WARNING: EXTREME LANGUAGE AND HOMOPHOBIC/RACIST SLURS. The views expressed by my characters are not my views. If you're easily offended by a piece of comedy, don't read. If you complain about it being offensive, then you're obviously not listening to me.

We're on Chapter 1. The majority of the major characters ahve not appeared yet. If this goes against the site rules, inform me and I will edit accordingly.

R. Lee Ermey wakes with a splicing headache. Where is he? He'll soon find out.

R. Lee Ermey crashed into Ponyville.

Join Ermey and the mane 6 as they work through a series of wacky adventures comparable to absolutely horrendous movies like 'Click', 'Jack and Jill' and 'AnyAdamSandlerMovieEverMade'. A completely nonsensical, fic. Written for the pure enjoyment of those mindless sheep who watch Fox News and Family Guy. Sorry Adam Sandler, Fox News and Family Guy fans. But your sense of comedy is just as terrible as mine. So we're all together in this one.

I'll read you all a quick little something from recent times... Take a seat, little brony-slash-pegasis. Story time!

It was rainy that night at the gig. Something seemed to brighten it up, not the cold mist of beer or the whispering audience. But a mare. One particular mare. One beautiful mare that seemed to bring the music to life.

Fluttershy, after a painfully awkward dance at a party with Big Macintosh, goes around Ponyville asking her friends what love feels like. This ends about as well as it could be expected to, and Rarity decides to take things into her own hooves.

01/25/12 - Director's Cut released! Rewritten! Remastered! Re... something! Whatever!

Cover art by the awesomely talented Whitestar1802 on deviantART. No, seriously, his art is incredible. Just... just go look at it.
http://whitestar1802.deviantart.com/art/So-Lovely-A-Sight-246293551

How far would you go for love? Would you travel across the world? Face peril whatever the danger? Even sacrifice your own being? Rainbow Dash will have to answer these questions as she tries to find a forbidden mirror to bring back the one she both loved and lost. But at what price will it be?

Originally publish in 01-15-12. This story has been rewritten.

For the penguins - Skipper, Kowalski, Rico, and Private -this last day could have gone better. When testing Kowalski's Dimensionator (A device to find the user's ideal dimension) on Private, they found themselves warped not to the dimension of the Lunacorns (which would be bad enough), but in a dimension called "Equestria" which is full of pastel colors and female mammals. For the penguins, this would be bad enough, but they also lost their way to get home. And just because they can't get home, doesn't mean that other animals can come to them. Animals who's greatest desire is to destroy the penguins. At least the sudden cold snap is nice. (Note: this cross over is with the Penguins of Madagascar TV show which Word of God says exists in an Alternate Universe to the Madagascar movies.)

Jesus Comes to Ponyville to give the Mane Six his blessings.

From the authors of "Her Smile" and "A Happy Accident"

When you've given everything for the one you love only to have it thrown back in your face, what is there left to do? After a bad break up between Spitfire and Rainbow Dash the two mares go their separate ways, only to find their true love has been in front of them the entire time.

Spitfire x Fluttershy with a side of Rainbow Dash x Twilight shipping

War is war. There is no in-between. In the midst of chaos and death, sometimes incredible stories surface in the military community. And sometimes, the story becomes the reality.

Corporal Ben Wolfe of the 13th Army Expeditionary Unit shouldn't be alive, but he is. He's alive because of his daughter. He's alive because of Rainbow Dash. He's alive because of the pony in his pocket.

But a plastic toy won't save you forever. A plastic pony can't go back to your family to tell them your fate. Who, then, will be with Wolfe when the end comes?

The pony in his pocket?

Featured on Equestria Daily! http://www.equestriadaily.com/2012/04/story-pony-in-my-pocket.html

Cover by totallynotabrony: http://totallynotabronyfim.deviantart.com/art/The-Pony-in-my-Pocket-cover-art-332699355

For some, it all started as a relaxing day at the spa. For another, it started with a space bridge malfunction. When a mysterious creature crash lands into the woods on the outskirts of Ponyville, Twilight Sparkle and the bearers of the Elements of Harmony must investigate the circumstances that brought this life form to Equestria, and face an unyielding force of evil that threatens their entire world. (warning: Mild language, violence)