Dragons, as a rule, are not subtle creatures.

Dragonlord Ember is far from a typical dragon.

Garble wishes he had a sane dragon for a Dragonlord, instead of some Cunning Optimist who's going to get them all killed.

Change is coming to dragonkind, one way or another.

Received an Honorable Mention in FanOfMostEverything's Imposing Sovereigns Contest. (It was in the "Ember the Mad" slot.)

Edited by SirNotAppearingInThisFic.

Cover Art borrowed from DeathPwny.

If diplomacy is an art form, then it's surely the most boring one of the lot. After a full day of fruitless trade negotiations with the Crystal Empire, I'm about ready to give up my royal title if it means avoiding more mind-numbing talks tomorrow. In the meantime, though, at least there's a nightclub in town. And from what I've heard, her Highness Princess Flurry Heart is its most frequent, infamous, and insatiable patron.

On second thought, maybe this trip won't be as tedious as I thought.

My entry for FanOfMostEverything's "Imposing Sovereigns" contest, using the prompt "Partier Flurry Heart. Rated Teen for language, drug use, and suggestive (but non-explicit) content.

Cover image cropped from this piece by Plainoasis. (Sorry, Glim-Glam, but you're not in this story so you had to go.)

Thanks to Themaskedferret for editing/cheerleading assistance.

Recent archaeological expeditions to far-flung corners of the Old Kingdoms have revealed a wealth of pre-Celestian artefacts, dating as far back as the Hearthfire Wars. These artefacts shed a light on an era we of contemporary Equestria really know very little about, and the stories they share range from the highest court intrigues to the humblest backwater folktales.

This account, found engraved in the wall of an old Pegasi garrison known as the Eastmarch, relates the final night of a condemned mare, in one of the last wars of the pre-Celestian era. It has been translated for the benefit of the modern reader.

Pre-read by the inimitable Admiral Biscuit.
And now with a reading from resident crooner Illya Leonov.

Reviewed by Seattle's Angels,13 January 2018

Spiders. Nightmares on eight scuttling legs. An entire group of creatures so bizarre, menacing, and creepy in their habits that a specific phobia has been dedicated to them. It's proven to be surprisingly popular. Or unpopular, as the case may be.

For Fluttershy, though, there's a lot more to them than that. A friend to all living creatures can hardly discriminate amongst her charges. And surprisingly for her, a day when she devotes her time and energy solely to these alien animals proves to be one of the most enjoyable ones of her week.

Princess Celestia has inspired many writers, artists and poets over her centuries as both ruler and Princess of the Sun. Now she invites one pony to do a special task for her.

A tale of poetry, pornography, puns, printing presses and pretty pony princesses.

Audiobook by Illya Leonov, ft Luna Farrowe and Shadow of Cygnus

Cover image by Linnpuzzle
Edited by Solstice Shimmer and BaeroRemedy.
Special thanks to Dr Bethan Tovey for help with the Old English.

“How is it that gems like these are always hidden so deep? I love your poetry, can't get enough of it.”

— SillyMare

“This is just really stellar, I hope everyone checks it out.”

— PresentPerfect

“A concept which in the hands of just about anyone would have become empty prurience is instead warm and brilliant and funny and just lovely.”

— GhostOfHeraclitus

With Celestia out on vacation for a week, Cadance sees a fine opportunity to spend some time with her Auntie Luna, who's now in control of Equestria for that time. She's always known Luna to be a bit... different, but she never thought she'd find herself suspecting her Auntie Luna of trying to take over Equestria again. Is she simply over-thinking things, or is something truly the matter with Auntie?

Set mid Season 2.

Featured on: 1/30/17!
Also, this is now my 5th story to have 100 likes!
Also pt2, this story was featured in SA Review #104! Check it out here!

SPOILERS IN COMMENTS
Preread/Edited by MLPMatthew419 and Mocha Star

All Vapor Trail wanted to do was ask Sky Stinger on a date. But as it turns out, Sky Stinger has a reason why the two of them can't go out.

Ember wants to see the rise of a smarter, friendlier dragon society in the future. For her dragon subjects, this presents quite a steep learning curve.

Vinyl Scratch, the mare behind DJ PON-3’s purple shades, is boldly exploring new frontiers of electronic dance music. Meanwhile, Spilt Ink, music critic for Sound on Sound magazine, is just as boldly exploring how far he can stick his head up his own rectum.

Trace the trajectory of one mare’s career—and one stallion’s sanity—through this peek into the music world’s sordid underbelly: the album reviews.

“If you want to see a pure distillation of the most conceited reviewership possible, look no further!” —Chris
“Overimportant pretentiousness ...” —Present Perfect
“The complete verbal destruction evoked from this critic is so outstandingly cruel, it feels like I’m viewing a different kind of art.” —Tired Old Man
“Enough WUT in it to potentially scare away some readers.” — PaulAsaran

Sold out on 31 Jan 2017.

This story can be enjoyed on its own, or as a companion piece to Octaves, by JapaneseTeeth. Basically, JT asked me to help with the music reviews in one chapter of his story. I enjoyed writing in the voice of a stuck-up indie music critic so much, I couldn’t stop myself from writing more, and then this story happened.

Big thanks to my pre-readers/editors:
JapaneseTeeth
KuroiTsubasaTenshi
War877
EQD Pre-reader 63.546

Cover art kludged together by yours truly. Vinyl Scratch vector by hfbn2. Sound on Sound logo is a parody of the Consequence of Sound logo.

A year after the first Hearth's Warming, unification hasn't gone as smoothly as ponies would have hoped. Old grudges and hostilities flare up despite the best efforts from their leaders. By the time the second Hearth's Warming has come around, cold, bitter feelings claw once more at Princess Platinum's heart.

Things take a turn for the weirder when she finds a tree in her living room and Commander Hurricane in her kitchen. He promises that there's a simple explanation for everything.

The only catch is that the 'explanation' will take all night. Generous though she may be, Platinum can settle for two hours.

The clock is ticking, Hurricane.

Written as a Christmas present for Fahrenheit, posted now after giving time for Farrie to savour it first.

Cover art by Rossby Waves.
Preread by Carabutt.