
Had not considered that, I will keep it in mind, Would be interesting to do the funeral for their other friends/ grandchildren births/ 1000 years later/ 10000 years later
Ill keep that in mind.
Wow, just... what is wrong with you?!
You churn out chapters and fics like there's no tomorrow! I look away 5 minutes and you finish truth in meanings and submit a 16k word fic?
It's way too impressive, I have a feeling you're making everybody else look bad :D
4115654 that's all i ask. glad i could help!
4115675 Sorry?
No but in all seriousness I have a little OCD when it comes to things I like. Whenever I find something new that interests me I tend to jump right into the deep end and go from there. The same thing happened when I started writing stores. It started off as just a put up or shut up. Then I really started enjoying it and it soon became the only thing I could think of.
How did you like the story anyway? I have yet to get a comment about the actual story.
4115815
Nono! That wasn't a complaint or anything it's just, for you to write, review and release the stuff you do, at the rate you do, at THIS level of quality is nothing short of amazing.
Really.
And I do like the fic :)
Probably shouldn't have read it before finishing Truth in Meanings... oops.
I like their kids though, they have good characters. My only complaint is that the conversation occasionally, JUST OCCASIONALLY comes off as a bit stilted, such as Rainbow and Twilight saying how much they love each other, their kids etc. every five minutes.
Seeing as how you've done an epic ONE HUNDRED THOUSAND WORD ADVENTUUUUUUURE, I'd love to see some more slice of life from you.
4115887 Fair critique
I went so far into it because I wanted to convey that after the events of Truth in Meanings they did not take life or each other for granted. They were living life for their kids and each other. However, when writing what you try and convoy and what the readers get are not always the same thing. (Might explain my 5/5 up down votes, although without comments about why people don't like it its hard to know for sure)
Ill try to keep in mind that sometimes less is more.
If I do any more of these, this will be the last one thats THIS big. It was intimidating opening up the word document and seeing 78 pages starting at me. I will break them up into chapters next time.
OHMYGOSHOHMYGOSH AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *Nuclear heart bomb*
4116393
took a week to write but i am happy with it!!!
TWIDASHFORVER!!! ~shameless plug~
4116403 Until you hopefully change your future plans, We will happily accept this as the sequel. It's just so... freaking... BEAUTIFUL!!!
TwiDash on,
~Ava
4116422
Ah crap, I just got an idea for a sequel… So much for taking some time off from writing...
4116461 and I was going to ask for more
Ever is Finite
Eternity is Infinite
Therefore I conclude foreternity is much longer than forever... Though typing that took forever
4120685
You lost me there...
OH MY GOD THIS IS THE BEST STORY I HAVE EVVVEERRR READ PLEASE LET THERE BE MORE!!!!!
4122619
If you haven't read it yet check out truth in meanings, the story that led up to this.
As far as a sequel goes… I am bouncing around ideas in my head right now. We will see...
I'll go do that but I would absolutely love it if you made a sequel to go along with this story
4115887
Not sure if you heard I started the sequal to truth in meanings and this story
4138860
Indeed I did notice, and I'm trying to get to it as fast as I can :)
Love your stories, and that this series will go on!
I didn't know Day was a filly, I taught he was a colt.
also, who else thinks that the picture of Aurora that they are sending to everyone is going to create a cult following.
and i see what you did there, Day = bright (as in smart)
4145674
Good catch, thanks!
corrected fillies to foals
10 down votes, not one comment as to why, what I did wrong, or what I could have done different.
Time for the dance of my people.
Golden wings? 27 foot wingspan? Pony Spike? Ataxia? Rainbow a princess? DAMN IT!!! You got me curious! Looks like I'm gonna have to force myself through a tragedy after all.
Otherwise, this was very good! While I'm not all for clop, I do enjoy the book ends a lot. I'm gonna get some sleep now. I'll need it if I'm gonna survive TiM tomorrow.
4211375
I was afraid Twilight might have to send you to your room to think about what you had done
4211898 Twilight is best autopilot mom. The best part about that was that they all obeyed without complaint.
4212152
Lol with her power(both physical and political) they really don't have a choice.
I love the idea that they would have ingrained responses to certain actions
"No buts!"
"What are u sorry for?"
"Go to your room and think about what u did."
I contuned a few of these in the sequal as well even though it's 34 years after
Part two of my marathon reading/reviewing session.
Like what was suggested for viewers to do with the cover image, change a few details and this story would easily stand alone from the version of Equestria this story takes place in. As such, you can probably read this story without reading the prequal and enjoy it just as much or as little either way.
I like cute slice of life things, and this story has that and plenty of madly in love TwiDash. It depicts them in the role of new parents to their twin offspring, Aurora Flash and Dayspring Gleam. A lot of the events in this story read like a checklist from most family-sitcoms ever, with kids getting into trouble and wrapping their parents around their hooves.
See my previous review for the technical comments. They're still here, and they're still just as bad, and just as common.. I must applaud you for being internally consistent with the things you make errors on.
If I thought the lack of noticeable personality of Rainbow Dash was bad in The Truth in Meanings, they not only did not improve here, they managed to get worse somehow. Apparently love and having her soul welded to Twilight has domesticated the hell out of Rainbow Dash, while having kids has turned her into what Fluttershy would be if she had a spine. Again, change a few details here and there and you pretty much would have any sitcom mom ever wearing a rainbow wig. I guess motherhood would change a mare, but this isn't even really a story about Rainbow Dash anymore.
Now, one question was asked in the a/n about parents reading this. Not being a parent myself, I can't give you the sort of authoritative answer you're seeking, but I can tell you from many years of close experience with parents while I myself have been an adult, I can tell you that parents do indeed think their child is the most cute and adorable thing ever. How much those around them agree is open to a wide range of results obviously, and some kids are genuinely cute to adults other than their parents.
Aurora isn't that cute.
Sure, the narration in the story beats us over the head and tries to tell us she is. The puppets in the story that have been labeled as her parents, Twilight and Rainbow Dash say she is and act like she is, and they have the backing of every other puppet in the story as well. However, they're all wrong.
As much as you may try to tell us she is cute, you fail to actually show her being cute. Overeating cookies and puking isn't adorable. Being easily bribed by her brother with cookies isn't adorable. Posessing the common child trait of puppydog eyes is not especially cute. In fact you've really worked hard at presenting a fairly boring and generic seeming kid with very little personality and a whole lot of super exaggerated responses from everyone in Ponyville/Equestria.
Pumpkin and Pound Cake are cute. Read The Life and Times of a Winning Pony and various side stories set in the Winningverse that involve Dinky Do, and see how a cute filly is actually written.
Obviously Sparity is canon to your 'verse. So no surprise they have a kid too, and like the prequel, they don't actually add anything interesting to the story. I guess Ataxia is needed to form a trio with the TwiDash kids for their induction to the CMC.
In the end, the story tries to be cute, but tries too hard. Where the prequel tries to make Twilight and Rainbow go through hell (literally) just to be together, this story reads like wish fulfillment with no substance. There is conflict only really in the loosest of senses, I'd easily go so far as to call this a simple mindless fluff piece.
I was warned there would be feels. This story delivered feelings of boredom.
4272005
thats pretty much all it was. just an attempt by me to do a 180 from TiM.
TiM was my first serious story. this was my first attempt at a slice of life story.
to put it kindly, it has a few issues.
as far as an overreaching narrative I could have summarized it by saying "Twilight gets pregnant." but that is quite boring.
As my objective was a simple fluff piece of a 'day in the life' I would say that it was accomplished.
Not to say there isn't issues (Spelling, grammar, word choice. etc...)
Oh no...Oh No! She's Discord's avatar! Oh god! Poor Spike and Rarity! I'm laughing my ass off right now!!
I knew that line about Aurora killing somepony and getting away with it was foreshadowing of some sort.
And not a single punishment was dealt. Lol.
This was excellent. It was constant giggles and it gave me something to do, because it's 3:30 in the morning, and I can't sleep. I also have to work tomorrow. Thank god it's only an 8 hour shift.
I'm sorry it took so long to read this. Now that I have, I'm not even sure I want to read the next one...
Why? There's a sad tag on it, and this...this is just amazingly cute, and I'm not mentally prepared for this little world to come crashing down. On the other hand...it's a continuation of one of my favorite Twidash continuities... So I'll be reading it anyway. Also, I want to read Ava's story.
4321117 THANKS!!!
This was just an attempt at me at a slice of life story. I loved writing it so much, It was quite a lot of fun.
4321453 I absolutely love that you made Ataxia Chaos's avatar. I just can't get over that.
4321637 it seemed like too good an opportunity to pass up
A half pony/dragon and the chance to continue to annoy the mane 6! That's right up his ally. Plus he would be related to them so they can't just send him away!
4322234 Lol. It was an excellent choice. Oh, and I was really surprised by the other story when you said that Fluttershy's relationship with Applejack was strictly plutonic, because I was getting a serious AppleShy vibe in TiM... Is it because Applejack is your worst pony?
4322263 that and I don't see fluttershy bringing herself to enter that type of relationship
Also writing those two is a pain in the ass for me, so I don't really do much with them
4322274 Well, I mean, since you killed AJ off, you could have left it as is and left out the part about it being plutonic without having to write anymore for them.
4322340 I'll continue this in BoI chat
4322526 kk
this little colt like to plan everything in his life
Tense error, methinks.
5664101
Corrected, thanks!
Finished the first story already?
They actually had to ban her for life from racing, changing the rules so that princess could only watch.
Princesses maybe? I'm not sure what is meant here.
5664118
Rainbow racing is largely unfair. At this point If they continued letting her race, no one would bother competing against her.
As to not discriminate against Rainbow, the judges banned all princesses from racing.
Rainbow being a princess as she married Twilight.
None of the other princesses really cared, so it was a legal loophole they took advantage of
You're right though, it should have been princesses
5664116
And yes. I read fast. Honestly I'm surprised your stories aren't more well known.
5664137
I tend not to be very popular, as such my stories probably suffer for that reason.
Plus you are reading stories I've spent hours editing, when they were first posted, they were pretty bad lol
as you get into Best of Intentions, you'll probably see a lot more errors. (Kinda like this one lol)
Price of victory is heavily edited though. I think I had like 5 editors at one point.
but as you're already here, we can just you are here we can just give to you now.
ErrErroror
5664270
Also, should be "give it to you now"
5664280
In my defense, it was a copy paste error.
Yeah, thats a lie lol. Just a buck up on my part. Corrected, thanks.
I'm considering revamping this story into three separate chapters once I'm done with Cost of Defeat.
I figured it would be a good idea to dial down some of the lovey-dovy parts, and maybe add a little more with Aurora and Day...
Something I'm considering anyway.