Like everything else in life, the service of a Royal Guard has both a beginning and an ending.

Artwork by: Ruirik
Proofread by: Eckaji, Snakeskin Ducttape, and PresentPerfect
Featured by Equestria Daily
Review link: PresentPerfect and PaulAsaran

One does not simply blaspheme the princess's tits.

Consequences may include, but are not limited to, snuggling, court-martial, and third-degree burns. And not necessarily in that order.

Entry for the Comedy (Is Serious Business) contest.

The selected prompt was "We learned something hot."

A standalone side story to Just a Little Batty.

She has the day shift; he guards the night. One pegasus, one thestral, just trying to make things work. They've known each other since childhood, so meeting the family shouldn't be quite such a big deal. But then the family tree got involved...

A Batty-verse Story

Audio Reading

Cover art by Ashinda

Editing/Proofreading by:
Dreams of Ponies
JackRipper
Level Dasher

An entry for the Everfree Northwest 2018 Scribblefest.

First night guarding turns into a strange turn of events for a newly recruited guard.

Edited by a great person called Alticron

Ruling over the Crystal Empire has required Cadance to do many things, but one day she discovers a matter that needs her more immediate attention. One of their guards has decided to retire, and when she asks him why, she comes to understand something important. Something she'd always suspected, but that nopony until today has said to her.

They say that good armour is a Royal Guard's best friend.

Sometimes, it might be a little more literal than expected.

After all, it isn’t every day that one receives shameless self-promotion from their protective attire.

Royal Guard Silver Birch knows Princess Luna's history, and her... extreme reactions to being neglected in the past. When it seems Luna has been snubbed yet again, he and his partner Winter Garden take action to shield their Princess from this slight, and spare Equestria her terrible wrath.

(Inspired by a really dumb blog I did.)

Out of possible spite, Princess Celestia has given Anthony four of her personal guards to help keep him out of trouble for the day.

What trouble, you ask? None. But that won't stop the Royal Guards from looking for some anyways.

Another entry into the "Anon-thony-verse".

The invasion is going well- not perfectly, as humanity isn't willing to go into slavery without a fight- but the odds remain firmly in the invaders' favor.

After all, to any star-spanning race, humans are just natives. No space fleets, no lasers, no antigravity, nothing. They might as well fight with bows and arrows.

And then the aliens find out that humanity does have one ally- the ponies.

The silly, fluffy, obsessed-with-friendship, and above all pacifist ponies.

The aliens are laughing.

The aliens haven't faced the ponies in combat yet.

A random snippet unrelated to anything else, written to get it out of my head so I could move on to other stuff.

Part of the Remember Fort Libris print anthology, thanks to our Kickstarter supporters!

The shifts on Princess Luna's night guard can be long and boring, but tonight Princess Luna invites you in to play a game.

EDIT: Non-mature feature box day of posting, 11/11/19!