Damned if Anon knew why he was assigned a caretaker, considering he was a grown-ass man, but that's exactly what the Princesses had done after he arrived in Equestria. Aside from the deluded, motherly nut-job that looked after himself, his life was pretty normal. He worked a job, he had bills to pay, and he did his best to find a place for himself - regrettably and much to his continued misery, his mom™ always found a way to complicate matters.

Kinks Include: Wholesome, albeit questionable affection between a large, older mare and her adopted son

Artwork by AnonTheAnon (Twitter @RealAnonTheAnon)

If you want to help support me, I have a Tip-Jar/Patreon HERE

This story is a sequel to Cold

Time flows differently, in the multitude of plains that make up the universe. Seconds here can be hours there... and hours here can be decades over there. There is, however, one universal constant among all time and space: Time never stops. Perhaps I counted on time as my ally when I cast that spell and dove into the past... if only I'd know just how cruel and unwavering it can really be.

Thirty years, I've tried... in most other worlds, it's probably been hundreds, but I've managed to keep track. Thirty years of searching, trying and trying again, desperately doing everything in my power to bring you back... and all that I've learned is that unless I make this choice, it's simply not possible... I hope you'll forgive me. I know that'll be hard... but maybe given enough time, you'll understand... -Twilight Sparkle

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Diego had been living in Equestria for a little less than a month. Well, that's what it says in all the documents for the last six months. In any case, his life was quite peaceful. Surprisingly, when all his neighbors lose things, he only gets more of them. Well, it's just an accident, right?

However, any lie is revealed sooner or later. And today this day has come, the day when Luna personally came to Diego's house. The day when justice will prevail. Unfortunately, there are two problems for the princess.

First, she was sent to do this during the day, when she did not even sleep properly and did not drink at least a pool of coffee.

And secondly, Diego is ready for this meeting.

Sombra never realized this would happen.
Usually a villain is suppose to be defeated, right?
So, why did he, well...win?
Even he was shocked to see the crystal heart in his hooves. Never in a thousand or so years did he think he would pull this off; that he would actually...win.
So, what will he do now? Just rule over everyone and enslave all of pony kind? Or Perhaps kill the princess and mind control that purple unicorn and her friends? Or maybe have some common sense and figure out just how he will deal with all of this in the long run? With all these questions, he knows one thing for sure.
This is going to be very awkward.

Princess Celestia is in your bed, and you don't know why: what do?

Cute, funny, and short. Have fun reading!

Proofreading by RaylanKrios.
Now with audio reading by CaptainBron3y
Second audio reading by MeloncholyIguana.

Based on this story:
Princess Celestia is (still) in your Bed
Princess Celestia Has Stolen All Your Bed Sheets
Drunk CelestAI Is In Your Bed
Fimfic Authors Are In Your Bed
Princess Celestia is in Your Washing Machine

King Sombra has a problem. A Twilight Sparkle shaped problem. The evil ruler of the Crystal Kingdom is about to be overthrown unless he can hold out until reinforcements arrive.

Seven days of keeping Twilight at bay. What's the worst that can happen?

All he has to lose is his self-respect and dignity...

This story takes place in an AU where Cadance and Shining Armor never got together. The world is otherwise unchanged.

The "Princess of Love" has many duties. Ruling over the Crystal Empire is, of course, her top priority, but she also oversees all matters relating to love.

...Well, that's a bit of a lie. While she is gifted in love magic, she rarely uses it. Love isn't something to be played with, after all. Still, that won't stop her from enjoying her super-secret hobby that absolutely no one is allowed to know about.

Except Anon. She likes him.

Day #7 of Hearts and Hands Week.

One day, Zeke Daniels, the only human in Equestria, asks Princess Celestia a simple question: why don't ponies have queens?

Special thanks to The Fan Without A Face and PoisonClaw for proofreading and editing!

[F]

Ever since they met, Anon has acted strangely around Discord. He's used to this, of course. Being the "Lord of Chaos" means that most creatures prefer to keep a safe distance from him. And for good reason! Reformed though he may be, it'd be foolish to lower one's guard around him.

Perhaps Discord isn't as good at reading emotions as he thought.

Day #6 of Hearts and Hands Week.

Discord is a cocky, overbearing, goofy free spirit. Anon is a cocky, brutally honest, nonchalant free spirit. Both can be incredibly big douches when they want to be, but the girls still like them both even with their flaws.
But one day, Anon finally meets Discord. And he decides he doesn't like him.