• Member Since 4th May, 2013
  • offline last seen Jul 12th, 2013

DetMan


T

Inspired by Twisted Spectrum's Five Score, Divided By Four, a story that has become the most recently popular Human to Pony Transformation fan fiction on /mlp/

Jenny Smith was a substitute professor for a local community college before the changes began. It all started on the day she turned twenty five, at the exact time. Her thigh burned and itched, and when she looked, it was a pastel colored hour glass that caused her so much trouble.

She, along with her friend named Dana, are slowly turning into ponies. But Jenny will soon find out, that not only is she becoming a pony, but also something more than that. Not only is she turning into a pony, but a certain alien that is the last of his kind in the whole universe.

This is my contribution to the Five Score, Multiplied by More group. I've always wanted to write about the adventures of people turning into ponies myself, so I decided to write a few fictions. This one is a bit less original, as it is in the Five Score universe, but it will eventually be a much more different story than most, as a certain famous alien that is the last of its kind is the main character in it.

Hope you enjoy reading!

Chapters (7)
Comments ( 102 )

I am interested in seeing where this goes.

I was unaware Four Score had inspired spinoffs. I'm glad I found this. I'm looking forward to more, especially what Jack's story is.

2537509


Four Score has many a spin off, and many more in the making. (Cough cough wink wink nudge nudge)

Also, I love this story. Very clever writing..


Wasn't "The Doctor's Daughter" named "Jenny Smith? I know it had a J and a generic last name...

Yes her name was indeed that>>2537891

2539865


Ah-hah! This author just got a thousand times better! :raritystarry:

Is Jack last name Harkness?

I'm fighting the urge here to let out some answers, but that would be SPOILERS! :pinkiegasp:
I'm going to update every week on this, so check back often for anything new.

Glad to see that you guys like it so far.

2542660 ...
:twilightoops:I-I honestly think I am addicted to this story...:twilightblush: I have literally read this story like 7-8 times in the past two days...//dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/shrug_Derpy_Hooves.png
Let's see if the next chapter can keep my interest as well as this one did:derpytongue2:

I'm pretty sure Jack will become "Jack Harkness" aka Star Hunter :ajsmug:

i just noticed something: Jenny really seems to like the color blue, what with the blue cake and towel. Probably just a coincidence though, I often over-think things like that!
Assuming that Jack is Jack Harkness, why does he remember who the Doctor is (I'm assuming he does, he gave Jenny the key). Was he never ponified, and is the "traditional" Jack, or does he remember because fixed points can't be altered? I'm assuming that the thing he wants to show her is the TARDIS. Also, Jenny seems to be remembering things faster than the other ones. Is that just artistic/writing license, to make the story move faster, or is it because she is a Time Lord/Pony, and is therefore infinitely smarter than anything else.

Like flipping a switch. Now to see if it can be unflipped...

But first, the Doctor reacts to be being female! That should be priceless. Looking forward to it.

I like this. Not sure why, but I like it.

Definatly the Jack I thought. Well, this is going to be awkward for him. Then again, he should be used to weird situations. Is it before Jack joined Torchwood?

Still no " Trust him, he's the doctor." then he response with "What. What did you just say?" line
still awesome though

YES!!!!!!!! CAPTAIN JACK FOR THE WIN!!!!! If he weren't so lenient with himself on the sexual side, he'd be my hero. He's just that badass.

So, The Doctor just suddenly remembers who he/she is? Or was that just a temporary blip in his/her memory, and he/she will soon return to usual?
I'm not sure weather to refer to Jenny as male or female yet, she is obviously just beginning to change.

...There. Are. NO. Words.
...Could I have some more sir? :fluttercry:
I would appriciate it very much. :twilightsheepish:

-Joex-the-Alicorn

I can't wait to see haw jack responds to pony doctor :pinkiehappy:

:pinkiehappy: Buck yeah i knew it Jackie boy is back in town :pinkiehappy:
:rainbowhuh: just wondering is jack gonna turn in to a pony too? :rainbowhuh:
:twilightsmile: Love this sooooo much !!! :twilightsmile:

this story is very good so far. :pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy:

i can't wait to see the next chapter! :pinkiehappy:

Now I understand the ending of the chapter!
Jenny forgot who she was, just like changing strings and other things.

2563237

Though I did take a few ideas from that story (It's pretty damn good) that's not the full reason why it happened. You'll see in chapter 3.:raritywink:

2550313

Assuming that Jack is Jack Harkness, why does he remember who the Doctor is (I'm assuming he does, he gave Jenny the key). Was he never ponified, and is the "traditional" Jack, or does he remember because fixed points can't be altered?

You sir, seem to forget. Captain Jack Harkness is a walking fixed point. He doesn't need to make sense! (But if the author decides he should, I'm all for it.)

2566747

I'm trying to make it show accurate, using time and stuff that was mentioned as foundation. Fixed points in time are going to happen, as well as, maybe, alternate realities(?)

I've got this huge document filled with graphs and notes so I can keep an eye on how far I can go story wise, without breaking Doctor Who canon. So that thing with Jack, yeah, he's going to be just fine.

...

Stop switching between the past and present tense!

they beat me to the door and one of them were knocking

one of them was knocking

Dana was smiling like a maniac and Jack was holding a wrapped up present that l can’t tell what’s inside, as it’s just a box wrapped in blue paper.

This sentence needs rewording to remove the redundancies. Try instead something like: "Dana was smiling like a maniac and Jack was holding a present wrapped up in blue paper, I can only wonder what's inside."

have a shit eating grin

WTF

are sure the most laziest invention ever

Should be either “are sure the most lazy invention ever” or “are sure the laziest invention ever”

I just mumble “Hey.” before I head in.

There should not be a period after “hey”.

Today is just not a normal day, isn’t it?

Should be: "Today is just not a normal day, is it?"

i’ll call you

i’m quite the attentive girl

i’ll see you later

Of course, i’ll head over...

and looks at me like i’m some kind of alien

What is it with Five Score authors forgetting to capitalize the word "I"?

2577448

And thank you very much for helping me look for the errors in there.

I don't have a proofreader, so I usually am the one that goes through for errors and what not. Also, the "I'll" is a common thing to mess up in, because it does look like a different word separate from 'I'. I'll make sure to keep note of that from now on.

(and the shit eating grin part there is a saying that goes around quite often. It's when a guy grins smugly, stupidly, or with self satisfaction)

They are in a universe where there are MLP-FiM and Doctor Who as series on tv, and they still don't recognize what happens.

2586440 Denial, perhaps? It seems too outrageous to be true. Even for the Doctor.

Also, nice tie-in with Changing Strings and Other Things.

Looking forward to more. Especially since the fob watch appears to have been only a temporary fix.

The DOCTOR does not know what is going on. we're screwed

Soo... is Rose still sending messages to the Doctor? :eeyup:

Hmm, so Rose is back? And poor Jenny, if only she knew how alien she is. :pinkiehappy:

2586741

I actually got permission by the author to let in a few peeks into their story :pinkiehappy:

And as for the Rose thing, nah don't think so. She just temporarily became Bad Wolf when she looked into the core long, long ago. BAD WOLF is actually the TARDIS core (the Time Vortex) sending out the messages, since it is actually a living thing. BAD 'TIMBER' WOLF... well you'll just have to see for yourself soon enough.

2586918

Well, she kind of did send them all over the universe, and all over time. Who's to say he never saw another one later on, that was meant for the past-him?

Chapter 4 is on a bit of a delay, because I didn't get enough time to write this week. I like to keep a deadline for new chapters, so check back tomorrow or Saturday for the new one.

0_0 Amazing.

All I can say is...poor Doctor Whooves/Jenny :pinkiesad2:


EDIT: Apparently I am first...OK?

And my tie was still loose.

Yep, this is the most important detail. :rainbowlaugh:

Two Doctors? This will help me wait for the 50th anniversary!

He grins, twisting his torso around slightly. “I’m the Doctor. Who’re you?”
“Jenny.”
“Incorrect, you’re the Doctor too.”
I set down Dana, and stand back up to face The Doctor. He looks at my suit, and smiles widely. “Oooh, ho, ho, that brings back memories. Sad memories, but sometimes good memories. Mostly.”

Personally, to reduce confusion, the pony doctor should be called doctor (W)hooves or time tuner. Makes stuff easier to track. Also, the sycic notes make more sense if TT(Time Tuner) was a future doctor, not a past one.

I've been trying to figure this out: is Jenny's sonic the Mark VI or Mark VII? Just curious.

2628211

Going to do that when the Eleventh Doctor is there more often.

2628228

Mark VII. The two are really similar, but it is Mark VII. The Eleventh obviously has the VIII version.

2626009
Well, it's even more important now that Jenny has Y chromosomes to go with the tie. Though I suppose a bolo tie would be even more appropriate, given the shape...

Sorry, digression. Anyway, definitely looking forward to more, especially since Dana can pop up essentially anywhen. Chekhov's Derp, as it were.

I don't know, it somehow seems weird to me how you wrote Big Mac's name, with a capital 'I' in the middle... It's like suggesting there should be a break, and it becomes Big-Mac-Intosh in my mind :ajbemused:

I notice his personality seems to be a combination of Jenny's and the Doctor's. I may sound heartless, but i really want the transformation to complete soon or have jenny find the fob watch so the proper Doctor can return!

2658753

According to the show writers, that's how it is properly spelled :eeyup:

I liked it better with the lower case, but eh.

2659800 His voiceactor doesn't :trollestia: http://www.peternew.net/credits/
I've seen both, yeah, but it seems like the makers aren't quite sure themselves. But either way, please continue :scootangel:

Well, so much for "the only way to return to your Equestria."

Wait. Your Equestria. Oh bother, the Doctor's gone and wandered into another continuity. Now how's he going to find his way back to the proper universe? I look forward to finding out.

:pinkiehappy:

This has to be the best update of the CENTURY!

OH. S**T just got complicated.

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