• Member Since 11th Jan, 2014
  • offline last seen 1 hour ago

Twidashforever


Something isn't beautiful because it lasts.

Sequels1

Comments ( 22 )

Hey! That picture looks awfully familiar...

Uh-huh? Oh, yeah, it was supposed to be a story 2.5, forgot:twilightsheepish:
Glad it's out:pinkiehappy:
See you tomorrow, after I'm done with it:twilightsmile:

Woohoo! It's out! Bow chica wut WUT! :moustache:

You know, I dont like Rarity. To be honest, she's one of my least favorite of the main characters, and she certainly my least favorite amongst mane six... and today I'm on her side, name of the fic give me a hope that Ataxia will really learn well:facehoof:

And, here goes nothing:twilightsheepish:

would would

the the

albit

albeit.

nopony else nopony else

His the last words were

I do that believe there is no need in "the".

Her smiled increased

smile.

pointing at the little red but that

button.

was reworded as

"rewarded", in this case.

herself off watched the twins

I think it should be "watching":unsuresweetie:

Twins, at least as far Ataxia knew anyway.

"as far as"?

The smaller one, the with the

No need in first "the".

There were two ponies in the stall, but didn’t surprise her though.

I'm not sure if there is anything wrong:unsuresweetie:

he was truly enjoying

she.

being e new

a.

continuted to llick

Was looking for one mistake, found two:rainbowhuh:

as mile as the saw

a smile; as she.

somethings

some things.

to green and blue i, before

to green and blue, before

stories

"storeys" or "floors" instead of stories, i would say:unsuresweetie:

Look out for double gap if you wish, there's about five of them in the text.

6585544

changes posted!

Ataxia will really learn

I think you answered your own question here. It is Ataxia and you already know how she turns out. lol

I thought Pinkie was your least fav of the mane 6? Or at least that's what your page says.

>Twidashforever uh-huh, yeah... when i make that test i make it kinda lame, wasn't even able to remember about 1/3 of ponies, so...:twilightsheepish:
Gotta change it, thought, if it missleads people:twilightsheepish:

Ataxia, the daughter of Spike and Rarty, is a hoofful on the best of days. And today is not one of those days. Faced with a last minute order from the princesses, Rarity's patience with her antics will officially reach its end.

Rarity.

See you in about five hours:twilightsmile:

Now i want to burn both of them to ashes, going good so far:twilightsheepish:
Oh, crap, will need to reread it, tomorrow:moustache:

6597167
6597502

Rarity raising pony-discord.

It was never going to end well.

There was supposed to be a long, philosophical comment, but I'm lazy, so:
Yeah, this stories is good, and the more the better:twilightsmile:

of image of

No need for first "of".

and while one those nights she’d simply sleep in the spear bed room, that god…

Spare; maybe "while on one of"? "got" instead of "god"?

tongue war her and Flitter

she.

medical ring

but wanting to try and new position for this

"an/a" instead of "and"?

She felt herself used and be used

Can see no sense there:unsuresweetie:

before i read this, to be clear, Ataxia (as well as Twilight and Rainbow's twins) are around 16 years old, and their soon to be newborn from the last book is around 10, right?

6639149 Yes on the older ones. Night's eight about to be nine.

Dayspring is the oldest, followed by Aurora, and then Ataxia. However, their births are really close together.

Well, Radiant is the oldest lol.

This story is my first attempt to close the gap between story 2 and 3. That was 34 year time jump. So, because it's newer, it should be better written lol.

Although it is (mostly) a clop fic.

6639366 so, by book 3, Dayspring and Aurora are neary 40? Damn. (since they're 6 in book 2 and all) Will they also have the extremely long life span that Twi and Dash are said to have? Or is that explained later?

6639675
A regret on my part, yes (The time skip). As far as Aurora and Dayspring's lifespans, it's been hinted at, but not made canon yet.

I'll say this, in the current story I'm writing (Story 13), Aurora's 59 and she looks like she did in her 30s

“Ahh, yes, the whore of Equestria, everypony, my daughter, the slut!” Rarity said before anypony could stop her.

... and this just in: Rarity has officially become worst pony of Ponyville.

"Ataxia downed half the bear"
Aren’t ponies vegetarian? Since when do they eat bears?

6985483 Good find, corrected, thanks!

6904602

I would say in that instant Rarity truly loves her daughter the most. The first (and last I might add) time I went to a strip club, (I was dragged into the place) my mother had found out. I was texting my dad. She bombarded me with several texts stating I was not allowed to come to their house anymore. And she strongly "advised" me to burn the clothes I wore to the place. I turned my phone off after around the 5th text. The next morning I woke up, turned my phone on, saw several more texts copied and pasted from the former night. I expected it. What I did not expect was the last one. She told me to come over. She wanted to talk.

Admittedly, I was very hesistant. I went over and talked to her.

I had come to find out her father was a regular at the club in the town she was raised.

The conversation carried on. Bad things between her mother, herself, and her father. Needless to say it was a very heart breaking story.

What I'm trying to say is love doesn't always come in the form that everyone expects. Tough love, thats what they call it. I had done something once that her father did frequently. He is not a very good man. He was an alcoholic, and was very abusive.

Sometimes love is shown in the most obvious ways. A lot of the time though, love is show through fear or anger. It may not be seen as such at the time, but a day later, or even years later, you will look back and see what it truly was.

In this case it was my mother trying to protect me from becoming her father.

So think twice before you make any rash decisions. Sometimes you just have to suck it up and be the bigger person. Eventually, if they truly love you, they will make up for it.

6640021 Ever thought about a precurser? Would love a couple years before this story about Twilight's and Rainbow's "family adventures"

Explicit sex has entered the series :ajsmug:

These stories didn't get the attention that they should have and now you're gone. It's unfortunate, but nothing lasts :moustache:

Educated guess that may be a spoiler if I am correct:
Also thought Ataxia was an avatar for Chaos from the first mention. Your story beats in TiM haven't been a surprise for me at any point so far but that isn't necessarily bad. Sometimes getting exactly what you expect can be fulfilling.

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