Celestia wants Twilight and her friends to loosen up a little bit around her. Luna just wants to try the hard cider. During a surprise visit to Sweet Apple Acres at the tail end of cider season, Princess Luna has just a bit too much to drink, and when she makes a rather inappropriate joke, Twilight comes to the very uncomfortable realization that she has never seen Celestia excuse herself to use the restroom.

The history of Equestria spans dozens of centuries, and many terrible foes have risen up from the past to threaten the future once more, only to be defeated.

When a vicious and powerful enemy older than any Twilight, her friends, or even the Princesses have faced before returns, they will have to reach out to an ally just as ancient for help... but is she still the heroine she once was?

This story takes place after the end of Season 3.

Honourable Mention: Best Fimfiction, Pony Awards 2013

Full-Cast, Illustrated Audio Drama version by Scribbler Productions can be found here!

Hardcopy editions from Ponyfeather Publishing can be found here!

Derpy Hooves is secretly a changeling.

Nopony particularly notices, or cares.

(New 9/15/19: Spanish translation by Spaniard Kiwi! Thank you!)

This is a story of how the grand spirits of Tyranny and Pride fought in ages long past, battling over the future of the world 'neath stars newly born on a nameless field in the distant north. It is a story of blank skies, of strange endeavors, and of things prehistoric. At least, that's how it starts.

The Crystal Empire makes Equestria look young, and Twilight Sparkle is about to find out just how old Celestia really is.

Growing up in the ruins of Fillydelphia, the orphan Spike is abducted by a group of six of the most dangerous mercenaries, bounty hunters, assassins, and roundabout crazy people in Badworld. The six have little interest in working with eachother, but a blackmailing Celesticorp and rival Luna Industries can make the life of any Badworld survivor tenuous at best.
Spike is stuck relying on his would-be captors if he wants to avoid Luna Industrie's subversive grasp.
Fortunately, Gilda always has an ace up her sleeves, or in this case a horse in her dreams.
A ragtag bunch of 'friends' is more than many have in the Badworld, but it's not always enough.

Image graciously provided by Fembot13 on deviant art.
Pre read by a variety of people including:
-AlicornPriest
-OrphiusOlyandra
-Timefather64
-PiquoPie

A relatively normal day is disrupted when Luna learns that Orcus, the Demon Prince of Undeath, has escaped from Tartarus and is making his bid for conquest, starting with Ponyville. More horrifying though... is that fact that only she seems to care. Time is of the essence, and no one, Celestia included, seems worried about the impending disaster. Will Luna be able to rally the army, shake the citizens of Canterlot from their strange apathy, and save the day?

No. No she will not.

Everypony in this town is crazy.

(Special thanks to my Prereaders, many of whom do not have accounts, for convincing me this fic didn't suck. Also, thanks to Danmakuman for the cover art!)

Metal Gear has fallen into the hooves of an Equestrian revolutionary, who, with the backing of his human mercenary allies, intends to use it to depose Celestia and crown himself ruler. Having crossed into Equestria in pursuit of this rogue weapon, the legendary Solid Snake must ally with the residents of Ponyville to prevent a nuclear catastrophe.

See also Equestria Gear Solid, the hilarious spin-off EQG parody in which everything you know is wrong, and every single character from the story is an awful caricature of themselves.

Now with its own TVtropes page!

To Twilight Sparkle and Princess Celestia, it is a simple surprise visit to Canterlot. To the ponies of the Equestrian Civil Service, it is twenty-four hours of chaos, politics, weaponized dessert, politics, underhooved manipulation of media, politics, and things batrachian and tentacular. Who said bureaucracy isn't exciting?

Twilight Sparkle attends her first Election Day as a citizen of Ponyville! However, things don't go according to plan when her own notoriety catches up with her a few hours before the votes are cast. Twilight is forced to reconcile both her time as a royal insider and her new position as a member of the Common Assembly, but can her personal morals live up to her political responsibilities? Can her loyalty to Celestia?

King Sombra has a problem. A Twilight Sparkle shaped problem. The evil ruler of the Crystal Kingdom is about to be overthrown unless he can hold out until reinforcements arrive.

Seven days of keeping Twilight at bay. What's the worst that can happen?

All he has to lose is his self-respect and dignity...