Covers removed from his bed. A warm spot on the mattress right next to him. Strange voices and shadowy figures haunting his sleepy, delirious mind. These are but a few of the odd occurrences that have been plaguing the Anon household.

Tonight, he's going to get to the bottom of it all.

Pinkie Pie is dead. Now, everypony, including Pinkie, must figure out who killed her.

Parody of Heavy is Dead.

Reading here.
And here.

Swords, hammers, knives, pikes, spikes; even rolling pins. Princess Celestia collects them, and stashes them within her private collection for few to see.

Anon notices that a few of them have very… choice labels.

Finally, it was here. Power Ponies issue number four-hundred and nineteen, the grand finale of the 'Spectacular Siege of the Silver Stallion' arc. Spike had completed all the chores on his list, finished his afternoon nap, and ploughed through his dinner. He'd even eaten all his green vegetables. At last he could settle down, with a small bowl of gems to snack on, and experience the most anticipated comic issue in living memory.

Sadly for him, Twilight was acting strange. At least, stranger than usual.

For context, set prior to the events of the Season 4 Finale 'Twilight's Kingdom'.

Cover art courtesy of K_LAsh147 on Twitter.

Twilight is told by Celestia that she needs to touch grass.

And she will stop at nothing to fulfill that mission.

For obvious reasons, Hearts and Hooves Day has always been Cadance's favorite holiday. She and Shining Armor like to spend the holiday in Ponyville, but while Shining is busy making preparations for the evening, Cadance was hoping to meet up with Twilight to tease Anon for being single. Again. To their surprise, he has gone missing. Now, the hunt is on for Ponyville's resident human. Did he really get a special somepony, or is he just trying to avoid the princess of love again?

Meanwhile, Anon isn't aware that his whereabouts are a secret.

By sheer dumb luck, you learned about an upcoming invasion of Ponyville planned by Queen Chrysalis and her army of changelings. Unfortunately, there are two major problems. First, Twilight and her friends are currently on vacation, meaning that the only thing standing between the changelings and Ponyville is little old you. Second, the invasion is supposed to occur at sunrise, which is about an hour away.

Oh dear.

Luna gets deep into video game streaming. But when her comment section gets flooded by thirsty ponies she turns to Anon for help.

Disaster ensues.

You've been the only human in Equestria for some time now. However, it wasn't until this morning that your good friend Twilight suggested you take a peek through the Crystal Mirror. Supposedly, there is another world on the other side of that mirror populated by humans just like you.

She conveniently left out the fact that she herself turns into a human when she passes through it.

In hindsight, you probably should have seen this coming.

Nature is a beautiful thing. That is especially true in Equestria, and you love every minute that you spend here.

Well, with the exception of one evening each year.

When good ol' nature says that it's the time of year for mares to be ready to reproduce, most have prepared more than enough methods of dealing with their urges one way or another. For most, it's about a week or two of mild discomfort. For alicorns, it's about six hours of uncontrollable urges and pure instinct.

And seeing as how you are the husband of the now-retired Celestia, you have every reason to fear for your life tonight.

There is no clop in this story, I swear.