Just an average storyteller. Though quite busy in real life, when I do get time I do enjoy entertaining those who will listen...

Don't read my stuff if you have a weak stomach or are easily bothered by traumatic genitalia damage. That's seriously all I've got in here!

We're going to build an exact copy of Ponyville... right over there! We've got less than a minute!

I tend to focus on love and relationships, and what ponies would think of experiencing such a thing with a human. Throw money at me here https://www.patreon.com/captainanonymous

Every breath, every step, is towards a new dawn.

"I haven't seen a bigger waste of talent since Dan Marino." -Lucky Seven; Want to support me?

"I'll try sir."

Dethrone the dictaphone, hit it in its funny bone, that's where they expect it least.

I want nothing more than to bring a smile to your face with a light-hearted clopfic! If you want to bring a smile to mine, leave a comment!

I...I am a monument to all your sins...

"Fanfic [has] been on the decline since the Aeneid." --Anonymous poster 18/03/15

I will hear no more of this Hebrew nonsense

Thanks for Coming In! | Retired

I wrote hoers (Ko-Fi/Patreon)

I read. I write. I edit. I Twidash. But above all else, I'm just a regular guy. Shoot me a PM if you have a question.

Selling out has never felt so dirty.

I write about cute horses doing cute things. Also known as Ephemeral on /mlp/